Date: January 08, 2021 03:54 pm Title: Class 1
I've got to say, it's fascinating getting this perspective on what happens on paramedic calls and a glimpse into what daily life is like in that position. I feel like I learned a lot. Having it focus on someone being trained was useful, I think, because we're a lot closer to seeing it through Dan's eyes than Ethan.
The bit about giving the Stars of Life pin to kids to calm them during emergencies is probably going to stick with me.
The AED scene was very well written - you really felt the tension. And I appreciated the note about the differences between what Pam has seen on TV and what this is actually going to look like.
Author's Response: Thank you. It was fun putting this one in. How Ethan gets Dan involved is how I treat students when they ride with me. Ask them questions, encourage them to participate, all that. I don't really give out the Star of Life pins anymore, it just got to pricey to keep buying new ones, but it was a fun thing to do when I did.
I wanted to put that quick Pam POV in there to really highlight the difference between reality and TV. Glad it worked for you.
Date: January 01, 2021 02:46 pm Title: Shot to the Heart
Again, you’re giving us a really clear contrast in this chapter. Roy just is not all that eager to spend time with Pam, and Jim really, really does. Plus we get the teapot backstory, which is exciting!
I’m also putting us up to six near J-M misses here between the explicit reference to the kings of practical jokes and Jim telling the story of him meeting Morgan in just too little detail for Pam to get it.
There’s a lot of really successful humorous bits in this chapter. Dwight’s post-Dwayne prank meltdown and the Larissa’s birthday story. The image of them having cake and presents in the ER waiting room is a great visual.
I’m enjoying that you made the Princess Bride thing a runner leading up to The Fire. It adds some to that episode if that’s an unacknowledged in-joke.
I love Pam being comfortable enough with Jim to bring him on this trip to Marywood and reflect on her past. I’m noting some echoes of the first chapter here as Pam tells him about her college education blowing up – we keep seeing Pam repeating the mistake of giving things up for Roy instead of learning that it’s only burdening her life.
You’ve given Jim a remarkable amount of heart trouble in your writing, poor guy. This is a very tensely written sequence, and it’s powerful seeing it through Pam’s point of view.
Author's Response:
Pre-Casino Night Jim will take any excuse he can to be near Pam. And yes more with the Teapot. I think this is the first time anyone (including me) has actually counted the number of near-misses. I'm rather looking forward to seeing what the final number is. There will be more don't worry.
Princess Bride is one of the best movies ever made so it's a lot of fun to add that in here. Like I said about the first chapter, there's lot of things going on there. Glad you're picking up on a lot of them.
Yeah, Jim's heart gets a real wringing. I'm really looking forward to seeing what you think about the next two chapters.
Date: January 01, 2021 02:45 pm Title: Murals and Marriage
This is a fascinating chapter – you’ve got Roy throwing up some huge red flags here and then immediately offering up some understandable context that explains a lot of his maturity issues. (I’m going to be interested in seeing how much more you get into that going forward and in your Season 3 story.)
All the same, it still comes through really plainly that the wedding isn’t going to solve anything and these are two people with different visions and goals for their future. I’m wondering if we might see Pastor Dan lay that out a little more plainly for Pam.
Author's Response: I figured Roy needed a little humanizing as to why he acts the way he does. Not getting over the grief of his father's death seemed a good way to take things. You're right about Pastor Dan. He'll show up again though so don't worry to much.
Date: January 01, 2021 02:45 pm Title: The New Jamie
You can really see what a positive impact Jim has on Pam here again. This sort of support for her passions is clearly something she needs and is getting the exact opposite of from her belittling, sexist, immature fiancée. You make the contrast really clear here: she glows with Jim and shrinks with Roy.
You capture the sheer awfulness of Packer here quite effectively. The dialogue with him and Roy is on point, and I like how you used Packer to shed a light on the lesser awfulness of Roy, whether it’s not being able to understand that not wanting to visit her family is a problem (come on, man) or in their sex life. (It struck me that in some ways, with Roy it’s almost worse – Packer is disgusting, but Roy is treating a woman he is professing to care for the way Packer treats his one-night stands. Ugh.)
