10 [Report This]Date: October 12, 2008 05:01 pm Title: The Nature of Fun
This may be my favorite chapter of this so far. I love how you seamlessly incorporated the talking heads and brief interviews. I also love the individual personalities you gave each of the secondary characters. I've never reviewed every chapter of every story that I've loved but I'm going to try to change that with this. Because of this fic and the website you linked on the boards, I've been buying copies of DFW's work wherever I can find it and I can't wait to read all of it. Thank you for writing and posting this.
Author's Response:
Elly, thank you so much for this! I'm thrilled that you're enjoying this, but this is going to be very small, rotten potatoes (that smell like old tomatoes and dirt) once you start reading DFW. Have fun on that journey.
Chapter 4 is percolating in my head right now and should be bubbling over and into Word today and tomorrow. I hope you like it.
10 [Report This]Date: October 12, 2008 04:17 pm Title: The Nature of Fun
I am deeply in love with this story, Sweetpea. Truly and madly. This is just what I needed right now. I would love to give you a really detailed line-by-line review, but I'm exhausted at the moment (brother's wedding today, which has pretty much taken up the whole weekend really), so please forgive me. The abridged version is that this story knocks my socks off and makes me feel like a voyeur in the best kind of way. The alternate versions of these characters are so real. The way you describe Jim's sadness is breathtaking. Way to go, girl. I am really excited to keep reading.
Author's Response: Nan, this review is perfect and I have to remind myself of this - leaving a review doesn't have to be a whole masterpiece of War and Peace length, though sometimes it seems like I'm not going to be able to do a story justice with what I have to say about it. Sometimes all that comes to mind is "This was really great and I enjoyed reading it." Gosh, just knowing that someone enjoyed what you wrote is enough for me. I can't speak for anyone else, but anything beyond that is just so much gravy. I'm so glad you're enjoying and thank you so much for saying so. :-*
10 [Report This]Date: October 12, 2008 01:58 pm Title: The Nature of Fun
That's it-- I'm going out and buying some David Foster Wallace TODAY. Question: If I can only afford to buy one book by DFW, which book should it be?
I got so excited when I saw that you updated this. I love what you've done with Pam, how she's got this fire inside of her. I just love this whole thing so much, I want to take it by the girl's locker room and make out with it. :)
Author's Response:
Ha! This story is enough of a tramp that it'll probably tongue-kiss you under the bleachers, Corking. So cool to read this and thank you so much!
On to DFW. You can read quite a bit online to get your feet wet. The Howling Fantods is an amazing site (www.thehowlingfantods.com) - start there. Check out the link to "The Uncollected DFW" - some really wonderful and very early (like from his undergrad at Amherst) things there. They also have a bookstore. Harper's has made most of the pieces DFW wrote for them available online. Go here: http://www.harpers.org/archive/2008/09/hbc-90003557. On a more personal level, Dave Eggers' site (www.mcsweeneys.net) has memories and tributes posted. Some are quite moving and will give you an idea of who he was beyond being an incomparable writer.
A must-read - and maybe start here - is the text of his commencement address at Kenyon College in 2005. Here: http://www.marginalia.org/dfw_kenyon_commencement.html. Such a simple concept, he takes it down, down, down to the molecular level to make sure that you understand what it means to learn how to think and how that can inform every aspect of your life.
After you finish that, you can probably decide for yourself what you want to buy! Books are expensive - I often spend my lunch hour pawing through paperbacks and hardcovers at Goodwill. Good luck and bon voyage!
10 [Report This]Date: October 12, 2008 01:37 pm Title: Shipping Out
Hi, Sweetpea!
