A/N: See? Told you I wouldn't be slow on this one. I know it's a little dull right now, but things are moving. I promise.
Disclaimer: Not mine.
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Karen smiles and nods at Stanley, who gruffly agrees with her about something. Pam stops watching their conversation immediately, because Karen’s standing up and coming towards her end of the office, but still. Karen’s appearance makes her feel a little dejected. She can’t help but compare, which makes her feel like high school just hit her like a bus again. But, you know. She’s decided she shouldn’t do any of that, if she can help it.
Pam also decided about a week ago that if Karen and Jim were going to be dating, she couldn't just sit up at her stupid reception desk and be jealous of Karen. She was, of course, but she had to think of ways to counteract that. Mostly because she missed Jim. So, naturally (god...), she decided to be, maybe, friends with Karen? Or at least make it look like she was nice. Which she figured she was, really, but it was the first time she’d ever felt a shade of red on her like this. Snarky, maybe. And she wasn’t totally sure what being nice would do, but she did know that the doing the opposite would most likely push Jim very far away from her. So, the opposite of Jim being very far away from her…
"Hey," Pam says, raising her brow and shifting in her seat a little, as Karen approaches the copier.
Karen looks around for a second, back to Pam, silently making sure she's talking to her. Pam’s not totally sure why she does this, like they’ve never talked before. She’s actually talked to her quite a few times, which is surprising, given that Karen should be the one person she’s allowed to irrationally hate. Because she might think Karen’s another sane one in the office.
"Yeah," Pam nods with a smile that feels largely fake. "So, what's the matter with Jim? He says he has a fever?"
She raises her brow again as if she's feigning interest, which is just stupid, she thinks. Really, she knows he doesn't call in for any reason at all, so it has to be some fever, and it does make her a little nervous. Also, though, is this really the way to get to know your crush's girlfriend?
Okay, so that could be a headline from a Cosmo.
Pam refrains from rolling her eyes at herself, since she’s still watching for Karen’s reaction. Karen's eyes go wide as she taps the buttons on the copier and waits. She slides the paper from the tray and shakes her head rapidly, the hair shining and shining and swinging on her shoulders. "I, uh, I don't know. I'm sure he's fine." Her lips roll into her mouth with those wide eyes and she just shrugs and heads back to her desk.
All Pam can think is awkward and that maybe Karen can see right through her. Like, back off my boyfriend awkward see right through her. He's mine and my hair is, yes, naturally this beautiful.
Pam nods to herself and realizes she's been perched on the edge of her seat, her balled fists resting on either side of her legs. And her feet are pressed together and removed from her shoes, toes curled up in the tights she wears. So, basically, she looked ridiculous from head to toe during that exchange.
That's... great. And she continues to miss him. Her mouth falls open, unsure of what to say, especially when the camera lens is looking at her. Her glance darts over to Jim's desk, roaming over the blank white of his blotter and the gleam of the wood on his desk. The cameraman follows her gaze.
She rolls her eyes and picks up the phone. When she pretends to make a phone call, she actually just listens to his voicemail again.
Hey, this is, mmm, this is Jim. I don't think I can make it in. I have a fever and just don't feel... great, so I, yeah, I probably won't make it in. Hoping it'll be better tomorrow or, for sure, by Monday. But. Yeah. Let Toby know for me and I'll be there again soon.
She replays it once again, listening to the space between all the words, like she can read his temperature through the earpiece. He sounds worn down. He does sound sick. She imagines him curled up on the couch, with a mound of Kleenex scattered around him and bad television in front of him. Maybe a large bowl of hot soup in his lap.
Hey, this is, mmm, this is Jim. I don't think I can make it in. I have a fever and just don't feel... great, so I, yeah, I probably won't make it in. Hoping it'll be better tomorrow or, for sure, by Monday. But. Yeah. Let Toby know for me and I'll be there again soon.
It's a blessing, she thinks, that the camera can follow her all day long and follow her eyes every time she looks over at Jim's space in obvious longing, but they can't see or hear her do this. It's not a conversation, so she doesn't have to answer back. She sets the receiver back in its place and leaves her hand on top of it for a moment. She blinks and pretends like it’s just secretarial work; listening to all of the phone messages that weren’t really for her in the first place. Jim’s wasn’t either, she knows this, but she figures she’ll be listening to it again throughout the day. He hardly talks to her anymore anyway, and at least this way she can listen to his voice and, you know, there’s nothing to analyze. There’s nothing to watch between Jim and Pam. The cameras are across the room the next time she picks up the phone when it’s not ringing, setting it against her ear. And they just have no idea.
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Okay, I know it's slow moving. Things will get going in the next chapter, posted tomorrow, most likely.
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© 2006-2023 More Than That | Skin created by Kali