Her having him as her emergency contact is a lovely little sign of the growth in that relationship. And again, there’s a clear contrast with a Roy who doesn’t want to see her family and Jim who makes it possible, and in the process gives up something he wants by tipping her off to his progress with his driving lessons to put her needs first.
The backstory of the hot sauce was put together well – the touch of him immediately going to get her milk even as he’s amused by it is lovely.
So that’s near-misses #3 and #4 on the Jamie-Morgan story if I’m counting correctly.
Author's Response:
Packer is the worst and no one or nothing will convince me otherwise. Roy sideling up with him like that, yeah, Jim would know to get her out of there.
Once they're out of there, it was a ton of fun to write them being cute and playful again. Just the kind of thing she would need.
Date: January 01, 2021 02:44 pm Title: Mini-Golf
I like the idea of the driving lessons coming at the beginning of their relationship. I’d always envisioned it as coming along a little later, but it feels like it would really help solidify them as true best friends and not just work friends if they’ve established some non-work space for just each other early on.
In general, I’m just really enjoying this and getting the backstory for all these references from down the line – feels like a much more complete picture of the world we’re in.
Jim caring for her after the unfortunately timed golf ball incident is a sweet moment.
Author's Response:
I wanted to make sure we took the time to really dive into why Jim and Pam's friendship was so strong. Which would of course explain why the lower parts of their relationship hurt all the more. Because they were just so close. That and it was fun to come up with the backstory for the Teapot gifts.
Caring Jim is one of the best Jims.
Date: January 01, 2021 02:43 pm Title: The Zone
This was a really fun chapter. I love seeing all these elements that we (or the characters) are going to get to know well being introduced for the first time. Seeing the photo of young Jim and young Dwight get taken was probably my favorite, but knowing that Phyllis clocked Jim’s feelings for Pam from the beginning and Pam’s mom picking up on his effect on her from day one were both great too. You can also just really see how much better Pam’s life in the office is with Jim around – he’s helping her solve problems she had stopped acknowledging she had.
An interesting note popping up here with Pam romanticizing the idea of marrying her high school sweetheart. And wow – this was a hard blow for Jim at the end, especially with what a wonderful first impression Roy makes. Charming soul, that one.
Author's Response:
The shoe had to drop at some point. Still I'm glad you liked this one too. It was a lot of fun writing in all the backstory for some of the things that are only talked about for seconds on the show. Like the picture.
Date: January 01, 2021 02:43 pm Title: New Beginning
“I’m sure it’ll be like most other jobs. Get all the payroll and tax stuff filled out. A company that has as many branches as this one, with a corporate office in Manhattan, I’m sure will have some kind of new employee orientation process.” Oh, young Jim. There’s so much we need to warn you about. Tragically, we cannot.
I love the way you wrote the re-meeting here. Jim being blown away, Pam being willing to joke with him, Jim immediately doing a bit with her and her finding it entertaining, them both being immediately attracted/drawn to each other and finding each other a little familiar. You can see their future relationship beginning to take shape from the start.
Pam being the one to volunteer the Cugino’s lunch, even if it’s just her deciding to fill in for Michael, is a take on this I don’t think I’ve seen before. Feels like some of what’s going on in this chapter casts a different light on Jim falling for her so irrevocably – she seems for all the world like she’s interested and maybe even a little eager to explore what’s happening with them at a time his feelings are come into being.
Oh, Pam. Let’s be careful about mocking that house, okay. There will come a day you won’t be so eager to leave it either.
Pam’s hand-related pick-up techniques are *adorable.*
And I like the connection between her meeting Jim and Pam starting to sketch again – he’s brought a little light back into her life, a little energy and a little inspiration that she desperately needed.
Author's Response:
You picked up very much on what I was going for with this chapter. That even though they only met once before they hit it off then and now do again. It was a ton of fun to write this chapter. The pick-up techique always got a laugh even if it never got me any dates back in college.