I'm a big fan of your work, especially "Allentown," but I just wanted to say how much I'm loving this story so far. Usually, a /other isn't my cup of tea, since it gives me unsettling feelings to think that Pam or Jim could actually be that in love wiht someone else (I guess that's why it's fiction), but there were so many glowing reviews on the MB that I had to check your story out. The Jim in this story is so believable as the dorky/hot guy teacher in HS that everyone had (except me). Unfortunately, my high school teachers were mostly crotchety old ladies, but once I got to college, profs like these sprung up everywhere. I'm glad I decided to read, and I can't wait to see where it's going. Please update soon!
Author's Response: Hey, Mountaineers! So nice to see you here again! You know, it's a great compliment when someone says 'normally I don't like this kind of thing, but...' so thank you very much for that! I've really loved writing this story and I think it's going to be one more chapter and a short epilogue to bring it home. I hope you keep reading and thank you so much for commenting!
10 [Report This]Date: October 12, 2008 01:02 pm Title: The Nature of Fun
Yes.
I bow down to the queen of poetic explorations into Jim Halpert. This was so amazing, and moving, and full of stuff just pouring out. I cannot wait for more, you are a master! (mastress? mistress? rain? rein? rainn? god, I'll never change...)
Author's Response:
Mattress. You can call me the archive mattress.
This has been a magical little ride for me and I'm glad you're enjoying the scenery! Thanks so much for this, Stablergirl. I hope you never do change. :-*
Date: October 12, 2008 10:13 am Title: The Nature of Fun
First, let me say that I usually don't like fics that have The Office crew in other careers. But this is amazing. Every word is just fantastic.
Second, in high school, one of my male teachers cried (over the US Constitution, not poetry) and it was just like you described it. Here was this grown man, in tears, over the Constitution. No one laughed, no one moved, no one even flinched when the bell rang. And you captured exactly how stuff like that happens.
Just awesome. I can't wait for more.
Author's Response: katie, you can't even imagine how happy I was to read this! Although I'm not sure whether to laugh or cry over someone crying over the Constitution?! Did he have a mad crush on Sandra Day O'Connor or something? Anyway, the part of this chapter that I worried over the most was the group interview with the students. Let's face it, I'm old. I do spend quite a bit of time around younger people (it's how I retain my juvenile attitude) but I really wanted to get the cadence of that conversation right. I'm so pleased you think I captured that moment accurately. Thank you so much for commenting!
Date: October 12, 2008 05:09 am Title: The Nature of Fun
This story is so painful, but so beautiful. It makes my heart ache. I love this! (and David Foster Wallace- what little bit I've read.) This is gorgeous though, I can't get enough.
Author's Response:
So nice to read this, moneybeet. This story was "in development" for so long, I really didn't think I'd ever write it. I had some terrible writer's block and after a few months I was finally able to scratch out the first two chapters, but it was feeling wrong to me. I knew the exact tone I wanted and it just wasn't working. I've devoured so much of DFW's writing in the last month and almost right away, my head cleared and I felt completely centered into the story. Tingly and strangely powerful, like Vampire!Jim!
Anyway, that's a lot to say thank you so much and I'm so glad to know you're enjoying it.
Date: October 11, 2008 11:37 pm Title: Shipping Out
Okay, first of all...I have to say that this may be the best fanfiction I have ever read. ever.
Second of all....I have to know...who did the translations of your Neruda poems? They are by-far the best I have ever encountered.
Author's Response:
First, KatieKoo, wow, that's really a wonderful compliment and thank you so much!
Second, I am screwed. </Michael> I could maybe retrace my steps to credit the translators, which is such a huge oversight on my part. I feel awful about that and I can't believe I didn't have the presence of mind to do it at the time. I can tell you that all of my sources are online and I can tell you that I spent several days researching. The interview JKras gave mentioned sonnets, specifically, so I started there and researched several poets. I got a little discouraged and even had a change of heart about doing poetry at all and started thinking (and talking to colette) about doing a novel within the story. Anyway, I finally settled on Neruda after finding Sonnet XI and Sonnet XVII and The Song of Despair. Here's where it goes fuzzy - I found these poems on several sites. Some were bilingual, some were strictly in English. I read several versions of each one until I felt comfortable with all the words and felt that I'd seen them repeated in enough places that they were commonly accepted and used. I'assume you know these poems in their original Spanish. I'd love to know more about the differences in your reactions to these poems based on the language. Anyway, I'm pleased you think I've chosen well since I simply followed my gut.
