Sometimes the past haunts them.
Angst, and fluff, and smut. Not necessarily in that order.
Lordy! I don't think 'your Jim' is too needy...it's realistic that the past will sometimes intrude on their happiness. Great job. I loved it. :)
VB, you know I love this chapter. The chapel scene flows so well - I'll readily admit I had a tear in my eye when Pam wonders to herself if her father had sent Jim to watch over her. I love finding out more about Pam and Jim’s past – your imaginings are ‘bang on’ in character for me and they add so much more depth to the story. Great Job. Now...go write some more...erm, pretty please!
Author's Response: Thanks, BA. And thanks for your comments on the draft. They really did help!
Well, it won't surprise you to know that I like this chapter. The moments between Jim and his Mom are lovely. I especially like the way Jim helps her cope with the pain - making her squeeze his hand the same way she used to. More please!!! BAx
Author's Response:
And thank you for all your help! Chapter is decidedly better for your input.
I'm definitely hoping to have the next chapter up before we leave for Africa, so be looking for a draft in the next few days!
I so much want to write to a considered review but I simply cannot get past the vision of Jim in hospital scrubs! I mean it’s clouding every thought I have.
Focus…focus damn it. So, here are the things I have loved about the last few chapters (apologies by the way for not posting a review since chapter 20):
Cardiac Care Top Ten Fic-tastic Moments –
1) Jim wearing the light blue scrubs – duh!
2) Pam describing how she and her father would find precious moments alone in the chapel. It was heartbreaking to imagine Joe whispering to Pam his hopes for her future but it provided sound reason for why she wanted to go alone to the chapel.
3) Jim’s sneak preview into Pam’s thoughts about his relationship with Karen. Also, this creates a more level playing field – Jim now knows that Pam isn’t unaffected by his relationship…anything but and Pam knows about Jim’s experience in Oz.
4) Angie. Love her. I am lucky enough to have a couple of Australian friends and really you couldn’t hope to meet warmer people.
5) You taking the time out to explain what AP English Classes are to your international readership.
6) This line: ‘He was full of despair, staring into space, feeling hollow and seeing nothing.’
7) The fact that Jim still hasn’t called Karen (not that I’m anti-Karen but I’m an unapologetic JAM fan).
8) How they sleep together.
9) How you have kept me in suspense – to have them kiss now would be great…so great, but it’s realistic I think to have them circle each other for a little while longer.
10) The fact that this wonderful story isn’t over yet…here’s to another 25 chapters!
Author's Response:
Dear God, BA! Can I bottle you up and keep you? Just pull out a little Blind Assassin whenever I'm in the doldrums? I am so glad you decided to leave another review. Your reviews are kinda like an opium rush. (Not that I've ever had one of those but...)
Not sure this story or this writer have the legs for another 25 chapters. But I think we're good for another 8 or so. We'll see. But thank you so, so much for the effusively positive reviews you leave me. I can't tell you how you make me grin!
So, my plan was to hold off reading your fabulous story until you had posted the very last chapter...why, you ask? I'll tell you why, it's because I knew that I would get hooked and then spend my days wondering when you were next going to update. My resolve failed me today and surprise-bloody-surprise, I read all 20 chapters and now I am positively overcome with anticipation! Seriously, your story is brilliant. Not only is it well written, engaging, and has caused me to cry and grin like a damn fool, in pretty much equal measure, but I enjoy reading about all the medical information too. I can take or leave ER but I would rather lop off my own arm than miss an installment of your 'medical drama'. I can’t wait for more…I mean it…I may have to turn to drink if you don’t update soon. x
Author's Response: BlindAssassin, you leave me totally speechless! I am sitting here grinning like a damn fool myself! Thank you! Thank you!
VB - thanks for such a well written and emotion-packed chapter. I re-read parts of the dialogue in the Larissa scene because I was looking for sense behind the nonsense - why would she say the things she did? I guess that's the point though - her thoughts are off the wall, bizarre and unpredictable and that's where it gets scary. You explained Jim's fear and confusion so well. Also, as a lovely counterbalance to what was an emotionally charged chapter, you had Jim reminiscing about his break room conversation with Pam - so sweet and so them. BAx
Author's Response: Thanks, BA! I'm really glad you enjoyed it! Thanks for pointing out what worked for you! I hope to have the next chapter in your Inbox soon!
