The pink dress lay on the floor discarded and forgotten, not far from the bed. I lay on the bed curled up tightly in a slight daze, my half opened eyes fixated on the dress, entranced by the simplicity of how it folded and rested so delicately on the floor. The dark pink fabric, illuminated by the moonlight streaming through the window, mesmerized me with its beauty.
I remembered faintly the first time I had worn that dress. It was a bridesmaid’s dress, picked out by a third cousin on my mother’s side for a wedding that had happened almost three years ago. She had needed a fourth for her bridal party and had asked me because she had no one else. I had accepted graciously, but the day of the wedding as I stood up at the alter gazing at the happy bride and groom, I felt a strange sense of loneliness sweep over me. The dress, along with my place in line, was a reminder of how far I was from my own possible happy ending.
Never in a million years did I believe I might use it as my own wedding dress someday. A smile came to my lips as I thought about how I nearly got married today…
* * *
I got up late that morning, feeling groggy and unwilling to go to work. Reluctantly I pulled myself out of bed, sliding on my slippers as I did so. In a mirror in the hallway, I caught a glimpse of my image. My eyes were red and watery, my contacts had been bothering me some lately and although I knew I should go in and get a new prescription, we didn’t have the money right now, so I would have to put that on hold. My hair had been in a ponytail but after sleeping on it, most of the hair had fallen out of the hair tie. I took a second to brush it back against my head but it only flopped back down against my face.
I wandered into the kitchen where Jim was sitting at the table, slowly scooping up cereal as he read the guest list for the wedding, which we had been going over last night, hoping to come to some sort of final count. Every time we thought we had finished, some one new, whom we just had to invite, would come to mind. Neither of us wanted a big wedding but we also didn’t have the heart to not include anyone.
“Morning,” I said, giving him a swift kiss on the temple before heading to the fridge.
“Hey,” he said grabbing my hand before I could get away, pulling me in for a soft kiss. I smiled as we broke. “So I was going over this list again,” he explained as I went to the cupboard to retrieve a bowl. “Are you sure your great aunt and uncle who live in Florida are coming?”
“I don’t know,” I said with a sigh as I placed the bowl on the counter and reached into a drawer to grab a spoon. “I mean, we have to invite them even if they don’t. I don’t think they will come. I haven’t seen them since I was a little girl, but mom insisted that we invite extended family so they don’t feel excluded.”
“Well, at least we get more free stuff this way,” Jim replied.
I laughed as I opened the fridge to get out the milk. “That reminds me, we should probably get around to registering this weekend,” I said as I poured the milk into the bowl.
“Yeah, probably,” his voice was low, hesitant. He had something on his mind that was worrying him.
“What?” I asked, putting the milk back in the fridge.
“I was looking at these numbers,” he said, referring back to the lists on the table. “Pam, I think we’re going to have to get a bigger hall if we want to include everyone. I don’t want to force two-hundred fifty people in a place that only seats one-hundred.”
I gave him a lopsided smile because I knew what that meant. The hall we had now was reasonably priced but to go bigger would put a cramp in our budget. Between the mortgage and the fact that I didn’t have a stable job for a month meant we were tight on money and we were trying to cut wedding costs as much as possible. “So, what do you want to do?”
He watched as I stood on my toes to reach the cereal located on the top of the fridge, my shirt rising as I stretched. Out of the corner of my eye I saw a devilish grin form across his lips as he stared at the bare skin now revealed. I knew that look, I enjoyed that look though it still caused me to become flustered and when I finally grabbed the cereal, I knocked down the wicker basket holding fruit on the floor. I set down the cereal on the counter and knelt down to pick up the apples that had rolled on the ground.
Jim let out an amused laugh but kindly let my klutziness go. “I don’t want to exclude people. It may get a little tight, but since we haven’t put a down payment on the hall we originally wanted, it wouldn’t hurt to look around again.”
I shrugged my shoulders as I joined him at the table with my cereal. It had taken us two months to find a hall we somewhat liked. The idea of having to go through that again wasn’t appealing. “You know, we could always take Andy’s advice and just have a giant tent,” I only half-joked.
