“Now, let’s see… do we watch the Friday night Full House-a-thon on TV Land or Murder She Wrote back to back on Hallmark?” Jim asked as he shed his shoes and started to settle down into the couch. He patted the spot to his left as she shuffled past him. “What will it be?”
“Full House,” Pam called out from her bedroom as she put her shoes and cardigan away. “Gotta love John Stamos back in the day.”
On her way back into the living room, Pam snagged the remote off the top of her bookshelf and settled down next to Jim. “Or not,” she said, trying a few different buttons on her remote. “Looks like that’s out of the question, I guess the cable’s out again.” Pam tossed the remote onto the coffee table in front of them.
They sat there together on the couch, cuddled together against the worn left arm. Jim’s arm wrapped around her shoulders, his fingers toying with the ends of her curls. Pam sighed lightly, dropping her head back against him.
“So much for that plan,” she explained. “I know, so not the rest of the evening we had in mind...” Jim put a finger over her lips. “Hey, hey now none of that. You and me, not in the confines of Dunder-Mifflin, that makes it great no matter what,” he said, reaching for the smaller remote on the end table next to the couch. “Music?” he asked as he flicked on her speakers.
Find me here; speak to me. I need to feel you; I need to hear you. You are the light that’s leading me to the place where I find peace again started to come through the speakers, Jim singing along with the lyrics under his breath, barely audible to Pam.
They had been looking for a song on Jim’s iTunes to use in their latest prank on Andy when she came across the song. Pam put her hand over his on the mouse, preventing him from moving to the next song on the list. “I need this one,” she said softly and leaning her head against his. “It’s good.”
“Ahh that’s the one,” he said as he stood up off the couch and placed the remote down. “Exactly what I was looking for.” He held out his hand, tugging her up off the couch and into his arms.
“This time it will be dancing,” Jim whispered lightly into Pam’s ear as he held her close, moving slowly along with the music.
Without another thought, without hesitation, the words escaped Pam’s lips before she even realized it, “God, I love you.”
He stopped for a moment to catch his breath and tilted his head back to look into her eyes.
The look on his face, the pause in their movements sent Pam into a bit of a tailspin of slight panic. What did I do wrong? Did I say it too soon after everything, did I say I too late? Oh god he doesn’t feel it that way anymore she thought to herself as she searched his eyes for some read of him.
Pam had thought she was ready. It brought her back months before when she had just moved out, in her apartment alone with her two friends Ben and Jerry, watching “Never Been Kissed”. Drew Barrymore pouring her heart and soul out into her column, telling Michael Vartan she loved him, asking, almost begging him to meet her – and he never showed. Pam shut the movie off in disgust, hugging her knees to her chest and just continued what seemed to be the never-ending waterfall of tears and hurt.
She felt like she was stuck in that movie, she was reliving Drew Barrymore’s heartbreak in her own little world. Pam stutters out barely, “Jim, you know what, never…”
Jim cut her off her rambling, placing two fingers over her lips, “Pam, stop. You can’t…don’t be afraid.” She looked at him quizzically, with a touch of fear lingering in her eyes. He slid his fingers away from her lips to stroke her cheek lightly. “Ok, so I know you may have heard this before, but I’m going to say it again. I love you, I’m so in love with you.”
Her breath came rushing back into her lungs and she released what sounded like half cry half laugh. She lifted her head to look Jim in the eyes. “I do,” she said, watching as his eyes slowly changed in color, become more intense as they fixed on her. “Love you. More than I could every put into words. I think even more than I can even realize. You’re what I’ve been looking for even when I thought I had already found my forever. I don’t want anyone other than you. I love you, Jim.”
“Can you, would you mind saying that again,” he said in a sigh, leaning his forehead against hers, drawing her closer to him. “I promise this time won’t be as nerve racking for you.”
“I love you,” she whispered, her lips a whisper away from his. Pam felt his breath, a cooling mist against her lips, felt his heart starting to race against her chest. Jim slid a hand slowly from around her waist, up her arm to bury his fingers in curls at the base of her neck.
“I love you too Pam, I love you too,” Jim before bringing his lips to meet hers. The tingling returned, not creeping this time, but a full tidal wave rush over her body. Their kiss didn’t grow in intensity; it exploded like fireworks in bold splashes across the sky.
Pam lightly pulled away from Jim’s lips, smiling as she saw the look of sheer happiness etched across his face. She began a trail of butterfly kisses over his face, whispering ‘I love you’ after each one. Jim sighed contently; shifting to rub his hands up and down her back lightly as she worked her lips across his skin. She slowly made her way over the planes of his face, sliding to his ear and down the slope of his neck and back up again. “I don’t think I’ll ever get sick of telling you how much I love you,” Pam said before bringing their lips back together again.
“Stay tonight,” she asked, as they pulled apart for some much needed air, lacing her hand with his. A half smile spread across Jim’s face as he nodded in agreement. He knew what she meant. He slid his hand into hers, and after brushing the top of her hand with a kiss, Jim felt Pam tugging on his hand and leading him down the narrow hallway towards the warm glow of her room.
