Chapter Five:
Feeling very manly with his Build-A-Bear box, Jim walked back out into the mall. Business was beginning to pick up, and it was getting more crowded. He pulled out his list again and, taking out a pen from his pocket, boldly crossed out the pink cat. He then focused his attention to the third item on the list:
Christmas Classics Collection/FYE
After what he had just been through, FYE sounded like a dream. Unfortunately, it was all the way at the other end of the mall, meaning he had quite a walk ahead of him with his house-shaped box. He headed in the direction of FYE, a constant stream of “excuse me”s coming out of his mouth as his box bumped against the other shoppers. With each person he jabbed with a cardboard corner, he wanted to crawl farther and farther into his coat. About halfway to his destination, he heard voice call out “Tuna!”
There was only one person on the planet that called him “Tuna”, and that person just happened to be one of the people he could have not wanted to see less today. He paused, wondering if he could pretend he didn’t hear Andy’s call, but as he did so he felt a hand slap him on the shoulder. It was too late.
“Tuna! What are you doing here?” Andy said, his voice showing no signs of sleep deprivation at all. He then looked down at Jim’s Build-A-Bear box. “Making yourself a new friend?”
“Um, no...just picking up some things for Pam. Which I should be getting back to...” Jim attempted to turn around and walk away, but Andy grabbed his shoulder again.
“Hey, since you’re here I’ve got a little situation that I could use your help with. See, me and Angela...we’re kind of together now. Well we’re not together, together but you get my drift. And I am having the hardest time finding her a Christmas present. It has to be something totally awesome, you know, but...”
“Look, Andy...I really would like to help but...”
“Great! Come on, I’ll show you what I’ve been looking at!” Before Jim knew what was happening Andy had led him over to a kiosk selling various photo gifts. He picked up a cube with a photo on each side, except for one with a speaker and two buttons.
“See, you can put pictures in it and then record a message. I was thinking I’d put some of the pictures she has of her and that cat that Dwight killed...”
Jim watched the kiosk operator’s eyes widen at this as Andy spoke.
“...and then I could record myself singing a romantic ballad. How does that sound?”
A photo cube filled with pictures of Angela and her dead cat, which caused the breakup of her prior relationship, paired with a recording of Andy singing sounded like the worst gift on Earth. And Jim knew deep down that he should be honest with Andy. But, weighing his options, he decided that letting Angela wind up with a horrible Christmas gift would still be better than spending any more time with Andy in the mall.
Just then, Andy spoke up again. “Or I could go into Victoria’s Secret...I know she doesn’t seem to be that type but I mean, come on...there has to be something....”
“No! Um, Andy, I think the photo thing is a great idea. You should just get that.” Jim said urgently, hoping that Andy would just listen to him and let him get on with his list.
“Yeah, I think so too. Thanks for the help, Tuna!. Say, is Pam here somewhere?”
Had Jim been fully awake, he would have realized that the proper thing to do would be to protect Pam by saying she was not there. However, in his current state that thought process didn’t exactly take place, and he nodded his head. “Not sure where, though.”
“Great. I’ll go see if I can track her down...that artsy mind of hers would be great for helping me pick out a card.” And with that, Andy hurried off into the crowd of shoppers.
Realizing what he had just done, Jim whipped out his phone and brought up a new text message.
Andy is in the mall. Hide. P.S. You owe me.
He waited until Andy was a safe distance away before continuing on his own mission. “Next year” he said to himself “we’re buying everything online.”
Author's Chapter Notes:
Sorry it's been so long. My finals ended like three days before Christmas, and then with the holiday itself I was pretty busy.
