Reviews For Another First Date
You must login (register) to review or leave jellybeans
Reviewer: grc73 Signed [Report This]
Date: December 06, 2021 03:13 am Title: The Alien

GREAT chapter, Max!

I remember the days of morning sickness, fun, fun, fun. As ever, nailed it. This was so entertaining, and look at you with the hint of the steam - I'm shocked, SHOCKED I tell you! ;)

Such a great story and you know that Beth needs another follow-up story when this is done!

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed [Report This]
Date: December 05, 2021 03:49 pm Title: The Alien

"Glancing first at the clock on the bedside table, she was still unable to make out anything but a neon green blur, but long since had figured out which amorphous shape was a five, versus a six and even a seven. The eights still gave her a bit of trouble." TOO REAL.

"Never in her life had she laughed while simultaneously vomiting, but as she leaned over the bowl she realized there was a first time for everything." TOO CUTE.

I mean, really, this is literally too much fluff to handle. Jim adjusting to what she really needs as opposed to what he thinks his role is during her bouts with morning sickness is terrific, and him being the kind of dad who *immediately* starts talking to the baby constantly is very Jim. And you're mining a lot out of the real unpleasantness of early pregnancy here.

"Jim, in solidarity threw out his cereal and ate only the fruit’s other half, until later when she showered and he scarfed down a bowl out of her sight." I support both halves of this plan entirely.

“Mmm, hearing you say greasy, fried, pig fat, is such a turn on.” Ngl, your tip-toeing into steam is pretty terrific. And their early morning routine is adorable.

“Did I just hear you call our baby’s mother a nympho?” Truth hurts, Beesly. And Pam's imitation of the baby is ADORBS.

Beth is a clever devil here. And I'm glad they told her - Pam could use some perspective from someone other than the melting-down S5/6 Helene at this juncture. She might be outspoken, but I love her speech here... and it feels like it echoes a lot in their dialogue in The Delivery.

YIDDISH SIGHTING.

Reviewer: warrior4 Signed [Report This]
Date: December 04, 2021 06:18 pm Title: The Alien

Lots of fun with this one. Pam and Jim enjoying a plethora of morning activities was great fun to read. Good job Jim doing your best to help her find something she will tolerate for breakfast. Their banter throughout everything was a delight to read as well.

So Beth got to be the first one to hear the news? That's sweet. So was her reaction to everything. Nice that they're exchanging info. Feels like their relationship has earned the right at this point. They are friends, not just favorite customers/favorite waitress. Nice to see that. Lovely job as always.

Reviewer: grc73 Signed [Report This]
Date: October 14, 2021 08:17 am Title: Dry Spell

An absolutely cracking chapter, Lady! Very engrossing and yet another satisfying read! I loved the link to 360T as well.

Author's Response:

Hey Lady,

Glad you were satisfied. TWWS 

I aim to please. 

You caught that nod. Couldn't help myself. I'M kinda immersed in time travel right now as you know.

Thanks for popping in to review. Catch you in another timeline. 

 

Reviewer: Once Signed [Report This]
Date: October 12, 2021 08:54 pm Title: Dry Spell

Sorry I'm late on this review. Whenever I read a reference to Jim's nose, I get the giggles and have to go to Offsite Recommendations and reread Primae Noctis where the phrase "potato nose" was coined. That's my story, and I'm stickin' to it.

Jam turning to jelly is in the same league.

Good onya

Author's Response:

I love how you always wind up on a tangent when reading...in a good way. As I respond I am looking at my Jim funco pop and I don't quite think they got the nose in the right proportion.

Anyway so glad you enjoyed and got the giggles - I did myself when writing - in particular the jelly line.

Thanks for the review- they are like my aphrodisiac - well I guess more like my post-coital smoke (or since I don't my smoke, cuddle - and now I'm off to read It had to Be You  -the Harry Met Sally related AU)

Cheers! 

 

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed [Report This]
Date: October 12, 2021 12:19 pm Title: Dry Spell

I have a funny feeling you might end up finding Hermione's time turner a bit more chaos than it's worth, Pam.

Okay, I *really* enjoyed how much you pulled all the different threads of Season 5 together in this - they end up weirdly separated in canon when they obviously would've still been playing out alongside each other and weighing on them. The new house, the changes in Pam's routine from New York, the new job, Jim's issues with Charles, the wedding planning - they all interact together really well here to produce, well, Cece.

