Author's Note: I'm very very sorry for the ridiculous delay, and I hope there are some of you out there still interested in the conclusion of this little story of mine. In my defense, I had to relocate 5000 miles and have been quite busy handling foreign government bureaucracies. Fun! The last chapter is 1/2 written so it should be up by weekend. Thanks again for reading!
***After a long minute, Dwight broke the silence that followed the Doctor’s entrance. “I know something about an explosion,” he said slowly, triumphantly smirking at Pam. Pam confidently smirked back at him, forcing his sly little grin to falter a bit.
“Ah yes, Dwight. That does not surprise me.” The Doctor perched himself on the corner of Dwight’s desk. “Please share.”
Dwight worriedly looked back at Pam, whose smile had graduated to a full out beam. She was rocking back and forth on her heels, throwing nervous glances in the direction of the main office entrance. Dwight looked back at the Doctor curiously.
“Wait a minute, why are you British too? Foreigners can’t work for American government agencies. Let me see that badge. ”
“Mmm, perceptive as well. I can see nothing makes it past you.” The Doctor dug back through his pockets and offered the paper badge to Dwight.
“This is blank.”
“No it isn’t,” said Phyllis, peering from over Dwight’s shoulder. She smiled shyly at the Doctor. “It says Officer John Smith of the Department of Labor Safety.”
“Officer John Smith. Seriously?” asked Karen doubtfully. Pam scowled at the back of her head.
“That is what it says.” Jim shrugged from next to Karen’s desk.
“I didn’t even know the Department of Labor had Officers.” Karen frowned.
“Oh, they do,” interrupted Pam. “Big ceremony. They induct you after surviving basic training.”
“It gets televised once a year. I think it’s carried by a CNN channel,” Jim said.
“Yeah, CNN the Ocho,” Pam added.
Karen frowned at both Jim and Pam. “Ok, what exactly is going on here –ouch!”
Karen rubbed her arm while glaring up at Jim, who was looking around the office with a wide-eyed smile.
“Karen’s right,” Dwight said, while inching toward the Doctor. “And either way, that piece of paper is blank.”
“Is it?” asked the Doctor casually as he slid off the desk and snagged the paper out of Dwight’s hand. He began to back toward the kitchen.
“Please,” Dwight said, rolling his eyes, “my grandfather trained me in four different types of ancient mind control the summer after the Incident. Is this some kind of British conspiracy? Are the two of you working together?”
The Doctor rubbed his forehead in exasperation. “What? No. I’m just trying to follow up on a possible explosion, for safety reasons. Now, should I go write up Dunder Mifflin for failing to cooperate with a federal investigation? I didn’t think so,” he said confidently as he continued to walk towards the kitchen. He had just reached the door when he spun around, “Wait, hold on. What did you mean by two? Has Donna wandered in here? Blimey, the woman said she was happy to stay put and catch up on some telly this time out. She’s probably in lock up somewhere by now. Bloody jeopardy friendly I say, every single one of them.”
Pam raised her eyebrows. “Um, what? Sorry, but who exactly is Donna?”
“Actually I think Dwight was referring to Carly,” offered Jim, overemphasizing the name.
The Doctor scrunched up his nose. “Who is Carly?”
Jim gave Pam a concerned look, and she responded with a reassuring shrug.
“She’s the new British temp, and the second hottest visitor we’ve ever had… ever,” piped in Kevin.
“Wait, who was the first?” asked Oscar.
“The purse girl, though Carly’s accent is really hot. She could yell at you, and order you around and make you do things. Like the Queen.”
“Wow, I had no idea you had such a fetish for British royalty Kevin.”
“Jim, you have no idea.”
“Katy was really pretty,” said Phyllis, turning to Karen. “Sorry.”
“Why are you sorry? Who is Katy?”
“Hey, marry, kill, boink,” oozed Kevin, “Katy, Carly or Pam?”
“Absolutely not,” interrupted Angela, shaking her head.
“Pamela!” cried Creed, with a fist pump.
Oscar rolled his eyes. “Kevin, we’ve been over this before. I don’t like girls and this is incredibly inappropriate.”
“Also, I’m standing right here,” Pam interjected.
“Katy,” threw out Ryan.
“I really think I would take Carly, because it might be weird to have Jim’s leftovers. I mean, I would take them, but not as my first choice. Sorry Karen, you’re still really hot too,” Kevin said thoughtfully.
“Wait, what?” Karen said spinning around in her chair.
“PAM AND CARLY SET OFF AN EXPLOSION IN THE PARKING LOT.” Dwight blurted out loudly.
Silence fell over the office as everyone turned to look at Pam.
