10 [Report This]Date: May 05, 2009 04:12 pm Title: Mortal Enemy: Jim/Karen, Pam
This is my new favorite chapter! (I have a feeling I will be saying that a lot though with each knew segment you post!) This whole thing is so well done and the poems fit so perfectly, this was a really great idea and you've written it very well!
Author's Response: Thank you! I'm glad you liked it. This was definitely the poem I was looking forward to most, so I'm happy it's going over well. :)
Date: May 05, 2009 03:57 pm Title: Mortal Enemy: Jim/Karen, Pam
Oh carbondalien, I love all of these but you've really outdone yourself on this one. Perfect body language and I'm going to pick out the same line Nan did, because it's beyond awesome:
She doesn’t know if she’s ever seen two people be so connected to each other while trying to remain so far apart That describes season 3 Jam about as well as any one sentence I've ever read. Brava.
Author's Response: Thank you very much. :) This one has been in my head for a while, so I had plenty of time to think about details and such. I'm glad it all came through.
10 [Report This]Date: May 05, 2009 02:20 pm Title: Mortal Enemy: Jim/Karen, Pam
Oooo, the angst! Great one, carbondalien. The poem is perfectly suited for the scenario you've set.
She doesn’t know if she’s ever seen two people be so connected to each other while trying to remain so far apart. Youch. Good one.
Author's Response: Thank you. I've had this poem in my back pocket for a while now, so I'm happy I finally got to use it. Glad you liked it. :)
8 [Report This]Date: May 02, 2009 04:09 pm Title: Ballade at Thirty-five: Pam
"She fumbles through the conversation like a drunk through a sobriety test."
What a great line. This was lovely in its angst-ness, and I liked the callback to Pam twisting her ring in the parking lot last night.
PS Sorry to hear about your computer and losing your flash drive.
Author's Response: Thank you. :) The sobriety test line was a last minute addition, but I have to say I think it's my favorite. I'm glad you liked it.
10 [Report This]Date: May 01, 2009 11:12 pm Title: Ballade at Thirty-five: Pam
I was excited to see this continued. I sent you an email awhile ago about these stories, but I finally created an account to review. I LOVE Dottie, so bringing her poems into the Office leaves me satisfied and smiling. This one is great- sad, but great.
I have to say my favorite is "Unfortunate Coincidence, Second Love, and But Not Forgoten" because I love those poems.
Some really short ones that I love are Prophetic Soul (Dwight or Andy/Erin), Godspeed (Michael/Holly after he found out about AJ), For Unknown Lady or The Lady's Reward (Don't know who for, just really love these), Men (this one kind of reminds me of Jim/Karen, only Karen being the 'Men'), Experience (this one could be Jim/Pam- for he was all three men at one time or another,) Cheating the Fiddler or On Being a Woman (for Ryan/Kelly, Ryan being the 'Woman'), Distance... Maybe you could work one or two in
*Wishful thinking*
Keep it up! Can not wait for more!!
Author's Response: Thank you! I'm glad there's a fellow Dorothy fan out there who's enjoying this. I was toying with "Distance," "Godspeed" and "Experience" before the whole flash drive/computer fiasco, so those are probably going to crop up at some point (probably soon, as they're the ones who offer me most inspiration at the moment). I've also been thinking about "Frustration" for the way Michael feels about Toby haha. Or "Lullaby" from Karen to Pam, especially the last two lines. Definitely "Mortal Enemy" from Karen to Pam. Gah! So many good choices. Gotta love Dottie!
Anywho, thanks for reviewing. :)
Date: May 01, 2009 07:23 am Title: Ballade at Thirty-five: Pam
Woot! I'm so glad to see you back writing but very sorry to hear about the computer woes. That sucks. Anyway, I enjoyed this one, as always.
Author's Response: I'm glad you liked it. :) Hopefully writing this will get me back on track!
Date: May 01, 2009 07:17 am Title: Ballade at Thirty-five: Pam
Really enjoyed this, carbondalien. So glad you're back. Sorry to hear about your technical woes :( Loved this: In the mornings, she leaves the dreams on the pillow and goes into work. And it looks like he’s maybe having similar dreams at night, but they never talk about it. Great take on Casino Night.
