- Text Size +
Author's Chapter Notes:
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

I invented a younger sister for Pam named Jenny. I'm still really new at this, so any and all comments would be appreciated.
"I don't care," Pam says as she hurls another dart at the painted circle on the wall.

"I know."

"I'm happy for him. He's a nice guy. A girlfriend guy. Girlfriend guys should have girlfriends. And she's pretty. Really, really, not-found-in-Scranton pretty. Really nice skin."

"You're pretty."

"Jenny, no, no, she's like gorgeous. She could be a model. Seriously. A tiny model, with a perfect body," Pam swirls her drink until it is uniformly pink and gulps it, just a bit.

"Well, it's his loss. You shouldn't even be focused on him, anyway. You don't need a man. Even if you did, maybe you could find one that doesn't work at the fucking paper company. You could start by, I don't know, not spending all of your bar-time talking to me. It's a waste; you're just not my type," Pam's sister says with a chuckle.

"You just need to broaden your romantic horizons," Pam smiles, teases, tosses another dart, "Who is winning?"

"I stopped throwing them fifteen minutes ago, so by the standard rules of Beesly darts, you have outlasted me."

"I think I need another drink."

"What is that, four? Maybe you should hold off a bit on the Cosmos. Diversify. Hey, broaden your horizons," Jenny raises her eyebrows, nods, points.

"And get what? Milk? Please."

"Oh, no, I was thinking appletinis. Let's get you good and drunk," Jenny spins off her stool and saunters over to the bar. She taps twice on the bar and flirts with the bartender when he walks over. Jenny was younger than Pam by almost two years, but much brasher and more confident. In high school she was the captain of the varsity soccer team and now she was a nurse. Pam wonders for a moment how her life would have been different if she had been more confident, made bolder decisions. Pam is so lost in thought that she misses a woman spot her from across the bar, point and drag her much taller companion across the floor, towards Pam.

"Pam?"

Pam stirs, looks up, "Oh, Karen, hey!" the blood rushes to her face, "Hi, Jim, I didn't even know you came here." Her previously untargeted anxiety sublimes into nausea.

"Hot date?" Karen says, biting her front lip and winking her eyebrows.

Pam laughes, uncomfortably, "No, no," she waves her hand back and forth, undirected, "extended happy hour with my sister. She's a nurse, very stressful job. Requires some heavy drinking." Jim seems to be examining the walls.

"Don't you dare pass off your latent alcoholism off on me. Hi, I'm Jen Beesly, I'm Pam's sister," Jenny is back, and she extends her hand towards Karen, who takes it.

"Karen Fillipelli. I just started working with Pam."

"Ah-ha, paper company business. Exciting stuff."

"Bite me," Pam says, but she giggles.

"Care to join us in dark-corner-near-dart-board land?" Jenny smiles. If Pam were sober, she would have hacked off Jenny's head with the end of a barstool just about now, but she's not, so she giggles again.

Karen looks around and Jim's face seems a bit strained, "Oh, sure!" She pulls up a stool from the next table, "Come on, Jim, be social!"

"Hi! Jim, is it?" Jenny smiles at Jim, "I'm Jen and this is my sister Pam." Pam giggles some more and starts sipping her appletini through a plastic stirrer.

"Oh, actually, I work with Pam too, but it's nice to meet you, Jen," Jim says and Pam giggles some more.

This should affect Jenny more than it does, as she's a little bit drunk, too, "Oh, are you Jim-works-with-Pam?"

"Is that like a Native American thing?" Jim jokes, but it falls flat. Except with Pam, whose giggling fit seems to intensify.

"Haha, um, no. Halpert comma Jim. I remember you. You were on my ex-wedding phone call list," Jenny is not quite drunk enough to ignore how uncomfortable Jim looks.

"Oh really," Jim says," that's, uh, funny, because I didn't get your call." He stares, frankly, accusingly at Pam as he says this, but she's too busy moving from her drink to her sister's dirty martini.

"Oh, that's right," Jenny squints, a bit, like she's thinking, but the truth is this conversation has been at the forefront of her mind for six months, "I talked to your roommate. Pam didn't have a new number for you when you, uh, moved. He seemed to have some, haha, interesting opinions about Pam." Jim looks up and holds eye contact with Jenny, who isn't too drunk not to give him a bit of a stare-down.

"Haha, wait, what do you mean, ex-wedding? What's an ex-wedding?" Karen perks up.

Pam looks up and steadies herself for the first time in minutes. She seems to have stopped laughing, Jenny didn't really catch when that happened, "Oh, it's a dead wedding. You know, ex-wedding, like ex-parrot, you know, on Monty Python."

Karen smiles and laughs, a bit, but looks uncomfortable, "Oh, right, yeah. What happened?"

"I dumped my fiance eight days before our wedding," Pam slurs, "because I'm like, you know, a bitch. It was supposed to be in June. But it wasn't. In June. Or, at all."

"Oh."

"Yeah, so I called a third of the guests," Jenny inserts, now sorry that she brought this up, "the other two bridesmaids called the others. It was a big calling mission," Jenny nods, smiles, but is clearly uncomfortable.

"Mark, do you know Mark?" Karen shakes her head, Pam continues, "Well, he was Jim's roommate. When Jenny called him, he said that Jim thought I was a total bitch or something and that he didn't give a shit what I did with my life." Jim looks up now and for the first time makes eye contact with Pam.

"What?" Jim says.

"Ouch," Karen responds.

"Yeah, it was definitely harsh," Jenny pauses, looks up, "Do you have the time?"

Karen looks down at her watch. Jim is still holding eye contact with Pam, who's eyes have started to well a little bit, "Yeah, it's 10:15."

"Oh, wow, my husband was supposed to pick us up at ten! He's probably waiting outside," Jenny grabs Pam and pulls her off her stool, "It was really nice to meet you both."

Once they get outside, Jenny pulls out her cell phone and dials her husband. While it's ringing, she says, "You were right. She is really pretty."

Pam giggles, but the happiness is gone, "What did I tell you?"


purplebelt is the author of 5 other stories.
This story is a favorite of 8 members. Members who liked Not a Bar Fight also liked 2447 other stories.


You must login (register) to review or leave jellybeans