Penname: Alex Wert Real name:
Member Since: February 02, 2007

Bio:

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Stories by Alex Wert
The Fairest Of Them All by Alex Wert Rated: M [Reviews - 5] 2
Summary: On their way back from a business trip, Michael, Pam, and Ryan survive a death-defying car crash, but when they return to the office, all is not well in the world. Faced with malice and magic, are their wits enough to survive an escalating deadly threat?
Categories: Present, Crossover, Alternate Universe
Characters: Ensemble
Genres: Dream/Fantasy, Horror, Humor, Parody, Romance, Hurt/Comfort, Slash, Suspense, Travel
Warnings: Adult language, Dubious Consent, Moderate sexual content, Other Adult Theme, Violence/Injury
Series: None
Chapters: 1 Table of Contents
Completed: No Word count: 1386 Read Count: 1152 ePub Downloads: 0
[Report This] Published: March 17, 2009 Updated: March 18, 2009
Becoming Hitler by Alex Wert Rated: T [Reviews - 41] 12
Summary:

It's not so much that she hates the house - she does, but it's not so much that as it is that he purchased a house without without so much as mentioning it to her beforehand. But she'll never tell him that she hates it. And she hates why she'll never tell him why.

Pam/Alex! (not me, the one from the show)


Categories: Jim and Pam, Present, Episode Related
Characters: Jim/Pam, Other, Pam/Other
Genres: Angst, Romance
Warnings: Adult language, Mild sexual content
Series: None
Chapters: 9 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 12043 Read Count: 21645 ePub Downloads: 0
[Report This] Published: January 08, 2009 Updated: February 10, 2009
Argh! My Eyes!!! by Alex Wert Rated: M [Reviews - 10]
Summary: Andy and Angela get it on in 5 parts.

Categories: Other
Characters: Andy, Angela
Genres: Horror, Humor, Steamy
Warnings: Adult language, Moderate sexual content
Series: None
Chapters: 5 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 4689 Read Count: 3072 ePub Downloads: 0
[Report This] Published: March 15, 2008 Updated: November 06, 2008
Karen the Kidnapper by Alex Wert Rated: M [Reviews - 50] 12
Summary:

After being dumped by Jim, Karen tries to take back control of her life... by kidnapping Jim! What nefarious plans does Karen have in store for him? Can Pam rescue Jim before Karen makes him a castrati? Why is Dwight obsessed with semen? All this and more inside! You'd think that maybe it'd be more of a crime drama than anything else, but I'm voting for the anything else.

And how come there's no option for Genres:Twisted? I'd use that.


Categories: Jim and Pam, Present
Characters: Dwight, Jim/Pam, Karen
Genres: Angst, Humor
Warnings: Adult language, Dubious Consent, Other Adult Theme, Violence/Injury
Series: None
Chapters: 12 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 11277 Read Count: 15815 ePub Downloads: 3
[Report This] Published: July 04, 2007 Updated: November 14, 2007
Dunder Mifflin After Evers by Alex Wert Rated: K+ [Reviews - 13] 2
Summary: The cast gets their epilogues in this piece that further proves that I have lost my mind.  Also, I am aware of the grammatical error in my title, however that was apparently the way that I wrote the name when I saved the file on Friday.  So I thought I'd leave it as is just to show that my brain has broken.
Categories: Other, Future
Characters: Ensemble
Genres: Angst, Humor, Oneshot, Parody, Romance, Slash
Warnings: Mild sexual content
Challenges: Bad Fanfic
Series: None
Chapters: 1 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 522 Read Count: 2745 ePub Downloads: 0
[Report This] Published: July 31, 2007 Updated: July 31, 2007
[Expletive Deleted] Jim! by Alex Wert Rated: M [Reviews - 16] 3
Summary:

Karen has her heart broken by Jim and then... KaPAM!

We interrupt our regularly scheduled chapter to bring you gratuitous smut and cheap laughs.


Categories: Other, Present
Characters: Jim, Karen, Pam
Genres: Angst, Romance, Slash
Warnings: Adult language, Mild sexual content
Series: None
Chapters: 5 Table of Contents
Completed: No Word count: 9954 Read Count: 5666 ePub Downloads: 0
[Report This] Published: February 17, 2007 Updated: July 08, 2007
New York, New York by Alex Wert Rated: M [Reviews - 9] 3
Summary:

It's Monday morning, and Ryan wakes up in the city that never sleeps. Can he make it there? Can he make it anywhere? It's up to you, New York, New York.


Categories: Other, Present
Characters: David Wallace, Hunter, Other, Ryan
Genres: Angst, Slash
Warnings: Adult language, Moderate sexual content
Series: None
Chapters: 1 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 4155 Read Count: 1097 ePub Downloads: 0
[Report This] Published: June 07, 2007 Updated: June 07, 2007
Isosceles by Alex Wert Rated: M [Reviews - 4] 2
Summary:

Jim's sham relationship is over. True love has carried the day once again. Karen doesn't take it at all well. Not your typical Office fic, and I mean it.


