Date: February 15, 2021 02:27 am Title: I'll Never Let You Sweep Me Off My Feet
I’m just here on like my 8th or 9th reread (hell, I lost track honestly) and I just wanted to document that this will forever and always be one of my favorite lines in all of fanfic, and that’s saying something:
““Did you mean it?” He could be asking in reference to a million things but she’s pretty sure right now he’s only thinking about one thing and she laughs fully because it’s comforting to know that no matter how much she loves him and how perfect her fantasy of him is, at base, he’s still very much a man just like every other man.“
God, Coley this is such a damn classic. Please never, ever stop providing the universe with such immeasurable talent.
Date: July 31, 2020 10:03 pm Title: Un-Break Broken
Okay leaving a proper review after my reread. Again, this is one of like two stories I’ve ever read that makes me attracted to Ryan Howard. And then also like, just end my damn life with the second chapter WHY DON’T YOU. You are SO talented and this is SO good and now I’m gonna go make sure I’ve 100% read and reviewed your entire body of word because goddamn
Date: March 12, 2019 06:54 pm Title: I'll Never Let You Sweep Me Off My Feet
Holy crap. Ok I might have to come back and properly review because I think all of my brain cells are on fire right now. That was amazing. Yep. I think that’s all I can convey right now. Gahhhhh, the anger and angst and heat are just...my jam and this was everything and more.
Aw, thank you so much!! I mean, I’m sorry for the whole setting some brain cells on fire, but also, I’m not really that sorry. *shrugs*
Thanks again for taking the time to read and comment!
Date: March 12, 2019 06:47 pm Title: Un-Break Broken
You may not look at this story again, but hopefully you're still keeping an eye on review counts, yes? Yes. Good.
So yeah, that's one helluva chapter there. Going to get this out of the way right now, was the "refused to be called Jamie," line intended to be a shoutout for yours truly? If so, d'awww thank you. Great way to use that name, but in your own way rather than how I've used it. If it's not a shoutout, no worries. Same compliment still applies though.
There's just so much to unpack here. It does flow in a way that makes sense though. After everything from last chapter it's easy to see that Pam could have lost sight of herself a little there. Then when JD shows up her facade as Ella is her first step back from being lost. Acknowledging their real names on the roof being the next step there. That Jim is the one to say he can't is a great choice. Casino Night was a huge hit and I think it makes sense that Jim is still reeling from not only Casino Night, but all their other adventures written here.
The quick fast-forward through Season 3 and into Season 4 worked well too I thought. It was a hard time in their lives, they made their peace with it and have progressed in their relationship. However it was very fun to have that last flirty IM conversation. Even though there were still huge emotions, they can still remember they had a very enjoyable experience and why not re-create some of that. Well done in that regard.
Great writing as always.
Thanks for this! I love that you picked up on Jim saying “I can’t” because that felt like a pretty pivotal moment for me in this whole thing.
As for the Jamie call-out... ;)
As always, thank you for reading!
Date: March 10, 2019 06:50 pm Title: Un-Break Broken
OMG! This is one of the best, hottest, most memorable chapters ever!
"...in her current state of being, she will not and cannot think about making love to Jim."
The texts after their night in the bar - perfect. The...um...oral experiences...amazing. :-)
The last night on the roof, when they inch so close to each other, and yet still so far.
As I re-read it today, the thought struck me that this story is all Pam. Jim is part of it, but we don't see any of his point of view. The bits we do see are true to character, but we don't see much. In this case I like that. This is all about Pam figuring herself out. Who she is, what she wants. She never had the opportunity to be young and single, and she took it. She even got to include Jim in that experience, even if it's bittersweet.
This was really, really amazing. Thank you for chapter two.
Author's Response: Yes! This is very intentionally a “Pam works through some things on her own” story and I’m so happy that it comes across that way!
Date: March 10, 2019 06:43 pm Title: I'll Never Let You Sweep Me Off My Feet
I've been waiting all weekend to review until I had time to do this justice. What an amazing story in two chapters! I've re-read at least twice and been thinking about it all weekend.
Pam tries to joke around with Ryan like she did with Jim, but he's not the same, so she just goes with what he can offer. It's almost as if he treats her the way she thinks she deserves, as if she deserves to be punished. It's always sad when she gets together with Ryan in fanfic because it's never quite right, but the way you write it made it really hot too.
