Date: May 02, 2020 03:37 pm Title: There's Nothing I'm Planning to Take
Holy crap that was a chapter. Huge range of emotions. Toby is so far gone. I'm angry, disgusted, and feel slightly sorry for him. Considering the beatings his life took Before, I kinda get why he'd get this hard and cruel. But still to abandon even his daughter? Wow, this new world really does hit home hard.
And to end the chapter like that? Hoo boy, kinda glad you didn't leave us on to big a cliffhanger. Still I'm feeling very nerouvs to start in on that next chapter you've written.
Amazing writing.
Author's Response: Thank you Warrior! Yeah, I feel for Toby a bit too. Life has done him no favors, that's for sure. In my mind, he left Sasha for her own good. Where he thinks he is going, he can't take her. At least that's how I feel his character is rationalizing it.
Date: May 02, 2020 01:03 am Title: Kiss my Mouth, Hell is Here
I mean, so good. Long chapter and I absolutely loved it. The detail was great and the quality of the writing is really incredible. I love seeing updates. The Toby element here continues to be a really interesting development, what caused him to become more obsessive and if his comment about what Pam would do if Jim left her and the kids is interesting. And a little foreboding? Anyhow, love it and can't wait for more as always.
Author's Response: Thank you so much for your kind words, Bayjb!
1 [Report This]Date: April 28, 2020 09:27 pm Title: Kiss my Mouth, Hell is Here
I have to say, you are an AMAZING storyteller! I’m telling you, every word of every chapter just totally keeps me hanging on. When I’m done with a chapter I want to hungrily and greedily demand more right now! I’m pretty sure I started reading this somewhere else before you brought it here, we’ll either that or I’ve become psychic because I swear when I started reading the first chapter here I knew what the next several were going to bring. Anyhow...
This is just so good. First off, if you aren’t writing professionally, you should think about it IMO. You just have a way of setting it all up where I feel like there’s a movie playing in my head of the scenes you have set. The way you keep everyone so completely in character in this drastically different setting is just masterful. Even your original characters, Brian, Dr. Brooks even Larissa who is somewhat canon but never defined in any way on the show, I feel like I somewhat know them. As if they were part of my favorite show when I watched it. You just make us know and care about these characters. Even ones like Erin, who I wasn’t a big fan of and Pete who I didn’t really care either way about, though they (especially Erin. Oh and I’m so glad it’s Erin and Pete rather than Andy but I won’t get started on that) aren’t in this much, you’ve still brought me around to care for them and to care and have concern for the impending birth of their first child. On another note, wow the surprise entrance of Toby and Sasha. Sasha being with her dad made me feel... something for him. It didn’t take long before I started feeling like I did about the Toby on the show. That man is underhanded and I’m concerned about what he might try. The question he asked Pam in this last chapter about what if Jim left her and the kids leaves me especially concerned for what Toby is thinking. I was also concerned about him insisting on going along to Tent City but I’m guessing that since he has decided that Jim doesn’t protect Pam adequately because of the bruised face (and he doesn’t want to bother with the real story. Him saying he would have stopped them or whatever, not a chance. Heck, Jim was being held by multiple people, people that had guns, yet as soon as someone was hurting Pam he used practically superhuman strength to get away from them, get to Pam and beat the heck out of the guy that hurt her. Then he had to face down more guys, who also had guns, and get them out of there and back home, sure Toby, you spineless, conniving drivel of a person... you could have done better. Not in a million years. Had it been Toby a lot worse would have happened to Pam. But, I think I got away from myself there, sorry. 😏) If Toby knew anything from working with Jim and Pam it should be that Pam is Jim’s world, well Pam and the kids now. Jim will do whatever it takes to protect them. Anyhow, this Toby, I’m interested to see how far he’s going to take his delusions. You have me nervous about him. I mean, that whole thing with he and Pam in the last chapter where he’s insisting that Jim doesn’t deserve her....Ugh. I’m thinking Jim should have brought Sasha to the house and maybe shot Toby on sight. Not really. It’s just sad how Toby is because Jim and Pam were so happy to see him.