And also always, I love the details you're coming up with for their relationship. The bit about Jim wanting extra pills for his extra nose and Pam teasing him about it just makes the whole thing feel really lived in. (And the idea of Creed marrying them in the parking lot has given me... an idea.) Also, turning them from Jam to jelly made me giggle.

The date - and how it ends up tying into Pam's expectations of men as set by Roy and exceeded/changed by Jim - is adorable. They're totally the couple that will flirt by double entendre right in front of someone they know, especially after it's been that long for them.

I thought you captured this well - how this change is a challenge for them, if not really a Challenge For Them in the sense that they'll face in other moments of their relationship, and how they ended up wrestling it (and each other) to the ground.

Glad to see this one updated! Now... about that time turner...

Author's Response:

So true, but still.

SO I always get such a thrill from your reviews because you always notice and mention the bits that just tickled me when I wrote them and how you see the things I tried to show if not exactly tell. And you have such a poetic way of putting it... they all interact together really well here to produce, well, Cece.

(and how about that- usually it's the reviewer quoting the author and not the other way around but this was just so well said. That and the wrestling.

So I'm curious and anxious to see what your clever head is thinking of for Creed. 

Thanks as always for your review and support.

 

And now that I broke the *dry spell* on updating this ...I can get back to that time turner... 

 

 

 


Reviewer: warrior4 Signed [Report This]
Date: October 11, 2021 08:59 pm Title: Dry Spell

Nice job as always. Getting into the reasons why Pam might lose track of her meds, the pressures of everything going on right then fits well. I've read similar reasonings in other fics, but you did a great job in really fleshing it all out.

Same with Pam's headspace here. Her worries about Jim and his thoughts in regards to their dry spell. Clearly her previous relationship was casting a bit of a shadow there, but Jim being the guy he is, is able to diffuse some of those worries. Also nice that they were trying to get over their dry spell, but life kept happening. Very realistic there.

However finally they're able to break the spell and enjoy a nice afternoon, evening, and quite probably morning too. The double meaning with their conversations with Beth were just delightful. Always fun to see that Beth can kind of see through their ploys, but has the wherewithal to know when is and isn't her place to pry. Probably why she's their favorite server.

Great job.

Author's Response:

Thanks Warrior.

I figured there may be some similar tellings being that soon after is when they find out about the pregnancy but I imagine up until the upheaval that had them both a little frazzled they were being cautious and protected.

I do like to present the realism of life and love. And Roy - yeah he did a number on her - thankfully she fixed that mistake and is with Jim now. 

Not a lot of Beth in this one, but she was busy and they were in a rush to get to round two. 

Thank you for another encouraging review. Always great to hear.

Reviewer: boredhswf Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: July 18, 2021 01:23 pm Title: Fools and Clowns

Ah, very timely with the Alex reference. I have often thought that Jim's range of emotions about her life/friends in NY is not nearly explored enough. From what he overheard of Alex's speech to the whole car turn around and 'I am not that guy and we are not that couple'- So much interesting stuff there.

"Sometimes Jim would recline in the papasan chair she brought from her place and watch her work, plying her with silly questions about her techniques and muses until she would throw him out for asking too many and keeping her from her craft." Okay but I really love this visual of him so thank you.

I really love the mention of the creepy clown, and the Valentine's day lunch with Phyllis and Bob- they were both very clever tie-ins. This was a great chapter! :)

Author's Response:

Had I not responded to this - I thought I did.

I agree - not matter how much he deep down knew she was his there is no way he wasn't affected in some way by her having gone off to explore her art (and herself) in NY. Glad you felt it was apt.

Well I loved writing that scene - there was a very specific vision in my head and glad it translated for you.

That clown, I never really got it until I wrote this chapter and then I understood exactly what it was there for (even if it was never intended by the writers). You gotta love Phyllis. 

 

Thanks so much. Your comments mean the world. 

Reviewer: PBeesly Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: July 17, 2021 11:26 am Title: Fools and Clowns

I love this story! Thank you for writing it.

Author's Response:

Well thank you for sharing your review and that you love it. It really means a lot to hear from you. I've been having a lot of fun writing it but knowing it is entertaining to others really does make my day.

