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October 2, 2014
Hello again!
As of this moment it has been more than two months since our family packed up and moved to Austin. Although we have since adjusted quite well here and life has become almost routine in our usual chaotic sort of way, we miss Scranton – we miss our friends, we miss our family, and Jim and I miss spending our days together. This is not to say that we aren’t happy here. We really are. But for whatever reason, we’ve been catching ourselves reminiscing about our old life.
The night before, while we were lying in bed, Jim couldn’t help but bring up our friend Dwight. For those of you who haven’t watched the documentary, Dwight is… Man, how can I even begin to describe him. There are so many different words and descriptions that pop into my head –eccentric, authority-loving, beet farmer, paper salesman, bears, mustard colored shirts, Battlestar Galactica – but each of them seems to only peer past the opening pages of the novel that is Dwight K. Schrute.
Jim said, “Remember the time when we convinced Dwight it was Friday when it was actually Thursday?”
“Yes,” I chuckled. “But I think the speech tips you gave him was the best. Seeing him bang his fists and yell was priceless.”
“BLOOD ALONE MOVES THE WHEELS OF HISTORY!” Jim intoned in Dwight’s dictatorial voice.
“Shhh… You’re going to wake up the kids.”
Our laughter soon subsided as nostalgia slowly tiptoed around us. Nostalgia itself is a funny concept – optimism facing the wrong direction, almost. Change is good; change is bad; tomorrow can’t come fast enough; slow tomorrow down. There is an inconsistency here.
Jim pulled me close and whispered words from Dwight’s speech in my ear, “We must never acquiesce, for it is together...”
I looked at him and understood the underlying meaning of what he was trying to say. So, I finished “…That we prevail!”
The kids are doing great. In the beginning Cece was a bit apprehensive but now she’s probably questioning why we didn’t move here sooner. Because of the prolonged summer weather, they got more than their fill of sun, swimming pools, ice cream treats, trips to the zoo, sprinkler fun in the backyard, and all of the other summertime fun you can think of! We also made the trip to the beach, which we hadn’t done in a while. Needless to say, they loved it, they wore us out, and now they wear us out every day asking when we can go back.
“Can we go to the beach today?” Cece asked last Saturday.
“But it’s raining, Sweetie,” I told her.
“That’s good mommy, I don’t need to wet the sand for the castles!” She replied blissfully.
“But then we’ll get all wet,” I reasoned.
“Mommy, we go in the water, we get wet anyways!”
I looked at her and just shook my head in bewilderment. How can I argue with that?
Speaking of Cece… She has recently started pre-K and she loves just about everything to do with going to a big girl school. Her weekly reports are always very positive, except the teachers have occasionally mentioned she spends more time absorbed in solo projects than her classmates. One of her teachers even suggested setting up play dates so she could “break out of her shell.” Although this idea seems sound, I can’t pressure my daughter to be something she’s not.
Some parents put so much pressure on their kids to be sociable when that is the exact opposite of what they need. They think if they don’t teach their kids to run with the pack they will start on a loner trajectory that will leave them sad and friendless for life. I could go on and on, but I won’t bore you with my ranting…sorry, sometimes I can’t help myself. I just don’t want Cece’s timid personality to overshadow the fact that she is an extremely smart, silly, and happy little girl. She’s not a loner. In fact, when she is given enough time to warm up, she is downright chatty.
I don’t care if her teachers are not content with her B-list social status. As long as Cece doesn’t mind, we are okay. As a matter of fact, Cece‘s only grievance so far is the 30 count rule at the swing set. I guess each kid on the swings at recess has to count to 30, and then let the next kid go after that. Obviously, that is not a popular rule with anyone. So if that’s her only problem, I think she’s going to make it out okay.
Speaking of making out okay, I met a mom in Cece’s ballet class who is a marketing consultant for a local art gallery here in Austin. When I mentioned I painted murals she told me the gallery owner wanted to expand her business. She gave me her information and told me to get in contact with her. I was so eager I called her that same afternoon. We met the next day and I pitched the idea of merging my mural art business with her gallery and she loved it. She even invited me to attend this exclusive artist retreat in New Mexico. I don’t know what I will be doing there exactly, but I’m very excited.
I was beginning to wonder if I was ever going to ever find a job. I still haven’t received a single reply from the companies I submitted my resume to, which is a little rude if you ask me. At least have the courtesy to tell me no. Looking back, I’m glad they didn’t because it prompted me to reach out and find my own way.
So my time at home with the kiddos is almost coming to an end. As I mentioned on my last blog, I very much enjoy staying at home with them. And in a way I will still be home. I’ll be my own boss, which is completely surreal to someone whose been a receptionist for most her adult life. If 5 years ago someone told me that I would own an art business, I would have flat-out exclaimed, “You're crazy!”
It should now go without saying (though I’ll say it anyway) – Jim has been amazing these past two months. Although his job is very demanding at times, he is still very much present in our lives. He was my biggest cheerleader when I was moping around trying finding a job. He was the one that encouraged me to turn my art into a mural business. He believes in me wholeheartedly and that is an incredible feeling. Pretty words strung into sentences can’t capture my love and appreciation for him.
In a few days Jim and I will be celebrating our fifth wedding anniversary. And there are a lot of reasons to celebrate. We have just come off a year of heavy focus on what was most important in our lives –family – and now we find ourselves in that place, where our marriage was never more alive. An achievement we are proud of and we are looking to the future with more excitement than the time since we said our “I do’s.” We struggled, we pushed ourselves, we tried every little trick in the book, and we pushed, pushed, and pushed. And after all that effort we find ourselves exactly where we envisioned we would be when we first began. And it feels good, really really good… great even. And that’s definitely a reason to celebrate.
Jim has taken this Friday and Monday off to stay with the kids so that I can go to the retreat. I’ll be back Sunday night, but he insisted we would need a whole day together to catch up after being apart for three days. While I’m gone, he said that in addition to moping, he will drive the kids to the beach, since they’ve been asking relentlessly to go back. He hasn’t told them yet, which he won’t til the day of, otherwise they will be asking how many sleeps until the beach.
Alright, I’ve been postponing packing for the retreat long enough. My little guy will soon wake up from his nap and then I will have to go pick up Cece from school. I’m amazed at how fast time flies. Here I’m talking about picking up my kid from school when just a few years ago I was changing her diaper. Although life with a toddler and a preschooler should be easier, it’s not. Rather, the challenges have changed. Gone are the sleepless nights, hello mega-attitude and meltdowns from two little beings trying to find their place in the world. Gone are the days of bottle feeding and burping, hello knocked over milk cups, protests over what’s for dinner, food thrown across the table, and ginormous messes left at the dinner table…and the dinner floor…and the dinner clothes…and the dinner hands and faces…and so on and so forth.
But all things considered, I am excited about all of the adventures that are in store for us.
Together we will prevail.
Love,
Pam