I reached over to grab one of the lists, thinking maybe there were some people we didn’t have to invite. In the process, I knocked into my cereal bowl, a bit of milk spilling on the table. I really had no coordination today, I thought as I let go of the list to grab a napkin to clean up my mess. Jim said nothing as I wiped up the mess, leaving the soggy napkin in a clump next to my bowl.
“You know what I want to do today?” he asked finally, tilting his head, deep in thought. At first I thought it was about the wedding. Then I wondered if he had a prank on Dwight in mind, one to get him back for that cruel prank he had pulled on me yesterday with Erin pretending to win an art contest. But when I looked into his eyes, I saw a deep intensity there and I couldn’t tell what was on his mind. “I want to marry you,” he said simply.
My cheeks immediately flushed. Here I was, unkempt, spilling things everywhere, and all he could think about was wanting to marry me. “Let’s do it,” I suggested quickly, wanting nothing more then to be his wife in that moment.
“What?” He was a little shocked at my enthusiasm. “Really?”
“Yeah,” I said excitedly, thinking how wonderful it would be to elope. “I have this old bridesmaid’s dress I could wear and we could find a place where we could get a marriage license today.”
“Alright then,” he said, pulling me out of my chair and on to his lap. He brushed the hair out of my face and gave me a loving smile. “Let’s get married.”
“Let’s get married,” I whispered, leaning down to give him a lingering kiss.
* * *
Actually eloping proved to be harder than just the idea. I remembered that in order to get a marriage license we had to wait three days. Jim persisted, though, and after searching all morning on the internet and being late for work, we found a place in Ohio where we could obtain a marriage license in one day. We figured that if we left right after lunch there would be enough time to drive there and return home so we could be at work the next day. We looked at hotels just in case something happened and we had to stay over. I suggested to Jim we take the next day off anyway, Michael would believe any excuse. I wanted to spend the first day of our marriage alone with my new husband.
Finding the dress was an easier task. It had been stuffed in the back of a storage closet in the basement. I wore the dress to work, covering it up with a pink sweater. The dress was tighter than it had been, which worried me some, but still looked nice on me. Since the dress had been in storage for so long, I itched everywhere and had to cover the musty smell with perfume.
When I walked in that morning, Meredith didn’t hesitate to comment on how I stunk, which I felt was hypocritical since she smelled of old booze all the time. She wouldn’t be the only one who had remarks to be said. Kelly cornered me near the copier and gave me a lecture on why certain pinks don’t match. Angela kept giving me looks of disapproval and didn’t hesitate to mention that the type of dress I was wearing was inappropriate. After the casual Friday fiasco last week, she had been persistent about the dress code.
The guys were just as bad. Kevin and Creed gave me lingering stares, which made me feel uncomfortable. Dwight had outright laughed when I sat down that morning as if he knew anything about fashion. Ryan made the snarky comment that I was too old for prom and later I overheard him talking on his cell, mentioning to his friend that I had bumped down to a five.
Luckily, Michael had been so preoccupied with his café disco idea he had no idea what Jim and I were planning and didn’t make one off-hand remark about my outfit. In fact, he was so desperate to have someone to eat lunch with him, he repeatedly told me how nice I looked.
At least the new receptionist, Erin, had been kind enough to say I looked original and quirky. I wasn’t sure if she meant it, but it was nice not to be hassled from one person in the office.
Normally all of this would bug me, but I was too giddy to care. Every time I looked at Jim, I couldn’t contain myself and a broad grin would stretch across my lips. We tried to play it low key, especially because of the cameras being there, but when they found us out, it was such a relief to tell someone.
* * *
Not long after lunch, I decided to get ready to go. Everyone, with the exception of Dwight who was doing who knows what to Phyllis in the conference room and Stanley who was sleeping, was downstairs enjoying Michael’s disco party, which made it easier for Jim and I to skip out of there unnoticed.
