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Story Notes:
Standard disclaimer applies. I sadly don't own these characters and make nothing from my writings. 
Author's Chapter Notes:
Starting out with things in the past. 

Mist soaked the paving stones. Tourists jockeyed for position to get the perfect shot on Luna Island. The roar of water plunging over the edge seemed to drown out any other noise. Jim could feel the thunder of the falls in his chest as he leaned over the railing. In front of him the Niagara River rushed on to plunge over the crest of Bridal Veil Falls. The name made Jim scoff as another shard of ice stabbed his heart.

I wonder what her veil looks like? Would it be long and cover her face or one of those small ones that looks like a bird cage? I know she wanted a veil, but she never told me which one she went with. Would her eyes be sparkling because it’s finally her big day or would they be scared because of what happened that night? She’s been looking forward to this for years, of course her eyes would be shining. Why wouldn’t they? She’s marrying the man she loves in a few days.

Reaching into his back pocket he pulled out a white envelope. Turning his back on the falls to protect the paper from the mist in the air, he ran his thumb over her name. His mind drifted back in time. Not to when he wrote the note, but when he’d been inspired to write the note.


Jim tapped his roommate on the shoulder. “Hey Mark, did you see where Pam got herself off to?”

Mark looked up from where he was watching Dwight head bang to ‘Girls, Girls, Girls,’ by Motley Crue on the karaoke machine. “I think I saw her head upstairs.”

“Thanks man.”

Walking swiftly down the hall, Jim turned to climb the stairs. He paused for a second when he saw that his framed college diploma was hanging on the wall where the French bicycle and motorcycle poster usually hung. He shook his head and let out a deep sigh with a bemused grin on his face. Taking the diploma off the wall he climbed the rest of the stairs and rounded the corner to his room.

Pam was on his bed again. Just like before she was laying on her stomach on the bed with her feet gently swaying in the air. His yearbook was back between her arms. She was clearly enjoying herself. Jim had long cataloged all of the many smiles of Pam Beesly. By far his favorite smile was the one where she would unconsciously poke the tip of her tongue between her front teeth. This was mainly due to the fact that, to his knowledge, only he had ever caused her to smile like that.

Looking past her, he saw that indeed the French poster was now in place where his college diploma usually hung on the wall of his room. He knocked gently on the door as he came in.

“Doing a little redecorating Beesly?”

Her head shot up in surprise. When she saw what he was holding her face morphed into an impish grin.

“Shoot, I was hoping it would take you longer than that to notice the switch.”

Jim grinned back at her for a moment before adopting a more serious expression. “The scores are in. Six out of ten for originality. Lost a few points because simply switching items is one of the oldest tricks in the book but gained a few since you went for something big and an obvious target. Five out of ten for impact. This would classify as more of a minor inconvenience rather than a major disruption but considering the target of said prank it’s obvious the intent wasn’t to cause disruption, just mischief. Finally, the big one, twelve out of ten for execution. You earned a few bonus points there since it takes a deft hand to not only pull off the item switch, but to come up with the idea so quickly since I’m assuming you weren’t planning on pranking me when you showed up tonight. So, it looks like you’re at twenty-three points out of a possible thirty. Well done Miss Beesly, your scores are improving!”

Pam tilted her head back in laughter. “Helps having a good coach,” she said.

“It does,” Jim agreed proudly as he set his diploma down on his desk, “It does indeed.”

“Yep,” Pam grinned evilly at him. “I should thank Larissa for all the tips.”

Jim mimed being stabbed in the chest and sat down heavily in his chair. “Ugh! Straight for the heart. Farewell cruel world!”

Pam giggled at his antics and threw a pillow at him. “You can use that to soak up the all the blood.”

Jim easily caught the pillow and tossed it back on the bed. He craned his neck to try and see what page Pam had his yearbook open to. “Whatcha lookin’ at now?”

“I found the pictures from your senior class trip,” she said. Pam glanced down at the book before giving Jim a skeptical look. “Niagara Falls? Really? Couldn’t your class have gone somewhere more exciting?”