 

 

 

Reviewer: Trish Tinkerbell Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: July 13, 2021 05:26 pm Title: Fools and Clowns

That was a really nice culmination of clown and green eyed monster. I share the same sentiment about Jim being a little insecure, no matter what how confidant he plays.
I really liked how you presented Alex and Pam's friendship being platonic despite of Alex's unspoken feelings. I liked how they made up, the little tense morning and Phyllis being Phyllis even when she was not around. And Bob Vance, Vance Refrigeration being so in character.
Thanks for the update. Your work is great.

Author's Response:

 

How could he not be a little insecure, aren't we all in some way?

But he waited so long for her, he couldn't help but react as he did.

And I know some people are not fans of Phyllis (and she has her slightly mean moments) but I am a fan.

thanks so much. getting your review was a real joy. 

 

 

Reviewer: grc73 Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: July 10, 2021 12:37 pm Title: Fools and Clowns

Oh, I enjoyed this!

I liked what you did with Beth, Phyllis and Bob (I have to stop myself typing that as Bob Vance, Vance Refrigeration.)

I think you captured Jim's insecurities about Pam's friendship with Alex perfectly. And I think Jim would be right to be nervous, he recognises Alex's interest and you captured that beautifully.

There is a lot to love about this chapter, but what I loved most is what you did with them to get rid of the clown painting is totally in character, feels like it would have been canon and even something that might have been in a deleted scene from that episode (if The Office was on HBO, obviously.)

Author's Response:

I'm so glad you did. In case you didn't know that clown shows up again in garage sale episode so there is confirmation it came down. And I love to make up the back stories to those little throwaway things others may not even really think about. It was just a matter of figuring out how to get it down and as the idea came so did the idea to make it a stand-in for some unspoken thing that was still out there following him overhearing Alex.

Phyllis and Bob Vance, Vance Refr. - they are the other clowns the title refers to, and are just a hoot to write. But her heart is just so big too.

Thanks for all your great reviews always and your support. 

 

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed [Report This]
Date: July 10, 2021 10:53 am Title: Fools and Clowns

The metaphorical use of the clown photo for their forward progress as a couple was pretty cleverly done! I'm a sucker for circularity, and I thought you brought this around well, and dovetailed a couple of storylines together effectively that were mainly disconnected in canon.

It does seem like a call at that particular time would be likelier to produce a bad reaction in Jim, the kind he might be able to keep to himself at other moments. I thought you captured how their fights would go, too... a little dose of past angst, a few clever, snippy comments that ended up getting out of hand.

Interesting seeing Pam wanting to stay connected with Alex, which is something I don't think I've seen pop up in fic... and justified very effectively with their shared background and the lack of art community for Pam. I thought you did well making the point that all declarations of love (or "you should pursue your art no matter what your relationship status with your fiancee") are not created equal, and that Jim's mattered not because he said it but because Pam felt the same way.

I am unabashedly Team Phyllis and pro-Phyllis as shipper on board, so I appreciated the way you used her here. It's very in character - she's had her own live soap opera playing out right in front of her for years, and the only downside is NO ONE TO TALK ABOUT IT WITH, so obviously she's going to be eager to go through it with Beth! (Speaking of people who've written Jam fanfiction.)

Also, much rejoicing at the Vances sneaking off to hook up mid-meal. Glad to see they don't just do it in company.

Author's Response: I do enjoy circularity too and love when I can make it work in my fics.  


I’ve been wanting to portray the real side of relationships (ie a fight) for a while now. Not a season 9 real turmoil type one but one of those regular ones that exist in even the best relationships. But I always had a hard time coming up with the thing they might fight about.  When I started on this chapter it just kind of happened, as it did within the story too.    

Thank you for reminding me what I had always meant to include in end notes.  That after not much longer the friendship would fizzle away but also being with me that at least in the immediate post art school time she would want to keep some connections with the contacts she made there.  

You said you wanted to see all the office couples are Christopher’s so of course we had to see the Vances and I have a theory that they like to test out all the restrooms.  

And yes, Phyllis has been dying to discuss all.  Beth is the perfect person to dish with.  

Thanks as always for the review.  

