Her clock read 8:00 am by the time she finally mustered up the courage to get out of bed.
He’s been back for a week now, each day she recognizes him less and less. This blazer wearing-water bottle drinking-Karen dating version of Jim. “Was he really gone for that long?” she asks herself on the drive to work. “Maybe this was always him, Maybe you were just holding him back”.
She knows that it shouldn’t be this hard. That it could be so much worse, he could be gone for good.
Yet, somehow this is infinitely worse. It gets harder and harder every day to watch him flirt with Karen the way he used to flirt with her.
During her lunch break she daydreams about getting fired, taking the money and just going somewhere. Leaving all the hurt and anger in the dust, finally allowing herself to have the fresh start she so desperately wants. “No more Dwight and Michael” she thinks “no more endless meetings and nicknames. No more boring conversations about paper or the party planning committee”. Yet, one thought always makes the fantasy come crashing down.
“No more Jim”
She unlocks her apartment and shrugs off her coat before finally letting herself break. A week's worth of hurt and anger washes over, heavy sobs escape her throat. “When will this end” she whispers to herself as the tears stream down her face. “When?”
She spends the night after the mall on the couch, trying not to picture his hands on her hips.
Sometimes in the dead of night, she swears she can still feel Jim’s lips on hers. How his heart was beating out of his chest and how soft his hair was between her fingers. It’s peaceful here, in the memories of who they once were. Before everything changed, before he left.
Before she changed her mind.
Before it was too late.
This is also posted on Ao3.
Author's Chapter Notes:
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Chapter End Notes:
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Debutante_gurl is the author of 2 other stories.