I had brought a few supplies with me to do my hair and went into the bathroom to put together the finishing touches. The time had come for us to actually leave for Ohio and I still couldn’t believe we had decided to elope. I was so anxious that I could barely put the bobby pins in my hair. They kept slipping out of my hands and one even went down the drain. After I had finished with my hair, I reapplied a little bit of make-up and I was ready to go.
As I stared at my reflection in the mirror, my heart rate sped up. I couldn’t believe this was happening, that we were actually getting married. I clutched on to the sink for a moment to take a few deep breaths. I was so nervous I was shaking and my stomach turned in knots. A flash back of waiting for Jim on our first date came flooding back as the feeling was very much the same.
Music from Michael’s disco floated up through the vent, a fast paced tune, which helped cause my excitement to grow.
I finally left the bathroom. Jim was there; he had been pacing, just as nervous as I was. When he saw me there was a twinkle in his eye, it caused a warm, tingly sensation to flow through me. “These are for you,” he said handing me a bouquet of flowers. I recognized them as the ones that grew just outside the business park and it made me fall in love with him just a little bit more.
“Thank you,” I replied sincerely. “They’re beautiful.”
“You ready?”
As ready as I could ever be. “Yeah,” I breathed. Jim’s hand brushed down my arm, clasping onto my own hand. It comforted me that his hand was as sweaty as mine.
We walked silently, hand in hand, grinning like idiots, over to the elevator.
“I love you,” Jim said sweetly as we waited for the elevator.
The elevator gave a ding and the doors glided open. “I love you, too,” I responded, pulling him inside.
Once we were inside, away from the cameras, Jim bent down to give me a gentle kiss. I slipped one arm around his neck to pull him in for a deeper, more passionate kiss. He kissed back just as hard and I could feel his love right down to my toes. But before we could take it any further the elevator arrived on the ground floor and we were forced to break apart.
The elevator dinged again and the doors opened. It was time to go.
* * *
We couldn’t not stop into Michael’s disco before we left and it made his day when we showed up. The entire office was crammed into that tiny room, but no one seemed to care, that we were stuffed in there, running into each other, expect maybe Angela. Everyone was jumping around, dancing, having a great time and it was hard not to be quickly sucked up in the energetic atmosphere.
Soon, Jim and I were bouncing around as well, showing off our dorkier sides, not caring that our coworkers were there with us because they were being just as dorky. I loved Michael’s disco more than I anticipated. I loved the string of Christmas lights around the pipe, the tiny disco ball that hung against the wall, the ridiculously silly music that Michael had put together on a mixed CD and most of all I loved that Jim was here with me, partaking in this craziness.
I wanted my own wedding reception to be just like this but then I realized if we eloped tonight, we wouldn’t have a wedding reception. I suddenly wanted my parents to be with me when I got married, Jim’s as well. And my sister and Jim’s brothers and that third cousin who’s wedding I went to years ago. I even wanted Michael to be there, even if that was a bit risky.
Then I began thinking of all the other things I’d be missing out on, a real ceremony, a banquet afterward, a cake, and a first slow dance as husband and wife. I wanted a first night in an elegant hotel, not a first night spent driving home from Ohio. And I wanted to wear a real dress, not this pink thing that could have been worn at a high school prom.
I looked up at Jim as all of these realizations came crashing into me at once. As much as I wanted to marry him, I wanted to celebrate our love the right way.
Y.M.C.A. blasted through the speakers. Jim informed Michael that we would be staying a little while longer and I wondered if he was coming to the same conclusions I was.
“This is so cheesy,” I commented.
“Yes,” he agreed definitely.
“I like cheesy,” I admitted, letting him know with my tone that this is what I wanted.
“Me too,” he agreed easily.
“I think…” I stuttered, a little nervous to actually say it. “Maybe, I want a wedding wedding.”
“Me too,” he assured me.
“Really?”
“Yeah.”
My heart skipped a beat as we embraced.
* * *
We stayed for the duration of the disco party, dancing around and having a great time. Both of us were a little more relaxed now that we weren’t driving to Ohio that night. Although I was a little disappointed that our spontaneity had been extinguished, I had become even more excited at the prospect of a real wedding and despite knowing we would be going back to the headache of planning it, I was too much on a high to care.