Reviewer: warrior4 Signed [Report This]
Date: July 09, 2021 10:57 pm Title: Fools and Clowns

I think you brought a lot of realism into this chapter. Clearly Jim has some issues with Alex and yeah as you so excellently wrote here he sees a lot of the past seeming to repeat itself. Pam is engaged. A guy who is not her fiancé is interested in her. That guy keeps calling or trying to make connections. What's to stop history from repeating itself? So their fight about it felt very realistic. It can't be sunshine and rainbows all the time and that was a good way to bring that in.

Though the way he first gets out of the doghouse by literally falling at her feet and her joking about it was a great way to ease off a lot of the tension.

Love that Beth is so over the moon about their engagement. Great visuals there.

The heart-to-heart about everything was just what they needed to patch everything up. Pam finally gets through to him that there's nothing to worry about. He finally gets it too. So the rush to get home felt earned in that regard.

That's how they got the clown painting off the wall? Wickedly delightful there. Loved it.

Author's Response:

I've been wanted to write about a Jam fight for a long time (because like you say it isn't always sunshine and rainbows) and just never seemed to be able to think up a realistic and interesting thing for them to fight about. When I began this chapter it just sorta happened (just as in life). I'm glad you felt it was realistic and how it ended. You can imagine what happened next.

 

Thanks as always for the read and review. 

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed [Report This]
Date: June 20, 2021 12:36 pm Title: Best Laid Plans of Mice and Salesmen

*sigh* Poor Jim.

I thought the two alternate proposals were very creative, and definitely would have met the context of an ass-kicking within the Gold-verse. Good job building on the world you've built here. (Poor Beth! Missed out on her points!) And it adds some good context to Jim's casual revelation that he and Pam had an honest conversation about delaying the engagement if he swung and missed a few more times after the Goodbye Toby mishap.

I love Jim's sympathy for Dwight here. I knows what it's like to be in those shoes. (And also was amused that Jim is that aware of Dwight's moods that he kind of picked up on *something* of the Dwight-Angela affair). It's always been my personal headcanon that Jim spent a fair amount of time that summer pranking Andy that we didn't see, so I'm happy to get a better sense of his irritation here.

(For the record, I think the click proposal, while not ass-kicking, would have been charming in its way, and I hope Jim used it for another romantic moment. And I *loved* the way the IT guy line came up!)

Author's Response:

I like that term - Gold-verse. There really is so much gold symbolism within the show that it really isn't just mine, but I will take it as a name for the extended world I created for them. 
Small point - the sunrise was part of the canon-divergent story but I still used it - that part was still feasible within a canon world.

You know how I like to extend upon the things mentioned or revealed in show with little back-story or further mention. This was how I saw that conversation coming to light. They knew where they were going, it was just a matter of when they would get there.

Jim and Dwight - they can deny their brotherly love but it is there, we see that also through the series. Of course he would be pissed at Andy for what it was doing to Andy too. Yes I agree with your headcanon too and Andy deserved it, and he could lay off Dwight during his heartache (even if he seemed to be getting over it faster than expected).

Glad you liked the mouse proposal - which was my way of working back to the chapter title (originally was going to be simply "Of Mice and Salesman" but wasn't sure that would be as clear). 

Thanks as always and for always seeing the little things.

Reviewer: grc73 Signed [Report This]
Date: June 19, 2021 10:32 pm Title: Best Laid Plans of Mice and Salesmen

“As the sun painted the sky with metallic specs of copper and fire and cast its radiance over the landscape in the distance, he felt something shift within him. He knew before then he was in love but it was in that moment that he could taste eternity with her, know their souls would be tied to each other forevermore.”

Absolutely beautiful, Max. I loved that description but I also love how you filled in the blanks of post- that non-proposal. Absolutely fits with canon and it feels so natural. Poor Beth though, she must have been really thrown!

Author's Response:

You know the reference that was from - and I almost thought I wouldn't be able to describe it differently than I had before - especially within this story, which I felt was a little more lighthearted than the original. I'm really pleased you felt it too.

Yeah, we knew they must have discussed waiting and I had to imagine not only that but Pam must have just about figured it out, that he had been on the verge of asking. But I also felt after that she would be expecting it even more which would lesson the magic and element of surprise. Hard as it might of been for her to tell him to wait - I figured she might.

I really wanted to share the few other ways I thought were fun, if a bit corny, but isn't that Jim? But because this is a canon-complaint story I had to present them as more ways he didn't get to propose.

