Date: March 26, 2022 08:22 pm Title: "All it really means is that we're friends."
Jim is really trying to hard to be in a
relationship with Karen(and her with Jim).
They simply aren’t compatible. So even if there
was no Pam, they aren’t right for each other.
Their complete lack of chemistry is a big sign of that.
So like I said before, Karen is Jim’s own Roy.
Pam’s mom is right in that Pam should tell Jim how she truly feels, and if he doesn’t reciprocate,
which we know he will, at least Pam will know the truth, instead of wondering about what could have been. That way Pam would also be able to move on.
Date: March 25, 2022 07:35 pm Title: "All it really means is that we're friends."
I'm currently rewatching The Office (it's my partner's first time seeing it in full). We just finished season 3 a few days ago. Reading this story + watching some episodes I haven't seen in a while made me forget how intense some of season 3 is.
I loved the conversation of Pam talking with her mom and finally admitting what happened on Casino Night. I also enjoyed the restaurant conversation between Jim and Karen. I like Karen as a character, but I am obviously a big shipper of J+P so I never really thought much about the inside of Jim and Karen's relationship, other than what the show gave us (late night talks is about all I can think of). Definitely liked seeing what you envisioned for them only starting to think of their future this far in.
I imagine the story is getting close to completion based on the timeline, and I'm looking forward to seeing what you come up with for the final few episodes of season 3. Would love to see another fic based on a different season, such as 4 (l so wish we could've had the full season they had planned!) or maybe 5 or 9. Looking forward to the next chapter! :)
Author's Response: Thanks so much! We are getting close to completion, four more chapters to go. I like your S4/S5 idea, I'll consider that. Gonna need a fluff cleanse after this one. Happy to see you here, I hope you enjoy the rest!
Date: March 24, 2022 11:59 pm Title: "I have no future here."
OMG. I just want to cry. That was so emotional to read! Nice work on the writing again.
Date: March 24, 2022 12:25 pm Title: "I have no future here."
Shout out to the Reno 911 reference. Gosh it takes me back. I love this update. Great work!
Author's Response: Thanks! Appreciate a fellow Reno 911! fan :)
Date: March 22, 2022 04:16 am Title: "I have no future here."
Before I even began reading, the title of this chapter let me know to brace myself.
For Jim, Pam going back to Roy, well I could understand him needing to go numb to it - it was more than just jealousy, it was his pain seeing her with a person like him, who's anger issues put her potentially in harm's way, that she could want a person like him over himself, that he just hated the guy. So I could understand his attitude in the breakroom, it was cruel but maybe the only way he could deal with it - especially after that violence turned towards him and now put even Karen in harm's way (but still it was all about Pam).
***The weekends have become a sort of reprieve for him lately; two precious days where Pam does not have to exist. This weekend, it’s two precious days Pam and Roy don’t have to exist.***
Um Yeah this.
***They say your life flashes before your eyes when you think you’re about to die, but for some reason when Jim sees Roy’s fist headed for his face all he can think about are Dwight’s warnings about bear attacks: how they always come when you least expect them.
At this point, however, he’d prefer the bear.***
This though was a great bit and felt very JIm.
No one of the things you do so well is take a line and give it a whole other dimension - you did it with Don't forget us in your other fic and here the added sting when Jim snaps back with - I’m sure you guys will find your way back to each other someday. - using her own words this time to hurt her. That's what makes these so good.
Another thing your fics do so well is fill in the blank spaces between the show and the rest of what happened - events and what's in their heads...JIm's coming back after his interview to see what he sees puts his confession in a whole other light.
THe circularity of his grabbing her hand in the flashback and then in the end scene - caught that. Oh and that she doesn't want him to drive her home - to where the world with ROy - oooh lady.
But getting to the end - Filling in the space with that car scene was - well I'm kind of speechless - all so well written - so in character...
I'm taking it back - (thank you JIm) - him straight out telling her he doesn't understand what she sees/saw in him and her offering back her plea of insanity - the long coming acknowledgment of their night but the halting stop to the conversation. It all felt so real.
***Tears well in her eyes again, but for the first time in a long time, it’s not because Jim is dating someone else, or because she’s missed her chance with him. It’s because she misses him — this — so much. She can barely remember what it felt like to have someone in her life who cared about her the way he did. The way he always has.***
THIS.
And how this seems to be a small crack in his armor, big enough for her to get in just a bit, a small turning point that aligns with the next episode (where they have fun with the gambling games and join forces to save Michael from almost certain death). But knowing they are not out of the woods yet looking forward to the what you will do to us next.
Magnificent job on this weighty chapter.
