Jim laughed out loud and shifted forward, closer to the alarm clock again so that Jill could somehow reach the button if she flailed around enough. Her hand came within inches of the button and Jim grimaced.

“You can do it…come on…”

Once again with the waving arms, once again the stretch and then…finally…connection!

Jill’s eyes got as big as saucers when music filled the room. Then her arms started going again. Startled, then supremely stoked – that was her standard mode of operation, Jim noticed.

“What the heck are you doing out there!” Pam called from inside the bathroom and Jim laughed again. “Why do you keep turning the music off and on?”

“It’s not me Pam…It’s Jill, and she thinks it’s like the most entertaining thing on the planet…so….”

Pam opened the bathroom door, and leaned into their bedroom a towel turbened her wet hair. “What?”

“She accidentally hit the power button on the alarm clock and she’s been trying to hit it again ever since…But she’s got like zero aim. It’s hilarious….It’s like she finally figured out she’s got some power over things or something…so funny.”

Pam smiled and moved into the bedroom with a towel wrapped around her. She sat next to Jim on the bed and smiled at their baby. “Ooh that’s a good song…you like that, huh?”

Jim turned Jill around so she could see her mama, and immediately her eyes were transfixed by the towel on her head.

“Whoa…uhoh…look at that lip…she’s not sure if she likes that look.” Jim said, one finger in each of Jill’s fists.

“Oooh…it’s just me. It’s mommy,” Pam said pulling the towel from her hair. “See? Just me…no biggee.”

Jim watched as Pam’s damp tresses came falling down around her shoulders. Jill was instantly pleased. Her face visibly relaxed.

Jim was pleased as well.

“Wow, I didn’t realize she hadn’t seen me like that before. I guess she’s usually napping when I’m drying my hair….What?”

Jim swallowed. So he had been staring. “Nothing……Um, speaking of naps she’s due for one soon isn’t she?”

Pam made a face. “Yeah, but you’re gonna have to quit riling her up if you want her to atually sleep.”

“Will do.”

Pam grinned. “What? Why are you staring at me like that?”

“Nothing. Just…That’s a good look for you Beesly…I like it.”

“Oh yeah?” She said, and he watched a blush rise from the edge of the towel all the way up to her cheeks. Hot and adorable.

“Yeah.”

Pam bit her bottom lip. “Hmm…why don’t you get Jill to sleep and I’ll show you another look.”

“Nice.”

“Yeah…there’s like a completely different look under the towel....I think you might like it…so…”

“Yes I actually am familiar with that look and I have to say…it’s…Well I’m fond of it, Pam. So…why don’t you…you know – prepare for that….and give me about 15 minutes to put the DJ to bed.”

“Not going anywhere.”

~~~~~~~

Pam had a pair of old gray winter gloves she’d been close to donating to the Salvation Army during her tri-annnual closet clean out. But after looking at them for a few moments, she’d decided to do something different with them.

Jim had come home one evening, to find her cutting off all the fingers (so she could wiggle hers through the holes of course) off of one glove, sewing on two buttons for eyes and using yarn to create a nose and a mouth. She’d made a puppet, and the very first time Pam slipped it on her hand, Jill went absolutely crazy. Like the frigging Stones had come to town.

They found that there was a very specific “cooing” sound that Jill made whenever the puppet came out, so of course Pam named the puppet, Cooey.

Cooey had been all the rage for weeks now, and at the moment Jim sat holding Jill as she tried to grab at Cooey…perhaps to eat him? They couldn’t be sure of course. Maybe she only wanted to give him a smooch, but if the drooling was any indication Cooey would be gummed to death if Jill ever got her sweet little hands on him.  

So Pam kept Cooey at bay, since Cooey was made with buttons and buttons were on the No Jill list.

The No Jill list was yet another funny, amusing thing that Pam had made for Jill. It was a very extensive list posted on the fridge. The list included things like: buttons, pizza, pillows, and beer. The list donned a photo of Jill covered by the national symbol for “don’t do this” – a red circle with a bold slash going through it. Right through her little face.

Jim marveled at the way having a baby had brought out even more of Pam’s creative side and she seemed to be reveling in it. That didn’t mean however, that he couldn’t have a little fun…

So at the 7:30 p.m. showing of the Cooey show, Jim began bouncing Jill on his knee as she went wild.

“Hewo Jiwa ....I’m bwack!…I loooove to pway wit you.”

Jim cleared his throat. “Um…I have a question Cooey, if I may……Why exactly are their so many ‘w’s in your speech?”

“So I can twell little boys like you to swuck it.”

“Wow…um, uncalled for. Cooey, I’m not sure that’s the kind of language my wife and I want our daughter to use…Not sure where my wife went by the way…she seems to have gotten lost somewhere behind a talking puppet…”

“Hmm…vwey intewesting….Can you descwibe yo wife to me? Maybe I’ve seen huh.”

Jim pursed his lips and looked at Jill, who was now stuffing her fist in her mouth since she couldn’t get to Cooey. “Opened myself up for that one didn’t I, Jilly?”

“Pwease descwibe huh and qwit stalling.”

“Demanding puppets…ok. Um, she’s actually about….you know – average height, brownish…nay, caramel colored hair…right, yes caramel is good….honey in fact. A caramel-honey mix…” he added squinting as if to conjure it in his mind.

“Vwey good…continue. She sounds dewicious.”

Jim laughed in spite of himself. It took him nearly a minute to get himself back together. “Dewicious…ok…um…Well, she’s smart. Funny as hell…um…well how else can I really describe…Oh, I got it – since she had Jill, she’s got huge knock -

“Oook, thwank you Jim fow shawing yo descwiption of yo wife! That’s aw we’ll be needing at the moment…”

“Woah I do not think it’s ok to be interrupted by a puppet. I was going to say that my wife has huge knowledge. I’m not really sure what you thought I was going to say Cooey…would you mind sharing what you anticipated me sa -

“Stop it! You’re running the show!”

“Is that the puppet now or…Oh my God, Pam is that you?!...Jill, I think we found mommy!”

“I hate you.” Pam said, stifling a grin as she pulled Cooey off of her hands and stood up. She started walking away.

“Aww…come on…Look, see…Jill want’s an encore……..Pam, come back!...Pam if you come back….I’m pretty sure Jill will throw her diaper at Cooey…you wouldn’t want to miss that!”

“Oh my God!”