Michael gratefully let the whole staff out early and Jim and I found ourselves still singing to pop songs and recounting the zaniness that occurred at work in the car as we drove home.
“I think Andy and Kelly were having some sort of dance off,” Jim commented.
“Yeah, that was strange,” I agreed, thinking back to the two of them trying to out do each other. “Do you think anything’s going on there?”
Jim laughed. “Yeah, could you imagine?”
“Oh and did you see Kevin with Lynn?” I cooed. “They make such an adorable couple. I’m happy for him.”
“They do,” Jim replied happily. “I think that’s one more on the list of people to invite.”
I shifted uneasily, my dress ruffling against the seat. If he had been at all disappointed about the decision not to elope, he didn’t show it but I wanted to make sure. “Hey, uh, are you sure you’re alright waiting?”
Jim let out a sigh. “If you wanted to turn around right now and go off to Ohio I’d do it. And if you wanted to wait another year, I would. I just want to be married to you.”
I blushed. “Hey, Jim…”
“Yeah?”
“I can’t wait to be your wife.”
He smiled as I placed my hand over his and gave it a squeeze.
“Oh, did you overhear Bob Vance talking to Phyllis about having her shirt stapled together?” he asked.
I shuddered. “Yeah, I don’t even want to know what happened in that conference room.”
* * *
When we returned home, the first thing I did was find a vase for the flowers. I brought out the one we had in our bedroom, which had held the carnations Jim had given me for Valentine’s day, filled it with water, placed the bouquet in and set it on the dinning room table. I took a step back to admire them and smiled when I realized it would be a symbol of the day we almost got married.
Jim came up behind me, having just taken off his jacket, tie and work shirt, leaving only his undershirt to go with the dress pants. He slipped his arms around my waist and rested his head on my shoulder. “They are lovely, aren’t they?” he said referring to the flowers.
“Yeah…” I said, turning around smiling as I wrapped my arms around his neck. I ran my fingers through his hair. “Can you believe we were seriously considering driving to Ohio to get married today?”
“Actually, I can,” he responded, his voice low. His hands ran up and down my back, eventually sliding down to rest on my hips. “And if you want to drive out tomorrow, I’m ready and willing.”
I let out a tiny giggle as our lips met. The kiss was slow and sweet as we sunk into it. My knees went weak as he rolled his tongued over mine. My heart pound in my chest as he pushed my hips closer to his own. I wrapped my arms tighter around his neck, pressing my body firmly into his, wanting more of him, wanting to feel connected in every way possible. Suddenly, the fabric clinging to my skin had become much too constraining and all I wanted was to get it off. I broke away, resting my head against his.
“Hey, Jim, do me a favor?” I panted.
“What?”
“Get me out of this dress.”
He grinned.
* * *
There I was, hours later, curled up on our bed. Jim had snuggled up behind me, his long arms wrapped around my waist, even in his sleep holding me tight. My fingers traced his left hand, stopping on the ring finger. Eventually there’d be a band around that finger, a tiny part of my heart ached for it to be there now, but it was coming soon enough.
I glanced back at the dress on the floor and was glad that we had decided to wait. Eventually that pink dress would be replaced with a white one and Jim and I would have that special day with all the cheesiness and celebration. But for now I was quite content.
I already had what I wanted more than anything. A life with Jim beside me. I snuggled into him a little more letting his warmth encompass me as I closed my eyes, finally drifting to sleep.
Story Notes:
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
Author's Chapter Notes:
Just a small, happy piece that came to me after watching Cafe Disco, which was a nice break from all the angst in my WIP. Pam's POV
Have to give a shout out to the great LuxTenebrae for the beta. Thank you again. :)
Hope you guys enjoy!
Disclaimer: All I own is my imagination.
Have to give a shout out to the great LuxTenebrae for the beta. Thank you again. :)
Hope you guys enjoy!
Disclaimer: All I own is my imagination.
iamapam1883 is the author of 7 other stories.
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