Date: March 21, 2022 07:41 pm Title: "I have no future here."
You broke me, girl. You literally broke me. I’m speechless… this CAR SCENE.
Ugh, I felt for Pam earlier when Jim lowkey just snapped on her, but I know it was needed. UGH JUST THIS FUCKING CAR SCENE.
TD, TINYDUNDIE, OUCH TIMES A THOUSAND GIRL 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
Date: March 21, 2022 07:40 pm Title: "I hope that someone gets my message in a bottle"
I will start off with something that I have mentioned numerous times before: I hate Jewel. I hate her voice, that fucking song, the fact that I had to hear her sing over and over again on a CD at my previous job. Therefore, I will never like that *that* was Pam and Roy’s song.
Now that that’s out of the way…
TD MY HEART!!! Ugh, I wish I could just shake Pam and be like “GIRL DON’T LEAVE WITH ROY. PLEASE DON’T!” Poor Jim, to have to witness her make that choice a SECOND TIME?!
I also really LOVED how you handled his DUI and everything. It was beautiful.
And that flashback to the convention OUCH MY HEART.
BEAUTIFUL, TD! I loved this!
Date: March 21, 2022 04:04 pm Title: "I have no future here."
The opening here I think captures quite well how unpleasant and exhausting this moving on process is for Jim, and how frustrating it is for him to have it interrupted, how embarrassing it is. You're in my humble opinion spot on with why Jim reacts the way he does during the Heartbreak in the Breakroom... he just sees this as Pam forcing him right back into the same old role, and he's beyond done with it.
This glimpse into the past is terrific and wildly painful. Pam being mostly sure that Roy would never hurt her but not *quite* being able to resist the thought that he could... ow. And the way it's normalized for her and remains horrifying and infuriating for Jim, the way Pam justifies it to herself and how Jim has to face that... chills, man.
AND YOU WORKED IN THE THING STUCK IN HER SHOE.
100% buy that Jim not knowing about the scene at Poor Richard's makes a huge difference in how he reacts here.
"Tears well in her eyes again, but for the first time in a long time, it’s not because Jim is dating someone else, or because she’s missed her chance with him. It’s because she misses him — this — so much. She can barely remember what it felt like to have someone in her life who cared about her the way he did. The way he always has." DEAD.
Date: March 21, 2022 01:53 pm Title: "I have no future here."
The attack scene was well written. It was like
it was happening in slow motion. Jim can be cruel,
but at least he had the decency to apologize.
Plus,I have to give him credit for admitting that
he deserved to get punched by Roy.
Unfortunately, Pam didn’t speak up for herself
and was honest about the real reason she
got back with Roy, because it was Jim’s fault.
Karen is predictable and territorial.
She is Jim’s Roy. Except with violence, Karen uses
words.
Date: March 21, 2022 10:17 am Title: "I have no future here."
Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
That's the feeling I got at the end of this chapter. Just a mind blank what the hell just happened moment. Here I am emotionally ready to be destroyed by what I feel IS the lowest point of Jim and Pam's relationship and it hit as hard as I figured it would. Jim's words in the break room are just harsh. He's intentionally being dismissive to her. He knows better than anyone what would drive a knife in even deeper. And he says it. It's already hard enough.
Then that flashback. Oh, holy crap that flashback. When we got to Pam's portion of it and it was her that said that line first? I literally stopped reading for about a minute to try and process it. Jim's line to Pam in canon was bad enough. Now he's throwing one of her own lines, from the freaking parking lot of doom no less, back at her! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!
Now I get why Jim is pissed and why Pam is so upset. It all fits of course. But then the ending scene. THIS FRICKIN' ENDING SCENE IN PAM'S CAR!!!!
How do you do it? I honestly want to know! How do you go from the worst moment of their relationship, to finally breathing a bit of oxygen back into their lives? I mean good on Jim for coming back to apologize. He needed to of course because he was a complete ass to her in the break room. But that here when it all seems like there's nothing but darkness, there's still one small ember left glowing. It's not a flame, it's not even a spark. It's an ember buried under a deep laying of ash. Ash that's been drowned in a flood of tears, stirred up and left to die, but deep down, there's still one ember of the
Jim and Pam we know that remains. One small area no tear could extinguish. It's barely there, but it's enough. Considering your skill as a wordsmith, I'm really looking forward to seeing how that ember starts to glow brighter from here on out.
Bravo on a chapter that tore me up and still gave me hope in the course of the reading. Just superb.
Date: March 20, 2022 11:12 am Title: "Secret secrets are no fun. Secret secrets hurt someone."