I like how "after 5 Pam" is actually closer to the real Pam than daytime Pam. Your descriptions make it absolutely crystal clear, as if I'd seen a movie of your story.
I could go on. :-)
Author's Response: Thank you so much! This is the sweetest and I’m so happy you took the time to read and review! I love your assessment of the Pam and Ryan dynamic.
Date: March 09, 2019 11:30 am Title: I'll Never Let You Sweep Me Off My Feet
I love everything this fic chooses to be and don't really know where to start but here we go! I too am totally here for Pam having a wild summer post broken engagement. Love the detail of her "going out with Isabel persona" being totally different from her "going out with Kelly" persona (also memo to all JAM writers: moar Isabel in fics plz thx).
Love the bit where everyone is trying to make Roy's DUI Pam's problem, I can totally envision it and I'm proud of your Pam for refusing to take it on.
I am NOT a fan of Pam/Ryan in any romantic sense but I do love their antagonistic frenemy dynamic and you write that amazingly. Your Ryan is perfect, I like how you never have Ryan softened by Pam's humor and charm, he just remains an a-hole who pretty much treats his interactions with Pam as game that he's at once annoyed and amused by. (That line where Pam asks if he's 70 because he likes mint lifesavers cracked me up so much, so perfect). IF I have to imagine Pam and Ryan hooking up, I think it would have to be like you write it, no underlying feelings, not even a real attraction, they're mostly just trying to one-up each other. That Body Shot passage, damn! You are a writer, Coley!
Not even going to lie, the lifesavers bit and the Roy thing are two of my favorite moments in this so I’m glad you enjoyed them as well!
Thank you so much for reading and taking the time to comment! 😊 I definitely appreciate it.
Date: March 08, 2019 05:52 pm Title: Un-Break Broken
Wow... just wow. I'm never ever ever ever questioning your motives again.
This felt like a rollercoaster and yeah... just found out I love that. Great lemon, acid sense of humor, Pam being the best Pam possible and Jim... well, he can keep up and that's good.
And I loved that you didn't finished ít after the rooftop, but fixed this into canon making it all weirder and better.
Thanks a lot for sharing it!
Author's Response: I love this and the idea of it being a bit of an emotional rollercoaster, but I’m glad you stuck with it and hopefully I never give you reason to doubt me ever again! Thanks for taking the time to read this one 😊
Date: March 08, 2019 04:47 pm Title: I'll Never Let You Sweep Me Off My Feet
Ok, I finally read it and it's GOOD. I'm still grossed out by Ryan and always will be, but in this scenario that really works. Plus, I always imagined Pam making all sorts of things with her newly acquired freedom once she breaks up with Roy. So... great!
Author's Response: Thanks Kuri! I know that the whole Ryan thing is hit or miss and that we all have Very Strong Opinions on it so I’m glad you kept reading!
Date: March 08, 2019 07:09 am Title: Un-Break Broken
Oh man, I have to admit halfway through this I was hoping you were going more AU but by the end I was very happy with where you ended up. It's a fitting counterpoint to your 1st chapter. Nice work, and I'm glad you got it posted.
Also "and he refused to be called Jamie"? I see what you did there. Paging warrior4...
Hahahaha way to call me right out! I kid, I kid. Just making sure there’s a distinct difference between JD and Jamie...
Thanks for sticking with this! I know it’s not your typical read, so I definitely appreciate it!
Date: March 07, 2019 10:38 pm Title: Un-Break Broken
To begin, apologize for NOTHING. Nothing. You write Broken Pam beautifully and I love this.
Also, there are too many wonderful references here. You know that right? Grey's, Friends,Celibacy Hall Pass, Phillies T-shirts that coordinate with lipstick, craft beer. You know all of these little details make it magic, yes?
"This is it. This is how she dies." I mean, yes for Pam, but also yes for me when I read about Jim in DARK JEANS and NIKES and now all of my fave people are in a TSwift song so, yeah, thanks.
"Ten years with Roy finally pays off." Nope, that one was actually how I died.
But also, let's take a moment of Silence for Flirty Jim, not acting like the platonic BFF he was cast into. That ass-appreciation builds a girl's confidence. Good job, Jimothy!
But then there's this perfect, perfect angry-fuck in the BWW bathroom and I have Feelings because that pedestal bit? That is part of Pam's Wild Summer and what she's proving to herself (and maybe everybody else, even in Jim's absence) and then he leaves. He Leaves. he leaves. What the actual fuck is up with him leaving? Again. I'm fine. It's fine.