Thank you so much for commenting and I hope you stick around - one more chapter and a short epilogue will do it, I think!
10 [Report This]Date: October 11, 2008 10:11 pm Title: The Nature of Fun
Love what you're doing with this - very creative and good, good writing. Always an excellent combination.
Author's Response: So great to read this, Kestrel. The format for this chapter kind of kicked my ass (and not in the good Halpert kind of ass-kicking way) but once the thought came to me that DFW's Brief Interviews are so similar to the talking heads in TO - there was no way I could do this chapter any other way. Thanks so much for the feedback, I really appreciate it.
10 [Report This]Date: October 11, 2008 09:47 pm Title: The Nature of Fun
yay! This story is awesome - SO different :D I especially like the footnotes.
Author's Response: Woo hoo! Thanks so much, untherapy. The footnotes are a ton of fun to write, so I'm so glad you're enjoying those!
10 [Report This]Date: October 11, 2008 09:38 pm Title: The Nature of Fun
This is just....wow. I can't imagine how you do this - where it comes from. Amazing.
I love how we're getting to see this friendship develop, and getting Jim's story. In bits and pieces through the eyes of the people that know them now, and little bits from themselves. I love that there is so much we don't know, too.
I love that PAM scares JIM in this world. I love that she is the one pushing him and pulling him back into the world again, so to speak.
I don't think I can do enough justice in a review, for crying out loud. I've already read this a few times and each time I pick up on something else - some little nuance that someone says, or something in the footnotes (which. I. Love.)
I just love this. Every word.
Author's Response:
Whew! Thank you so, so much for this, kells! No beta today and this was a big chapter, so I just went with it. Then I couldn't get the darn thing to post right and it's still not formatted the way I wanted it to be, but at least it's readable.
Anyway, enough whining. I love thinking of them in this world and I'm so pleased you like the little bit of role reversal with Pam and Jim. That's something Lovefool and I talked about right in the beginning. I love thinking of Pam here - she's a free spirit, a little revolutionary in rural Vermont!
This format was tough to do, no lie. But I thought it was such a good way to reveal this world, so I'm glad you liked that, too. I'm so ready to go back to plain ole narrative after this. The footnotes are way too much fun - I swear, it's like I can turn into a different person or something once I get below that line.
Thank you for such thoughtful feedback. I really appreciate it! :-*
10 [Report This]Date: October 02, 2008 11:01 am Title: Shipping Out
I can't wait for the next chapter. You write like poetry! It's just a plus there is actual poetry, too. XD
Author's Response: So kind, inthestars, thank you so much! Next chapter coming soon, so I hope to see you then.
Date: September 30, 2008 08:55 pm Title: Fictional Futures
Talk to me,' you beg. ‘Please talk to me.'
You know you had me at hello with this story -- and I hate that overused phrase, but it's so, so true. I am SO glad that we decided for you to do this alone, btw, lol. Because it's become so much bigger than I ever imagined. This story has just opened up something in you that apparently was clawing it's way to get out!...Jeez - check you out, lady.
Author's Response:
Yes! Everyone (or those who read other reviews and responses, at least) should know that we originally talked about co-authoring this story! We even wrote a little bit, a couple scenes, but it wasn't feeling right and to be fair, we both have a bit of the control freak about us! ;-) This is one of those things that just had to find it's own time, I think. God knows, I dithered over it long enough. I spent a whole day doing research on private schools in New England and their summer reading lists and boarding schools and campus maps. UGH. Just WRITE IT, Sweetpea!
The line you quoted...in grieving someone, it is the sound of their voice that I seem to miss so much. I'm not surprised you picked that one out - we always seem to be on the same wavelength with that kind of stuff.