“Ehhh,” he shrugged. “As I recall, I wasn’t on the trip planning committee. Mark was, so direct all scorn to him. It did end up being a fun trip.”

“Why?” Pam’s eyebrows raised. “Did you guys sneak out of your hotel rooms and try to get into the casino?”

“Yes actually. It was well after curfew. Me, Mark, a few other guys met up with some of the girls in our class and tried to get in. But you have to be nineteen to gamble in Canada. The security guards wouldn’t even let us in the lobby.”

“Jim Halpert? Breaking the rules?” Pam fluttered her eyes and placed a delicate hand on her collarbone. “Perish the thought.”

“I know, right?” Jim laughed with her.

“So, what did you do instead?” she pressed.

Jim looked at the ceiling and smiled as the memory came back to him. “We walked next door where there was a new part of the casino under renovation. There was this big open area on the second floor with a bunch of construction debris all around. We found a couple pipes and decided it would be a good idea to use them to play stickball.”

Pam’s face fell forward in laughter. She was wiping her eyes when she looked up again. “Stickball? Please tell me you’re kidding!”

Jim looked very pleased with himself. “Hardly. The only thing was we didn’t have a ball. Instead we tried using clumps of dried drywall mud that had these little stones in them. They ended up exploding everywhere when we hit them so stickball turned out to be a bust.”

“You have got to be making that up!”

“Go ask Mark if you want,” Jim pointed with his thumb to the stairs. “He was there.”

“Maybe later,” Pam said and went back to looking at the pictures.

She sat up to sit on the edge of the bed and patted next to her for Jim to join her. When he had, she started asking questions about who was who in the various pictures. Jim gladly told her about his high school friends and the other adventures they’d had during the trip. Getting soaked on the Maid of the Mist, daring each other to go past the barrier in tunnel behind the falls, debating who would be the most likely to survive going over the falls in a barrel. He was more than a little surprised when Pam leaned her head over to rest on his shoulder.

“It looks and sounds like it was a good time.”

“It was,” he said softly. “Haven’t you ever been to Niagara Falls?”

“No,” she admitted. “But I’ve thought a lot about it.”

“Oh? Like when.”

She ducked her head a little, but Jim could tell she was starting to blush. “It’s silly.”

“Hey I told you about playing stickball. Your turn for something silly.”

Pam gave him a mock –glare but took a deep breath. “You probably know that every girl starts planning her wedding when she’s about eight. For a long time, I thought getting married at Niagara Falls would be kind of cool. To have my future husband pull off my veil by Bridal Veil Falls seemed really special.”

Jim covered the pang in his heart with a knowing smirk and nod of his head. “A destination wedding, sounds nice. I like it.”

“Stop it you,” Pam smirked, but still swatted his arm good-naturedly at his teasing tone for good measure. She looked back at the yearbook with a wistful look to her eye. “It was just a dream back before I’d even met Roy. I told him about it once and all I got from him was, ‘why go all the way to New York when something like my uncle’s backyard is free.’”

Jim had to swallow hard in order to keep his voice level. “So that’s where the big event will happen? Roy’s uncle’s backyard?”

“Huh!” she scoffed. “If he ever finally agrees to a date. Every time I suggest something, he blows it off saying, ‘we’ll see.’ It’s hard to plan a wedding when you don’t know when the wedding will be.” She looked up at him. “I’m sorry Jim. I didn’t mean to dump all this on you. Especially since this party has been so much fun.”

“Hey, it’s okay,” he assured her. Taking a chance, he brought his arm up and draped it over her shoulders. Gently, he started rubbing her upper arm. “We all need to vent sometimes.”

Pam didn’t reply. She just looked down at the pictures in front of her. Jim didn’t want to spoil the moment so he stayed still, save for his hand still travelling up and down her shoulder. It wasn’t often he got to be this close to her so he was determined to savor every second.

A loud crash and a loud chorus of shouts from downstairs broke the spell. Reluctantly, Jim stood up. “I should go see what that’s about.”

“I’ll go with you,” Pam said as she also got to her feet and set the yearbook down on the bed behind her. “Considering that both Michael and Dwight are now here I’m sure you could use the back-up.”

