He was such a little bitch sometimes. Once, when he was little, he peed his pants when his brother Jonathan locked him in a dark closet. He never forgot how scared he was as he banged on the door and pissed himself. He'd have to punch Jonathan when he sees him for Thanksgiving. Fucker.

But that's how he felt yesterday when he heard her voice as the elevator doors closed. And while no urine was involved, Jim was unable to move as her eyes burned into his and then the doors closed. He was in such a daze that when he hit the lobby floor, the guy getting on the elevator cleared his throat to get Jim's attention so he could get off.

Before he knew it, he clutched his bag and jetted to the parking deck towards his Corolla. Of course the stupid keys were mocking him by all looking alike, and his hands were shaking. So he stepped away from the car and stood straight, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath.

Get it together, Halpert.

He saw her. Oh god, she saw him. And he ran.

How the fuck did this happen?

Easy Jim. You've been running from her for a while. Booking vacations half way across the world, moving to Stamford, and now...add literally jumping in an elevator to escape her.

Jim looked down at his keys and unlocked the door, stepping inside his modest car, and gripping the steering wheel tightly. How could she affect him so much in mere seconds? Because she was Pam and he loved her more than anything in this world. No matter how many times he told himself he hadn't. She was here, she was right in front of him and he let the door shut in her face. Fucking coward.

Jim ran his open palms all over his flustered face and groaned bitterly. Why did it have to be this way, like he never had a relationship before, like he never broken someone's heart or has his broken before? Because he had. He'd loved and been loved back, he'd been rejected and rejected others as well. But this haunted him every day like nothing else he'd ever dealt with. Not just Pam's rejection of him, but the stupid feelings he had that refused to die.

He tried everything to get rid of them, dating other women, flirting, drinking, porn...nothing worked. And he knew why...because none of that compared to her. Her lips smashing against his, her hands in his hair, the way she smelled and how soft she felt against him.

"Jesus!" he shouted and slammed his open hand against his steering wheel in frustration.

A knock on his window made him jump.

"Jim?"

He turned slowly to see Jan peering in his car window, her brow furrowed. Slowly, he turned the key to activate battery power and let down the window.

"Oh hey Jan."

"Are you alright? Josh told me you were leaving," she gave him a once over look and Jim paled. Did she see him freaking out just now?

"Uh, um...yeah I'm fine. Well I'm a bit sick, and I didn't want to give it to anyone in the office, so Josh let me, uh, go home," he blurted out.

Jan nodded slowly. "Okay, well...uh yes, go home and feel better and hopefully we'll see you tomorrow."

"Yeah, uh...yes. Thanks."

Jan smiled and walked away and Jim let out that deep breath he had sucked in.  He drove home and took the the longest hottest shower he could to relax his muscles, but it didn't help at all. And after an hour of staring at his phone to see if she would call...he downed more Nyquil and begged for sleep to take him.

So when the morning came, he stood groggily in front of a mirror, staring at his best white button down shirt and his favorite blue tie in his hand, cursing himself. He could call in sick today, but he had used up all his sick days. He still had personal days though...but it would be a bitch if he needed them later for real reasons. He wasn't ready to face her today either, and maybe if he passed out in the lobby, he could escape it today too.

But instead he got in the Corolla and drove slowly to work, went up the elevator, and stepped into his office.

Andy glanced up. "Oh, how was your day off? Slacker."

Jim smirked. "I feel much better this morning Andy. Thank you for your concern." Jim  sat down at his desk. Andy rolled his eyes and already he felt a bit better. Karen peeked from around her computer.

"Yesterday was scary. I've been assigned to have Dwight shadow me. Dwight's the guy you told me was like..." she nodded towards Andy.

Jim winced. "Oh...sorry. No. He's worse than..." Jim nodded towards Andy's back. "Same insanity, different methods."

Karen frowned. "Shit."

Jim logged in and noticed he didn't see anyone from Scranton on the floor. He was thankful for that because this calm facade was failing him miserably.

Josh came out his office and clapped Jim on the back. "Halpert. Morning. Better?"

Jim bit his lip and nodded. "Uh yeah...and where is, ya know, everybody?"

"Oh, they are on a tour of the building. Safety issues. That Dwight guy seemed very interested in that. I think Bill the security guy wants to mace him. Hey, that Todd Packer guy didn't show up this morning-"

"He's probably passed out drunk somewhere, laid up with a hooker, or a dead body in a morgue." Jim said simply.

Josh stood there and blinked several times. "Well damn...anyway, so you got Ryan as a shadow."

Jim felt more pressure rise off of him. "Cool."

Josh walked away and Jim went to focus back on his computer when the elevator doors opened and the Scranton crew began stepping out.

Before he could duck and hide, Michael spotted him. "Jimbo! Look everyone it's Jimbo!"

Dwight looked red in the face, Ryan gave a wave, Angela smirked, and Michael briskly walked over to his desk. But the only one he focused on was the curly haired woman standing near the elevator, hesitating to move with the group.

Her cheeks grew rosy and he could tell she didn't know what to do. She clutched her binder against her chest and shuffled her feet.

Jim only broke eye contact as Michael clapped him hard on the back.

"Jimmy! Heard you were sick yesterday. You missed one huge part-tay!"

Jim darted his eyes from Pam to Michael and then back to Pam before finally focusing on Michael. "Uh yeah...sorry about that. Hey, it's great to have you guys here."

Michael leaned over and loudly whispered. "I brought Pam along. She's going to be here until she has her internship next in about 8 months. So ya know..."