Categories: Jim and Pam, Episode Related
Characters: Ensemble
Genres: Angst
Warnings: Violence/Injury
Series: None
Chapters: 1 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 2027 Read Count: 1872 ePub Downloads: 1
[Report This] Published: June 01, 2007 Updated: June 01, 2007
Nightmare (Starring: God and a character from The Simpsons) by Alex Wert Rated: T [Reviews - 6] 2
Summary:

Sometimes Karen feels like everyone hates her...

(Another jab by me vs. all those Jammers out there).


Categories: Other, Present
Characters: Jim, Karen
Genres: Angst, Humor, Oneshot, Parody
Warnings: Violence/Injury
Series: None
Chapters: 1 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 502 Read Count: 1587 ePub Downloads: 0
[Report This] Published: May 16, 2007 Updated: May 16, 2007
I've Had A Bad Day/Week/Month/Year by Alex Wert Rated: T [Reviews - 3]
Summary: Four Dunder-Mifflinites lament their troubled times.  That sounds rather ominous, doesn't it?  Cue suspenseful music!  Or not...
Categories: Other, Present, Episode Related
Characters: Andy, Karen, Madge, Roy, Stanley
Genres: Angst, Fluff, Humor, Oneshot
Warnings: Adult language
Series: None
Chapters: 1 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 476 Read Count: 2394 ePub Downloads: 0
[Report This] Published: May 14, 2007 Updated: May 14, 2007
Pam Who? by Alex Wert Rated: T [Reviews - 12] 2
Summary:

In which Alex Wert attempts to generate hate mail and death threats. Karen wins. Pam loses. Jim is happy.


Categories: Future
Characters: Jim, Jim/Other, Karen, Pam
Genres: Angst, Fluff, Oneshot
Warnings: Other Adult Theme
Series: None
Chapters: 1 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 1162 Read Count: 3377 ePub Downloads: 0
[Report This] Published: May 07, 2007 Updated: May 07, 2007
CATFIGHT!!! by Alex Wert Rated: T [Reviews - 5] 1
Summary:

I've come to the conclusion that the show needs Krazy!Karen. If she's sane then she makes the whole love triangle thing far too depressing for a comedy show. If she's nuts then pretty much anything can happen, and it's bound to be interesting.  Especially if she's violent.


Categories: Other, Present
Characters: Creed, Jim, Karen, Pam
Genres: Humor, Oneshot
Warnings: Adult language, Other Adult Theme, Violence/Injury
Series: None
Chapters: 1 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 1129 Read Count: 2582 ePub Downloads: 0
[Report This] Published: April 20, 2007 Updated: April 20, 2007
The Austrian Vagrant by Alex Wert Rated: K+ [Reviews - 4]
Summary:

If the highlight of your artshow is the response of Michael Gary Scott, and you're thankful for that, it officially means you've hit rock bottom.

Luckily for you, Dwight K. Schrute is there to help.


Categories: Other, Present, Episode Related
Characters: Dwight, Pam
Genres: Dream/Fantasy, Fluff, Humor
Warnings: No Warnings Apply
Series: None
Chapters: 1 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 712 Read Count: 1228 ePub Downloads: 0
[Report This] Published: March 26, 2007 Updated: March 26, 2007
Catching Teh Gay: 5 Times Something Queer Happens In The Office That Have Nothing To Do With Oscar by Alex Wert Rated: M [Reviews - 10] 2
Summary:

Angela is worried about the upcoming Gay Epidemic now that Oscar has been outed and has returned to the office after his gaycation.


Categories: Present, Episode Related
Characters: Angela, Creed, Dwight, Jim, Karen, Meredith, Other, Pam, Phyllis, Todd Packer
Genres: Humor, Oneshot, Slash, Steamy
Warnings: Adult language, Dubious Consent, Moderate sexual content
Series: None
Chapters: 1 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 2627 Read Count: 1530 ePub Downloads: 1
[Report This] Published: March 19, 2007 Updated: March 19, 2007
5 Times (out of many) That Karen Considers Doing Something Drastic by Alex Wert Rated: T [Reviews - 14] 4
Summary: Does anyone bother writing a summary for a 5 Things fic? What's the point?  I mean, it's pretty much all there in the title, isn't it?  So I'm just going to fill this space.  Cantaloupes.
Categories: Other
Characters: Dwight, Jim, Karen
Genres: Humor
Warnings: Violence/Injury
Series: None
Chapters: 1 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 775 Read Count: 3575 ePub Downloads: 2
[Report This] Published: March 06, 2007 Updated: March 06, 2007
The Substitutes by Alex Wert Rated: M [Reviews - 3] 1
Summary:

Some might say he finally got a lucky break. He's not so sure. Toby gets what he wanted, but it's not what he envisioned. Toby/Pam with a little Jim/Karen.

Dark.


Categories: Other, Present
Characters: Jim, Karen, Pam, Toby
Genres: Angst
Warnings: Adult language, Mild sexual content
Series: None
Chapters: 1 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 1209 Read Count: 887 ePub Downloads: 0
[Report This] Published: February 10, 2007 Updated: February 10, 2007