Author's Response: I'm glad you liked it. :) And it's good to be back! These technological woes have made me feel like somebody's punching me in the grief bone. Stupid technology! *shakes fist angrily at the stupid computer*
Date: May 01, 2009 05:32 am Title: Ballade at Thirty-five: Pam
I've been wondering where you were and hoping you'd update this story. So, to hear this ... Arrgh!!! I can't believe you lost everything you've written! I am so, so sorry to hear that. Obviously, you can recover everything you've posted here. Did you have a lot of other work too?
Good luck recovering the memories and moving on with the things you had planned. As always, I enjoyed this chapter. I like how aware you've made Pam that she has fallen in love with Jim. I like the pacing of the language, like:
They pretend that things like wedding dates and plane tickets don’t exist. It’s awkward and uncomfortable and she hates it and she thinks she loves him and she can’t help it and she doesn’t know what to do.
It kind of rushes along like a freight train that she can't stop.
Once again, good luck!
Author's Response: I had a bunch of stories on the flash drive. Obviously I still have the ideas but some of them were agonizing to get down on "paper" so I was writing snippets here and there. And in some cases, I lost stories that were up to chapter eight and beyond. Those ones are the most frustrating because they were hard to get started (not to mention one that required research) and I was happy with where they were going. It just sucks, pretty much. I'm graduating college in a few weeks and I've been packing up, so I'm hopinghopinghoping that maybe the flash drive was just packed somewhere it shouldn't have been. But as of right now I'm assuming the worst and starting from scratch. Bleh.
Anyway! I'm happy you liked this one and the rushed along effect of Pam's thought process. I was trying to do that purposely, so I'm glad it came across the right way.
10 [Report This]Date: January 11, 2009 08:56 pm Title: After Spanish Proverb: Jim
yeah, I almost cried when he threw away the yogurt lid. I guess I'm sad that way.
10 [Report This]Date: January 11, 2009 08:49 pm Title: Second Love: Pam/Roy
(She thinks that would be the only electric company she would really need.)
As Kevin would say, Nice.
Reading on!
10 [Report This]Date: January 11, 2009 08:43 pm Title: Unfortunate Coincidence: Jim/Karen
I love your writing, and I always have, so I'm so excited you're posting this. I LOVE the poem at the beginning. :D This is so real! Reading on!
10 [Report This]Date: January 10, 2009 05:21 am Title: Little Words: Angela
Definitely one of your best, carbondalien, which is saying something since I've enjoyed them all so much.
The other man. That’s what she’s made him now. Whew--that's good!
And this: Just because they both wore engagement rings doesn’t mean they speak the same language. Yup--right you are, Ms. Martin. I would love for her to go to Pam, though. I would love to see that!
Author's Response: Thank you very much. :)
I actually wrote something where Angela did go to Pam, but I wasn't really happy with the way it turned out so I scrapped it. I've been trying to figure out how to re-do it, so maybe the talented Ms. Parker will help me out a bit. ;)
Date: January 09, 2009 02:35 pm Title: Little Words: Angela
Oh, this poem is perfect for Angela. I love how she knows about the crease in his wallet from the ring.
Author's Response: As soon as I saw the title, it popped in my head like "Little Words? Mad Libs!" Things kind of snowballed from there.
Date: January 07, 2009 08:06 am Title: Faute De Mieux: Toby
Great idea to have Toby be the star of this chap, carbondalien.
This, to me, perfectly summarizes Toby: Toby isn’t the “think big” type and he knows it. He sketches rough outlines of chapters and does character profiles and is kind of disgusted that the hero of his novel behaves more like Jim than himself (except for the always familiar insecurity and social anxiety). He can’t even be the hero of his own imagination. So sad--yet funny (I guess that makes me mean). A thoroughly enjoyable read, as always.
Author's Response: Thank you. I'm glad you liked it. :) It seems odd that it would take this many chapters for angsty poetry to bring about thoughts of Toby of all people, but there ya go I guess.
Date: January 07, 2009 06:30 am Title: Unfortunate Coincidence: Jim/Karen
I was so excited when I saw a new Dorothy Parker here this morning, and you did not disappoint. Funny, I picked out the same line as VB:
He can’t even be the hero of his own imagination.
