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Hoooooly heck. I stayed up until 1am on a work night to finish reading this, it was that good. I never thought that I’d be into reading about Jim and Pam with other people, but you’ve written this just perfectly that it is so believable, and very fitting for their relationship. Your characterisation of everyone is spot on, even down to the description of mannerisms and Danny’s crinkly eyes. The smut...perfection, absolute perfection. I’ve always had a soft spot for men kissing (blame it on my early foray into bandom fanfiction), but the way you wrote Jim in his interactions with Danny (and the kiss...guh) was so believable and such an erotic mental image to enjoy.
 “...and then one of his hands was on the back of her head and the other was wrapped around where she was wrapped around him, stroking, and then Danny’s hand was on her head, too, against Jim’s...” That? FIRE. The bonus Karen chapter, well. Hoo-wee. Everybody likes a bit of girl on girl, don’t they. Throw Jim into the mix and you’ve got yourself a winner. I loved the way you wrote Pam’s hesitancy and confidence, and your pace of storytelling is enviable. And this? “She started to pull away so she could look at him, but his big hand settled at the back of her head and held her still”? Maybe firm hands on Pam’s head is a kink for me, but damn, that’s hot. 
Again, such a well-written, believable, HOT fic. In fact, I think I’ll pop back and read it again. Definitely saved to my favourites.

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Mean.

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Well, now this is featured and I realize I didn't quite have the nerve to review it when it first posted. So. Like Dante and Virgil, here I begin my journey into The Inferno.

Lol. I love the casual mixture of sexual confidence and parenting interruptions here. Feels VERY Jim and Pam.

You're doing fun work playing with Jim and Pam's past insecurities about Danny, and also the phrase aural sex. I also appreciate that Danny's approach mentioned a threeway and Pam's first reaction was to poke at him about rejecting her like two decades before this... and Pam's clearly foreshadowed attraction to Karen... and also that Danny actually intended this to be a real business meeting, poor naive soul.

And finally: I will give you 32 jelly beans in the event you write a new story about Jim, Pam and Cathy entitled "Fries With That Shake," because you definitely hinted at that here.

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Okay, but like I knew this line was coming & it still got me with how good it is: “because he did that thing that made her do that thing”

I love this already. Sending flowers to the Instagram headquarters?! I’m dying —

It’s the little details. Your mind. “Friggin’ FaceID didn’t seem to recognize her, what with her cheeks being so flushed.” It’s so perfect.

“It couldn’t be that easy, right? Twice?”
I swear to god if this doesn’t top the Dundies for 2021 I’m calling the police. I can’t believe you’ve given us more...

You write mature, married JAM so well. Truly. It’s an art form.

Holy shit, BT. Your smut is straight fire. I can’t get over how well written it is.

And the callback to the flowers/Instagram? Just perfection.
And then the group text. “maybe the only group text ever that she didn’t immediately wish she wasn’t a part of”
It’s all so brilliant.

Please tell me there’s a national unicorn day or something & you’re going to drop another bonus chapter of their next encounter?

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I don't know why, but I read the title of this thinking it was maybe a reference to Pam's necklace, or the story she was working on, and this was....so much better than that. Wow. I don't think I realised that I was missing a Danny/Jim/Pam threesome or a Karen/Jim/Pam threesome before this. I also love how you've written both Danny and Karen here, and that Jim and Pam still both feel very in character even in this scenario. “Thinking of a card, too? Dear Instagram, thank you so much for reconnecting my spouse and I with our exes so that we can screw them. Love, The Halperts” really made me laugh. And the ending!!

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I bet you weren't expecting a genuine review! I think this is the first KaPam or KaJam fic I've read set after the show ends and I love that they are all happy and secure here and there isn't all that season 3 angst and baggage. As a lesbian who stayed in a relationship with a man for way too long out of denial and comphet I totally believe that Karen may have stayed with Jim for similar reasons and that she came out later. I really appreciate this fic even if it is an April Fools joke.

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Hot, sexy, gorgeous. I loved it.

Author's Response: tysm, I worked really hard on this chapter!

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Wow it’s hot in here. Need a shower now. WHEW. Steamy and delicious. Loved it.

Also, I’m gonna need the Karen storyline in an epilogue or something STAT.

You’re brilliant.

Author's Response: Thank you so much! And who knows, I maybe could be persuaded to do a part 2...😏

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This is so not the point of this story at all, but what’s a lockout?
Why do I love the way you deftly shift between casual parenting and literal flames sparking between Pam, Jim and talk of unicorns...

“You can be lucky, too, for tonight. If you want.” Dammit, BT, we’re all so lucky with this story. It’s so, so hot and it’s barely kicking off. I just... I’m in actual awe of your writing.

Damn. Damn. Damn. If this is what’s getting us all to hell, I’ll take one non refundable ticket please and thank you. This was incredible. So, so hot.

And then you go and end it with Karen?! And another unicorn reference?! The brilliance. I am overwhelmed. This is the most important story of the year.

Author's Response: A lockout is like when a church youth group all gets together and they literally get locked into a gym or rec center or something (so idk why they call it a lockout and not a lock-in?) and they stay there all night. I’ve been to a few and they were the pinnacle of fun back in the day. Literally up all night with a bunch of other kids, having a blast. And thank you so much for your compliments! They mean so much, especially since I’m constantly in awe of your writing. I can’t say thank you enough!

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Well, great. Now I want one with Karen. BT, you are just too good. I must go now before my brain short circuits.

Author's Response: 😏😉

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Stawwwwp. You absolutely cannot leave Karen out of the fun!

Author's Response: 😏😏😏

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My teetotaler grandmother used to say “gin lips tell the devil’s truth” and I guess now I know what she meant... So here’s how this went...
Little Bird: Someone’s writing a fic where Austin Jam have a threesome.
Me: Did you tell this person about AO3?
Little Bird: Well, it’s Big Tuna and the third is Danny...
Me: Oh well now I’m intrigued and fully support this idea because her stuff is amazing.
Me (after reading): We will now pray to Big Tuna as our patron saint of Women Getting What They Want in the World. We will erect a statue in her honor. Scorned women will cry to Her for retribution and our daughters will sing songs of praise to Her when their partners give foot rubs and pour wine for no reason at all. We will give free tampons in her honor and... (I could keep going but I think you get it.)

I mean. It’s just. so. freaking. good.

Look 2020 has brought A LOT of disappointments. A drop of water doing Something to me? Not even slightly a disappointment. I’ve thought about that little drop off water AND DANNY BITING HIS OWN FINGER too many times today. I’m not sure I’m prepared for what Chapter Two is going to do for me. Let me lie down while I wait for it...

Author's Response: That little bird told me you were in support of this idea and I’m glad I delivered! If my threesome fic can be a bright spot in 2020 for you, I can consider the year a success. Thank you so much! (Also I thought about that water drop and the pinky bite nonstop, too 🥵)