Date: August 27, 2007 07:40 pm Title: Chapter 3
I'm really liking this, but it is really hard to read dialogue without quotation marks.
Date: August 27, 2007 06:31 pm Title: Chapter 1
I really like this. Your writing style is beautiful.
I'm still trying to adjust to the speaking without quotation marks thing though. :)
Author's Response: Thank's for the review! Experimenting with the whole quotation marks thing, thanks for the input. :)
Date: August 21, 2007 12:41 pm Title: Chapter 2
This is just lovely. Very subtle and understated and lovely. Can't wait for more
Author's Response: Keds, thanks for the review!
Date: August 21, 2007 03:57 am Title: Chapter 2
This is beautiful! This part made me sway:
Their fingers touch and butterfly wings rustle low, and she smiles because he always gives her the last won ton, and maybe her Jim really is back.
Looking forward to more!
Author's Response: Beeswax, thanks for the review!
Date: August 20, 2007 07:46 pm Title: Chapter 2
this is really great... I think the akwardness is very THEM!
Author's Response: big haircut, thanks for the review!
8 [Report This]Date: August 12, 2007 08:19 pm Title: Chapter 1
"Too late he had said again to Karen, when she wouldn’t look him in the eye on the way home, worried about what he was thinking. New York was still on and this changes nothing. But he knew he was already starting to lie. Because maybe, it wasn’t really too late." This is a great backstory to what probably happened between Beach Games and the Job. He surely would have had to downplay what Pam's confession really meant to him and also had to keep moving forward as if nothing had changed. I can't wait to read more!
10 [Report This]Date: August 12, 2007 06:51 am Title: Chapter 1
Very Nice.
Date: August 11, 2007 09:31 pm Title: Chapter 1
I really liked this!! I hope you're going to continue...I really want to see what happens next. I love the way you've written Jim and can't wait to see how you're going to write Pam!