Anyhow... the special thing about this story is that there are so many little stories that I want to know more about. Like Pete and Erin and their baby. Larissa and Dr Brooks. Where the heck did Mac and his men go and what are they going to do when they get back? I’d love to see something more developed for Angela and hear more about Dwight’s death and maybe some of him while he was still Alive . Like how did some of these people like Pete and Erin, Meredith etc... end up at the farm? What was Dwight (and Angela’s reaction when Jim and Pam and family showed up. I swear, I think you could write 100 chapters of this and I’ll probably be craving 100 more. So thank you for sharing your talent with us. I cannot wait to read more. I hope it won’t be too long in coming...🙂😉 Really, really great job.
Author's Response:
Wow. Just, wow. Your review absolutely made my day! It brings me so much joy that you are as invested in this story and these characters as I am. You aren't mistaken, I did have a few chapters up on AO3 for a short time, but I wanted to make a few changes and decided to take it down while I did. :) (It's back there now)
I adore that you are so invested in the original characters because they are near and dear to me, especially Brian. For me, Brian is the guy friend we never got to see Jim have and I have enjoyed developing him and what I have in store for him as well. And don't worry, you will see more about Dr. Brooks and Larissa, I have quite a bit more already written about them. I'm glad that you feel the same way about Toby as I do! I always found him a bit creepy and when I was forming this story in my mind I felt he would be a good fit for this role. I'm glad you noticed the slight empathy I wanted the reader to feel for him. It makes the decisions he makes down the road understandable albeit still reprehensible, in my mind. I have always felt the scariest characters are the ones that are multidimensional. They might do terrible things and you hate them but their humanity peeks through for just a brief moment. Usually right before they do something even more horrendous, but I feel that makes them more interesting.
I'm a huge sucker for protective Jim, as you can see. There were always little hints of it in the show, but he kept in reined in, so to speak. In this universe he doesn't have to, nor do we want him to, to be honest. It's one of the reasons he is so good at keeping his family alive. I think you will enjoy the next chapter. ;)
I think many of your questions about the secondary stories will get answered in the upcoming chapters. I've tried to drop little breadcrumbs along the way that will make sense once certain scenes unfold and tie things together. At least that is my hope! Thank you so much for taking the time to share your thoughts with me! I can't wait to hear more!
1 [Report This]Date: April 28, 2020 12:20 pm Title: Kiss my Mouth, Hell is Here
Toby is really starting to worry me. Glad they got out of town just fine but boy is he sketchy at all get out. Hopefully his daughter's best interests prevail and he doesn't do anything untoward.
Author's Response: Yes, Toby has a big question mark over him for everyone. He is definitely not predictable right now! Thanks so much for reading and reviewing!
Date: April 28, 2020 03:28 am Title: Kiss my Mouth, Hell is Here
Jeff is full of words of wisdom. I hope Jim is able to heed them, at least to some degree.
Larissa’s spunk with Jim is wonderful. I love the sibling dynamic you’ve created for them - very in line with all the other fic out there (that seems to be the generally accepted headcanon).
Pam and Jim leaving their children makes me all kinds of nervous. That said, them sticking together is a bit of a balm to it all. They’re stronger together. That seems to be a key theme here.
Toby coming along seems ominous at best now...
Jim and Brian’s friendship is so lovely - and that’s a sentence I never thought I’d write.
“He’s probably got a girl he likes there or something.” I love Jim’s reaction to this. He’s not silly. Even if Toby hadn’t shown his hand a little last chapter, I don’t think Jim was always blind to it.
“Worry gnawed at the back of her mind at his deep hatred of Jim” Same, Pam, dame.
The chapter both begins and ends with sage advice to Jim from his friends. Hmm... I fear there is trouble to come...