Poor Beth, I think more than it being about the win she was excited to see her favorite couple get engaged in her presence and as we know now she won't. 

Thanks for your review - always makes my day...and your story recommendation  - I enjoyed that one too and felt very in tune with that writer. 

 

 

Reviewer: warrior4 Signed [Report This]
Date: June 19, 2021 07:43 pm Title: Best Laid Plans of Mice and Salesmen

Freakin' Andy indeed. Gotta feel for Jim here. He's ready, he's had the ring for months only to be stifled at every turn. Of course we know the real proposal more than kicks her ass, but still it would have been fun here too. Beth is very quick on the uptake. Love that about her character. Really good look into Jim's mindset here. He's a prankster yes, but he's also not cruel. So he's not the kind of guy to stomp over Andy or really take a dig at Dwight. Good for you Jim.

Always fun getting an update for this one.

Author's Response:

I really felt for Jim in this part of the series. I was fuming at Andy. But Jim handled it so well and without having to have gone through anger management. 

So we know they had discussed it afterwards and got to a place where they thought they should wait - this was me filling in the blanks. Plus coming up with a few other proposal ideas.

In a way it was nice that they could celebrate her getting in to Pratt as it's own thing.

Beth, always fun to include her in her small ways. 

Thanks as always for sharing your thoughts. 

Reviewer: warrior4 Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: June 04, 2021 02:12 am Title: Bean Counter

Awww, look at you go Jim making her birthday feel all sorts of special. I like how he made sure that it started out right the night before and continued with a nice wake up the day of. Even with Jim not on the PPC I'm sure he'd figure out that there would be something that would be off.

Micheal's Micheal-ness seemed full on. You really got his character right. Trying to do something nice, not quite getting it right, but not really figuring out why he didn't. Do I detect shades of Office Ladies tracking all the different plants at reception and thus Angela giving Pam hopefully a nice hearty plant that will stick around a bit longer? Nice touch.

The date at Christopher's, while a bit more brief this time around was nonetheless lovely. The bracelet was all sorts of special too.

Her reflections on starting a family with Jim vs. Roy seemed on par as well. With Roy it was always yet another thing to put off. With Jim it's a near certainty. Especially with her envisioning that scene so clearly in her artist mind eye. Loved that insight into her mind. Great job with this chapter. I loved it.

Author's Response:

Like I said in chat - love writing Jim. He can do all the romantic things I imagine he would. 
And I have loads of fun writing Michael - now what do you think wasn't so nice - glitterbombing her and her coffee (that stuff never comes out you know -years later Erin will still be finding glitter around her desk) or saying he was going to kill her (humanely but still).
But ultimately I think the party was sweet and clever (even if I'm being not so humble by saying it since it was my idea) even if a year too soon.

Oh yes it is - a nod to Angela and her reception desk plant tracking. and you weren't in the chat for the perfume debate but the bit about Michael's gift cause quite a stir- (I had planned to go another way in her response)

I had a bean bracelet that I lost - now I want one again. Let's see if the hubby comes through again. He's heard me talk about this chapter/story. It was really iconic once upon a time but wonder if younger readers will even know what it is?

The baby stuff - well again, I love writing Jim and I had his show reaction to pull from.

Not sure if this was 2000th review but if not, it helped you get to 2000 so congratulations on that. Always glad you get your wonderful words. Feels incomplete until they appear.

Reviewer: boredhswf Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: June 02, 2021 01:41 pm Title: Bean Counter

This is probably my favorite thing you’ve written. I love the entire waking up section and the self reflection of a birthday.

“Of course, without her contacts in, he was still a blur, as was the bouquet of pink puffs that sat atop the dresser behind his body. But even out of focus, she could sense the incandescent smile spread across his face and knew it was peonies that filled the room with the delightful scent that brought to mind memories of their first date.”— this was a fantastic paragraph.

The glitter and the wrong year was so cute and you captured the vibe of the office so well.

“Toby and Oscar gave her Dragonfly in Amber, the second of the Outlander series. She didn’t have the heart to tell them she was already in the middle of the fourth book so instead she thanked them graciously and made a mental note to drop by Barnes and Noble later that week to exchange it for The Fiery Cross. “ — I mean, I love this for a multitude of reasons, and not just because I liked FC more than DA.

“You know it wouldn’t be the worst thing, if you were. In fact, it would be pretty amazing.”— I really really love this aspect of Jim’s personality. Like, a lot.

