10 [Report This]Date: January 16, 2010 05:54 pm Title: When it Rains, It Pours: Everybody Hurts
Wow, that was incredible. I really liked this chapter, and I can see how their love for each other is so clearly there. However, the one thing I think you could work on in your writing is the emotion. I think Pam probably would have been more depressed or in more pain, Jim might have been a little more distraught. All in all, I think this could have been a little more intense. And in other chapters I would advise you to bring on the emotion - whether it be good or bad. I DO think that you did a perfect job on the art show night, that was good with the anger.
Okay, so I liked this chapter a lot, and those are a few things to keep in mind, even though this story was written a while ago. Great chapter!
Date: June 12, 2007 08:33 pm Title: When it Rains, It Pours: Everybody Hurts
Why in the world would we throw rocks at you!? That chapter is wonderful...Jim did exactly what he was supposed to do.
Just to reassure you, I have been hospitalized several times in the past few years for all sorts of female issues...and every time my fiance brings me flowers, and being a boy he doesn't know what to say, but he doesn't have to say anything, I just need him.
awesome chapter...really.
8 [Report This]Date: June 12, 2007 05:41 pm Title: When it Rains, It Pours: Everybody Hurts
No rock throwing from me. What was that saying, into everyone's life some rain must fall? Although this was a sad chapter I can see this bringing them closer together.
“I got that call from the hospital this morning and I thought that you had died or something, I don’t even know,” he said. “I hadn’t been that concerned about someone in a real long time.” Sometimes you don't know what you've got until you think it's almost gone.
Date: June 12, 2007 02:31 pm Title: When it Rains, It Pours: Everybody Hurts
Like the great John Belushi said in Animal House "HOLY SHIT!" Whoa!! Major Whoa going on! so we all kinda saw Jim missing her show, but if he would've tried to re-schedual he wouldn't have his b%$#@ in a sling! I mean JESUS! you have got to stand up for yourself. You have go to show that snotty b!tch that she does not own you and cannot make such dictations about your life. It reallllllllly bugs me when someone does not stand up for themselves! I mean look at the situaion all over again. It's just like the job all over again....karen or PAM! There really is no choice there, but jim is good in this story about the groveling. He did make good on one of his promises!
But poor Pam! that was just terrible. When it rains it pours! SOOOOOO true! Sometimes this actually brings couples closer together or it tears them apart. By Jim showing up at the hospital and trying his damn-dist to try to make Pam feel as comfortable in the situation is amazing. I think though my favorite part had to be in the authors not....something about brighter roads lie ahead?!?!? lol yay!! we definetly need some happier times...maybe some good ol'e fluff!?!? Just simply amazing. Hopefully we'll see another post today?!?!? But bravo........
Bravo.
Date: June 12, 2007 01:10 pm Title: When it Rains, It Pours: Everybody Hurts
So I've been avoiding this fic becuase from the description I thought Pam was going to be married to Roy. But today I said "what the heck". Now, oh my god! This is so going on my favorites list. Keep it coming! :)
Author's Response: Haha! Thank you! Yes, the "Pam has a wedding" was to throw everyone off ;) I never actually said that she got married, teehee! I'm glad that you enjoy it!
Date: June 12, 2007 12:42 pm Title: When it Rains, It Pours: Everybody Hurts
So sad!!! But so good. Jim is such a sweetie. You write very well!!
Date: June 12, 2007 11:36 am Title: When it Rains, It Pours: Everybody Hurts
You most cetainly brought on the angst. Very well done. You handled the subject matter perfectly.
Date: June 12, 2007 11:36 am Title: When it Rains, It Pours: Everybody Hurts
I realize this chapter was kind of depressing, but I still liked it. And I would not throw rocks at you. I think in a weird way this has brought them closer together. And I also think that I should stop talking about fictional characters as if they're real people.
Date: June 12, 2007 11:19 am Title: When it Rains, It Pours: Everybody Hurts
If people threw anything, it wouldn't be rocks, it'd be garbage, because we are Office fans, after all ("Please don't throw garbage at me" - Pam).
But no garbage or rocks from me for this excellent chapter. I thought this was really excellent: “She had a miscarriage, Michael,” Jim replied, feeling a rather inexplicable rush of sadness course through him as he said the words. “And of course it was mine.”
It's very interesting how different Michael is - really caring that an 11:00 meeting was missed!
I liked the paragraph about Jim at Pam's apartment. (Maybe I should say "soon to be former apartment". Can I say that?)
Date: June 12, 2007 10:54 am Title: When it Rains, It Pours: Everybody Hurts
How devastating for the both of them. You did a very realistic take on it. Have we yet seen the worst of the angst? I hope so. I am looking forward to more.
Author's Response: Yes, you have seen the worst of the angst. :) Have no fear, calm, clear waters ahead.