Date: August 05, 2007 10:47 am Title: The Fjords of Sweden
Just read this and I'm really enjoying it. You are doing a great job with everyone's voices and I'm just giggling at all the Jim/Dwight conversation. Very in-character.
And I never played RISK, but you're explaining it so well that I feel I have a pretty good handle on the rules. So good job!
Looking foward to more.
Author's Response: I'm glad that the RISK directions aren't too confusing. I knew when I started this I really limited my readership by making it the hub of the activity of the story, but if you're never played it and still enjoyed it, then maybe there is hope. I try to make the voices in character as much as possible, or at least the manner in which they say things to stay in character. This is a very dialogue heavy story, so I'm glad its worked so far for you. Thank you for your review EverybodyHurts.
10 [Report This]Date: August 03, 2007 03:18 am Title: The Fjords of Sweden
Awesome dialogue - very clearly drawn. I could totally hear the characters voices - great story!
Author's Response: I'm glad to hear/read about that you thought the character's voice are well-drawn. Obviously, that's a challenge for me. Thank you for the review, Sevian.
9 [Report This]Date: August 02, 2007 01:56 pm Title: The Fjords of Sweden
Is it possible to be driven to the edge of my seat over reading about a game of Risk? :confused: Apparently it is. I'm having way too much fun reading this.
I really like the way that you are telling this from Jim's POV. It's not overly mushy, but still slightly sentimental. And I love how it's not completely centered around Pam. (Not that I don't love the stories from Jim's POV that do revolve around Pam, but this is a very nice change of pace.)
Oh and one other thing, though not completely. This is totally taking me back to HS when I worked on our school newspaper (I was the Ad Manager) and we would waste away hour lunches and breaks in the newspaper office playing RISK with each other off the networked computers. I'm totally missing that right now. *sniff* I think I need to run to Toys'R'Us and pick up a board game.
Author's Response: Yeah, it is definitely a challenge to make a board game dramatic, but I'm trying. Of course, it's just a way to get Jim/Dwight, Dwight/Andy, and Jim/Pam interaction really. Yeah the Jim/Pam dynamic will become more apparent in upcoming chapters, but I'm not trying to make it overly mushy. The most angsty chapter was actually Pam's POV. Still, expect more Jim/Dwight, and maybe some Michael/Jim soon. Thank you for the review, BlueJeanBaby.
Date: August 02, 2007 02:01 am Title: The Fjords of Sweden
This is a great story! Reminds me of a friend's father's opinion of Risk-- "He who controls Europe controls the world!"
Love the characterization
Author's Response: For the sake of the world I hope that you're wrong, because Andy controls Europe. Jim's in a bit of a hole, but who knows what will happen next (well I sort of do). I appreciate the words on characterization, I'm trying to make their voices fairly realistic, while giving them some room to incorporate the game and the situation. Thanks for the review Elvish.
10 [Report This]Date: August 01, 2007 11:13 pm Title: The Fjords of Sweden
Woo hoo! I just found this gem of a story and am LOVING it. Great job with all the voices. I particularly like the german thing, keeps making me laugh out loud. Also, how perfect that it's PAM's game of RISK?! So great. Well done and I can't wait for more.
Author's Response: Thank you. I'm a big fan of everything you've done, so your kind words mean a lot. The German thing is going to be a running joke for a while, so I'm glad you like it. Thanks for the review Stablergirl.
Date: August 01, 2007 10:54 pm Title: The Fjords of Sweden
Brilliant chapter, update soon. Although I must say that I enjoyed Dwight's joke about the French in 1940. I do hate the French. Keep writing.
Author's Response: I wasn't sure if the 1940 French joke seemed a little too out of character or left field, but I'm glad you liked it. Thank you for the review and kind words blueturfbronco.
Date: August 01, 2007 06:25 pm Title: The Fjords of Sweden
With all this talk of Norway and fjords I am reminded of a variety of Monty Python routines.
Author's Response: I like how your mind works. That was actually unintentional, but after you mentioned it I immediately thought of the Dead Parrot sketch, among others. Thanks for the review Alex Wert.