1 [Report This]Date: January 01, 2021 02:42 pm Title: A Lot of Reasons
Wow. Yet another brutal chapter for Pam between¬ the lost sketch and a pregnancy scare. And does Roy ever handle this conversation horribly at just about every turn. His explanation for why she isn’t cheating is genuinely insulting. Both of his proposals suggest a guy who is not at all interested in what he’s suggesting they do. The ring does too. I guess I have some sympathy in the sense that he feels like he’s trying to do the right thing here, but wow. You can see his heart is not in this from the jump. Fortunately, help is on the way, Pam.
I appreciate you having Pastor Dan coming in with something I think Pam needs to hear – the wedding is a big day, but the marriage is what’s important, and they need to be thinking about that as they go through the planning process. I’ve always seen Pam as subconsciously assuming the wedding would somehow change things in the relationship despite all the evidence to the contrary, so it’s interesting for me to see this playing out in a context where she and Roy are going to have to address their expectations for what comes afterwards.
Author's Response:
Pre-first breakup Roy to me is a high schooler in a man's body. He never had to grow up more so he didn't. Thus he hasn't learned what a mature relationship is supposed to be like. Part of that could be of course because his Dad died, but that's my reasoning for a lot of his behavior.
Good insight on Pam there about the wedding.
1 [Report This]Date: December 31, 2020 07:14 pm Title: Looking Ahead
I appreciate you building out the concept behind Athlead/Athleap here, and in particular the way you’ve given some context for the kind-of-out-of-nowhere appearance of what was apparently supposed to be Jim’s dream all along – it casts a different, more favorable (and better-written) light on his jarring leap into this if the idea was always “we’re gonna do this 10 years down the line.”
Jim’s interview with Michael was fun to read. I love that he was already making Chili’s where business happens, and Jim’s natural instinct for handling him being there right at the start.
I’m glad you gave us a sense of what a Jim relationship looks like pre-Pam – probably a decent boyfriend and someone who Jess looks backs on fondly, but on a fundamental level really not capital-C Committed. (Also, it gave us Jim telling Larissa she was easier to talk to about this stuff before she went into psych, which is too real.)
Author's Response:
I remember this chapter as being a ton of fun to write. To give Jim some more backstory with Athlead/Athleap and how his previous relationships might have been as well. I don't think either Jim or Jess were capital-C committed to that relationship. Thanks in part to a nice heart to heart with Larissa.
The interview with Michael remains one of the most fun things I've ever written. Glad you liked it.
1 [Report This]Date: December 31, 2020 07:13 pm Title: Fractured
God. I feel terrible for the Andersons, but honestly, what did Pam do to deserve this? She tries to stand up for herself maybe ONE TIME and immediately gets the worst possible outcome. Followed by a pretty horrific experience losing her virginity. And it ends up costing her her college experience and gets her stuck at Dunder Mifflin. That’s definitely an experience that’s going to leave a mark on your psyche.
Author's Response: I was going for crazy hurting and mixed up with everything here. It stings true and it will leave a mark for sure. In more ways that one.
1 [Report This]Date: December 31, 2020 07:13 pm Title: Nights to Remember
This was more 90s nostalgia trip than horrible 90s flashback, but still – this tale of how Jamie and Morgan never end up connecting again is painfully plausible in pre-social media times.
Kenny is just… the worst. I’m looking forward to seeing the backstory play out with Roy’s family here. And I’m glad to see a slightly more positive take on Roy. I do think he really *has* to be decent at some point in their relationship for it to make sense that Pam keeps him around so long.
Author's Response: I had to come up with some reason as to why Jamie and Morgan couldn't re-connect and that seemed to fit the bill. Yeah Roy may have his redeeming moments. Not so with Kenny and I'll die on that mountain.
1 [Report This]Date: December 31, 2020 07:13 pm Title: First Meeting
A really interesting start to this one! You start with something like an anti-meet cute – she can’t see, they get stink bombed, and he immediately has to run. It’s almost more of a missed opportunity than it is a prior meeting. And then we go right into her first date with Roy – and I really enjoy that this ended up being jinx-related. (Though the fact that Roy enjoys a Pam who can’t speak for herself just feels… troublingly accurate.)
