Pam had spent most of her weekend getting over the hangover banging in her head after the Dundies. Roy was there when she got home, cutting his eyes at her as she dropped her keys and coat unceremoniously on the floor and tumbled onto the bed. She assumed he took her shoes off because she woke up the next morning with her skirt hiked up, pantyhose cutting off her circulation and blouse wrinkled. Why he hadn't undressed her is beyond her, but he was still speaking to her that morning. That was the most important thing.

When she got to work that morning, she was happy to see Jim said nothing of the kiss. Wait, was she happy he didn't mention it at all, or was she happy he wasn't upset about it? She hated that she had this internal battle brewing in her, when she had a fiance' she loved for years and she was getting married....one day.

Ding.

Pam looked over at Jim, wondering what Dwight did now, but a twinge of disappointment hit her as she read it was just one of Michael's forwards. He had been sending forwards all morning and Pam was this close to blocking him. He was harassing Jim and Dwight now, and talking about Monkey sex...

Pam was going to roll her eyes but she zoomed in on a slightly balding man creeping up behind Michael. Oh god, is that? Todd Packer? Dammit. She hated Todd Packer more than she hated this place. With his extremely sexist attitude, sick perverted twisted humor and the way Michael stood there and let him say or do whatever he wanted. He pulled at Michael's jacket and said something completely despicable like:

"What has two thumbs and likes to bone your mom? This guy!"

Jim rolls his eyes and Pam heard a soft ding.

Kill me b4 I kill him.

Hey Beesly, who had two thumbs and hates Todd Packer?? THIS GUY!

She couldn't even respond to poor Jim before Packer was right by him.

"What's up Halpert? Still queer?"

Michael seemed generally amused by the disrespect Packer showed Jim and Pam wanted nothing more than to staple stuff to his bald head. Jim just clenched his jaw and stared into the camera while Todd Packer did some crazy obscene gesture at him. Pam wondered if Packer went home every evening and ate his sad can of potted meat and crackers and wondered what cruel and nasty joke he could tell since he had no one in the world to love him.

Packer continued to tell one of his lewd jokes and Pam felt the need to wretch all over her desk. Michael kissed his ass more than Dwight kissed Michael's. She decided to tune him out after he mentioned something about banging a secretary.

She had no time for this, her mother was coming today. Roy had even washed his hair and finally put on that new sweater she bought him last year. She had a spiffy man waiting, her mom coming, and she had no time for the crap about to happen in here. She begged her mom not to meet her at work, maybe meet her at the cruddy gas station down the street that would be less embarrassing. But her mother insisted.

"I want to see what you do, Pam. Now hush up and tell me the directions."

Pam sat there and muddled over her faxes, with an occasional glance at the door. Earlier she told the AD during her talking head that her mother was visiting.

"Why am I so happy today? My mom is coming in to visit. Ah, she lives, like two hours away, and she doesn't have a cell phone. Which is cool, 'cause it's kind of adding some suspense to my day. And, I keep looking over at the door hoping she'll walk in."

She loved her mom. Next to Jim, her mom was her best friend. She was supportive and sweet, stern when necessary and Pam missed her tremendously. The move to Scranton hurt her, since she loved her moments with her mom, but it was just another thing on the list of things she had to give up.

Jim stood in the kitchen next to her, and she noted he was tall like a tree. A tree she could climb. Whoa...Pam, what is wrong with you today? "I really excited to meet your mom."

"You are?"

Pam nodded, munching on her chocolate bar. "I decided to show her around, she really want to meet everybody."

"Oh yeah?" Jim replied and she looked amused at him. He wanted to meet her mom. It was so sweet. She got that totally, because she wanted to meet his too. "Good. Cause I have a lot of questions."

"Oh really?"

Jim gave her a small smile. "Yeah. As a child, did Pam show any traits that would hint towards her future career as a receptionist?"

She couldn't help but laugh, hopefully that smile would last all day.

She sat at her desk, looking at the door again when Michael came out.

