One

Jim sat at a table in the break room alone; flicking the tab on the top of his near-empty Coke can mindlessly, trying to pay attention to the sports pages spread out in front of him.

It was too quiet.  Everywhere he went was too quiet.  This room, his apartment, the bar Mark dragged him to last night, the entire office itself.  Despite the fact that life went on, the everyday antics of Michael, the drama of Angela, Andy and Dwight, nothing around him seemed to be able to distract him.  

Although as far as Angela and Dwight went, something was going on there.  He was sure of it.

Pam would be able to figure it out...if only she were here.  And with that thought he missed her more. 

If he'd been counting he'd be on roughly the four thousandth time he'd thought of her today.  After he dropped her off last Sunday he'd decided he'd give her a little room to get settled.  If this was the first week - he didn't know if he'd survive the summer.

He heard the sound of heels clicking on the linoleum and he raised his head, his gaze focused hopefully on the door.   Though he knew it couldn't be he still felt his heart pound and stomach flip at the mere thought of who might be walking through.  When he spotted Kelly he smiled faintly and looked back down at his paper again silently willing her to keep walking.

He should have known better.

"JIM."  She gave an exaggerated sigh.

"Hey, Kel."  He mumbled, picking up the paper and hiding behind it, pretending to be engrossed in the Phillies box score.

Undeterred, she took a seat across from him.  "Aww.  You look so sad."

"I'm okay."

"It's sweet that you miss her.  I know what that's like.  I sometimes miss Ryan.  Sort of.  A little.  Mostly when I watch reruns of Sex and the City."

Jim didn't know if it was the sex or the city that reminded Kelly of Ryan but he did know he didn't want to find out.

Kelly sometimes sounded like she was speaking underwater to him, sort of like the teacher in those Charlie Brown specials.  It was just an annoying incoherent noise.  She let out a squeal and Jim decided he was wrong.  When she did that she sounded like a teakettle whistling.  It was a high pitched almost eardrum piercing sound. 

"Ohmigod."

"What?"

"Shoes.  On sale.  There's a Macy's coupon on that page.  Can I have it?  Pretty please?  I don't get the paper at home..."

As she pounced and tore a small square from Jim's paper, she effectively decapitated first-baseman Ryan Howard in the process.

Appropriate, he thought stifling a laugh as he bit his lip and regarded her closely.  "Really?  That's surprising."

"Nah.  It's too depressing.  Like you, sitting here all sad without your wittle gwirlfriend.  Oh - I mean fiancé.   It's good though - that you asked her before she left. And she's wearing that ring so everyone knows she's taken.  Except, come to think of it - when she had a ring last time that didn't stop you from going after her..."

"That's not why - and I didn't go..."

She talked right over his attempted explanation.  "Anyway I'll sit with you sometimes Jim, if you need someone to talk to.  I'm good at advice.  Holly said I could keep writing my column in the newsletter.  I think I've learned from my dating mistakes, and I think you have too."

"Right."

Jim put down the paper and took the last sip of his soda.  As he placed it back on the table Kelly noticed him playing with the tab on the top of the can.  "You know if you recite the alphabet when you do that it'll break off on the letter that's the initial of the person you'll marry.  I'm not sure how well it works though.  I've gotten "R" only once - so I know it's not Ryan and "D" just twice - so maybe it might be Darryl.  Except I get "N" almost every other time.  And I've never dated anyone with a name that starts with an "N".  Unless you count Nick Coleman in second grade and I certainly don't."

He stared at the top of the can intently as Kelly stood and walked to the door. "I wouldn't either."  He agreed, not quite sure what he was agreeing to.

He bent the tab on the can back and forth silently reciting the alphabet.  When he reached the letter "P" it came off with a resounding snap.  Smiling widely, he placed the tab in his pocket and went back to reading the paper.

xoxoxo

Two

Pam took her sandwich and moved to a shadier bench.  She gazed around the park and made a mental note of her surroundings, noting the streetlamp, the dent in the small mesh fence bordering the grass, the homeless woman wearing a blue wool coat in eighty-five degree heat.  She had decided today she had to be more careful about knowing where she was.    She'd gotten lost five times her first week.

