MorganLaFey: I need your advice on something as a man
WScranton8: you’re a man now? Congratulations, I know that transition is a difficult one.
MorganLaFey: you know what I mean
MorganLaFey: I need your advice on something because you are a man
WScranton8: ok, ok
WScranton8: what do you need?
MorganLaFey: are all men just a step away from gorillas?
MorganLaFey: I mean, are they all just giant balls of macho competitiveness if you scratch the surface?
WScranton8: …kinda?
WScranton8: like, I hate to paint with a broad brush
WScranton8: (that’s your job :-P)
WScranton8: but I think so? like, most guys do like to compete
MorganLaFey: (no, it’s not my job sadly)
MorganLaFey: ugh
MorganLaFey: I get that, I really do, but do they have to do the chest-thumping me-vs-you thing while they do it?
WScranton8: oh yes, that’s very important
WScranton8: scientific studies have revealed that each chest thump improves peak athletic performance by 12.3%
WScranton8: so the chest thumping is very important
MorganLaFey: what studies?
WScranton8: scientific ones
WScranton8: very real, very legitimate scientific ones
MorganLaFey: sure
WScranton8: I’m hurt you don’t believe me, Morgan. I really thought we had a trust thing going on here.
MorganLaFey: I mean, I trust you
WScranton8: about as far as you can throw me? ;-)
MorganLaFey: no, definitely farther
MorganLaFey: this is a desktop after all
MorganLaFey: I could probably throw you like a foot
WScranton8: I’m gonna bet you couldn’t throw the real me any further than that anyway
MorganLaFey: oh, you wanna bet?
MorganLaFey: come over here and say that, pilgrim
WScranton8: would if I could
WScranton8: and nice John Wayne reference
MorganLaFey: *bows*
MorganLaFey: and it sounds to me like someone’s getting competitive and chest-thumpy over there
WScranton8: what can I say, you bring out the competitor in me
WScranton8: and you’re the one who wanted to make it a bet
WScranton8: so I think we have definitive proof this chest thumping competition isn’t just a man thing ;-)
MorganLaFey: never said it was
MorganLaFey: just said asked if all guys do it :-P
WScranton8: well, I think we can safely say yes to that one
MorganLaFey: damn
MorganLaFey: I was hoping that you’d tell me there was some small tribe in the Amazon or something where that’s not an issue
MorganLaFey: and I could move there and live like a queen
WScranton8: I mean, I could still tell you that
MorganLaFey: no, no, we’ve already established your credibility over here is hanging by a thread ;-)
WScranton8: ouch
WScranton8: but you totally deserve to become an Amazon queen
WScranton8: which, for the record, would make the chest-thumping a lot easier
MorganLaFey: why’s that?
WScranton8: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Amazons
WScranton8: the Amazons were super aggressive and supposedly cut one breast off to make shooting a bow easier
WScranton8: coincidentally also making chest-thumping easier
WScranton8: or is it a coincidence? *DUN DUN DUN*
MorganLaFey: dork
MorganLaFey: anyway I didn’t say “Amazons” I said “the Amazon”
MorganLaFey: big difference
MorganLaFey: your little wikipedia page even says so, the Amazons were nowhere near South America
WScranton8: now who’s the dork? Geography nerd ;-)
MorganLaFey: just because I care about what continent something happened on…
WScranton8: or didn’t happen on
MorganLaFey: or didn’t happen on, precisely
MorganLaFey: does not make me a geography nerd :-P
WScranton8: no, but last week’s Countries of the World game did
MorganLaFey: lol, fair point
WScranton8: :-P
WScranton8: anyway, why the sudden interest in male competitiveness?
MorganLaFey: oh, just the boyfriend again
MorganLaFey: he always has to win, and he does not take losing well
MorganLaFey: so I always have to pump up his ego after he loses at something, even something minor
MorganLaFey: even when it’s against our friends or family
WScranton8: that sucks
WScranton8: I’m sorry you have to play cheerleader
WScranton8: but at least he cares about your opinion?
MorganLaFey: I guess so
MorganLaFey: not sure if it’s me specifically though or if I’m just closest. And I’m not really the cheerleader type, you know?
MorganLaFey: sorry, I shouldn’t be dumping all this on you
WScranton8: it’s ok
WScranton8: I’m sorry you’re feeling this way
WScranton8: and you may not have been a cheerleader, but you’re a great bringer of cheer
WScranton8: if that helps any
MorganLaFey: it does, thanks
WScranton8: you’re welcome
WScranton8: so, any big plans for the weekend?
MorganLaFey: I did have some, but now I have to work
MorganLaFey: you?
WScranton8: same
WScranton8: or rather, I did, but my boss decided we’re all going to get fired anyway so we might as well not
MorganLaFey: oooh, ouch
MorganLaFey: I wish my boss would have a change of heart like that, but definitely not for that reason
WScranton8: yeah
WScranton8: it sucks
WScranton8: but anyway, trivia tomorrow? To help you feel better after work?
MorganLaFey: sounds good
WScranton8: 7pm Eastern? I hear there’s a 19th century game on then.
MorganLaFey: it’s a date