"Everyone?" Michael said. Oh Jesus what now? "Hello, everyone. Hi, uh,sorry to interrupt, I know you're all busy and the last thing you want is for a major interruption. But Toby has an announcement that he insists on making right now in the middle of the day, so take it away."

Toby looked like he was fighting the urge to roll his eyes. "Yeah, okay. Corporate would like us to do a five minute review of the company's sexual harassment policy, so I'll go over that later."

"I wish you luck Toby, I really do. But you are going to have a mutiny on your hands, and I just can't wait to see how you handle it."

Everyone stood still and stared. No one cared. Was it time to go home yet?

Toby did his presentation and Pam sat quietly through it. At least it wasn't Michael; the whole thing would be ridiculous. Jim said he was wondering if he could file sexual harassment charges on Dwight, seeing that Dwight made reference to his "gun show" all the time, and it made Jim feel cheap and tawdry. Pam had nearly spit out her soda at her desk when he said it. Now Toby was finishing up, and Pam wanted her mom here so that her day would be at least half way salvageable. Then she remembered...oh god, she's coming in here. And Michael's going to say something stupid, Kevin's going to leer at her mom, and Todd Packer might come back and try to grab her mom's ass. She raised her hand slowly.

"So remember, intent is irrelevant. And that's it...Pam?"

"Um, I just wanted to say, that, just, my mom is coming in today."

"Mmmmilf." Kevin replied and snickers. Pam rolled her eyes.

"Thanks Kevin. Anyway, she's coming in today and maybe just don't joke around about that stuff in front of her."

Toby nodded. "Great point."

Pam felt a bit of relief as Toby agreed with her, everyone should behave. She wouldn't want her mother to know she worked with a pack of rabid hyenas. Everyone was going back to their desks, when Michael came in carrying a blow up doll. Pam could only shake her head.

"Ah, no. I know, I know, it's good. It is not over; it is not over 'till it's over. Did he, ah, tell you everything? Obviously he didn't, because you all still look relatively happy. Albeit, bored. Do you realize what we're losing? Seriously?" Of course Michael was the only one fighting for the right to sexually harrass someone.

Pam put her head in her hands and Angela answered. "E-mail forwards."

They went back and forth which resulted in Michael saying a picture of Stanley's daughter was soft porn and how many co workers they banged or could have and all Pam wanted to do was kick something. Jim seemed oddly interested in the blow up doll and Pam wondered what he was thinking.

Suddenly Pam was yanked out of her thoughts by Michael's absurd statement.

"What if Pam...was a lesbian?"

What?! Michael continued. "What if she brought her ‘partner' into work? Would that be crossing the line?"

She watched Jim swivel around and stare at her, his face full of amusement. Only in your dirty little fantasies, Halpert.

Did he have fantasies about her?, she wondered.

Michael was on a roll. "What if they made out in front of everybody?"

Jim smiled wider. Pam wanted to die.

Toby shook his head. "Well that would be..."

Pam wished the ugly carpet would just swallow her alive. What next? Will her mom come in? To hear Michael accuse her of being a lesbian? Next thing she knew, Michael wanted her to come and french the blow up doll! Pam was mortified and Jim seemed to be thoroughly enjoying this. A wave of relief hit her when Michael Michael got distracted by something else and ended up watching Toby's video again with the warehouse guys. She sat at her desk wondering what she did to offend God and get this job. He gestured for Pam to come but Pam declined.

"Um, my mother's coming."

"That's what she sai-," Michael looked at the cameras and cleared his throat. "No, but, okay, well, suit yourself."

Ding. She should have known Jim Halpert wouldn't let the blow up doll thing go.

Your lesbian plastic girlfriend invaded my talking head.

She snorted and replied back.

The slut.

Ding.

You french your plastic lesbian lover with that mouth? Filthy.

Pam was a little disappointed when Jan walked in, she really hoped it was her mother. She was ready for this day to be over, or half way over, as Michael all ready ruined it. Jan had walked in just in time to hear Michael offend everyone, and she had a lawyer looking type with her. In a way Pam was glad, if Jan was here even for a little while, the office would be normal when her mom came.

