1 [Report This]Date: March 11, 2022 11:00 am Title: "Secret secrets are no fun. Secret secrets hurt someone."
The details in this story. EEEK they are so good!
“So… you made a move on her while she was with someone else and she told you no? That’s not really what you said before.”
I agree with you Karen that’s weird to kiss someone after they turned you down.
Author's Response: Thank you so much!
Date: March 11, 2022 10:35 am Title: "Secret secrets are no fun. Secret secrets hurt someone."
Jim is such an ass, and he can’t even see it because he’s too busy playing the poor me card.
Karen is a sad woman. Chasing after a guy who she knows really doesn’t want her, like a teenager with a crush. She took a risk of letting herself get hurt.
I have no sympathy for Karen when it blows up in her face.
Pam has every right to be hurt and angry at Jim.
By saying it was just a kiss to Karen made seem as though Jim only told Pam he loved her to get in her pants. If Pam were to start giving Jim the cold shoulder it would be understandable.
1 [Report This]Date: March 09, 2022 06:40 am Title: "Pay no attention to the spirits that haunt this hallowed ground."
Feels like this is the burst of oxygen they both needed to keep going. Pam getting Jim to smile at her because of the art contest and Jim getting Pam to smile because of the prank. As we know there are darker days yet to come to be sure, but for right now, there's at least a glimmer of light.
Thing is that had they followed that glimmer it probably would have led them to where they would eventually end up just that much quicker. Ah well, that's what S3 fix it fics are for. Great job as always getting into their heads and fleshing out the scenes.
Author's Response: Thanks warrior!
1 [Report This]Date: March 09, 2022 04:12 am Title: "Pay no attention to the spirits that haunt this hallowed ground."
So this was a chapter I was hoarding those beans for. I absolutely loved this chapter.
It wasn't just the way put me right there in that spot with Pam, wanting her to have a friend in Karen, but understanding how every conversation with her was going to sting. How hearing how Karen was in her own rehabilitation phase, not yet ready for another relationship until she found something perfect presented itself. Perfect that could have been Pam's perfect if she'd only just... yeah this hurt.
But then her old Jim shows up for her, even if just for a blip, to join in her pride and happiness about winning the art contest.
For me though, the jewel of this chapter was their conversations. Pam's holding on to her little tidbit about Dwanglea and her silent pleading that he would just ask her WHY.
Jim's POV side where you gave us such delicious banter but also the little bit of holding back -not taking any chances with her anymore. On and also gave us these lines:
'He’s glad she doesn’t have someone holding her back anymore: dead weight in a warehouse jumpsuit callously crushing her dreams.'
He smiles, and his cheeks hurt. He supposes that's what happens to muscles you don't really use anymore. (oh Jim)
Closing it all us with the cell phone prank -tbh - not sure I got why he needed her on the show's version but you explain it perfectly - it wasn't about her help as much as getting HER to notice and smile -'Her smile is like oxygen; when he sees it he suddenly remembers how to breathe properly.'
The whole bit about them being in step, not missing a beat, how he hasn't found this unspoken dance with Karen yet.
Then more great banter and then closing it up with this :
'The pranks aren’t his addiction, they’re just his enabler. His real addiction is Pam.'
This was a fantastic chapter - I gave it one (I know I'll be needing some for later) but it gave me a sugar high as if I had ingested a whole bagful.
Author's Response: Your review made my day. Thanks as always! 💗
1 [Report This]Date: March 08, 2022 09:21 am Title: "Pay no attention to the spirits that haunt this hallowed ground."
Ouch. The opening of this remains extremely painful.
"Pam immediately regrets having brought up Jim at all. Twice." Yep. You're not subtle, sister. And “in between boyfriends” being a Karen-ism is a nice touch. This is again a situation where I feel pretty bad for both of them - you can just sense Karen trying to bond and to find out more about Jim here.
Ugh. I remain deeply mad they cut the Pam won an art contest story, and this just makes the whole thing a worse loss. Let Pam have a win dammit!