She bit her lip and waved awkwardly. “Well thanks for that Dwight. Guys, it wasn’t really an explosion. It was more like an experiment. And everything is fine.”
“Oh, you best not have messed up my brand new car,” growled Stanley as he pushed his way toward the conference room.
The Doctor let out a triumphant whooping noise and had just bounced after Stanley when the main entrance of Dunder Mifflin squeaked open.
A loud whisper came from somewhere in the front hallway. “Pam? Pam! I need some help. The dry ice is attacking.”
Pam shrugged as everyone again turned to look at her.
The voice came a little louder as Rose turned the corner into the main room, her hair wildly disheveled and the sleeve of her jacket slightly torn. She was dragging a large cooler that seemed to be shaking violently and fighting against her efforts. “Seriously, Pam,” she said exasperatedly, “A little help?”
Pam cleared her throat awkwardly and Rose finally looked up to see the whole office staring at her peculiarly.
“Oh, right. Hello again! Right, this must look a bit odd.” Rose let out a deep breath, blowing a stray piece of hair out of her face.
A loud crashing noise came from the conference room. “Pamela Beesly, what in holy hell did you do to my car?” Stanley roared as he came storming out. “I hope for your sake that you have some kind of secret trust fund set up because if you think I am paying to repair that paint job, you are sorely mistaken.”
“I have to say,” said the Doctor as he came bounding out from behind Stanley, “I think the color selection is rather inspired. You know that in ancient Anlucarra, purple and pink were used as a third degree battle cry.” He furrowed his brow and tugged on his right sideburn. “Which, come to think of it, usually ended in widespread decapitation.”
Pam looked over at Rose, who had dropped the still shaking cooler onto the floor and was standing very still. Pam watched as her smile turned into a grin, and that grin turned into radiance, and the radiance was joined with huge, blindingly joyful laughter.
Everyone turned to look at her.
Pam turned to look at the Doctor.
Any doubts she may have had about the man’s identity vanished completely, as the look on his face so completely matched the one on Rose’s that Pam could see them both in it. She caught Jim’s eye, and nodded shyly at him.
“Well, hello,” breathed out the Doctor.
“Hello,” said Rose, still brimming with laughter.
The two were staring at each other so intently that neither seemed to see Dwight sneaking up behind the Doctor with a long length of rope.
Just as Pam was about to call out a warning she saw the Doctor reach into his pocket and pull out small pen-like device. Without once taking his eyes of Rose he aimed the device at Dwight and a soft hum filled the office.
“What? What are you doing? I knew you were working together! And that isn’t a licensed weapon! I am the official security supervisor of this branch! I can write up a warning!” yelled Dwight as the rope began its revolt against him, pushing him back into his chair and tying him up securely.
“Eh, considering I am here investigating an explosion, perhaps someone isn’t doing his job all that well.”
Dwight let out a gasp and narrowed his eyes, still struggling against the rope, which for a non-sentient entity seemed rather entertained by his fruitless struggles. “Who are you?”
The Doctor finally tore his eyes away from Rose and looked directly at Dwight. “I’m the Doctor. And I fix things.”
He looked over at Jim, “In Dunder Mifflin PA, I sometimes thought you could be rather cruel, that the pranks seemed excessive at times. I must admit, I understand a bit better now.”
Jim shrugged. “It’s cool man. Sometimes I think I should stop myself, try to lighten up a bit,” he frowned over at Dwight who scowled back at him, “But he always manages to test my resolve.”
“Wait,” interjected Rose. “Hold on, Dunder Mifflin PA? It’s The Office here. I know, I checked.”
The Doctor turned back to face Rose, though he seemed set on looking everywhere but her face.
“We-e-ll…I’ve been spending some time in Pete’s World...”
Rose’s mouth dropped open.
“With the stars going out I was able to squeeze through using a cascade harness. Don’t know why I didn’t think of it earlier. And well, I just wanted to see if, erm, whether the problem with the stars was on your end. I’ve got to go fix that still, by the way. A retroactive closure loop should do the trick, unless… So yes, I thought I’d check up, you know, pop in and say hi.”
“Hmm, retroactive closure loops can be tricky, like that one I dealt with back in ’67. Make sure to use an electron stabler as a counter balance,” Creed added, taking a large bite out of a tomato.
“You crossed through to Pete’s World, just to say hi? And somehow managed to find time to watch Dunder Mifflin?” Rose asked skeptically.
“Oh, I suppose I also wanted to see what you were up to, if you might want to come back. I mean, if you weren’t too settled in with your new life, or with Mr. Mickey or something. And then,” said the Doctor pulling on his hair, “Well, I actually stayed with your family for a bit.