"She wishes she had an Excel spreadsheet open to follow this conversation." LOL
I love all the "behind the scenes" you give us, like Karen and Jim after he admits he still has feelings for Pam. It makes so much sense, and I love that you mentioned how Jim is aware of how tightly Karen is clinging to their relationship and how badly he wants to move forward. And their texts when we wakes up after Diwali! Somehow heartwarming and heartbreaking all at once.
Date: March 20, 2022 10:50 am Title: "Pay no attention to the spirits that haunt this hallowed ground."
"He smiles, and his cheeks hurt. He supposes that's what happens to muscles you don't really use anymore."
OUCH.
You're so good at subtle one-liners that shatter me. Still loving this so much!
Date: March 18, 2022 05:19 pm Title: "You're left thinking about the girl you really like, the one that broke your heart."
What the Dundie give us in JAM tidbits the Dundie taketh away in angst. And yet, here I am reading it anyway because this is so fricking good.
Date: March 18, 2022 05:17 pm Title: "That was what today was supposed to be. The loving union between people."
Here’s the thing. I struggle with angst at times because I so want them together (I’ll admit it, I’d be happy if this site was just full of post S3 summer fics) but this is so well written I enjoyed it anyway, despite the angst. The power of JAM compels us!
Date: March 17, 2022 09:20 am Title: "I hope that someone gets my message in a bottle"
Not going to lie, I was getting worried when we got to this point of S3. We're really getting into what I've always considered the lowest point of the JAM relationship. As always you wrote it really well.
With everything Pam's going through you really get the real sense of why she'd get back with Roy. She's hurting, lonely, feeling unseen, and even a bit betrayed. Despite everything, Roy was a steady and constant part of her life for years. I fully get why she'd be so drawn back to that sort of comfort zone. Though I'm very glad she stood up for herself and told him no to sex. I could see why she might go that route, but the way you describe her feelings here, it makes complete sense that that kind of physical contact isn't what she really needs.
Pam's flashback to where Roy asked her to bail him out was a great counterpoint. How she was starting to really be honest and stand up for herself. Yet she still can't quite tell the whole truth.
Jim's flashback stung too. To hear Pam is out on a date I'm sure would have hit his heart hard. After the two rejections on Casino Night and then being lost in all this thoughts over the summer, yeah I don't blame him for needing a moment.
Then at the wedding, you really paint the picture as to why he's so upset. He'd been trying to just stay friendly with Pam, even though he knows it's never just friendly with her. Then to see her walk out with Roy, yeah makes sense he'd throw up the walls and get kind of defensive.
Date: March 16, 2022 09:04 pm Title: "I hope that someone gets my message in a bottle"
This notion of Pam feeling worse due to the little hints of hope she's getting feels spot on. I'd imagine Jim of all people can probably relate well to it. If it weren't for that, maybe she (or he in earlier seasons) could just move on and start to heal. But it really tears the scab right off.
I continue to love this notion of Roy capturing her, intentionally or unintentionally, at vulnerable moments and her just kind of rolling with it. Feels important and fitting to their story. There's a good mix of genuine happiness and also glaring red flags that this relationship should not have survived high school graduation in your take on their history.
"But his attention makes her weak. Attention of any kind has always made her weak." OW. Oh, this Roy... like, he's clearly doing his best and his best is just... still not at all good.
"It’s more than drunk, it’s quite clearly disorderly." Too true. Ugh. Again. Roy showing a lot of signs of not taking Pam's no seriously here. And him taking her bailing him out of jail as a sign she's prepared for a come-on is too Roy for his own good. Him needing to be reminded that there was a long time for things to change between him asking her to marry him and her breaking it off is ALSO very Roy.
The transition between Pam and Jim's past POVs STINGS. And I think you did well capturing the devastation of Jim realizing that she's left Roy and STILL doesn't want him.
"It’s amazing what being fought for can do for one’s self-esteem." Yeppers. I think this is a good insight.
Oh, Delilah. She must just be clamping a hand over her mouth some days.
Yikes. The ending. Ow. OW.
Author's Response: Thanks as always for your review and your help. Writing Roy is more fun than I thought it would be, heh.
Date: March 16, 2022 05:02 am Title: "I hope that someone gets my message in a bottle"
Arggh- I just wrote a whole review and then going back to check something I lost it --man I hate that- anyway I'll start again.
You really got at the loneliness, jealously and regret that was going on inside Pam at that wedding.
I'm also fascinated to see the takes on how Pam and Roy got together. Yours with the history of the song sheds new light on her choice to leave with him. His showing up again, while the song played, while she was at her weakest - I could see how she would need the comfort of something familiar even if was something she knew was still not right, but there was hope it could be.