Two days a week she had classes in Manhattan and if she was being honest, it terrified her.  She was fine in Brooklyn, her apartment was only a few blocks from campus and now, after the first week it felt almost familiar to her.  When she rode the subway into Manhattan it was a different story.  She felt the need to twist her ring around so that the diamond was facing in, to not make eye contact, to keep the sound muted on her iPod so she could appear relaxed but still able to hear the mumbled announcement declaring that she could transfer to the F train at Bergen Street.

As Pam took a small bite she was startled from her thoughts by the chime of her cell phone.  Fumbling to answer it she eked out a breathless..."Hello?"

"What's a six letter word for desolate?"

At the sound of Jim's voice Pam smiled widely and reclined against the bench, stretching her legs out in front of her.  She also relaxed the death grip she'd had on her purse.  "Did you steal Stanley's crossword or are you trying to tell me something?"

"Both.  Okay, total lie.  No crossword.  I'm just bored.  And I miss you.  Pretty much that simple.   What's for lunch?"

"I miss you too."  She'd be so lost in thought she hadn't really tasted what she was eating.  Pam regarded the sandwich in her hand.  "Hmmm.  I think it's chicken salad."

"If you're not sure I suggest you stop eating it - like - now."

She took another bite, her appetite seeming to return all of the sudden.  "No, it's chicken or...maybe it's tuna.  Anyway I think I'll live."

"How you doing?  Did you get to class okay today?"

"Thankfully yes.  But oh!  Can you give a message to Dwight for me?"

"A message for Dwight?  Ohhhkay..."

"Tell him I passed the dojo he recommended today and I signed up for classes starting next week."

"What?  You did not."

"No Jim.  Of course not.  But when I come home and tell him I learned a "ninja death hold" you need to back me up when I say it's too dangerous to demonstrate."

"Done."

She squinted against the sun and then stared down at her lap, getting a bit of a chill as the warmth of his laughter suddenly dissipated.  She fiddled with her ring knowing he was waiting for her to bring it up. 

"Okay.  So.  I know why you really called.  It's about what we were talking about last night..."  Pam took a steadying breath before she spoke again.  "I meant it Jim. I really don't think I can do this."

"Pam. C'mon..."

"I know you think I can and I did too but I'm not so sure anymore."

"It's only been two weeks..."

"And I'm here for twelve.  I have ten more weeks left..."

"Let's take it a day at a time, okay?  Besides, this week's almost over anyway.  I'll be there by about nine the latest on Friday I figure.  I'm going to try and duck out early."

The idea of Jim being here with her so soon seemed to settle her nerves a little.  Maybe it would be easier to convince him she was a failure in person anyway.

"Okay."

"So.  What are the plans this weekend anyway? Is there a gallery or something..."

She blew out a breath and shook her head.  She knew he was trying, and he was so supportive of this but wandering around SoHo searching for some gallery was the very last thing she wanted to do this weekend. 

"Can we just go to the movies?"

"Sure.  What do you want to see?  You want to go to that artsy place downtown?"

"No.  I mean the regular movies.  I want to see something mainstream and normal - like that scary one with Marky Mark or something."

"That thing?  Pam.  It's supposed to be terrible."

"I don't care.  I just want to sit with you where's it's cool and dark and eat popcorn."

"You've got some kinky fantasies there Beesly."

"I just need a break.  Everyone I meet seems so impressed with themselves, talking about things I have no clue about, trying way too hard.  I don't know who I'm supposed to be here."

"You're not supposed to be anyone - you're just supposed to be you."

"I know that.  And you're right. It's just I'm having trouble finding me lately."

"Well I'll help you look when I'm there this weekend.  Who knows - you might be hiding under the bed."

