1 [Report This]Date: August 29, 2020 03:25 pm Title: Chapter 2
Aww Jim. I liked how you took the same sports detail here but used it differently. Good work.
1 [Report This]Date: August 29, 2020 01:29 pm Title: Chapter 2
“Their lives were so entangled and intertwined, that it was difficult to decipher what was love and what was routine and comfort.” This. Yes. This cuts right at the heart of Pam and Roy...
Oh, it’s such a sad comparison to have Mark immediately mute the game and give his full attention to Jim. Lovely for Jim, but so very sad for Pam.
Welcome back! I’m looking forward to seeing where you go with this.
1 [Report This]Date: August 29, 2020 01:12 pm Title: Chapter 2
I love the parallels between Roy and Mark's reactions here. Looking forward to seeing what you come up with next.
Welcome back!
Author's Response: Thank you! :)
Date: August 29, 2020 11:28 am Title: Chapter 2
Oof Jim, you're reeling here. Which of course makes total sense. He's just been kicked twice. Again, great job getting those feelings out in a very real way on the page. This chapter seemed like a good counterpoint to the first one. Jim comes home and rather than being blown off, Mark mutes the TV and is there for Jim. Looking at it like that one can get a sense of why Jim found the courage to tell Pam what he did while Pam kept hiding her feelings. Jim has support, Pam doesn't really.
Can't wait to see where we go from here.
Author's Response: Thank you for the review! :)