I’m interested to see how you’ll explore the theme being introduced here – that you learn from your mistakes or you repeat them. Certainly it’s something you can pretty cleanly apply to canon in all sorts of ways.
This chapter gave me all sorts of horrible 90s flashbacks, down to the chatroom… where all of a sudden you turn an anti-meet cute into a regular meet-cute! A really nice touch.
Author's Response: Well hello new reviews to this story! Glad you liked how things got set up. I hope you were paying attention to this chapter. There's lots of things that will come back around, and in that regard I'm pretty proud of it. Sorry not sorry about the 90's flashbacks. I remember the 90's as being a great time. Looking forward to what you think going forward.
1 [Report This]Date: March 19, 2019 08:57 pm Title: Epilogue
What a wonderful ride this story has been! I looked forward to every chapter and selfishly I waited a few days to read the epilogue once I saw it posted...just because I wasn’t ready for it to end.
From one medic to another- it was refreshing to see medical aspects added to a story that were accurate! Haha. Nice to see my two loves-the office and paramedicine- combined in a believable way. Totally enjoyed every part of this and I hope to see more adventures of Jamie and Morgan!
Author's Response: Another Medic around these parts?! Holy crap! Why didn't you tell me sooner? Ah well. Actually I realized something a while back about the cardiac arrest chapters. They're based on 2010-2015 AHA guidelines, however at that point in the story it's what 2006? So Vasopressin should have been there for the first and/or second round of Epi. Ah well, I'll take off my medic nerd glasses now.
I'm very glad you enjoyed this story. It was a lot of fun to put it all together. Please feel free add more feedback to future writings as well. I always value what readers have to say. Thanks again.
Date: March 17, 2019 07:47 pm Title: Epilogue
I'm not shy about saying that Niagara is my favorite episode of the series, but I'm always a little disappointed that we don't get to see any of the reception. It's always nice to see how others think that reception might have gone... This is no exception.
This is a cute and satisfying ending that wraps up the last loose thread of an amazingly detailed and intricate story! You pulled off a story of epic proportions and didn't lose sight of the characters at the heart of it. Great job!
Author's Response: Thank you so very much for this and every other review you've written here. As well as comments during chats that have helped shape this story. It wouldn't have been the same without your input. I'm very glad you've enjoyed it so much. It was a fun story to bring to life and I'm very glad others enjoyed it too. I'm a little sad to not be working on it anymore, but there are other stories to write as well. Again, thank you so very much.
Date: March 17, 2019 07:36 pm Title: The Hunt
Lord knows I love a good scavenger hunt! Good job, Pam!
What a lovely and fun look back through their history, from present and going back and I'm sure there are a million little bits I could point out that are adorable and cute, but here's the thing Warrior -- all I can think about is the fact that Jim is doing wind sprints. He's doing wind sprints instead of trying to get to Pam. Oh Jim.
I mean, you nailed it, Warrior. There was a lot of build up to this chapter, and it's everything it should and needed to be!
Author's Response: To be fair, he didn't know where to meet Pam while he was running those wind sprints. And he only had to run 5 this time rather than all the ones he did back in high school.
Thanks. It was a ton of fun to have this trip down memory lane. My first thought was to have all the notes Pam wrote him to be in poetry, but your comment in a chat awhile back when I floated the idea as well as my feeling that it would hard to come up with poems for everything nixed that.
I'm very glad you liked how this chapter turned out.
Date: March 17, 2019 06:53 pm Title: Memorial Day and Beyond
Aww, look at Pam sucking up to Jim's parents. I see you and your whiskey lessons, Warrior.
Good to see Betsy how I like my Betsys... cheerful and lovely and not hating Pam for all of the drama that really, her own son was responsible for, but still, I get why Pam felt the needed to play nice and I'm glad it worked in her favor.
We're finally here! The reveal is about to happen and... I definitely didn't see this coming! To be fair, I don't remember the conversations from the first chapter, so I had to go back because I didn't get where we were going with this whole stink bomb thing. Good to see Pete and Tom are sticking with classic pranks, even all these years later! Makes me feel better about slamming my cousins' hands into butter every thanksgiving for 8 years running now.