Once again, I’m super glad about that note earlier on where you stated that neither Pam nor Jim would be the character death listed in the warnings...
As always, your writing is wonderful. I love getting sucked into this eerie world you’ve created.
Author's Response:
I always love hearing your thoughts, Jenna! I really love Larissa and Jim's relationship. I wish we had seen more of it on the show but at least we have our fics to fill in that gap. :) I'm glad that you picked up on Jim and Pam being together as important--things tend to not go well when they are apart.
I wrote Brian to be the guy friend we never got to see Jim have and in this universe, I think it's particularly important to have a guy that has your back, and they are that for each other. I have come to adore Brian as I written this story. That's probably strange but *shrugs* lol
Oh, Toby... You are right, Jim is not naive to Toby's affections for her. There are a couple of deleted scenes from the show that point to that, and I tried to mention it here as well. It will come into play later for sure. Thank you so much for your review!
Date: April 27, 2020 08:58 pm Title: Kiss my Mouth, Hell is Here
Your imagery just stuns me more and more with each chapter. I was IN Tent City (not that it's a place I'd ever want to be, but you get the point). You just put so much thought and intricate detail into this world. I love it. Which is weird given the circumstances. Also please don't kill Brian. I heart him.
Author's Response: Thank you so much! Your words mean more than you know. I'm glad the mood, tone and imagery is coming across well. I've always loved fics that have totally sucked me in and left me thinking. At the risk of spoiling something, I big puffy heart Brian. That's all I will say. ;)
Date: April 27, 2020 04:11 pm Title: Kiss my Mouth, Hell is Here
Lots of tense moments with this one. I was expecting things to go south at any point. The fact that this time things didn't still leaves an ominous feeling to this story. Which is I'm sure the point.
That being said I'm glad they were able to get in and out unscathed. Toby is still a worry. Especially with his attitude to Pam.
Glad they were able to rescue not only the kids, but Isabel as well. Jim and Pam have always been kind souls and I'm glad that hasn't changed to much in this world.
Author's Response:
Thanks Warrior! Yes, Tent City is a way to have glimpse at how bad things are elsewhere. We don't get to see the true scope of the devastation because we are limited to what the characters know of course, but this is a way to expand the landscape a bit. At least that was my hope! I really wanted Jim and Pam, particularly Pam, to wrestle a bit with the goodness of her nature verses surviving, especially since now her basic needs are met. It's an easy question to answer when your are barely making it, but now they are quite well off. She will continue to, as you will see, but I wanted them to have a 'win' this time. :) Thank you so much for your reviews on every chapter!
1 [Report This]Date: April 27, 2020 03:21 pm Title: Kiss my Mouth, Hell is Here
So excited to see this new update! Loved every word.
Author's Response: Thank you! I’m thrilled you are enjoying it.
1 [Report This]Date: April 26, 2020 01:22 pm Title: In the Breath Between the Markers
I've loved reading this. I really hope you continue to update.
Author's Response: Thank you so much! I just posted a new chapter. Thanks for reading!
Date: April 22, 2020 02:41 am Title: In the Breath Between the Markers
Very excellent breather chapter. Nice to see the light moment of the wedding and bringing Tony and Sasha in to the fold. His evolution is really interesting, especially with his outburst and anger. As always, love the tender JAM moments.
Author's Response: Yes, Toby has definitely evolved and it will play a big part in his decisions. Thanks for reading and reviewing!
1 [Report This]Date: April 16, 2020 01:11 pm Title: In the Breath Between the Markers
Your writing of this story is so good. I get so invested in these characters that I put off reading this story because it stresses me out. Keep up the good work.
Wild speculation time: Toby is a plant sent by mac to infiltrate and gather information on the farm.
Author's Response: Thank you! I hate to hear it stresses you out but I am glad you are enjoying it, nonetheless. :)
Date: April 13, 2020 08:24 pm Title: In the Breath Between the Markers
“This is a breather chapter.”