"He isn’t here, that’s all she knows. He may as well be on the moon." OW.
"for the next several minutes it feels the same way it always did: their familiar back and forth, this dance they do, two-stepping around the very large elephant in the room." LOVE this metaphor.
"While she desperately wants him to, she knows it has to be her turn. But “Yeah, me too,” is all she says." ARGHHHHH.
I think you did well capturing how disastrous this call would have felt for a Jim who is determined to move on. Oh, and the discovery that *Pam* is his real addiction... damn. (I'm also pleased you found a way to make Pam's participation in this prank make a difference, as opposed to being just for the hell of it... on screen it's not totally clear why Jim *needed* a partner.)
Author's Response: I’m glad you picked up on Pam’s “job” in that prank. It never really confused me why he gave her the phone, what confused me was why they were so loud about it all in front of Karen 😆
1 [Report This]Date: March 08, 2022 09:10 am Title: "Pay no attention to the spirits that haunt this hallowed ground."
Another great chapter 👏
“He can’t help but reach out to instinctively tuck a loose strand of hair behind her ear, but then jerks his hand away like he’s touched a hot stove.” Ugh this was such a great line and captures so much of what Jim’s experiencing. Loved it
“His real addiction is Pam.” YES, so much this
In the midst of this all, “I dusted off an oldie” made me smile so much and immediately made me think of that blooper! So great
Can’t wait for the next chapter!
Author's Response: Thank you so much! I’m so happy you picked up on that blooper reference!
Date: March 04, 2022 04:45 am Title: "There's such a thing as good grief. Just ask Charlie Brown."
Ok first off - lay off the Libras!!!! We often see what others miss being so in tune with deeper meanings and being so observant. Jim, however not showing his Libra qualities this whole season.
But poor Jim and poor Pam. Oh how my heart aches for both of them after reading what they each were struggling through.
'Unfortunately, alone with his thoughts is not the best place for Jim to be. Alone with his thoughts only makes him realize he misses Pam more than he misses Karen. Alone with his thoughts only reminds him that he’s no better off now than he was last May.'
This really got to me somehow even if it was apparent all that season in the show. You did a great job of bringing out wishy washy Jim - this time in his wavering with Karen but how dare you have them kissing in the sacred parking lot!
Oh and she wants to tell Toby - that was rich.
Her lack of interest in his past with Pam annoys him for some reason.
I'm so on board with this. It's one line that says so much.
Re: the flashback where things starts with Karen-the whole bit about the signals and being wrong before and being careful makes a lot of sense and feels very real. I love that he thinks he wants to evolve and dating Karen is the way to do it, but more so because he thinks it is what Pam is doing.
Oh wow the chapter with Michael and Pam though - I was really into that-maybe because I usually love their relationship but here, even if it was naivety and innocent blunders at play, I was a bit irked at Michael for not having a filter and not understanding the hurt he was causing. And Pam's not understanding why Jim would be confiding in Michael (again- guess he also has a way of bringing out the truth in Jim - he's Jim's Delilah) - guess in canon she never did learn the extent of what went down on the boat (unlike in 360). I do think you nailed Michael in him thinking Jim is his best friend (oh and how sad is that).
Wrapping up the chapter with Pam grieving her friendship with Jim says so much about the actions to come from her. Looking forward to how you portray them.
Author's Response: Ha, sorry, I didn't mean to slander Libras. I think Jim did use his Libra qualities (or attempted to), he just rarely arrived at the correct answer. Poor Jim.
1 [Report This]Date: March 03, 2022 08:24 pm Title: "There's such a thing as good grief. Just ask Charlie Brown."
Oh hi, just me singing your praises again.
I love how you describe Jim and Karen's origins and Jim's thought process of knowing he's not over Pam but desperately trying to be. Poor dude.
As always, very believable and very well written and very...ouch. I loved it
1 [Report This]Date: March 03, 2022 08:08 pm Title: "You're left thinking about the girl you really like, the one that broke your heart."