--He doesn’t tell her that, however, and she falls asleep with “Fields of Gold” still echoing inside her head as she lay in Roy’s arms. She can’t help but feel like she’s gone home with silver.--
This to me what the golden line of this chapter. There definitely is a intentional use of symbolic gold throughout this show and I just love when it is featured in fics and I love how you point out the contrast here.
So it is Pam that he calls to bail him out when he gets the DUI? But it makes sense - they may not have been right but that history doesn't go away in an instance and yeah, who else would he call? That it presents him with the opportunity to ask her why, I'll take that too.
I did notice how she even sort of blames herself for not telling him sooner how she felt (sign it is still that just post season 2 Pam who is still growing) but glad she stood her ground even if it still hurt her to see him that way.
What worked so well was the juxtapositioning of those last lines of this flashback with the opening ones Jim's - nicely done. How he hears about the date and his musings over why she hasn't told him:
--There’s only one answer, really, and he hates it: it’s because it doesn’t matter. He doesn’t matter. What happened with Pam and Roy has nothing to do with him, and that much is obvious from her clear intention to move on from all of it.--
Oh poor Jim here.
And poor Karen at the end- she's just the bandaid (He won't kid himself - oh but you are Jim) - right now Jim's like a child thinking its the bandaid that makes the boo-boo not hurt.
Another well done chapter. So much so I wrote my review twice.
Author's Response: Thanks for taking the time to let me know what you think, I truly appreciate it!
Date: March 15, 2022 12:19 pm Title: "I hope that someone gets my message in a bottle"
The wedding is the episode I hate the most because it really feels between Jim’s ‘hypothetical’ and Pam staring at Jim and Karen all night, there was a glimmer of hope for them, which just got trampled all over.
Having said that, this chapter as much as I didn’t want to read it (not your writing, the content!), was really well done. I ached for Pam just wanting to be held, and Jim’s flashback piecing together about the wedding being called off was really great.
Author's Response: Thanks for powering through... things will get better soon. :)
Date: March 15, 2022 10:53 am Title: "I hope that someone gets my message in a bottle"
Jim is really getting on my nerves.
He uses Karen as a buffer between Pam and himself,
but he can’t see that Pam is doing the same thing with Roy because of Jim. 🤦r05;a92;a039;
Jim can’t see that he’s the one pushing Pam towards Roy because he’s too busy thinking about his own hurt feelings, and treating Pam like trash.
I can understand why Roy would want an explanation for Pam breaking up with him right before their wedding. However, I can see why Pam wasn’t completely honest with Roy considering how crazy he can get, and especially since Jim was gone to her.
In many ways Jim is no better than Roy. Both guys are very selfish, juvenile and makes their relationship with Pam all about themselves. At this point in the season Pam (and even Karen) should have told Jim to F off.
Date: March 12, 2022 06:34 pm Title: "Secret secrets are no fun. Secret secrets hurt someone."
Ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow! I mean seriously. This one just stings the whole way. Jim's still not able to be truthful. He's still leading Karen on because of his omissions. The only thing I can say for him here is that he didn't tell Karen he loved her, but other than that he's really not great here. Now I get the fact he's in the middle of probably the worse year of his life, but after awhile that excuse wears thin. His relationship with Karen should have ended there. But he's just to damn scared and thus he'll end up inflicting more pain on himself, on Karen, and sadly on Pam too.
The middle sections brought us up a little. Jim and Pam at least communicating, but it's still strained and while it kind of feel like "them" it's just...not.
Then Pam's section. To be set up with how she holds onto the memories of their Kiss. How it's the one and last thing of the real Jim and Pam she clings to. And then for hear from Karen that apparently to Jim it was, "just a kiss." That's a knife to her heart that stabs deep.
However, there was that tiny bit of foreshadowing I caught there. That when she finally does find her courage, she'll be ready to walk through fire. It'll be a refining fire too that will produce pure gold, but right now there's still a lot of slag over her heart.
Author's Response: Oof yeah, thing will definitely get worse before they get better. Ah, season 3. (Also, very ironic that you mentioned "gold" seeing as what's coming up...) Thanks as always for reading and reviewing!
Date: March 12, 2022 05:06 pm Title: "Secret secrets are no fun. Secret secrets hurt someone."
The bookending of the music references was a nice way to show just how they really are meant to be together:
J- Dating Karen is like singing a song he doesn’t know; he wants it to sound right, he just can’t find the melody.