Not so much. Todd Packer came back, Ryan muddling in behind him. Packer leaned against the counter, and Pam winced at the stench of corn chips and cheap cologne. "Don't ever let this little bitch drive you around town, we got lost for a half an hour."

She frowned. "I don't have any DUI's so I can drive myself, but thanks."

Jan obviously had gotten to Michael as he submerged defeated out of his office. He announced that sexual harassment would not be tolerated in the office, and Pam wondered if he knew that applied to him as well. Jim glanced over at her, and Pam noted that gleam again and she waited to see his genius in action.

"And, when we talk about things here, we must only discuss, ah, work associated things. And, uh, you can consider this my retirement from comedy." Michael stated. "In the future, if I want to say something funny, or witty, or do an impression, I will no longer, ever, do any of those things. "

Jim shifted in his seat. "Does that include, ‘that's what she said'?"

"Umm...hmm, yes."

"Wow, that is really hard," Jim replied, swiveling in his chair. Pam covered her mouth. Jim was taunting him, dangling the proverbial carrot. "Do you really think you can go all day long? Well, you always left me satisfied and smiling. So..."

Michael couldn't hold it in any longer. His perverted-ness wouldn't let him. "That's what she said!"

Jim gave a fist pump and Pam just chuckled to herself. Where would her day be without Jim? Jan seemed defeated in her attempt to control Michael's behavior and dragged him into his office. Bored, Pam started typing up some of Michael's notes when someone walked up behind her and surprised her.

"Um, hello."

"Oh my God!" She was so happy to see her mother, who looked good even for her age. She hugged her so tight she didn't want to let go.

"Finally made it." Her mom said, smiling. "This is all yours?"

Pam nodded. "Yeah, I'm in charge of this whole area." This is as good as it gets....sadly.

Michael of course walked out holding the blow up doll and tossed it in the hall. Pam and her mom just watched.  Her mom tried to catch her eye, but Pam didn't feel like explaining. How can you explain that?

Pam was showing her mom her desk. "This is where I used to keep my computer."

"Oh, right, right, I remember, with the pictures."

"Yeah, yeah, but I moved it. Yeah, but I, uh, I switched stuff around, because I actually needed, like, more room for organization, so..." Lies. She moved it so she can look up and see Jim.

Her mom gave her a knowing look. "Sure."

Pam's mom turned around to see Roy come in, wearing the outfit Pam had begged him to put on this morning. "Oh, there he is."

Pam watched them hug and for a second she felt like this was normal. This was her life. The why did it feel so heavy? Despite the craziness here, despite the fact Roy pissed her off the weekend before, she watched how her mom hugged her fiancé and it made her smile. Her mom flirted a bit with Roy and Pam watched the scene. She just felt...odd. Her mom turned back to her and smiled as Roy left.

"Ok Pam... So, which one is Jim?"

Pam turned beet red and glanced at Jim, who suddenly seemed to be grinning and concentrating on his work. Had he heard them? No, no...he was probably plotting on pranking Dwight, hence the pleased look on his face. "Mom!"

Her mom chuckled and Pam couldn't help but blush deeper. He mom gave her a knowing wink and Pam felt hot all of a sudden. Her mom teased her mercilessly during her calls home.

"Jim sounds like a great guy."

"Well did you ask Jim his opinion?"

"Jim seems to know you very, very well sweetheart."

She glanced back over to Jim, she swear he was smiling wider.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

She wanted to quit. Just get up one day and walk out the door without saying a word. No need for anything dramatic or crazy. No knocking stuff off her desk or yelling at Michael. Nope. Just get up, grab her purse and leave and never come back. No one would notice until the phone rang probably. No one except Jim. Well...maybe not even him anymore. Her morning wasn't that bad until she was graced with the job of transferring one of Jim's calls to his desk.

"Dunder Mifflin, this is Pam..." she frowns slightly at the high pitched voice on the other end. "Sure, can I ask who's calling?" Bitch. "Just a second."