You better be free this weekend, because I've just promised the whole Interweb that chapter 3 is coming! Love you and thanks!
Date: September 29, 2008 06:25 am Title: Fictional Futures
Now you've done it. You've broken my brain - the part that has the critical ability to write a coherent review. Oh, his dream...and those perfectly selected Neruda lines...and even your footnotes (which, let's face it, could have seemed contrived) add an essential layer. This is too many kinds of moving and unexpected and witty and surreal and real and pure Jim, yet not....to even begin to comment upon. Possibly the best thing I've read in a while (not just here either, darling.)
Oh, farther than everything. Oh, farther than everything.
Were ever more fitting or gorgeous words written? I think not.
Author's Response:
Oh, Colette, what can I even say? You are so generous and thoughtful.
So right about the line you quoted! When I read that last line, I did that big hiccuppy intake of breath thing before you start sobbing. Oh my God, it just wrecked me. I originally had another Neruda selected for this chapter, but I was browsing around and found this one and at first I started to dismiss it because the whole thing is too long, but then I got to those lines and just lost it.
I'm SO glad you think the footnotes work! And you're absolutely right - they could have gone either way. It is an absolute blast to write those - it's totally like being able to whisper into someone's ear but not miss any of the main conversation. I'm realizing that is very much how I talk, too, with tons of tangents and sidebars and wanderings that so often I have to say "but that's another story" and cut them short. But they make the main story richer, I think.
I seem to fall under a spell when I write this story and I haven't felt like that in a long, long time. Chapter 3 is going to bring some changes - interesting and fun ones, I hope. I'm thrilled you're enjoying and thank you for this.
Date: September 28, 2008 10:27 pm Title: Shipping Out
Okay I was a little iffy about this fic because my favorite fic of all time is Learning to Live Again by italianfood, but your winning me over. The formating of this story is also awakening the former english major in me....can't wait for more
10 [Report This]Date: September 28, 2008 10:12 am Title: Fictional Futures
I love the flow of this. It's so amazing.
Author's Response: Wow, Corking. 'Flow' is a very nice word to read! I'm loving the writing of this story so much and it's great to read comments like this. Thank you!
Date: September 27, 2008 08:18 pm Title: Fictional Futures
Once again, Sweetpea, you slay me. When you are done with this fic, would you mind if I took it to Vegas and married it? In all seriousness, I've never lost a spouse/significant other, but you've made me feel Jim's pain and mourning for Sarah.Let's hope Miss Beesly can help him through this valley he seems to be in. Please update soon. :)
Author's Response: Oh, elly, this just cracked me right up! Okay, you can take it to Vegas, but I need it back by Friday cause this thing is in serious need of an update. I have some legitimate excuses, but who wants to read my whining? No one, that's who! Thank you so much for reading and reviewing and I promise chapter 3 is on the way.
Date: September 27, 2008 07:00 pm Title: Fictional Futures
Guh. The girl with curious hair.
Have I told you lately I love the footnotes?
Author's Response: Have I told you lately how much I love you? Even if I have, it doesn't hurt to say thanks again for always being such a great reader and reviewer. How serendipitous is 'girl with curious hair'? God, I wanted to weep when that line just fell off my fingers. Chapter 3 this weekend. Promise.
Date: September 27, 2008 06:56 pm Title: Fictional Futures
I love the way you're writing Jim's mourning. Just very true to life, this hanging on to what's gone and not really wanting to move on, no matter how necessary it finally becomes. Very moving, especially the dream sequences.
Author's Response:
I'm so glad you're enjoying this so far, EH! I'm in love with writing it - something happens when I sit down with it, I just can't explain. I did have chapter 3 pretty much done, but I got a little divine inspiration and I wanted to completely rewrite it. Technical problems delayed that, but I can't wait to finish it this weekend. Thanks so much for always being so supportive and encouraging!
