Talk to me, Tivo: After he has an accident while using a grill, injured Michael demands attention from the entire Dunder Mifflin office.
Jaminess: 1 [3=Casino Night]
Jam Cam: Another day, another Jammy pow wow at the receptionist’s desk…until the boss calls. Somehow Michael burned his foot on a George Foreman’s grill — something that only makes sense to Michael. Oh, Jim and Pam — and the rest of the office — are having way too much fun with this!
Dwight comes to the rescue and brings Michael in, where Jim promptly decides to start popping the bubbles that make up the packing material Michael is wearing on his injured foot. But just treat him like you would any other day. For Jim, that means asking Michael where he’s shipping his foot. For Pam, that means telling him he’s asking fussy and offering him some aspirin.
Pam is playing with the iPod knockoff Roy bought her for Christmas when Dwight comes to have a closer look. He even tells her where she can download load from a Russian Web site for cheap, then makes a light-hearted joke about all the songs being in Russian. Ha, ha! Isn’t he funny, Pan? Wait…Pan? Something is not right with that boy’s head.
While Dwight is being nicer than usual, Michael seems to have become more annoying by asking her to massage butter on his foot, which just conjures up a horrible image of cooking something of a Foreman grill with butter. But I wouldn’t recommend a foot.
Dwight is being so much nicer than usual that he actually gives Pam a new cover for her DuroSport. He dares her to throw it so she does and it lands near Jim’s feet. Jim is looking really weirded out by the fact that Pam and Dwight are friends. Pam says not to worry, Dwight’s not her friend…oh my God! He’s kind of her friend!
Jim is worried that Dwight’s being weird today, but Pam reassures him that it’s ok because he’s been really nice. And that’s not weird? Um…was Dwight abducted and replaced with a Robo-Dwight when he went to pick up Michael?
After a disasterous meeting with Billy the Properties Manager, Jim has to apologize for Michael’s crass behavior about Billy’s wheelchair. Billy asks what’s wrong with and Jim incorrectly explains it was a Foreman grill incident. No, the other guy, the one with a concussion. A wha? Things start coming together in Jim’s head.
On the other hand, Dwight’s head is falling apart, especially when he passes out on his desk. Yep, he probably has a concussion. Despite all the bad blood between them, Jim shows some care for the assistant regional manager and tells Michael they have to go to the hospital. Somehow, Jim become responsible for driving Meredith’s car and spraying Dwight in the face with water so he doesn’t pass out. After Jim takes on the concerned father role, Pam begins to mother Dwight and help him get to the elevator. She looks a little sad letting go of Dwight she actually liked, knowing he’s going to be a pain in the ass when he gets healthy again.
Jim’s driving a minivan to Chucky Cheese! Ok, it’s Meredith’s minivan and they’re really going to the hospital with Michael calling shotgun. At least Jim can get out his pent-up frustration in one of the funniest Office scenes ever as he tries to keep Dwight and Michael under control by spraying them with water while he’s at the wheel. Poor Jim. How did he end up like this?
At the hospital, Jim goes back to being the responsible one. He somehow knows Dwight’s middle name is not “Danger” but “Kurt” and he somehow knows that they’re at the hospital because of a concussion and not because they’re bringing someone to the hospital. Well, they are, but that shouldn’t go on Dwight’s admittance forms.
Dunder Mifflin, this is Jim. I’m still hanging out with Dwight at the hospital. I think he’ll be better soon, but I’m not so sure about Michael. Wait a minute! Back at the office, it looks like Angela heard Pam’s phone conversation and is concerned. Pam seems to still feel motherly and tells Oscar that Dwight will be ok in a voice loud enough for Angela to hear it. What a nice girl that Pam is.
The Others: Michael burns his foot on a George Foreman grill while trying to cook some bacon. Unfortunately, no one really cares included Ryan the Temp. At least Ryan makes a pseudo-effort to help by going to get the boss food or crushing up extra-strength aspirin and putting it in Michael’s pudding cup. Yum! Michael thinks the office needs a little sensitivity training and brings in a guy in a wheelchair who is more uncomfortable with the way Michael treats more than anyone else. Meanwhile, Dwight seems to be the person most in need of treatment after banging his head. Luckily, he has Jim to take care of him, spray him with water to keep him awake, and generally keep Michael the Attention Whore in line in the emergency room.
What have we learned today, kids: Make sure you appoint an emergency contact that will look out for your best interests in the case of an emergency. If your emergency contact thinks a foot injury is worse than a head injury, you should reconsider. If, however, your contact acts motherly and caring, it’s a good sign and you should admit to her that love her already.
– written by Jenny
Quotes
Pam: Dunder Mifflin, this is Pam.
Michael [on phone]: Pam, it’s Michael. Help me, I need help right now!
Pam: Michael, what’s wrong?
Michael: I’m hurt, I have hurt myself. Oh my God!!
Pam: Ok, wait wait wait wait!
Michael: Oh, this is not looking good, Pam!
Pam: Michael, do you need me to call you an ambulance?
Michael: No, I want you to pick me up.
Pam: Ok.
Michael: Ohh!
Pam: Wait a sec, I thought you said that you were hurt.
Michael: I am hurt. I hurt my foot.
Jim: Pam? Pam?
Michael: I want to come to work, but I need you to come pick me up.
[Jim pushes the speaker phone button]
Michael [on speaker phone]: Oh God!
Jim: Hey, whoa! Michael!
Michael: Oh God!
Jim: It’s ok. It’s Jim. Just say again, really loudly, what happened.
Michael: Ok, bahhhh! I burned my foot…very badly on my Foreman grill and I now need someone to come and bring me into work.
Jim: You burned your foot on a Foreman Grill?