I like that Pam is the one figuring it out and I love that she's confiding everything to Larissa for confirmation.
Oh Beesly, what are you planning??
Author's Response: Three fold reason for the whiskey lesson. One, write what you know and writing is easier. Two, because way back in the Mini-Golf chapter I'd written that Ger-Bear was big into whiskey and it gave me to chance to explore that. Three, the lesson primed Pam's mind to have smell trigger memory as happened with the stink bomb.
Thanks about the critique about Betsy. I've usually always seen her pictured as a warm woman and saw no reason to change that.
Glad I could keep the suspense up with the first reveal. I'd had the image of Pam kneeling on the floor going through the box since I started writing this story and it was fun to finally bring that out. If I recall a review of yours a while back, you were saying you'd like it if the sisters had a role in the reveal. I'd already been planning on Larissa being a part of that, but it's fun when things line up like this.
As for what Pam has in mind? Well I'm sure you'll find out soon, but it's a lot of fun.
Date: March 17, 2019 06:37 pm Title: Clearing the Air
Full confession: I am like, one of maybe 7 people in the world who turns the station every single time Africa comes on. Oh Pam, I was fully on your side in this story until that song choice. ;)
I like that we're skipping past the first date and going right into the good stuff. And I very much love that Pam's the one being all, "nah, we're not done with tonight yet, I'm coming over." BUT.
WARRIOR.
MAN.
The idea that Jim didn't sleep with Karen OR Katy?? Bold move, Warrior. Bold, bold move. As much as I loathe Karen, I'm not sure she's the type that would have moved states/stuck around a dead-end town for a guy she hadn't gotten past first base with. I'm very curious as to your reasoning for this!
This is quite the showdown between Karen and Jim (especially if they aren't banging! lol, I'm sorry, I'm kidding) but like, good to see Jim bounce back here a little and get his balls back and stand up for the woman he loves. That's what we like to see!
Good discussions between them, getting everything out into the open so they can move forward with clean slates. Hopefully Jim learned his lesson and stays away from paper shredders from now on.
OOoh, time to meet the parents! This should be great!
Author's Response: Hopefully Pam's reasoning for liking the song was reason to include it. I had to get at least one more "almost finding out moment," in there. The whole Jim and Karen not sleeping together thing was another one of those Season 3 things I'd thought about, but it got edited out to move onto more important issues for this story. Again it's one of those things I might go back and re-visit sometime later. Another reason was my wanting my story to be a little more unique than most other stories I've read here. Same thing as to why Jim goes off on Karen rather than the other way around.
Jim and Pam having those discussions are my way of making sure they're ready for other big things that might be coming in their relationship.;) But yes Jim has learned his lesson about paper shredders.
Date: March 17, 2019 06:14 pm Title: Refining Fire
Ooh, big time jump! There is a lot going on here. It's interesting to think about what happened immediately after Dwight pepper-sprayed Roy and it makes sense that the police and an ambulance would have been called to the scene. And that Roy would be an ass through the whole thing.
Nice little bit with Ethan putting Dwight in his place, though. That made me laugh.
Excellent synopsis and intuitive look at Pam during the coal walk. I gotta say, I'm liking Pam's growth here.
And now we're to "It's a date!"... at least I have a pretty good idea where we're going from here!
Author's Response: There were more ideas I had for stuff in Season 3, but I kept thinking, "I've already been dragging this whole Jim and Pam don't know they're Jamie and Morgan," thing on long enough so that meant a big time jump to more important things in the story. I might still write some of those other Season 3 ideas as one shots though.
Always fun when Dwight it put in his place like that. Dwight is mostly bluster and doesn't really stand a chance against people who actually know what they're talking about.
Pam's growth was always a lot of fun. Yes we see her grow in the show, but there had to have been more off camera to help it along which was fun to explore.
Date: March 17, 2019 05:49 pm Title: Visitors
It's not often that I prefer the Beesly family to the Halperts but I gotta say.. I'm not their biggest fan this chapter! I don't know, man, if my family stormed into my place uninvited and started to unpack my things and dump my booze, I'd kick them out.