But then there's Kitchen Things and she's telling him to leave and that's So Complicated and she's looking at his desk and I don't think I'm fine after all. Because every bit of that at Isabel's gutted me in All Kinds of Ways.
"He snorts but his tone is anything but malicious when he says no and it makes her heart ache all over again because even though it’s just one syllable it sounds like Flonkerton and staplers in Jello and the end of a game of Jinx all rolled into one." 2019 Dundie for most intense/nostalgic/gut-wrenching sentence in a fic. I'm not crying over these fake people... Nope, not me.
So...I've read that rooftop scene 942 times and I can't review it because it's All So Perfect. Like, I get so consumed in every sentence and the feelings it evokes that I just can't. Then they say Drive Safe/Be Good and I want to yell at both of them. Yes, these fictional characters, that's who I want to yell at.
I did not expect this to go canon, especially so season 3 canon, but I really love it. That whole argument, he leaves and comes back and clean slates. Oh my, that's such rich backstory and I want more of it. I can't lie.
And that ending! So perfect.
I mean, clearly, I write a dissertation on my reviews of this amazing story so I love it. But you do this amazing job with their dialogue and banter, even when they are in pain. Thank you for this gem. It is absolutely one of my all-time favorites.
Author's Response: I mean. I can’t even say anything here. I’m just so happy you loved it, seeing as how its your birthday story and all. I also really love that you picked up on the “10 years with Roy” line and well, every other minor detail/Easter egg/hidden gem you found. Because you found them all. a86;a039;
Date: February 10, 2019 08:14 pm Title: I'll Never Let You Sweep Me Off My Feet
Hi. Hey, me again. I want to make a slight amendment/addition to my initial dissertation on this chapter.
The RuBbErBaNdS were from Jim's desk. Read everything AG pointed out about that and hi I want to die a little bit.
Also, I know, I KNOW, this comes from so many conversations about Ryan, but I love how you've really made it a story about Pam. Cause that's what it is.
Have I mentioned I can't wait for that next chapter???
I Very Much appreciate that both of you picked up on that because it’s one of my favorite small parts of this chapter. :)
Annnnnd, I figured I could tell this as Pam’s story so as to leave the door open for anyone who might have an idea or five for Ryan’s side. Weird, I know.
Date: February 08, 2019 05:27 pm Title: I'll Never Let You Sweep Me Off My Feet
“Stop emailing me. Seriously.”
God, I love that Ryan is just an asshole. And that she gives it right back and puts him in his place this whole time.
Uhh, the fact that she stole the rubber bands from Jim’s desk KILLS me. Omg. So much to assume from that. The pain comes from something that was once his, but it’s the pain that’s supposed to snap her out of thinking about him in the first place UGH
I also love that she tests out Ryan’s last name and hates it, like there isn’t a pattern, and it *does* only work for Jim.
The fact that there are not one but TWO different versions of YouDoYouGirl Pam is amazing. Kelly would totally make her dress up like a Willy Wonka character and drink fruity drinks.
Three letter names. That’s a kink. Ugh. Poor Pam. She’s really got it bad.
“Like two people who probably have their shit together,” because she doesn’t, and she’s totally putting on masks and UGH I love it. I mean, I don’t love that she’s sad. I just love symbolism. I’m a nerd. Thanks for feeding that.
The fact that she’s ordering more alcohol at even the PROSPECT of getting over Jim breaks my heart. Like she wants to but she doesn’t and she’s just tired of thinking about it. Poor baby.
“Is it a real question or is it like the time you asked me why school busses don’t have seat belts.”
HA HAH AAHAHAH HAHHAH I LOVE THIS. IM STILL LAUGHING. Because like. Jim would’ve taken that bait. Ugh. Ryan.
It’s interesting to me that Kelly has a “Ryan at work” kink, but like, it’s totally plausible. It would explain why they’re so on and off all the time.
“Because the cheerleaders can’t always win” YOU GET EM MILA, GO GIRL, ASSERT YOURSELF!
“She isn’t the only one distracting herself this summer.”
Damn why is the whole of Dunder Mifflin depressed?
Honestly, I’m so excited for this. Not because I want to see Pam sleep around, but because you can just *tell* that she’s broken and doesn’t know what to do. All of this pretending and ducking and the falsities; she’s out of her element, but really she’s still the same, timid Pam beneath that all. And you’re showing that SO well.