*has me scared of Toby*
OOF. Lol.
I love me some protective Jim though. I have this bad feeling like bad weather is going to bring bad things for this little fortress. Ugh. This is so good.
Author's Response:
Haha yes, I do not treat poor Toby kindly. Lol.
Thanks as always, Ag. :)
Date: April 13, 2020 08:12 pm Title: In the Breath Between the Markers
Yes a breather, but at the same time with Toby reappearing like that especially with this new attitude of his, it's yet another reason to worry. I can easily see how this new world would make anyone's views change. Nice update.
Author's Response: I do not treat poor Toby kindly, I'm afraid. Thanks warrior!
Date: April 13, 2020 02:58 pm Title: In the Breath Between the Markers
Wow. That is a beautiful description of community, with the thread binding them together. Just, yes.
I found it interesting that they would trust outsiders/the small groups, given the threat of the other more dangerous group looming over them. I feel like it would be more difficult to trust people’s intention knowing that other have such nefarious ones.
Oh, that conversation between Angela and Pam is heart wrenching. Poor Angela, feeling like she can’t be the “first lady” of sorts because Jim is now filling that leader role.
Also, poor Angela because she 100% knew about that bunker and there goes *her* back up plan. I mean, it’s a little selfish to hoard supplies, but I get Dwight putting his own family first.
In an odd way, it’s kind of sweet that Toby was so defensive of Pam. That takes some guts to stick it to Jim - who is clearly a big deal in this world - like that.
Good for Toby to get some confidence. He’s barking up the wrong tree, but like, good for him I guess...
Although, the best part of it all is the way Pam and Jim have each other’s backs in absolutely everything.
Another really wonderful update.
Author's Response:
Thank you! I LOVE your detailed response! It's interesting that you noticed that blind spot about these new people. If you note that Pam was the one who encouraged it and it may not turn out as she hoped. I want to show how easy it is to fall back into 'old' thinking - these are needy people (families with children, specifically) and of course we need to help them. It is a part of Pam's personality that may be hard to reconcile in the new world.
I love that you appreciated the Angela parts. She has always been consumed by status and stature that I thought it would likely really, really bother her that Pam was the 'first lady' so to speak. And she absolutely knew about the bomb shelter.
Toby has found his voice for sure, for better or worse. ;) Thanks Jenna!
1 [Report This]Date: April 13, 2020 06:39 am Title: In the Breath Between the Markers
I'm glad Toby found his voice and I'm very interested to see how this plays out moving forward. As always, the way you portray Jim as a protector is so sweet. Pam and him work very well together in this new dynamic. Loving this story!
Author's Response: Thank you so much Beth! Toby has definitely found his voice, for better or for worse. ;) Thanks for reading!
Date: April 11, 2020 04:28 am Title: If Pain Must Come, May it Come Quickly
The font size looks good to me. I have issues with the formatting all the time, so I have no clue how to get it right the first time...
This story is just so good & I feel like I don’t have coherent enough words to put together this review. It’s SO good. The way you build tone and mood and tension. I just get sucked so deeply into the story that when I come up for air it’s hard to put into words how wonderful it is. Please update soon!
Author's Response:
Haha yes, I *think* I have maybe figured out what I have to do for the formatting. We'll see if it works next chapter. ;)
Thank you! Your review is thoughtful and wonderful and I appreciate it so much.
Date: April 10, 2020 03:44 pm Title: If Pain Must Come, May it Come Quickly
Good way to ease off after all the tension of the last chapter. Nice that they had the time to decompress a bit. Not that they're under any less strain, but this chapter feels like a chance to catch their breath.
Speaking as a medical professional, I don't see much wrong with any of the medical stuff here. Yes Pam passed out, but other than that I didn't see any symptoms of a concussion. Those would be, among other things, confusion, asking the same question over and over, and nausea and vomiting. However Jim's also not a medical guy so it stands to reason he might think that's what happened. Same goes for all the rest. Bumps, scrapes, a few cuts, but nothing a decent first aid kit can't handle.