"She waits for “Beesly” to tumble off his tongue. It doesn’t."
Oooof. My heart.
"He makes it to lunch and congratulates himself on not breaking down at any point throughout the morning, especially after spotting the mug in the kitchen cabinet emblazoned with the quote “Friendship is certainly the finest balm for the pangs of disappointed love.” There was, unfortunately, no mug with helpful advice for the person who had lost both."
Why are you so good at breaking my heart?
But seriously, your writing is fantastic here. You can *feel* the ache from both of them and it's heartbreaking in the best way.
I also love how you mention Pam being single and how she likes it, despite missing Jim because that's 100% my headcanon. I think that summer especially was super important for her.
Author's Response: I'm so glad someone mentioned the mug because it's one of my favorite parts! And yes, Independent Pam is a thing of beauty, I wish we saw more of it.
1 [Report This]Date: March 03, 2022 05:29 pm Title: "There's such a thing as good grief. Just ask Charlie Brown."
TINY.DUNDIE. THE GRIEVING PROCESS?! REALLY?! YOU'RE GONNA HIT US WITH FIVE STAGES OF GRIEF OF PAM AND JIM'S FRIENDSHIP?! OUCH!!!!!
Oh my god, this was utterly brilliant. If you keep this up, I'm gonna be a broken mess on the floor (but please keep doing this).
I also can't wait to hear more about Karen's holidays and her family's disdain of her moving
1 [Report This]Date: March 03, 2022 03:47 pm Title: "There's such a thing as good grief. Just ask Charlie Brown."
"He can’t quite put his finger on it but for a moment he has to remind himself which year it is." Ouch. This is a very strong Jim Season 3 vibe.
"She claims she has unpacking to do but seems a little distant." !!!! I really am going to need to reread this all in light of the ***** *******.
"“I still don’t know how you did it.” He bites his lip. He can’t tell her how he did it." Again, very effectively making me hurt for both Karen *and* Jim here. As noted earlier, I also think you did well putting Jim's odd reaction to Karen wanting to move several blocks away form him in a more understandable context - this is genuinely a LOT all at once. "He’s run out of yeses for the time being" sounds about right, as does the idea that there's way more pressure on this relationship than there would be if she hadn't moved.
“Are you kidding? I’m sure she’s told the security guard and everyone at Vance Refrigeration by now.” Fact check: TRUE.
"omitting the fact that whether she knows it or not she’s already entangled in workplace romance drama." Oh, Jim. Buddy. This is not a good look on you.
"But the way she looks at him makes him weak. The way she looks at him always makes him weak." RUDE. And again, this thing about how he's trying *not* to interpret everything as a coded overture... yep. That's Season 3 Jim all right. And him interpreting this as a return to normal is PAINFUL knowing what's really happening out of his eyeline.
"But he’s replayed those precious seconds over and over again in his mind so many times by now that he knows Pam's kiss like a favorite song." OW.
"It doesn’t feel like a lie. The last few months have felt longer than the four years that preceded them." OW. AGAIN. They're just... ugh. So close to avoiding so much pain here and they just can't pull it off.
This is SO Michael. He's so well meaning and so damaging all at once. And it finally occurring to him that Jim told him not to say anything when Pam follows up is genius.
Pam going through the full stages of grief is such a great tie-in with canon...
1 [Report This]Date: March 03, 2022 12:53 pm Title: "There's such a thing as good grief. Just ask Charlie Brown."
Jim treating Pam like trash, while acting as
if he’s so sweet and innocent is the main reason why I couldn’t stand him in season three(and nine).
Jim is the one who started the problem with Pam in the first place. I can’t say I blame Karen’s parents for not being happy about their daughter moving to another state for a guy she hardly knows.
Typical Michael making everything about himself.
Even though Pam is grieving for her friendship with Jim, that grief can help her move on, and become indifferent to Jim and Karen’s relationship. 🤔
Pam doesn’t need someone in her life that will treat her like someone less than worthy. That’s what Roy did.