The tightness that had formed in Jim’s chest loosened somewhat and he gave her a lop-sided smirk. “What would I ever do without you Beesly?”

“Probably something dumb like go over Niagara Falls in a barrel,” she smiled back as they left his room and made their way back downstairs.


Jim was tempted to crush the envelope in his hand and toss it into the river. After all, he mused. That’s why you’re here. To let her go.

After several half-hearted attempts, Jim found he couldn’t bring himself to damage the envelope. The words inside had too much meaning to him. Words he’d written promising that if he had the chance, he’d do everything to make her dreams come true, to apricate her as she deserved, to love her as deeply as he could.

He put the envelope back in his pocket and turned one last time to face the waterfall. When he brought his hand to his face, he wasn’t sure if it was tears or spray from the falls he was wiping from his eyes.

“Good-bye Pam.”

His whisper vanished in the current to be carried over the brink and disappear into the mist. He turned back and walked up the path towards the Cave of the Winds pavilion to head to the parking lot. On the other side of the building a woman with curly honey-brown hair had just arrived and was making her way down the path Jim had just walked up.

Pam steeled herself as the roar of the river grew louder. It seemed to match the boil of emotions in her heart. It was only this morning she’d woken up in her bed next to Roy. His side of the bedroom was still as cluttered as ever. The dishes he’d promised to wash last night were still sitting in the sink. Empty beer cans were stacked on the end table next to the couch. The ensuing fight had been long and loud. Pam once more screaming at Roy for his lack of commitment to even simple household tasks. He shouted back just as loudly that she was nagging him again. They ended up across the table breathing heavily at each other. When Roy said that it was only the stress of the wedding that was making her act crazy and that after Saturday everything would be back to normal, Pam felt something break inside.

“How can things get back to normal, when this is already what normal is?” she had asked him.

When Roy couldn’t answer her, she slipped her ring off and set it on the table between them. Pam grabbed her keys and purse, walked out the door, and climbed into her car. Her heart took another hit when she looked in the rearview mirror and didn’t see Roy chasing after her.

She pulled into the parking lot of a strip mall and let the tears flow. Pam knew she should call either her Mom or Penny to let them know what had just happened. But when she dug her phone out of her purse, she couldn’t bring herself to hit the key for their speed dial numbers. Not when that little number ‘2’ was staring back at her. She’d always felt slightly guilty that Jim was the first person on her speed dial list. Now that guilt threatened to overwhelm her.

So instead of calling her family, she drove.

At first her course had her meandering around Scranton aimlessly. Since she’d taken off the week before the wedding, she wasn’t expected back at Dunder-Mifflin. Not that she wanted to go there and face the desk in front of hers that had been empty ever since Casino Night. Despite her best efforts thoughts of Jim creeped into her mind. She found herself turning onto I-81 northbound towards New York. Four hours later she was pulling into the Cave of the Winds parking lot.

The thoughts that had crashed through her mind during the drive didn’t abate as she walked towards the river. Ten years! Ten years I gave to Roy only for him to treat me like I’m his mother! What the hell Jim! How could you kiss me like that? Say what you did to me and then leave? You love me but you just disappear off the face of the earth? I mean really? Australia? How is any of this fair? Why is this happening to me? What am I doing? Driving to New York just to see some stupid waterfall. But it’s not some stupid waterfall. It’s the place that Jim said would be nice. Why would you love me Jim? I’m just the secretary. I’m not like Katy. Little Miss Perfect-and-Put-Together. Still nothing from Roy. Huh, you’d think he would have at least tried to say something. Where does he get off? ‘Just tell me where and when to be babe. Whatever you want babe. I’m sure it will all look great babe. What about hot dogs for dinner babe?’ He could have put some effort into things. Jim! Where are you? I need my best friend. I don’t care anymore! I need you Jim!

She reached the railing at the edge of the falls. Around her mist swirled and clung to her face and hair. The cold metal under her hands matched the numbness in her chest. As she wiped tears and water from her face, she whispered into the mist.

“I love you Jim. Please come back.”

Chapter End Notes:
Hope that satisfies all you angst-lovers out there. Reviews welcome as always.

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