~~~~~~~~

Pam stood just outside the nursery, peaking past the doorway as subtly as she possibly could, so that he wouldn’t stop. It was an interesting phenomenon. He was absolutely fine singing late 90’s hits with their daughter, but when he was singing something different, like Pat-a-Cake for instance…if you caught him – he stopped. He would literally not continue no matter how much you begged and pleaded.

“Bake me a cake as fast as you can…roll it and pat it…”

She smiled to herself when Jill made a funny little noise, in response to Jim finger-drawing a ‘B’ on her tummy

Her legs went crazy.

“Put in the oven for the baby and me!.........And don’t make any for momm-y,” Jim said adding the rhyme at the end.

He turned to her. “Beesly you’re so obvious…I can literally feel your retinas burning holes in my back.”

She giggled as she walked away. “Sorry…carry on, baker’s man.”

~~~~~~~

“Oh my God she thinks whistling is the funniest thing ever!”

Jim laughed and gazed at his baby as Pam leaned close, whistling as she pushed the cart. Jill was the best shopping baby. She made a lot of little amused sounds, but never flipped out like some kids they’d heard in the store.

“Ok hold on…” Jim said and started to whistle the little diddy that emerged at the tail end of Sitting On the Dock of the Bay, as they walked down the next aisle.

Pam tossed some fabric softener in their cart and joined in the whistling.

The PA system came into view as they passed the photo processing center, and Jim stopped the cart. He glanced at the microphone. “I dare you to whistle into that.”

“I’m so not falling for that again, Halpert.”

Jim frowned. “Pam…I’m asking you to do something for the amusement of your child. This has nothing at all to do with me.…Be mature Pam.”

She couldn’t hold her glare and she couldn’t resist a dare…He knew that.

With tongue in cheek, Pam approached the microphone. When she launched into the Andy Griffith Show, Jill’s eyes shot towards the ceiling, towards the opposite wall, towards Daddy, towards Mommy…everywhere.

Jim laughed. “She’s completely flipping out right now…she’s like where is the whistling coming from! What on Earth is happening!”

Pam giggled and heard herself echoed over the PA system. Jill recognized that sound for sure. She shifted immediately towards Mommy’s laughter. She grinned wide and fidgeted in her car seat.

Pam grinned back at her and jogged over to the seat. “Come here…you want to hear yourself?,” she said and they quickly maneuvered her out of the seat. Pam laughed as she jogged Jill back to the microphone. “Ok…go ahead baby say something….”

Jill batted at the microphone, opened her mouth wide…

“You can’t eat it Jilly…”

“Ma’am, please don’t play with that…that’s not a toy.”

“Oh…I’m – I’m sorry…we’re sorry,” she said quickly glancing at Jill.

Jim pursed his lips to hold his laughter at bay as the saleswoman disappeared in a huff. He shook his head at Pam as she walked back to their cart sheepishly.

“Did you say we? Were you actually trying to implicate your own daughter?”

“I hate you.”

~~~~~~~

“I know…I know…Mommy’s crazy for leaving…and I know what you’re gonna say…You told her to leave Daddy. You told her to go spend the day with her mom…I know Jill. I know. But that’s because Daddy kinda wanted to throw Mommy out the window because she’s crazy…don’t tell her I said that. That feeling will pass…it always does….But see look…this means that you and Daddy get to spend the day together…it also means that maybe one day I’ll stop talking about myself in the third person…That would be…a miracle.”

Jill pulled her foot towards her mouth. Toes were love.

“People scoff at that skill…I say why not…if I could do it, I would.”

Jill gurgled something around her toes.

“Exactly…So ok, we’re going to visit G-ma Halpert….What do you want to wear? Mommy really should have picked an outfit for us before she left….and I know what you’re gonna say – I very adamantly told her that I had everything under control and that she didn’t have to worry about a thing…but listen, contrary to what people might think, I’m not a fashion expert….” He turned to her closet and sighed. Her eyes followed him.

“I know…shocking right? Daddy always looks so put together……Well it takes a lot of people, a lot of time…a team of experts…It’s…you wouldn’t want all the attention Jill. You feel a little like a piece of meat.”

At her silence, Jim continued. “ Probably a dress right? Girls do that sometimes on special occasions…ok…great….dresses,” he said as Jill continued to suck on her toes.

He thumbed through the tiny little dresses that were on equally tiny little hangers. “Purple polka dots, yellow daisies, pink….what does Mommy call this?” he said turning to Jill as if she’d answer. “Oh! Yes…gingham. Got it. Yeah…this is a winner I think,” he said pulling it out.

Jim held it up for Jill above her crib. “Whatdya think? Pink?”

Gurgle.

“I know…good choice….And it came with a little headband right? Ok…where does Mommy keep the…” he looked around the room, spotted the headband holder that Pam had painted little butterflies on. “Perfect…headband – check.”

Proud of himself, Jim got Jill ready. He even managed the headband without any fussing. She was pink from head to foot when he put on her little pink shoes.

“Jill…you’re a vision as always. I’ll go as Ducky.”

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