1 [Report This]Date: March 03, 2022 11:27 am Title: "There's such a thing as good grief. Just ask Charlie Brown."
Ughhh Karen and Jim making it official in ‘their’ parking lot really stung me.
“omitting the fact that whether she knows it or not she’s already entangled in workplace romance drama.” So so true
I loved how seamlessly Pam’s actual talking head fit with the rest of the dialogue. You’ve written all the dialogue just brilliantly here.
God my heart can’t take much more of this
Date: March 03, 2022 11:02 am Title: "There's such a thing as good grief. Just ask Charlie Brown."
Once more you're doing a great job of filling in what we didn't see on camera. The way their thoughts are still constantly revolving around each other. They're both still so lost in a world of assumptions, pain, and doubt. You can tell Jim is doing his best to move on with Karen and has been for a while with that flashback scene. His heart still isn't fully in it though. Almost as if he's doing his best to convince himself that what he's doing is right. From his perspective it probably feels like it. Pam rejected him twice. Told him he was misinterpreting. Rather than reach out to him, he finds out she's going out on dates. Really, he has every reason to think Pam wants nothing to do with him romantically. So, he keeps trying to go along with Karen hoping it'll work out. His fear and doubt are still holding him back though.
Same with Pam. The flashback scene with Michael was somewhat brutal to envision. However, I did like that she went in and told him right to his face that what he said was painful for her. For a moment Michael loses his selfishness and realizes that he was out of line. Nice way to bring that in. Pam realizing what Jim had to go through while she was with Roy must have hurt too. She knows what will fix things, but she doesn't quite have the courage to reach for it yet. It's coming, but she's not there in her journey yet. So she tries to be the friend he was to her. But with her knowing how she feels and now how he felt, I get why it would cause her to break down like that.
Excellent job getting into their heads even if it stings the whole way.
1 [Report This]Date: March 01, 2022 01:27 pm Title: "You're left thinking about the girl you really like, the one that broke your heart."
This was such an interesting perspective on Jim’s thoughts of why he accepted the CIA gift eventually. I really felt bad for Pam when he did that knowingly, but then I thought of how many Pam made him feel like that unknowingly.
Thank you for sharing your work and I can’t wait for future chapters. d84;a039;
1 [Report This]Date: March 01, 2022 01:24 pm Title: "That was what today was supposed to be. The loving union between people."
You are now my favourite writer. No offence to basscop69 and boredhwswf who are like my all time favourite and all other incredible writers out there.
Season 3 angst is something I’ll never get over and I just adore all the work which dwells into their minds and hearts, sharing their take on what happened beyond the cameras.
It was hurtful, painful, full of yearning and heartbreaking but they had to dip that low in their relationship arc to come up ever so in love.
This is awesome !
Author's Response: Thank you so much for your kind words! Glad you're joining me on this journey and thanks so much for reviewing!
Date: February 28, 2022 09:15 pm Title: "You're left thinking about the girl you really like, the one that broke your heart."
Ok so not quite as painful as last chapter. What I like here is that even though thing are still not great between them, their connection still remains. Jim's prank on Pam sending Andy after her and Pam's Christmas gift were some of the real highlights we got. A much needed break from, well everything. The extra bits you put in in the elevator and parking lot were great too. Pam's trying to reach out to him. He's still hesitant to be sure but even now I think deep down he knows his feelings for her haven't changed.
The flashback scenes seemed fitting too. Pam's finally looking out for what she wants. It may be a bit bleak when one is first starting out, but it just leaves more open canvas on which to paint. Jim though was still reeling in his flashback. That Andy was the one to give him that post-it note to smile was a nice touch. Andy can be a bit much, but he is a decent guy. Nice to see him looking out for someone he would consider a buddy.
Great job as usual.
1 [Report This]Date: February 28, 2022 06:39 pm Title: "You're left thinking about the girl you really like, the one that broke your heart."