She pressed the transfer button, letting go of the temptation to just "accidentally" disconnect the call. She glanced over at Jim holding the phone, with a smile wider than the whole outside, and she wanted nothing more than to just leave and never look back at Dunder Mifflin ever again.

The AD had beckoned her in the conference room a few minutes later to ask who was that that just called Jim. Pam hoped her look of disgust wasn't the reason why they had asked. Of course she was happy Jim had a frien- girl- someone.

"Katy, and Jim, met in the office. And now I guess they're like, going out, or dating, or something. And, uh...I don't know! You know, they're just, she calls him, and they...you know, I'm sorry, I feel like I'm talking really loud. Am I talking really loud?" She felt hot and the AD assured her she was fine but she felt like her voice carried across the room.

Apparently, Jim had a lunch date. Pam wondered if Katy would bring her big giant bag of purses along. She wondered did she sell wallets too, or did it just stop at cheap imitation purses?

She just shook it off and focused on her FreeCell game. Michael was giving Ryan an evaluation today and from the looks of it, he probably made Ryan very uncomfortable. Pam pondered why Michael had such a strong man-crush on Ryan. I mean Ryan was cute, no Jim, but cute nevertheless....oh god.  Did she just say Jim was cute? That's okay right, because he is your best friend? Right? She hated when she had thoughts like that, she was an engaged woman! To distract herself, she flipped her planner open and frowned. Roy had to take the truck to get serviced later today. Yeah, Roy, my fiance'.

Suddenly the alarm started beeping and Pam rolled her eyes. Great another stupid fire drill. She realized at that moment she hoped for a real fire to rampage through the building, causing total destruction and complete damage and everyone had to be relocated or find new jobs. Oh yeah that would be great.

Angela and Dwight started flipping out, saying everyone was going to die and Pam frowned. Don't toy with her happiness like that. She stood up and watched as Jim and Oscar walked out, seeing a blur of Michael pushing past and jetting it down the stairs. What a sad little man he was.

"This whole place is a tinder box, it is ready to blow!" Dwight screeched.

She finally walked slowly down the steps and outside, the light hitting her in the face. It was funny how dark and dismal it was inside to her, but the sun outside made her feel warm and free. She smiled up at it and walked towards the curb where the other employees were gathering. Jim stood there with his hands in his pockets, and he gazed down at her.

"Glad you made it out Beesly. It was touch and go for a minute there."

She smirked. "I know, thank god I have super human powers."

"Which is what exactly?"

"Duh..." Pam huffed. "I'm made of water!"

He looked amused. "Yes, thank god."

They smiled at each other for a minute before Jim cleared his throat. They both noticed everyone was just wondering around the parking lot, looking extremely bored. "Okay, you know what? I think I'm going to be, uh, setting the agenda here. Okay? Can everybody gather up please? Important announcement, very important announcement. I think this is a perfect opportunity for all of us to participate in some really intense, psychologically revealing conversations. So we're going to be playing, desert island. Um, who would you do?"

"And, um...?" he turned to Pam for help.

"Would you rather?"

Jim beamed. "Yes! Would you rather. Would you rather? Is our third game."

The fire truck arrived and Jim turned to pat one of the guys on the back. Apparently Jim told her later, that guy played ball with Jim on Saturdays. She forgot he had a life outside the office sometimes.

"Okay, so, three books on a desert island...Angela." Jim replied, turning back to the game.

"The Bible," she said and Pam noticed everyone stared at her waiting to see if there was more.

Stanley spoke up. "That's one book, you got two others."

"A Purpose Driven Life."

Jim nodded. "Nice...Third book?"

Angela looked curtly at him. "No."

Jim let it slide and moved on to Phyllis who offended Angela with mention of the Da Vinci Code. Pam smiled and wondered what books she would take. Definitely one fiction, for imagination, maybe one on desert island survival, and a cheesy romance novel. If she was trapped on a desert island alone, she needed something...right? She wanted to ask Jim if a sketchbook counted when Dwight began saying what crazy things he would bring to the island.

She didn't even need to know what Jim had in his head. He glanced over at her,and she couldn't  help but cackle at the mess that is Dwight.