"Or maybe you'll find me on it."  She said, laughing in spite of herself.

"Another great option.  So if I understand you correctly what you're saying is you want a simple, boring, uncomplicated, typical date - Scranton-style."

The tightness in her chest loosened further as she nodded.  "Exactly."

"Then you've got it."  Jim's voice lowered slightly and Pam felt an entirely different chill sneak up her spine.  "Just one thing.  If I do find you anywhere in the vicinity of the bed, is there a chance I'll get lucky at the end of this simple, boring, uncomplicated date?"

"You forgot typical.  And I don't know.  What typically happens when you take me out in Scranton?"

She could hear the smile in his voice when he answered.  "I'll take that as a yes."

xoxoxo

Three

"It works better if you rest it on the windowsill."  Pam blew a stray curl out of her eyes as she watched Jim try and angle her laptop to catch a signal.

"Look at you.  Total felon.  I should turn you in for blatant wireless poaching."

"I keep meaning to buy one of those card thingies but I try not to do much outside of school and they have free wi-fi there."  She laughed and sank down on the bed next to him.  "Okay before I show you this let me prepare you.  It's not a huge deal.  It's kind of like that thing I did for Michael's commercial - but a little more elaborate."  She typed furiously on the keyboard and then stood and stepped back, tugging the hem of her tee shirt in nervous anticipation of his reaction.

Jim watched the screen expectantly as the animated design danced across eventually forming the Dunder-Mifflin logo.

He gazed over at Pam, a smile tugging at his lips.  "Can I get a copy of this?"

"I can email it to you I guess.  Why?"

"I want to use it as my screen saver."  He replied.  "I could do that right?"

He looked so delighted she felt a blush creeping to her cheeks as she sat beside him again and nodded.  "Sure.  You could but Jim - you don't have to."

"I want to."  He leaned in kissed her lingering over it for a long, lovely few moments before he pulled away.

When he did she sighed and reached up to run a hand over his cheek.  "Nine weeks."

"Coming up on eight."  He nodded back, brushing his lips over hers again.  "Long enough for you to get a real Brooklyn accent."

"Hardly."  She smiled as her eyes caught his and held.  "I'm starting to get more used to being here though.  And the bagels are really amazing..."

"Yeah I noticed you seem to like them."  He tilted his head in the direction of her tiny galley kitchen.  "You've got like four dozen in your freezer."

"Not four - maybe two."  She said as she shrugged.  "Whatever.  They're good.  And relatively cheap.  And I can eat them anytime of day.  I made pizza bagels for dinner the other night." 

"Sounds delicious."  Jim snapped her laptop shut and stretched out diagonally across her bed.  Pam followed settling herself in the crook of his arm, twining her leg around his.  She rested a hand on his stomach and patted gently.  He pressed a kiss to the top of her head and murmured.  "So that's it.  All New York has to offer you is bagels?"

"No."  She chuckled back at him.  "I'm learning a lot and it is exciting to be here - now that I've stopped getting lost every time I walk out the door.  But..."

"What?"

"I just....I don't think I'll ever want to live here permanently."

"Okay.  But it's just for the summer Pam..."

"No I know.  But I was thinking maybe Philadelphia instead?  I think maybe that's more my speed.  I don't know..."

Jim pulled her to him, trailing his fingers up and down her spine.  They lay there, listening to the sounds of the street down below, the rhythmic hum of the ceiling fan, the pounding of the bass from her next-door neighbor's speakers.  None of these sounds kept her awake anymore, not like they had that first week she spent here alone.  Pam's eyes had just begun to get heavy and flutter closed when she heard him speak again.

"We'll figure it out.  Once you're finished and decide what you really want to do I promise it'll all work out.  But we don't have to figure it all out tonight do we?"

"No not tonight." 

His mouth trailed a path to her temple pressing a soft kiss there before he bent his head to whisper in her ear.  "I'm so proud of you Pam.  You really are amazing - you know that right?"