Hold the phone! Pam's taking Jim to the chapel...is it cause they're "...gonna get marr-ar-ar-ied"? I'm getting WAY ahead of myself, aren't I? Still, a girl can dream. I love The Walker Man and now that I know the 'Johnny who?' story is based on a real life event, I love him even more. He jumped off the screen for me - great characterization, VB. Can't wait for more. BA
Author's Response:
Yep, you're getting ahead of yourself, honey! You have to wait until October to see Pam & JIm get married!
So glad you love the Walker Man! He was a wonderful man!
This is a wonderful update, VB. I really enjoy the scenes with Jim and his Dad. They have a complicated relationship, and I'm not sure either of them really knows how to relate to the other. I think you do a great job with them - e.g. without them saying very much at all, you manage to convey the complexities inherent in their relationship. The part where Jim is holding his Dad's hand and Ted pulls away after a while and then won't look at him, was heartbreaking. I'm really looking forward to seeing how you develop this element of the story.
Author's Response: Thanks, BA! We'll develop that relationship a bit more in two chapters. Next up, as I said, Larissa and Pam get to know each other a bit!
A look at what might have happened between The Job and 'round about Money. Lots of steam in the beginning, then some angst for good measure.This is such a great story. I have just spent the past couple of hours reading all of your posts and can I just say: wow! You get the balance between angst, fluff and smut just right. Are you working on anything else? I would love to read more. :)
Author's Response: Wow, thanks Blind Assasin! That\'s really nice! I am not currently working on anything new because when I write I fall into a black whole of obsession and ignore everything else in my life (laundry, hubby, kids, etc.). PLUS I\'m trying to work on some other writing projects (non Office fic). But you never know . . . when the mood hits, it hits! (Plus, the benefits of writing smut are making my hubby not mind my time spent fondling my keyboard so much.) Anyway, keep an eye out. You never know when I may get the itch! (And reviews make me more likely to write!)
The first week is the longest. A visit.
I love everything you write and so before I even started to read this story, I was in that warm and happy place. Fellow reviewers have already mentioned some of your beautifully written lines and I really can't add to what's been said. What I do want to say though is that Jim’s sense of urgency and his need to be close to Pam really leapt off the page/screen for me. It reminded me of a relationship I had in my early twenties when I would spend my entire Friday at work clock-watching and on the stroke of 5, I would hightail it out of the building and make my way over to his place. That summer seemed to last forever (did I just channel Bryan Adams?!) and well, I’m hoping you have a change of heart and that this story lasts just as long.
Author's Response: I'm really pleased you thought his sense of urgency/missing her came across - I know just the feeling you dexcribe and that's exactly what I hoped to convey. This story already has a beginning and an end - but, I have an idea for another Brooklyn thing, so Thor and work willing, I'll squeeze a little more life out of Pam's summer in the big, baked apple. Thanks so much, Blind Assassin!
I love, love, love the twist. And the part where Pam meets Dwight for the first cracked me up: "You hesitated. Who sent you? Who do you work for?" Hee hee.
Author's Response: Thanks!! Thanks for all your help also!!
Great Job Jinxcoke. I think the way you engineer the twists and turns in this story is believably done and I can't wait for more. Update soon...and sorry I was a late with the beta help!
BAx
It's been three years since Jim accepted the promotion to New York. After two years of silence, Pam sends Jim a gift.
Hey VB! So glad to discover that you have been struck with a new idea and that you had the generosity of spirit to put pen to paper, so to speak. I love it and can't wait for part 2.BAx
Author's Response: I love your way with words, BA! ... generosity of spirit to put pen to paper ... Really, we could make money if we could sell an elixer that makes people feel the way you make me feel! Thanks.
VB, this chapter is just lovely. Thank goodness Jim didn’t use the return shipping label – I can say for sure that this would have killed me off! And, I just love Pam in this story: “I just needed you to know. Once” – gulp!
And this line: “The composition was kind of dynamic, with the hands and the legs pushing their way into the frame.” You my friend are an artist. BAx
Author's Response: Thank you! Your reviews always put the biggest smiles on my face!