Jim let Dwight ramble on about Harry Potter and something else and then the game seemed stalled. "Okay, I thought people read more books. DVDs! Five movies, what would you bring to the island?

Pam watched Dwight raise his hand but Jim ignored him. "Yes, Meredith?"

"Legends of the Fall, My Big Fat Greek Wedding, Legally Blond, Bridges of Madison County..."

The AD had pulled them in front of the fire truck and inquired about the game.

Jim just shook his head. "Wow."

Pam had to laugh. "Legends of the Fall." Well Brad Pitt was hot.

But Jim continued to shake his head in disbelief. "Wow. Bridges of Madison County, Legally Blond, these movies are just-"

Pam crumpled her nose. "Well, I kind of like Legally..."

She watched as Jim stood up straight and casted her a look of bemusement. "Wait, wait, wait. Pam, no. Do you understand? The, the game is desert island movies, not guilty pleasure movies. Desert island movies are the movies you are going to watch for the rest of your life. Forever! " He gave a look to the camera. "Unforgivable."

Pam was grateful to have Jim. He made everything so light and free and funny. He was the perfect escape from a gloom day. "I take it back."

"Unforgivable." Jim looked ashamed.

She wanted to smack him. Or kiss him...stop. "I take it back!"

He smiled at her. "Good."

They rejoined the circle and Pam was standing in the shade beside Jim. "Pam, get us back into it. Five movies, go ahead. "

She scrunched her nose. She loved movies and sometimes, when Roy didn't need her to help him move some relative's furniture, she would rent a few videos and veg-out and watch movies. "Okay, um, Fargo, um, Edward Scissorhands, Dazed and Confused..."

Jim gave a big smile. "Oh, definitely in my top five."

Pam bit back her own grin. "Yes, in my top three, so suck it."

She couldn't believe she told Jim to suck it. It was laden with sexual tension, she was sure. He just glared at her in awe "What?"

She continued. "Breakfast Club. Um, The Princess Bride and-"

"Okay that's five." Jim interrupted her. Pam tried to say more but Jim wouldn't let her and moved on to Dwight, who was kicking a sign. Weirdo.

"Alright, let's move on. Let's move on to the main event, who would you do?"

"Present company excluded?" Kevin asked.

Jim gave a shrug. "Um, not neccessaril-"

"Pam." Kevin said with much conviction.

Oscar also said. "Pam."

What? What am I? A piece of meat?, she thought. She turned to Jim to see him get flustered and red, like she was. "Um...okay. Ah, you know what? Maybe I'll, I'll finish explaining the rules, let's, let me explain it first, and then-"

R.E.M.'s "Everybody Hurts" blasted into Pam's ears and she looked at Jim. Dwight was freaking suicidal. Jim met her eyes and nodded.

"Yeah, so we'll get right, you know what? I'll be right back. Stanley, you're taking over for me buddy. I'll be right back."

Jim wagged his eyebrow at Pam as they approached Dwight's car and she smiled.

"Dwight?" Jim said softly. Dwight didn't respond, he just turned up the music. It looked like he was crying. Jim looked concerned, well not really. "Dwight. Come on buddy, use words."

Dwight turned the music off and kept staring into space. "Why didn't I go to business school?"

Pam and Jim lock eyes. What the hell is he talking about? "Who goes to business school?"

"The temp."

Pam sensed that Dwight was insanely jealous of all the attention Michael focused on Ryan. Even if it made Ryan want to go out of a window. Dwight did all he could to make Michael notice him. It would be sad if it wasn't so hysterical. Softly Pam replied, "You know, I bet Ryan thinks to himself, I wish I were a volunteer sheriff on the weekends."

"He doesn't even know that I do that."

"You should tell him."

That seemed to depress Dwight more. "Oh yeah Pam, right. That's going to help things, just talk it out. I hope the war goes on forever and Ryan gets drafted!"

Pam could see Jim was cracking up. He was doing his damnedest not show it but she could feel his lean body shake with laughter beside her own.