Jim pretended not to see Michael wink and just bobbed his head slowly. "Uh...sooo...what happened to the rest of the branch?"

Michael sighed heavily. "Well they will be floating for a few months and I think Oscar and Kevin will be transferred here later. I did like a whole complex system to pick who I was allowed to bring up here-"

"He put our names in hat." Angela muttered.

Jim tried not to laugh and his eyes flicked back to Pam, who had slowly made her way to stand the farthest away from his desk but still with the group.

She was refusing to look at him, and he felt like a complete ass for not responding to her yesterday.

Dwight stood next to Jim. "Question. Is Josh a good boss?"

Michael frowned when he heard it. "Josh is not your boss, I am. And to have you know, I am still better than him anyday, branches closing or not."

Jim broke his staring again. "Hello Dwight. I missed you. Did you bring your bobble heads? And yeah Josh is a pretty nice guy."

Dwight frowned. "No, Michael is right, no one is better than him. And you've probably been brainwashed to believe otherwise now."

Jim smiled. "Yes. I have. I'm like a Stepford slave for Dunder Mifflin. And now...it's your turn."

Dwight jumped back and Josh came out to start dispersing them to their guides. Dwight sat with Karen and Ryan took a seat with Jim. Andy got Michael since Josh had to leave for the day. Jim tried not to watch as Josh led Pam away towards reception, and he definitely tried not to hop across the desk and kill his boss as he watched him put his hand on the small of her back.

He bit the inside of his cheek and turned to see Ryan staring at him.

"Hey Ryan. Good to see you."

"Yeah man, wassup?" Ryan asked, tilting his head.

"Nothing, uh, where are you guys staying until you can find a place out here?"

Ryan snorted. "Super 8. But we're supposed to get moving packages. This was such short notice. Dwight pitched a fit about leaving his beet farm, but he would follow Michael to the ends of the earth."

"Too bad he won't find an edge to fall off of." Jim muttered. "Where's Kelly?"

"Oh, um...Kelly's coming in 2 weeks. See they slit us up. But most of the office is coming, some are just floating until they see if Michael can behave himself."

"Oh god that sucks. Job security based on Michael's behavior." Jim winced.

"That's why I posted my resume on Monster." Ryan said simply. He leaned over. "So...is this awkward for you?"

Jim dropped his head. "You have no idea. How-how has she been?"

Ryan sat straight up again and looked at Jim's screen. "She's okay while working now. The first few months were...she cried alot.  But I think it's been a hard year for her."

Jim felt his heart get heavier. "Yeah. Me too. Look, thanks man."

"No problem." Ryan stated. "So, let's sell some paper."

Jim did a good job focusing on training Ryan for a few hours. They kept the conversation light though after he asked about Pam. Suddenly Karen jumped up and stomped over to his desk.

"I want to trade."

Jim and Ryan stared up at her, her eyes red, her arms folded across her chest. She looked furious.

"What-why?" Jim asked.

"Because he's driving me crazy." She hissed, pointing at Dwight who was focusing hard on her screen. "He criticized everything I told him, he told me I was his inferior, he keeps talking about beets for god sakes."

Jim let a laugh slip and Ryan choked his back. "I'm sorry, Karen. But I've dealt with it for years. No way."

"Jim." she pouted.

"No. Ask Andy."

Karen shook her head. "Andy and Michael are getting along. Andy said Michael is his new BFF, whatever the fuck that means."

"Uh Karen," Dwight called over to her. "I've created a spreadsheet to better track your sales. The one you had was an absolute mess. I just deleted it."

"I'm going to kill him." she growled. "Jim. Please."

"I have no objections to that." Jim said cheerfully.

Ryan burst out laughing and Andy and Michael whipped around.

"What's so funny?" Michael asked.

"Nothing. Nothing at all. Ryan was coughing." Jim replied quickly.

Karen huffed back to her desk and Jim shook his head. Ryan just snorted. "Hey you want to take a break?"

Ryan nodded and Jim got up and walked to the breakroom with him. Ryan said he was going to the restroom and Jim started pouring himself some much needed caffeine. Today wasn't too bad, he actually liked having Ryan as a distraction from the obvious. He couldn't help but flash back to her standing by the elevator, lingering there while everyone else flocked to his desk. She looked...she looked...like heaven to him but yet she was also the reason he felt like he was in hell. She held the key to his heart and she refused to unlock it.

She wouldn't even stand near him and he thought maybe it wasn't such a big deal that she saw him yesterday. She didn't seem to want to confront him either.

He wondered how you can love someone so much that you were afraid to be near them...because that's what it had become to him. Moth to a flame. He'd get burned if he ever get near her again. So he decided he wouldn't. Unless he had to. There was doubt Josh would let him stay out of staff meeting just so he wouldn't have to breath the same air as her.

Jim stirred his coffee and looked up as Ryan tapped his shoulder. He turned around. 

"Wassu-" he stopped when he turned to see Pam standing there looking up at him, her eyes intense. "P-Pam."

She sucked in a breath and he felt his knees grow weak at the sight of her being so close.

"Hi." she said softly, her eyes never leaving his. 

Jim had to grip the counter to hold himself up. This was it. This was the moment he dreaded. Pam, standing in front of him, her eyes searching, no where for him to escape. The floor wasn't going to swallow him up like he hoped and he was stuck facing the woman who could break him in so many ways. He saw Casino night flash before his eyes. He saw them on the deck of the Booze Cruise. All those little moments that meant anything to him were assaulting his brain right now.  His mouth felt dry and he swallowed hard. He took her all in and said in almost a whisper. "Hey."