I also like how Jim and Pam can communicate here. Both verbally and non-verbally. The scars from pain in the past may still be there, but those old hurts seem to have healed. Especially in light of their current situation.
Great writing as always.
Author's Response: Nice! Thank you for that information! I was hoping it made some sort of sense so I'm glad it works. :)
1 [Report This]Date: April 10, 2020 12:14 pm Title: This is Home Now
Yay! You fixed it! Or someone fixed it! Thank you! :)
Author's Response: Yay! I might have figured it out. *fingers crossed*
Date: April 10, 2020 09:18 am Title: If Pain Must Come, May it Come Quickly
Love, love, LOVE this, but is there any way to make the font bigger?
Author's Response: Thank you! I have NO IDEA why the font does that. It drives me nuts! No matter how I copy and paste it, it looks like that. Is there some secret recipe that makes it normal? Help!
Date: March 24, 2020 04:14 am Title: Monsters are Like Nightmares, You Just Have to Wake Up to Survive
I'm definitely still reading it (and getting spoiled by all of the new fics). Love the story and when i see updates! Great chapter.
Author's Response: Thank you so much for reading!
Date: March 24, 2020 02:06 am Title: Monsters are Like Nightmares, You Just Have to Wake Up to Survive
You’re not sure if anyone is still interested in this story?! Not to be too dramatic, but I literally can’t stop thinking about this story! It’s SO good. Your storytelling is amazing. I can feel every emotion. Oh god, and this update... Jim finding strength he didn’t know he had because Pam was in danger. My whole damn heart. Please don’t stop sharing your stories with us.
Author's Response: Thank you Jenna! I'm absolutely thrilled there are people enjoying it.
Date: March 23, 2020 10:26 pm Title: Monsters are Like Nightmares, You Just Have to Wake Up to Survive
This story continues to keep me on edge. It’s like watching The Walking Dead when it first came out. I know to expect the death and that characters I love will suffer, but it’s SO. GOOD. Ugh. I’m terrified to see what Mac does next. But honestly—Jim getting mega-strength after Pam was taken? Nice touch.
Author's Response: Yes! I am sucker for Protective!Jim, if that wasn't already clear and love to see that part of his character come out. Thank you!
1 [Report This]Date: March 23, 2020 09:18 pm Title: Monsters are Like Nightmares, You Just Have to Wake Up to Survive
This made my heart rate go crazy! Such tension and you wrote it so well! I’m definitely still interested in this story. You have a believable bad guy and have put them all in this situation in a way that stays true to the characters they are while exploring some depth that we ofc don’t see in the show. Keep writing, please! I love it!
Author's Response: Thank you very much! I'm thrilled to hear it is being enjoyed.
Date: March 23, 2020 04:03 pm Title: Monsters are Like Nightmares, You Just Have to Wake Up to Survive
Got me going there for a moment. I'm actually kinda surprised Mac let them go. I wonder what's going on with him. Like I said earlier, he seems to be a smart villain rather than just some thug. Which of course makes him that much more of a threat.
You portrayed Jim's fear, anger, and rage really well here. I'd probably do much the same if someone threatened my wife or children like that. Very real emotions.
So clearly yes there are still people following this story. Glad to see you still updating it.
Author's Response: Thank you! This was tricky to write so I appreciate hearing it came across well. There is definitely more to Mac.
1 [Report This]Date: March 23, 2020 01:12 pm Title: Monsters are Like Nightmares, You Just Have to Wake Up to Survive
I feel like I'm holding my breath each time I read an update. This is so wonderfully written and so interesting to read. You're doing a great job and I appreciate the effort you're going to in this story. Easily a favorite of mine!
Author's Response: Thank you so much! I really appreciate hearing this!