P - He says it again, that phrase she’s been hearing over and over in her head, like one of those songs that burrows its way into your mind until it’s all you can think about. The melody is so familiar it’s soothing. Like any good earworm, however, she doesn’t know all the words, so her brain starts making them up, filling in the blanks. Here and now, it doesn’t matter what is right and what is wrong: this song – their song – is perfect.
I really am glad that he didn't say I love you - that he wasn't that kind of an asshole!
Yeah I wish they would just be brave again - him to be truthful to Karen and himself and let what he knows is a rebound end and her to finish that last text with what she meant to write.
Speaking of text - their text conversations both the ones before and after the kiss were so them - very in character with the banter.
NOw I don't know much about TLOR but I still enjoyed the way you made the ring the metaphor for the kiss.
Oh and I'm terrified of what you are going to do to me (in a good way) with what you've subtly alluded to coming next.
Date: March 12, 2022 10:51 am Title: "Secret secrets are no fun. Secret secrets hurt someone."
Jim assuming that Karen would break up with him as soon as he confessed he still had feelings for Pam is a very good touch... and I do like this sense of Jim as just being kind of swept along into keeping it going at this moment. Fits a general pattern of passivity.
Yeah, Karen, Pam's actions don't make sense to us either. (But also, holy crap, lady, RUN. WHILE YOU STILL CAN. AND BEFORE HE LEAVES YOU CRYING AT A FOUNTAIN. HYPOTHETICALLY. His not being willing to say I love you is a good moment for Jim but also should be a MAJOR warning sign for Karen.)
The text message exchange is well done and seems like it would have fit in well with canon - both feeding Jim's hopelessness and allowing Pam to assume that the door is actually open. (It's also a really good illustration of the key problem with Season 3 Pam's approach - she's using the exact sort of signals she's told Jim not to pay attention to.) "He gets dressed, not realizing he’s rolled his sleeves up to his elbows" says it all.
Okay, and this Pam POV from Ben Franklin? Ow. OWwwwwwwwwwwWwwwww. OWWWWWWWWWWWWWW.
Date: March 12, 2022 08:43 am Title: "Secret secrets are no fun. Secret secrets hurt someone."
Another great chapter (I feel this is how I start all of my reviews for this story)
“But now that it’s over between them he instead feels an unanticipated sense of relief; he doesn’t have to lie to her anymore, he doesn’t have to pretend.” I can just imagine how relieved Jim felt after his revelation in the conference room. I certainly breathed a sigh of relief the first time around hoping that was the end of it. Oh how wrong I was.
“He doesn’t even know what he wants anymore. “I guess... I just figured this was over.”” I thought this was just perfectly written for Jim’s state of mind.
“It doesn’t matter how much he likes Karen: she isn’t Pam.” Yes, so much this.
“She didn’t,” he says. It’s the one thing he’s certain of. “She doesn’t.” Oh Jim, you couldn’t be more wrong.
“But all it took was one good prank, one good laugh for him to realize the truth: that today is the first time he’s really felt like himself in months. And he liked it.” Again this is just so perfect.
“He wants to get over Pam. He wants to, badly. The only thing he wants more is to be with her, and that isn’t going to happen.” Oh I clutched my heart here.
I loved the whole text message interactions and them both worrying about keeping the conversation going. I always like to believe that Jim did text her back, at least one message the next day.
“He gets dressed, not realizing he’s rolled his sleeves up to his elbows.” I loved this.
The whole part of Pam replaying the kiss and changing it to what she wished it could was great. I wish it changed too!
Poor Pam thinking Jim lied to her about this kiss. I just wanted to hug her at that point.
“Fucking hell, what is she saying? Stop talking, Pam.” This had me laughing so much.
“And maybe just like the One Ring – just like Jim has done – she ought to finally destroy it for good.” Dear god no, don’t do that.
Can’t wait for the next chapter!
Date: March 11, 2022 05:58 pm Title: "Secret secrets are no fun. Secret secrets hurt someone."
THE DAMN LOTR REFERENCE, TD.
THAT. DAMN. REFERENCE.
Goddammit, Jim. You *had* to spoil that one, sacred thing you and Pam shared to Karen? Ugh...
THANK YOU for Jim responding to Pam's text at Diwali. I've always been under the assumption that he never responded, but part of me believed he totally would have. I'm happy he did!
Date: March 11, 2022 05:56 pm Title: "Pay no attention to the spirits that haunt this hallowed ground."
Oh Jim, you will *never* get over pranking.
And of course, you'll never get over that addiction to Pam.
UGH TD, THIS WAS BEAUTIFUL. I have an addiction to your writing. Sorry, not sorry.
Author's Response: Thanks, lady!