You know me and my love for independent Pam in season 3 where she does everything that she couldn’t when she was with Roy…
I love the insight to her new, single life!!
BUT OUCH THE MEETING OF KAREN THOUGH 😭😭😭 Ugh ouches…
Still, TD, keep amazing us with this fic please
1 [Report This]Date: February 27, 2022 11:31 pm Title: "You're left thinking about the girl you really like, the one that broke your heart."
Already my poor heart can’t take this, you’ve written this angst so wonderfully well here.
The sea serpent made me chuckle, nice touch there
Great to see Jim continuing the faxing prank back in Scranton, and I loved how Pam felt connected to him from Stamford when he did that. How she would know, without knowing, that it was Jim.
‘everything is new and slightly terrifying, but she hopes in time she will emerge as something different. Someone different.’ I feel like this is such an important line for Pam. She needed that time to grow as her own person before jumping into another relationship.
I love how you’ve explained Jim having tuna for lunch, it makes so much sense he’d want everything to be different from Scranton, including his wardrobe and lunch.
‘He feels butterflies at her mention of the teapot, and can feel the quicksand creeping up his legs.’ Gahh this line! From already thinking about the teapot being behind her desk to her talking about it as such a great present, poor Jim
Really great chapter, but can we skip to the good part? Just kidding, but kinda. My heart!!! Please don’t kill me with the next chapter
Author's Response: Apologies to your heart, but it's gonna get much worse before it gets any better. Sorry about that. Thanks again for reading!
Date: February 27, 2022 07:48 pm Title: "You're left thinking about the girl you really like, the one that broke your heart."
Right from the chapter title I knew this one was going to tear me up little bits at a time - and whoa did begining with this line:
She waits for “Beesly” to tumble off his tongue. It doesn’t.
That stung. But you brought it around a little with all the stuff with the Andy prank - that was fun.
Now you know how I feel about Independent Pam - just wish she had discovered some of this independence a little sooner so she could be enjoying it with him instead of ruing the fact that 'Sometimes the brain works faster than the heart'. what a great line.
Getting to the Jim POVs - I really enjoyed getting some of the backstories from the early days in Stamford. How and why he came to get Tuna that day and how along with the nickname bestowed on him from Andy was the post-it note that said smile. I like this new head canon for where it came from and why.
It was interesting that Andy was insightful enough to know about his heartbreak.
'today is about survival' was the line here in this memory that tore at my heart a drop more.
Oh and that mention of the second string camera crew.
And then just as there was a little bit of hope:
He can’t keep doing this to himself, he can’t.
Explains a lot.
Even knowing how this story turns out its still tugging at my heart in the best possible way. Great job as usual giving the peek at what going on in their heads and adding some new backstories.
Looking forward to have my heart tugged a little more with the next chapter.
Date: February 27, 2022 04:38 pm Title: "You're left thinking about the girl you really like, the one that broke your heart."
I love how Pam mad the sea serpent look like
Karen. 😂
Jim wanted Pam to make a move to him about her feelings, but ignores the fact that he has given her plenty of reasons to think that he doesn’t care about her anymore. I think that shows how Jim didn’t handle things very well in season 3.
Author's Response:
You're right that Jim's behavior in S3 isn't great, particularly near the end, but I have a great deal of sympathy for him. He was rejected twice (three times if you consider Pam's lack of contact after breaking things off with Roy) so regardless of his persisting feelings for her, I genuinely believe a lot of his behavior was out of self-protection.
Thanks for reading and reviewing!
1 [Report This]Date: February 27, 2022 11:10 am Title: "You're left thinking about the girl you really like, the one that broke your heart."
Okay, the sea serpent bit I feel like is new to me and is a fun detail. Not so fun (but terrific) details abound here, really. Pam noticing his fabric softener has changed, the noticeable lack of Beesly-ing.
Pam's desperation to find their old normal again is tough, and the use of Season 2 moments recast in a whole new awkward way is quite well done.