Another great chapter, VB and it’s a thought-provoking one at that. I can see where Pam is coming from; I too think Jim would have cared more about her future career that his own. It was clear from early on in the show that Jim didn’t consider that he had a career; paper sales were simply a means to an end. Consequently, (this not being the only reason however), I think the potential existed for him to have only invested in her future, thereby paying little or no attention to his own ambitions and dreams until a few years down the line. If this did turn out to be the case, I don’t think he would look upon Pam’s achievements in a negative way, rather her success would cast light on his lack of ambition and/or achievements and that can be very hard to cope with, for all sorts of reasons. As we know, Jim is a smart guy and in season 4 of the show, we see that when he wants something badly enough, he pushes himself forward. Maybe that’s what would have happened if they had got together on Casino Night? Maybe he would have pushed himself to be more than a paper salesman, for her, for them. Or maybe he would have sat back and given every ounce of himself to her as he did day after day until the night she kissed him back and then told him she was still going to marry Roy. I guess we’ll never know! Am anxiously awaiting chapter 5 and am hoping you will post before I leave for a week’s holiday on Friday evening…hint, hint! BAx
Author's Response:
Hi, BAx!
Yep, what she said! (VB says while pointing at BAx.) I think the potential was definitely there for Pam & Jim to end up in a pretty unbalanced relationship, which is never good in the long run.
I'll try to get chapter 5 up tonight. You're 4 hours ahead of me, so if I don't get it finished in the next couple of hours, I won't make your deadline. I hope you have a good holiday! (Or "vacation" as we call it here in the States ... just in case you need it for your story. Here in the States, "holidays" are the 10 national holidays that are scattered throughout the year. New Years Day, Martin Luther King Day, Presidents' Day, Independence Day ... Jim wouldn't "go on holiday", he'd "go on vacation" to return to see Pamela in London. A sequel to On London Time, perhaps??)
Lovely, VB. I can't wait for Chapter 6.
I would say more but I'm in the middle of unpacking and if I stop for too long, I'll never get going again. BAx
Author's Response: Well, I feel flattered that you interrupted your unpacking to read my story! I'm glad you had a good trip...
Hey, jazzfan! So glad you finished this and on such a lovely, satisfying note.
Now, because I love to make a list, I give you my fav parts:
1)Jim refusing pain meds because he wanted to be clear-headed to talk things through with Pam...sigh.
2)Jim’s reaction to hearing that he may have saved Ryan’s life…ha!
“I might have,” Jim replied matter of factly. “But not on purpose,” he added with a wry look.
3)Jim the naughty patient: "He amused himself by making the unappealing food on his tray into interesting shapes and trying to freak out the nurses in various ways, usually unsuccessfully. They were a tough crowd." This had me chuckling.
4)Pam’s appreciation of ‘Defensive Jim’:
“It’s normal to defend yourself, Jim. And truthfully? I kind of like that,” she admitted with a mischevious grin. “it’s kind of hot.” It most definitely is HOT!
5)And this line…so beautiful: "He had, afterall, gone from near mortality to immortality in less than a week, he reflected."
6)And to top it all off, you named the pooch, Voldemort!!!
Loved it all. Great story. Great Job. Now I have GREAT expectations for your next foray into fanfic writing.
Author's Response: Wow, thanks for the detailed review BA. It\'s always good to hear people\'s reactions to specific parts in the story, and you\'ve given me that in spades. I\'ve always considered Jimpert a pretty passive guy, and I wanted to explore how he would handle it if Pam was ever actually threatened - and this is what came out.\r\nI appreciate your comments, and if I were Voldemort, I\'d be wagging my tail like crazy.
Lordy, jazzfan...I was so not expecting Alex to confront Jim in the garage! The guy is nuts! Who got shot...is Jim okay? Did Ryan absorb the bullets? Or, did Art Boy get what was coming to him? Why am I asking these questions...I should just read the next chapter, right?!!! Great job!
Author's Response: Yay, Alex was a surprise - and he definitely has issues of the postal persuasion. Turn the page, silly. Thanks.
Officer Scarne!!! Nice touch. I think I may have guessed what Ryan's deal is but then again you've led me down a blind alley before now! :) Can wait to read more. Also, can I petition you to call the pooch Voldermort...so cute and so Pam and Jim? BA
Author's Response: Of course I\'ve lead you down a blind alley, you\'re a Blind Assasin. What were you expecting? *grin* Seriously, thanks, and if you know what Ryan\'s deal is, please PM me. Because I don\'t. Thanks for the review and I will only promise that in the next chapter, the dog does get a name.