Perfect poem for Toby, well done.
Author's Response: Thank you. I'm glad you liked it. :) When I first read the poem, I briefly thought about Pam, but she isn't just filling her time with art, etc. - it's genuinely bringing fulfillment and joy into her life, whereas Toby probably uses activities like these to just kill time, which defeats the purpose (enrichment) of these types of things.
Date: January 06, 2009 08:13 pm Title: Faute De Mieux: Toby
I just love all the vignettes you create from these snippets of poetry. I think you captured Toby's particular angst very well here. I really love the line:
He can’t even be the hero of his own imagination.
That seems sadly true to me.
Author's Response: I haven't written Toby in a while (mostly because I found it hard when he took his turn as Creepster McGee), so I thought I'd give it a shot again. I'm glad you liked it. Something about Toby just makes me think he can't even be his own hero... but who is he waiting for to save him? Oh, Toby.
Date: January 02, 2009 08:31 am Title: Autumn Valentine: Jim/Pam
The clown painting that would not die is one of my favorite things in the new season, so I'm all over this.
Here's to a never heartbroken again Jam.
Author's Response: The clown painting was a stroke of brilliance and I have to say bravo to the writers for it. Thanks for reading/reviewing. :)
Date: January 01, 2009 07:34 am Title: Autumn Valentine: Jim/Pam
Happy New Year, carbondalien! Such a treat to have two updates.
She can put it in the mental shoebox in the closet of her mind along with all those nights she slept alone and that time she broke their hearts. I like that phrasing...and I'm really happy that's a distant memory ; )
Author's Response: Happy New Year! :) I'm glad you liked these. I went on a bit of a writing spree recently.
10 [Report This]Date: December 28, 2008 05:27 am Title: Ballade Of A Talked-Off Ear: Kelly/Ryan
You capture Kelly's voice so well, carbondalien. What a fine update! This stood out in particular for me: She figures most of the sex stories are lies because she knows him and knows that he has, like, totally no game, but she can believe the making out stories because sometimes every girl makes a two-martini-mistake. Ouch!
Author's Response: Thank you. :) I love writing Kelly. She's just fun. (Even bitter Kelly is fun!)
Date: December 21, 2008 05:50 pm Title: Anecdote: Pam
Just wanted to let you know that you're doing a great job matching up these poems to some really moving and well written little chapters. I'm enjoying them thoroughly.
Author's Response: Thank you very much. I'm glad you're liking them. :)
9 [Report This]Date: December 20, 2008 10:30 pm Title: Anecdote: Pam
I really enjoy these stories! Thanks for updating. It is always a treat to see another chapter pop up.
Author's Response: Thank you. I'm glad you liked it. :)
Date: December 20, 2008 08:19 pm Title: Anecdote: Pam
Thank you, Dorothy Parker, for inspiring our friend, carbondalien. Yet another fine update. I'm a big Princess Bride fan, so I can really appreciate the referencess. KILLER last line!
Author's Response: I knew I had to combine the two. They're both just too good! So I'm glad you liked the combo (and the story). :)
Date: December 20, 2008 07:12 pm Title: Anecdote: Pam
Wonderful job.
This line was especially great, because this really was the turning point for Pam. There was no going back from what she did at Beach Games.
The Pam Beesly that exists on this side of the coal walk is not the same Pam Beesly that will exist on the other side of it.
Author's Response: I'm glad you liked it. I've been trying to get something with Pam on Beach Games written for this, so I'm happy this one is going over well. :)
10 [Report This]Date: December 20, 2008 05:29 am Title: Anecdote: Pam
This chapter is a perfect illustration of why I relate to Pam so much. Just so lovely and beautiful and touching and sigh, so good.
Author's Response: Glad you liked it. :) I relate to Pam a lot but sometimes I find it difficult to "get into her head." I'm glad this one worked.
Date: December 15, 2008 01:41 pm Title: Bric-a-Brac: Jim/Pam
goodness, I love this:
"He isn't a toy.
He is a real boy (who just wants to be her man)."
I'm soooo copying//pasting into my away messages (:
loved this chapter, btw.
Author's Response: Thanks for reviewing. Glad you liked it. :)