"Thank you."  She smiled as she shifted to press her lips to his. "So are you."

xoxoxo

Four

Pam had almost forgotten what it was like, having the freedom and the time to be creative.  When she first started taking classes in Scranton she had been afraid she'd lost it but she found it hadn't disappeared.  She was rusty, no question, but still able to create something out of nothing when she wanted to.    

The exercises her professor had given them had her suddenly seeing the beauty in everything around her.  She'd read something once that said it took thirty days to create a habit.  As her own day thirty rolled around she found it to be absolutely true.

Monday she'd sketched an old fountain in the middle of the park, kicking off her flip flops to wade through the precarious water to see the stone carving in more detail.  Wednesday she'd gotten a crick in her neck from staring up at the sky, the buildings seeming to her like flowers in an overgrown garden, craning towards the sun.

She spent this rare Saturday morning alone at the Met with her set of pastels recreating a Renoir still life of a bowl of peaches, her fingers stained in a rainbow of colors when she'd finished.

Afterwards Pam wandered down Fifth Avenue, dodging the brigade of strollers ascending on Central Park.  She watched a couple passing by, holding hands and felt a tightening around her heart.  For the first time since she'd left Scranton, Jim wouldn't be coming to visit this weekend.  His car was in the shop, there was no easy way to get to New York by train and her car was sitting two hours away in her parents' driveway until she returned.  Reluctantly they finally admitted defeat.

She hoped all the walking she was doing would tire her out, since the best night's sleep she got all week were the two where he lay beside her.  She wondered if she had it in her to walk all the way to Brooklyn.   She hitched her bag higher on her shoulder and flexed her toes in her sneakers.  She decided she'd see how far she could go before she collapsed.

Pam missed Jim.  Not the way she had that first week, when she'd called him every other hour and begged him at night to come and pick her up and take her home, like a kid left at summer camp.  But she missed him all the same.  

She knew now that things would be different when she got back home in August.  She'd be different.  It had only been four weeks and she already was.  But she wasn't so different that everything had changed.    The things she wanted in her life, the life she wanted to have with Jim, that hadn't changed at all.

In what seemed like no time at all she was nearing Union Square and although she had put up quite a fight the lure of an air-conditioned subway car was just too great.   She descended the stairs, twisting her ring around on her finger as she did.  She rushed through the turnstile and just made the train, sliding into a seat a bit breathlessly.

By the time she climbed the two flights to her apartment her muscles ached.  She pushed open the door nearly giddy at the prospect of a cool shower.  Her sneaker slid over a FedEx envelope at her feet.  She grinned as she tore open the package, noting the address as she did.

Pam laughed out loud as the contents skidded across the floor, coming to rest under her nightstand.  A color cutout of Philly Jim stared up at her, complete with a guitar slung over his shoulder.  She propped him up on the table and sank into her overstuffed armchair to read the note Jim had included.

Neither rain, nor snow, nor sleet, nor cars in need of a fuel  filter change will keep me from seeing you this weekend.  Well, OK - not true - but I hope you're alright with spending some quality time with Philly Jim.  I believe you mentioned you wanted to get to know him better.  Take care of him.  He's used to living in a whole other city you know.  Oh and if you see Dwight Shelford around - let me know what he's up to.

I'll see you next week.   Call you later.

Love, Jim

She'd been dreading tonight, dreading this weekend.  She'd been trying to be brave but not really sure she'd be able to manage on her own.  It was clear now that no matter where she was Jim would be right there with her, even if just in spirit.  It was a marked change from last year, when it felt like he was a thousand miles away even if in reality he had been sitting just a few feet from her. 

Things were different now.

Grinning she padded to the bathroom, peeling off her sticky clothes as she went.  She showered quickly, throwing her damp hair up in a knot.  She slipped into the tee shirt Jim had left hanging on the hook on her bathroom door and walked back into the room, smiling wider as she caught sight of that ridiculous cut-out again.  And as she did she realized for the first time in four weeks that this little room felt almost like home.