"Every day for lunch she eats defrosted chicken and fish from the wedding that never happened, and each bite is a grainy, chalky reminder of what she’d given up Jim for: something cold and bland and perfunctory." Oooof. Making this about what she lost with Jim instead of ROy is a whole new level of pain.
"Years of moments now haunt her daily, the knowledge that every time he’d gotten up from his desk to chat with her, he’d been in love with her. When he’d elbowed Roy in the face during that basketball game, he’d been in love with her. When he’d convinced Michael not to embarrass her for the third year running at the Dundies, he’d been in love with her. When he'd stood at the railing of that booze cruise ship gazing into her eyes as she waited for him to change her life, he’d been in love with her." OUCH.
Cheating here, but some really interesting seeds being planted in the Stamford section - justifications for the role of Mama Halpert, and I'm very eager for the XXXXX chapter to see the light now.
"Pam’s laugh is infrequent lately. He never had to try very hard before to hear it, and now it’s like trying to catch lightning in a bottle." OW. And this take on Jim as someone who even at this late moment is desperately waiting for Pam to do something adds a whole new agony to Season 3.
1 [Report This]Date: February 26, 2022 05:49 am Title: "That was what today was supposed to be. The loving union between people."
I've mostly avoided rewatching season 3 because, excellent as it was, the angst was pretty overpowering. You've done a really great job of capturing that here, getting into the minds of each of them, and exploring that with lovely imagery and great insights. Looking forward to more.
Thanks for posting.
Author's Response: Season 3 is rough. I remember watching it live and wanting to die. I suppose I'm a masochist, as I'm essentially recreating that experience... but I do love pain. Thanks so much for reading and suffering along with me!
1 [Report This]Date: February 25, 2022 02:51 pm Title: "That was what today was supposed to be. The loving union between people."
Beautiful writing here, and looking forward for more to come.
But dammit it’s made me want to reread House with a Terrace, and that was just brilliant, so off I go…
Author's Response: You are too kind! Thank you so much and I hope you enjoy revisiting terrace! <3
1 [Report This]Date: February 25, 2022 09:27 am Title: "That was what today was supposed to be. The loving union between people."
Oh my god it's happening. EVERYONE STAY F*CKING CALM.
"the way the tint of azure in her dress would change ever so slightly beneath the lights when she’d shift her body in another direction. That tiny sliver of magenta on the inside lining he could spot whenever she’d brought her cocktail to her lips. He couldn’t recall having ever seen her bare shoulders before, either. It felt weirdly illicit, like an unexpected gift." This is just... such a good visual and such a good glimpse into his smitten, Pam-broken mind.
"For just one precious moment it was like looking through a window that showed him what they could be like forever, if only one of them had the courage to reach out and open it." Who do you think you are. What gives you the right.
"however, he truly believed that, if nothing else, she deserved to know how much she was loved." This is such a beautiful sentiment and I think very Jim that even if his feelings weren't reciprocated, he'd want her to know she deserve and can do better than what she's getting from Roy.
"The third option is the worst of the three, and it’s unfortunately what he gets." Um. Ow? I really liked this chapter a lot for how well you captured Jim's feeling of being trapped and how much Pam's behavior feeds into this idea that she's something he's going to need to escape from now that he's back in Scranton.
This moment of Jim convincing himself he has to try to get over stings all that much worse with the beginning of the chapter in mind, knowing that even this little bit of hope he has for a better future at this moment isn't going to amount to much.
"Jim had taken a chance on them, on the possibility the two of them could be something amazing. And the most frustrating part of it all is that she knows they could be amazing. She knows exactly what it would be like to be with Jim because, in their own special way, they’ve actually been together for years." Yeah. Still hurts.
Ah, seeing Pam's POV on this and how close they are to a breakthrough and also how fundamentally out of touch they are in their interpretations of what's happening stings.
In general, this is just structured really well, and I'm happy it's out in the world.
Author's Response: You're the best, Joe. That is all.