This is a rough chapter to feel for Jim too...like, he made these choices - the choice to leave, the choice not to go to Australia, the choice to start a new job -- suck it up, buttercup!
...Which is why I kind of laughed when he shredded her letter -- that's just another choice you're gonna have to deal with, buddy.
Now let's go see what Jim can do to get back on track and become the guy we all know and love again. Here's hoping he doesn't let me, or Pam, down.
Author's Response: Yeah I was going for tough love on the part of the Halpert's here. And the whole suck it up buttercup is kind of what his Dad and Johnathan are telling him. Yeah, I'd be angry if my booze got dumped, but again sometimes when you love someone you need to save them from themselves. Better a few bottles get dumped now, than a much more destructive cycle start up.
Date: March 17, 2019 05:37 pm Title: Choosing to Move
Wait, so Pam found an apartment and packed up her things before even telling Roy that she was calling off the wedding? Interesting take! I wonder what Roy was thinking for those 2 weeks while she was at Penny's and not home.
It's funny to me that even just a few years ago, when this chapter was taking place - the preferred method is sending a letter vs. email. I'm sure that *nothing* will go wrong with this plan! Right? Right?
And I hate to break it to you, but Beauty and the Beast beats The Lion King in every way possible. :)
Author's Response: What was Roy thinking? Probably something along the lines of, "Glad she's not bugging me with any of this wedding stuff. What game is on tonight?" I was trying to do a couple different things with this story than I've seen in many other places. Thus having Pam be set to move out like this before she actually takes off her ring and gives it back to Roy.
Could Pam have sent an email? Sure, but that's a lot less personal.
And while I appreciate the fact that Belle told Gaston to go kick rocks, there's no way a chick with Stockholm Syndrome beats a retelling of classic Shakespeare set on the African Savannah while Elton John music plays in the background.
Date: March 14, 2019 07:54 pm Title: Epilogue
Such a nice ending for a wonderful trip. It is, indeed, a great project and you've given us a wonderful take on the story. Congratulations on finishing it and thanks a lot for sharing!
Author's Response: Thank you. It's been a lot of fun to bring this story to life. Glad you liked the ending.
Date: March 14, 2019 08:50 am Title: Epilogue
This was, as every chapter has been, excellent. I particularly love your taking the high school sweetheart thing that's usually Pam and Roy and turning it around here. Short, sweet, and a great epilogue to a great story.
Author's Response: Thank you. It was fun to wrap things up and I'm glad you liked it. Thank you for all your great feedback for this story. It's very appreciated.
Date: March 05, 2019 07:33 pm Title: First Meeting
What a fun chapter! And the Big Reveal has finally happened! So fun! And I recognized almost all of the songs. Now I'm sad that it will wrap up soon. Congrats Warrior on being #2. This HAS been a real marathon, full of so many great stories. Thank you so much! Looking forward to the finale. So great! :)
Author's Response: Thank you. It was a lot of fun to write and create all these things for Jim to find. Thank you for all the great feedback as well.
Date: March 05, 2019 12:41 pm Title: The Hunt
So.... left the review in the wrong chapter. Sorry! I'll take the chance to add that I'm sorry this story is going to end. But I totally get it. It reached it's conclussion.
Author's Response: All good things. But we still have one more time to see what's going on with them. Also I'll still probably write stories in this universe as well. So we'll still see Jamie and Morgan around.
Date: March 05, 2019 12:40 pm Title: First Meeting
Wow! First of all, I couldn't belive the word count. Kudos on that! It takes a lot of commitment.
I really liked the premise of the chapter, to send Jim on a scavenger hunt. Just the thing he would enjoy and such a nice way for Pam to say what she knows.
The songs are a very nice touch to every part of the journey.
Author's Response: Thanks. Time and words fly when you're having fun. Sending Jim on the scavenger hunt was something I'd been planning for a long time. I'm glad it turned out well. I've had all those songs on a Youtube playlist for months. It's been the main thing I've listened to while I was writing this story so I'm glad all the songs came across well.