“You what?”
“It seemed logical! You weren’t there but everyone seemed so sure you were going to call and it seemed best to wait around.”
“You waited around for me, at my parent’s house. For how long?”
“Oh I don’t know. About a month? Lots to teach Tony. Drove your mum a bit mad I suspect. Oi! Don’t look at me like that. It’s not like I slept in one of the guest bedrooms or something.”
Rose raised her eyebrows.
The Doctor rubbed his neck and gazed intently at a fleck on the ceiling. In a smaller voice he added, “Pete let me park the TARDIS in the dining room. Close to the kitchen and all that. Pete said Dunder Mifflin PA was your favorite, so I watched that, and then the 6th season of Arrested Development. Built a spare screwdriver for Tony. It all worked out fine.”
“You came back to get me?” Rose asked quietly.
“Well of course. Always said I would. I’d given up there for awhile, but Donna said some quite nasty things about me being sulky and codependent and she insisted on staying in this London until I made some progress finding you. I had to promise to come back for her within a few days. Don’t know why she’s still so mad that it was two weeks. That’s downright on time when you think about it.”
“Who exactly is this Donna?” Pam asked.
The Doctor glanced back at Pam. “Oh Donna’s my traveling friend. My best mate, I suppose. Though don’t tell her that.”
“You came back to get me.” Rose said in a louder voice.
The Doctor frowned sheepishly. “That’s alright, isn’t it? I mean, I assumed, since you weren’t there, and then they told me about the dimension canon. And well I assumed you wouldn’t mind…”
Rose started laughing. “I exploded nail polish all over the parking lot to get back to you.”
“You can help pay for my car then,” Stanley grumbled.
“You were coming back?” asked the Doctor with a hopeful smile.
“I am back,” said Rose with an answering grin. “Hello Doctor.”
“Hello Rose. I think I’ve done this all wrong.” And with that, the Doctor leapt across the room and swept her up, wrapping his arms around her and lifting her off the ground. He swung her back and forth with a swallowed giggle and Rose buried her face in his shoulder, the two clinging to each other with their eyes closed.
“I guess I’ll have to take Katy after all,” sighed Kevin.
The Doctor set Rose down while keeping one hand cupped against her cheek. Rose grinned and pulled him down gently with a hand on either side of his face. She softly kissed his forehead and he beamed back at her, smoothing out her tousled hair and tucking a stray strand behind her ear.
Pam tore her eyes away upon the sinking realization that the persistent scuffling noise coming from the cooler had stopped. “Sorry, but Carly? Or Rose, I guess. Um, where did that cooler go? You said dry ice was attacking?” Rose looked around with a worried expression, still not releasing the Doctor.
Michael chose that moment to barge out of his office. “Pam. Pam! Something is wrong with Harvey. He’s been possessed.”
Pam looked at Michael, and then looked pointedly at the Doctor and Rose.
Michael frowned at the embracing pair. “How dare you madam? I’ll have you know,” Michael said to the Doctor, “Your girlfriend made quite the pass at me this morning.”
“I’m not-“ Rose started.
“Did she then?” The Doctor interrupted, wrapping his arm around her waist. “Blast, I was hoping to get that chance myself.” Rose grinned up at the Doctor and he pulled her back into a hug.
“Ew gross. PDA ALERT! God, Pam, can you come help me?”
Pam sighed. “Michael, what exactly is wrong with your computer?”
“Harvey, I think he’s possessed.” Michael pushed open the door to his office and Pam could almost make out the words coming from Michael’s computer. An eerie silence fell over the room, as everyone strained to hear.
Slowly, the words could be made out, a computerized voice calling into the silence in escalating tones, “Bad Wolf. Bad Wolf. Bad Wolf. Bad Wolf. Bad Wolf. Bad Wolf. BAD WOLF. BAD WOLF. BAD WOLF. BAD WOLF. BADWOLF BADWOLF BADWOLF BADWOLF”
The overhead lights flickered off and by the time the emergency lights powered up, the words BAD WOLF had taken over the office, every computer screen, every poster. The computerized voice was now screaming from Michael’s office.
“BADWOLFBADWOLFBADWOLFBADWOLFBADWOLFBADWOLFBADWOLF”
The noise was joined by the murmur of panicking voices as everyone tripped their way towards the center of the office.
Rose looked up at the Doctor and then over at Pam. “Everyone! Everyone, please stay calm. I apologize for lying to you earlier but my name is actually Rose, and I’m not really a temp. This here is the Doctor. You all are Dunder Mifflin, and we’ve got trouble. Conference room… right now. ”
***