Bring on...! well...honestly, anyone but Ryan. Maybe tattoo guy?
The schoolbus question is an important one and I’ve never gotten an answer to it that satisfies me.
I’ve explained the next chapter elsewhere as “3/4 finished being written and 4/4 gutter trash fever dream” so like, It’s being broughten. ;)
Date: February 08, 2019 03:50 pm Title: I'll Never Let You Sweep Me Off My Feet
My first comment is going to be that DCs comment is longer than your entire chapter. I’ll be thoroughly honest in that I read this during my lunch at work so I’m going to reread and then comment appropriately.
Date: February 08, 2019 07:02 am Title: I'll Never Let You Sweep Me Off My Feet
Coley, the only reason I finished this chapter is because I love how you write. Because I hate Ryan/Pam with an deep passion that wells somewhere from the bottom of my soul. You do a good job of expressing angst and of expressing Ryan's who-cares attitude, though.
Author's Response: Aw, thanks for toughing it out, Comfect! I appreciate it! Everything will be okay in the end, I promise. ;)
Date: February 08, 2019 06:01 am Title: I'll Never Let You Sweep Me Off My Feet
Yeah, Pam does kind of let herself go here a bit. Gotta say her doing anything like that with Ryan always makes me feel kind of, ugh. Usually it's because Ryan is just such a creep and a jerk and also my hardcore love of all things JAM. It's understandable that Pam would go through something like this. Considering everything that happened after Casino Night. Doesn't mean I have to particularly like this part of her life.
That being said, you did a great job writing it all. Very clear and detailed.
Author's Response: I mean, better Ryan than a total stranger, right? Right? Lol, hang in there... it’ll be okay. Promise.
Date: February 07, 2019 11:28 pm Title: I'll Never Let You Sweep Me Off My Feet
THIS is absolutely Pam's Wild Summer and she deserves it and I am HERE for it.
I love how everything at the beginning is about Pam evolving and how she is (not) trying to move past Jim. Ryan just happens to get in the way and exist. And, god, I love that he is an ass to her even here. Not only because it's so in-character (YOU CAN WRITE RYAN!!) but she kind of needs that (to not be adored).
That parallel between Nights with Isabel and Nights with Kelly is 100% on point and absolute perfection.
Side note: Pam's name obsession alongside her current, understandable and completely normal identity crisis is a fantastically quirky gift and I pray you never stop giving them.
Old-fashioneds and high school English teachers and Semi-Charmed Fucking Life! I am so exposed and I love it.
"She doesn't hate it. She doesn't exactly love it, but she definitely doesn't hate it." -Pam's Summertime Mantra
Asking Ryan if he's 70 and she knows herself enough (and is a good enough person) to not pursue Benjamin and dragging Ryan into the supply closet are ALL SO PAM.
"She'll be damned if something doesn't spark" might be my favorite line/literal technique in this whole damn story.
God and if there isn't something so real about the fact that they Know they don't like each other and they're perfectly satisfied playing these games with each other. "they both know it [ugh, Katy] has nothing to do with him and everything to do with the one who moved away" I'm fine. I'm fine.
The Katy part pissed me off and made me laugh. "The cheerleaders can't always win" I'm cracking up over Pam's satisfaction at that moment.
That shot scene blew my mind. I was not expecting it. You wrote it with this perfect sexiness of the mechanics and teasing familiarity but not an intimacy of two people who care deeply. In other words, it was Perfectly Written for these two dum dums. God, that wink was a nice touch. But I also don't think Pam is quite as bored as she lets on. ;)
Hi, amazing moment where Ryan can't handle tequila shots so he does lemon drops. Now back to our regularly scheduled programming.
She left to go to Danny Cordray and clearly did Something to momentarily not think she was such a dork and hi I'm dead.
That Roy situation was too real and the perfect setup for this scene. But can we talk about how Pam still thinks about Kelly AND Jim in the car and it's a little heartbreaking and desperate and oh so Pam?
UUUUUUGGGGGHHHH, I was NOT expecting that part with them in the backseat, but it is so good. You wrote them perfectly in character and that moment where she realizes she's not the only one look for a distraction just makes this all the more perfect.
Hey, do you think I at all like this story and am interested in it and what happens? Hm?
You know that this is all your fault, so yay! Happy Birthday!
I’m just really happy you understand how hilarious the idea of Ryan doing lemon drops is. You get me.