Oh crap. Crap crap crap crap crap!

Pam stared at the name. The name she'd had permanently applied to her body. The name of the man she loved.

Lisa came into the room with her tea.

"Lis, how the hell did this happen to me?"

Lisa laughed, "I think it had something to do with the champagne. And the cosmopolitans. But mostly I would have to blame the jello shots."

Pam glared at her cousin. "How could you let this happen? It's all your fault!"

The smile disappeared from Lisa's face. "Pam, as I recall, you were all alone when you got that tattoo. The rest of us were outside. We had nothing to do with choosing that name! I think you'd better ask yourself how and why you let this happen!" She stomped out of the room and slammed the door behind her.

Crap.

Roy had been furious with her. She tried to deflect blame by questioning him about his bachelor party. He was so angry at that point he started spilling everything. Everything that Pam had never wanted to know. Everything that her friends told her not to ask about. Pam was so horrified that when Roy demanded to know for the last time how Jim's name had come to end up on her ankle Pam told him the truth. Told him that she had asked for the name of the man she loved.

Roy couldn't say anything then. His face turned bright red and Pam had a fleeting thought that his head might explode like some demented cartoon. He grabbed his keys and the duffel bag he had just brought in with him and he was gone.

Crap.

Roy found her at Lisa's the next day. Pam could see he was still angry but he stayed calm long enough to tell her at the very least he thought they should postpone the wedding. Beyond that, he said it was her decision. She nodded sadly and told him she'd let him know.

Pam called out sick Monday and Tuesday. She was absolutely at a loss as to what to do. She had already rejected Jim on Casino Night when he kissed her and told her how he felt. They had worked together for days without speaking and it was tearing her apart. Now she had lost Roy too.

Tuesday was Jim's last day and Pam knew Michael was having a little goodbye gathering for him at Poor Richard's that night. He was off to Australia then he was transferring to Stamford.

Lisa came home from work to find Pam had actually gotten off the couch and showered.

"Hey tattoo girl! You suddenly care about personal hygiene again? What's the occasion?"

Pam gave her the same evil eye she'd been sending her way since she'd been sleeping on her couch. "I've got a thing I've got to do."

"This wouldn't have anything to do with a certain name on a certain part of your anatomy, would it?" Lisa ducked when the couch cushion came flying her way. "Gosh we're sensitive today!" She laughed all the way into the kitchen.

Pam grabbed her keys and yelled, "Don't wait up!"

She didn't have clue what she was going to do or say. She thought maybe seeing Jim would make some sense of everything. When she entered the bar, the first person she came across, unfortunately, was Dwight.

"Pam, I notice you're attending an after work function despite the fact that you were out 'sick' today. This is clearly in violation of written company policy."

Pam gave him a look so withering that Dwight suddenly felt the need to slink off to the men's room.

She stepped right up to the bar and ordered a cosmopolitan which she downed in 4 big gulps. She ordered another.

"Courage drink," she whispered to nobody in particular.

"What was that, Beesley?"

She whirled around to see Jim standing there. At that moment the bartender set her second drink on the bar. She grabbed it and took a swig. Jim was looking at her, a small cautious smile on his face. He was so handsome, looking at her with those green eyes.

A person could get lost in those eyes. And don't even get me started on those lips...

"Earth to Pam!" Jim snapped his fingers in front of her face. "I know you just got here so you can't be drunk yet!"

He flashed a grin and she felt her stomach tighten. Suddenly, she knew. She knew what drunk Pam was trying to tell her. Drunk Pam had kissed Jim at the Dundies. Drunk Pam had tattooed his name on her ankle. Sober Pam had always managed to deny things; deny the attraction, deny the heat, deny the overwhelming love she felt for him. She needed drunk Pam here to help her say what needed to be said.

But not falling-down drunk Pam. Let's try to get tipsy Pam here.

She took another swig of her drink and felt more confident already. She smiled at him and said brightly, "So how was your last day?"

He rolled his eyes in mock disgust, secretly thrilled that she was talking to him again and smiling.

"Dwight tried to give me an exit interview which involved making me confess all the pranks I've done to him over the years. I really think he's gonna miss me!"

And they fell right back into their old banter. They kept it light, neither wanting to admit that he was leaving, but they enjoyed themselves.

Eventually their co-workers all went home. Most left Jim with hugs and well wishes. Except for Creed who wished Pam good luck at Stanford University.

They were huddled together in a booth at the back corner of the restaurant. Pam was nursing her fourth cosmopolitan. She calculated that to be the right balance between courage and alcoholism. Jim was looking at her with that face - the one he had on the Booze Cruise, the one he had right before he told her he was in love with her, and the one he had after he kissed her. Before she reminded him that she was marrying Roy.

He spoke before she had a chance to decide how she would start.

"Pam, I heard something today. About you and Roy..."

And she could see in his eyes that he so badly wanted it to be true.

She was nodding before he finished, "It's true, Jim. The wedding is off."

He drew in a breath, "And are you...ummm...."

She reached over and placed her hand on his, "He left it up to me but yeah, we're over."

His eyes closed. "What happened?" he asked quietly.

She pulled her hand back and leaned over. He was puzzled as she rolled down her sock and lifted her Ked-clad foot up to rest on the table in front of him.

"What...?" He didn't see it right away. Pam pointed.

He started laughing. Seeing him set her off and she started giggling. They sat there laughing together for a while before either of them could speak.

"I need to tell you," she said. She jumped up and came around to his side of the booth and moved in to sit as close to him as she could. He put his arm around her shoulders and she leaned into him. When she looked up and caught his eyes, she found herself moving closer and before she had time to think, she was kissing him. He was taken by surprise but in no time he was kissing her back and she couldn't believe she had ever thought about letting him go.

When she finally pulled back and saw the look on his face, she was completely overwhelmed.

"Jim, I don't even know how to start to tell you everything. But I can tell you this - I'm in love with you too. I'm in love with you and I couldn't even admit it to myself."

He smiled at her, his fingers stroking her hair. "Why don't you start by telling me how you got my name tattooed on your ankle?"

After that, it was easy to tell him everything.

************************************************

Jim was so different from Roy. Sober Pam soon learned that. Soon learned that there wasn't a single thing she couldn't tell him and it didn't take a few drinks to get her courage up anymore.

But just to be safe, when she and Jim got married she decided not to have another bachelorette party.

THE END