Michael: Pam, could you come get me?
Pam: Uh, I have to stay here and answer the phone.
Michael: Ok, could someone come and get me, please? Ryan?
Pam: Michael, you should stay home and rest.
Michael: There’s no toliet paper here. Could Ryan — tell Ryan to bring toliet paper! Can you tell him that?
Kevin: Can you hop?
Michael: I tried hopping Kevin and I bumped my elbow against the wall, and now my elbow has a protuberence. No one wants to pick me up?
Dwight: What is going on? What is going on?
Pam: Michael is “sick” and he wants one of us to rescue him.
Michael: I’m not sick, I’m…
Dwight: I’m coming, Michael! I’m going to save you! Michael is in trouble!
Michael: Don’t! Is that Dwight? I do not want Dwight.
Dwight: Ok, hold on Michael, I am coming! Wait there!
Michael: I do not want Dwight!
Pam: Michael, why don’t you call your girlfriend?
Michael: I don’t have a girlfriend.
Jim: But you said you went out with her this weekend.
Michael: It was all made up. Just, someone come, ok? Anyone…anyone but Dwight.
[everyone hears a crash]
Jim: What was that? [runs to Michael’s window] Ooh! He hit the pole. It’s broken, right? He can’t…
Pam: Oh my gosh.
Jim: Oh Dwight, Dwight.
[Dwight vomits on window]
Jim, Pam and the others: Oh!!!! Oh my God!
Jim: He’s still driving. Dwight…you forgot your bumper!
Pam: You missed two big conference calls today, one with corporate.
Michael: Oh, did you explain why?
Pam: No, I didn’t mention that you cooked your foot.
Michael: Burned my foot, Pam.
[Jim “pops” Michael’s “cast”]
Michael: Please stop popping my cast. Thank you.
Jim: So where are you shipping your foot?
Michael: Ha ha ha. So where are you shipping…
Dwight: Your foot.
Dwight: Oh man, is that Prism Durosport?
Pam: You’ve seen one of these?
Dwight: Yea. It’s like an iPod but even better because they’re chunkier and more solid.
Pam: Roy gave it to me for Christmas. I’m trying to figure out how to put songs on it.
Dwight: No no no, don’t go there. I know this Russian Web site where you can download songs for two cents a piece.
Pam: Really?
Dwight: Yea, I’ll write down the address for you…only the only thing is is that all the songs are in Russian. Kidding!
Pam: Oh, hee hee hee!
Dwight: Why would they all be in Russian? Ok…see ya later, Pan.
Pam: Pan?
Dwight: These covers are totally indestructable.
Pam: Really?
Dwight: Yeah, throw it. I promise it won’t break. Chuck it. [Pam throws her MP3 player] Oh no, it’s broken.
Pam: What?
Dwight: No, it’s fine. I told you it wouldn’t break. You could throw it all day long.
Pam: That’s so cool. Thanks, Dwight.
Dwight: You’re welcome.
Jim: So I guess Pam and Dwight are friends now.
Pam: Oh God, no. Dwight isn’t my friend…Oh my God! Dwight’s kind of my friend.
Jim: Do you think Dwight’s being weird today?
Pam: No. He’s actually been really nice and helpful.
Jim: And that isn’t weird?
Pam: Wow.
Jim: Oh! Okay, I think we need to take him to the hospital, because I’m pretty sure he has a concussion.
Michael: Oh, now you feel some compassion for him.
Angela: He needs to go right now and you’re his emergency contact. I think you should go with him.
Michael: Why don’t you go with him?
Angela: I…barely know him.
Dwight: I want Michael to take me.
Michael: I can’t take you. I don’t have my car and yours is all vomity.
Meredith: You can take my van!
Michael: Oh, ok. No, I can’t drive. Jim, why don’t you drive?
Jim: Fine.
Michael: We’ll go. I’m still recovering. So let’s just — Ryan, can you get my coat please?
[Jim helps Dwight up]
Jim: Slowly. OK? Let’s just get to the elevator. [Dwight makes helicopter noises.] What are you doing?
Dwight: Vietnam sounds.
Jim: Stop. Stop. Stop stop stop.
[Dwight falls on couch]
Dwight: I’m tired.
Jim: You can’t lay down. Wake up!
[Jim sprays Dwight with water]
Dwight: Ahh!
Pam: Wait, here. Let me help you, Dwight. Come on. Get up.
Dwight: Thanks.
Dwight: You’re the best.
Dwight: It smells like chicken soup.
Pam: I know.
Dwight: I have to go to the hospital.
Pam: I know.
Dwight: Where are we going?
Pam: I just wanna say goodbye, ok?
Dwight: I’ll be back.
Pam: Yes, I know, but it’s gonna be different.
Dwight: Why?
Pam: It’s just hard to explain.
Dwight: Oh Pam, you’re adorable.
Pam: Oh, my goodness. Come here.
Dwight: Oh, huggy hugs.
Pam: Dunder-Mifflin, this is Pam.
Jim: Dunder-Mifflin, this is Jim.
Pam: Oh my God, what’s going on? Is Dwight okay?
Jim: Mm-hm. He should be fine, but they brought him in for a CAT scan.
Pam: I can’t believe he’s getting a CAT scan.
Jim: Michael went in there with him, too. It’s pretty sweet.
Pam: Really? Michael went in with him?
Jim: Mm-hm.
Pam: Wow.
Jim: But they shouldn’t be much longer now, so we’ll be back soon.
Pam: Okay, that’s�[Pam sees Angela looking concerned] …good news. Um…uh, yeah, no. I’ll let you go.
Jim: Ok.
Pam: Ok.
Jim: Bye.
Pam: Bye.