"You know what you should do?" Jim almost guffawed out. " You should quit! And then, that would stick it to both of them."

At that moment Pam could have died happy. They egged him to quit but he refused and the pair walked away barely holding in the humor of it all.

"Hey you guys, what's going on?" Roy's voice entered her ears. Her fiance'. She watched Jim dort of tense up, as he did whenever ROy came around, but his smile, though slacked a bit, remained.

She wanted to laugh, just laugh but he would never understand, never.

They all stood around Stanley, still playing games. "Okay, it's called, who would you do?"

"Mm, Roy? Roy? Who would you do Roy?" Asked Michael.

"Uh..." he paused. Pam gave a small smile. It's okay baby, we're engaged. They all know. "Oh, I got it, uh, what's the name of that uh, tight ass, uh, Christian, uh, chick. The, uh, the blond?"

Angela snapped her head out. "My name is Angela."

Roy smiled and gave a wave. "Hey, Angela, Roy. Nice to meet you."

Pam flushed red and wanted to strangle Roy. How could he?! Angela?! Of all people?! Phyllis would have been a better choice! Or how about your fiancé, idiot!

Michael rubbed his hands together. "Aaaalright, who's next, who's next, who's next, who's next? Jim? You're next. Who would you do?"

Pam snapped out of her pity party to stare at Jim. Did he think of her like that? Did he think of her the way she sometimes thought of him? Of course not, he was her best friend, a gentleman, he was...Jim.She noticed his face turned redder and he shoved his hands into his pockets.

"Ahhhhh...uhhh...Ah, Kevin, hands down." He replied causing everyone, even Pam to laugh. She wanted to smack herself for thinking he'd choose her. "Yeah. He's really got that teddy bear thing going on, and afterwards, we could just watch bowling."

Michael, of course, ruined the mood by suggesting he would molest Ryan. They all scattered and Pam found herself surrounded by the ladies.

"Jim." Phyllis said smiling. Pam always guessed Phyllis liked Jim, he had that cuteness about him and he was a really sweet guy. Why not Jim? Why.not. Jim?

"Definitely, definitely, Jim." Kelly replied as who she would do.

Phyllis nudged Pam. "Come on, Pam."

"How about you Pam?"

Pam stuttered. Not Jim. Can't be Jim. No. No. No.... "Um, Oscar's kind of cute."

"Yeah, I like Oscar." Phyllis said hesitantly, like that wasn't the answer she was expecting.

"Ooh, Toby." Pam through out. Anyone but Jim. No Jim. Jim off limits.

A few minutes later a car pulls into the parking lot and Jim smiled his brilliant smile and walked over. Pam couldn't help but cringe as he greeted Katy.

"Hey!"

"How are you?" he beamed.

Pam didn't want to watch as Katy grabbed his tie. She felt like she wanted to throw up or run and kick Katy in the face. She was sure Katy was acting like the whorey sex kitten she is -whoa, channeling Angela is not good!

Katy got out the car and she walked with Jim towards the group and Pam saw him grab her hand. Her heart stopped at bit.

Jim spoke up. "Ladies and gentlemen, gather around, we have one more participant, come on, be polite. Be polite. Desert island, Five movies, go."

"Okay, um, first, Legally Blond." Katy replied, and Pam wanted to yank her red salon styled hair out of every socket.

"HA!" Pam laughed. She gave Jim a knowing look.

Later in her talking head, she lied her ass off.

"I forgot what a super, nice, girl Katy is. And just, good for Jim. They are so cute together. And, um, what an adorable car."

In fact she hated her, even though she knew nothing about her. She was all wrong for Jim. Wronger than anyone she'd ever seen. And she didn't know why. He was her best friend and he deserved better right? Right? The game ended with Jim announcing he was leaving with Katy and he walked away. Pam frowned as she watched him walk to the stupidly cute car with the annoying red head who just won't call his extension directly. She watched him laugh and smile at something Katy said and her heart broke a little.

Pam turned and saw Roy. She pulled his neck towards her and kissed him. She had to remind herself that Roy was home. He was her heart....right?