Wow, Jazzfan! This story is great. I’ve just read the whole lot in one go and now I’m sat here trying to keep a hold on all the theories whizzing about my brain. I have my suspicions about who the stalker/burglar is, but I’m taking nothing for granted. You’ve led me down a couple of dead ends already - I’m wise to your mad skills. Ha!
Here’s what I love:
1 - Jim. I don’t think you’ve once let ‘your Jim’ stray from character. His interactions with Ryan and Art Boy (love it!) are GREAT. When he lets Alex have it at the gallery, I actually hissed “yes!” out loud. Honest. Mr. BA shot me a ‘Care Bear stare’.
“Yeah,” Jim said slowly as he shrugged his shoulders. “How do you suppose Van Gogh managed to paint this and not be in New York?” He took a second to enjoy the look on Alex’s face. “Wait, there aren’t even any stars in New York, are there?” Jim tried to keep at least a hint of humor in his voice. “Wouldn’t have happened.”
Alex cocked his head and his look told Jim that Alex had underestimated him. That made him happy.
2 - Jim and Dwight – I loved their interaction. When Jim asks him to ‘maintain order’, I grinned like a damn fool – and bless him, he does. Although, I did think he was going to spray Ryan himself at one point.
“I want you to maintain order.”
“Okay, I will assist you. When and where?” - PERFECT Dwight speak.
And this made me love Dwight even more than I do already:
For a moment, Dwight looked at him with a new respect. Then he said, “A good provider and successful man protects his woman from harm, thus enhancing the survival of his offspring.” The moment was over.
I’m just sorry the ride is almost over. I don’t think I’ve read a JAM mystery story before. Gotta say, I doubted it would be my cup of tea…BUT it so is. Great job!
Author's Response: Thank you so much, Blind Assasin (love the nic), for your detailed review. It made me happy that you find \"my\" Jim in character through all this. I was trying hard not to make him into some sort of action hero. I love Dwight and Jim together, so I had real fun writing that office scene. I\'m delighted you\'re enjoying my little mystery, and all will be revealed soon. Thanks again!
Just lovely. You write beautifully. "The cottony silence of falling snow..." Sigh. BAx
Author's Response: Thank you, Blind Assassin. I\'m glad you liked it.
yanana, this so lovely. Would say more but I’m off to read the rest of your posts!
All her life, Pam's felt invisible. That's all about to change. An AU take on Beach Games. callisto , I was just about to log off when I saw that you’d posted a new story…so glad I did, because it’s just lovely. I like that you have Jim unable to resist coming round to see Pam after her admission – the fact that he doesn’t do so in the show has always irked me. I know he was erm…for want of a better term, ‘emotional missing’ in season 3, but really, I don’t think he would’ve been able to stay away. I guess this might be a one-shot kinda deal but you know, if you’re so inclined, there may be scope for additional chapters…would love to see Toby’s reaction to the change in Jim and Pam’s relationship and I think you could ‘write the arse off’ a creepy Toby story. Great job! BA
Author's Response: Thank you BA! That always bugged me too--it always seemed so sad to me that he wouldn\'t have talked to her more after she finally \'fessed up to everything. I\'m glad you liked this, it\'s been on my mind for a while now. I don\'t think I\'ll want to add to it, but it\'s funny you mention a \'creepy Toby\' story. I have the beginning of one tucked away somewhere, maybe I\'ll look into doing something with it. :) Thanks for the review!
How did I bloody miss this one?!! jazz, this is so lovely. You've given us: a)a novel insight into the inner-workings of Jim Halpert's mind (past and present) and b) some great writing. Thank you. I think this may be my favourite of all your current stories. Yes, I love it that much! :)
Author's Response: Aw shucks, BA, thanks! I\'m glad you enjoyed it - it was fun to write this one.
Callisto, telling you that I love this seems like a huge, clichéd understatement…but it’s all I got!
Your characterizations are spot on and Kevin's chat with Jim about his scoring rationale actually brought a tear to my eye. I’ll be adding this fic to my favourites list…oh, and the pic of Jim you tagged at the end…such a lovely treat!
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