10 [Report This]Date: September 27, 2008 06:49 pm Title: Shipping Out
sweetpea, I've been waiting for this story since you mentioned it and I have to say, it does NOT disappoint. Beautiful writing, amazing premise, poetry, FOOTNOTES! (I love the footnotes!) It's just wonderful. I've read it in a bit of a rush, but I'm going to come back and give you more details. For now -- just carry on. Great stuff.
Author's Response: I'm so pleased with the positive response to the footnotes! There is more really beautiful Neruda to come - such a master. Thanks so much for your kind words, wendolf!
9 [Report This]Date: September 27, 2008 06:03 pm Title: Fictional Futures
"From your memory you recite the words, pulling them one by one, like threaded cotton from your mouth, timing it’s rhythm to the Greek chorus of her sighs, punctuating the lines with kisses on her smooth skin."
Another unbelievably awesome chapter.
Author's Response: Gosh, I love when people quote stuff they like! Thanks so much kaystar! I was beside myself last weekend when my computer took a little break. We're all fixed up here and I'm ready to go with chapter 3 this weekend. Hope to see you then and thank you so much for the review!
9 [Report This]Date: September 27, 2008 05:39 pm Title: Shipping Out
"You remember bits of her chalk notes on complementary angles superimposed on her sweater after you’d pressed her back to the board. You remember thinking that it had been so long coming, that kiss, that you’d circled each other in a holding pattern forever, so awkward for grown-ups."
"At the end of each day, you made a desperate turn for the house, not thinking to stop for food or clean shirts at the laundry, just rushing back after holding your breath for the entire day.
Here in the house you could stand in her closet and bury your face in her dresses and sweaters. You didn’t have to pretend that you weren’t dead yourself and you could miss her and long for her as much as you almost couldn’t stand and not be ashamed when grief bowed your back. "
"You’d managed to go on living and you lived long enough to stop wishing that you just wouldn’t. "
Since I have no words to tell you how much I loved this, I decided to quote some of my most favorite parts. Then I realized that would mean I would be quoting the whole thing, so I decided to just quote my top 3.
Author's Response: Wow, kaystar. Thank you so, so much. I'll admit to loving the image of him in the closet. So heartbreaking to me and so real - when we grieve we'll do anything to get that feeling of closeness back. The timing for all this angst probably couldn't be worse, considering what's going on with the show - but that's what I get for mulling this over for months. Glad you're enjoying - more soon.
Date: September 27, 2008 03:56 pm Title: Fictional Futures
Sweetpea, your writing is so beautiful that I feel inadequately equipped to review it. Seriously. I just don't have the words. I've been transported to another place, as when I'm engrossed in an impossible-to-put-down novel. The emotion of this story really strikes a chord.
...and you turn to see a girl with curious hair. LOVE it : )
I'm here for the long hall, doll ; ) Patiently awaiting more...
Author's Response: I'm so glad you're so patient, Nan! Real life and technical problems got in the way this week, but I'll be seeing you this weekend. Thanks so much for your encouragement and sweet comments. :-*
9 [Report This]Date: September 27, 2008 02:51 pm Title: Fictional Futures
This is really brilliant writing! I've never read any David Foster Wallace, but now you've got me wanting to, which I bet was part of the point of this story :) Can't wait for more.
Author's Response: untherapy, you've uncovered my evil plan! It wasn't part of the original plan of this story, because I gestate stories for a long time before I start writing and posting, but I really became enamored of the all the intersecting points that writing this could make by making DFW a kind of character here. Dive in to DFW, for sure, and prepare to have your mind blown. Thank you so much for reading and for leaving a review!
10 [Report This]Date: September 23, 2008 12:12 pm Title: Shipping Out
OMG, so beautiful and sad! I'm crying!
Looking forward to more.
Author's Response: Cheer up, PN! Chapter 2 was just posted! Thank you so much for reading and for the review!