This was really cute and I enjoyed it immensely. It’s a great addition to this already well done series. Love it!

Author's Response:

Thank you -  I knew I was getting the warm fuzzies while it came together and wasn't sure if it was just in my head or my mood. Your saying that is sweet and assuring. I can honestly say that it is the influence of all that I read that has changed how I write. So a big thanks to you, among others.

So I really enjoy writing office antics and I was smiling through the whole middle section. 

I'm still a ways from FC but something to look forward to. Betcha Jim is reaping the rewards of Oscar's original suggestion and the reading that followed. Not that they needed help in that department but I'm sure he's not complaining right?

Well, me too.  I always loved that Jim had babysat Sasha, did so well with Stacy's kid, and  of course I wrote about the relationship with his niece and nephew but nothing would compare to a kid of his own and I think he got a little lost in the idea when Beth brought it up.

So glad you enjoyed - it's always music to hear that.

 

  

  

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed [Report This]
Date: June 01, 2021 08:09 pm Title: Bean Counter

"They’d both been up late last night engaged in a little pre-birthday amusement that had her singing happy birthday and then halleluiah as he did things to her body that made her wish every night was her birthday eve." HA.

Certainly seems sensible that this would be a moment of reflection for Pam, on all sorts of levels - she's at the age, we know what's coming later this year for her, and of course she's finally in a settled place in her personal life. I also think it's a good note that Pam's horizons have opened now - the point she's clearly at with Jim is one she would have killed to be at with Roy, but there's also a lot more she feels capable of doing now.

Ah, poor glitter-covered Pam. And say what you like about Angela, she would not have made these mistakes. Of course, her party also wouldn't have been as much fun. Michael can come through, if you give him enough free mistakes.

HA. I was wondering if the fragrance at the beginning was where that came into it. Nice way to get around it.

Well, I hope folks check out Butterflies... because Jim and Pam are still some time away from finding out the extra significance of that bean...

Author's Response:

True about Angela but come on Angela could never have come up with that party - was she ever a kid?

Amazing how the right partner can change your perspective but also makes you want to better more - for yourself and for them. So many things changed for Pam when she got out of her own way (sure Roy was to blame a little but It was really herself - good for Jim for giving her the little wake -up call she needed more than once)

Yeah so I told you I worked it out without having to have her have a scent she already wore - spelling Night Swept was enough and I could only imagine - wasn't a huge Drakar fan to begin with myself.

I hope so too because I think it makes the gift that much sweeter.

Thanks as always - always tickled to hear from you. 

 

Reviewer: dosteen Signed [Report This]
Date: May 11, 2021 07:46 am Title: Perfect Presents and Lucky Stars

This is quite lovely. I'm enjoying this OC you have in the waitress Beth.

Author's Response: Thanks so much.  I am having a lot of fun with her and with writing about some of the experiences out favorite couple got to have (in my mind) offscreen. 


I’m so pleased that you are enjoying.  

Reviewer: boredhswf Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: May 04, 2021 07:18 am Title: Perfect Presents and Lucky Stars

Nice book choice.;) I kind of love that it was Oscar that suggested it too. All the little details of the gifts were so adorable and of course, the entire section with Beth was charming as usual. Loved it.

Author's Response:

Thanks Bored - Glad you enjoyed. I was going to have them read it for Finer Things club - but I thought this worked well too.

There were other nods with the gifts and check out candle I just bought (after posting) 

<img src="stories/3919/images/IMG_2476.JPG">

 But my favorite was that the first jewelry he bought her was the anklet (although technically the first jewelry he buys her is a ring) . A little more personal and private and something only she would know she had on most days. 

I have fun writing Beth because as you can guess she is loosely based on me - I'm mostly shy but strangely enough also very chatty. 

Always love to hear from you. Thanks again. 

 

Reviewer: warrior4 Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: May 04, 2021 05:18 am Title: Perfect Presents and Lucky Stars

Lots of fun as always. Micheal trying to figure out where Jim and Pam go for their romantic dates really seems to track. As does Jim and Pam turning right around when they see his car out front.

The details of the gifts were a lot of fun. It makes a lot of sense that Jim would put that much thought and creativity into his gifts for her. And for his dad. ;)

Always fun when they finally get to Christophers. Rough story there for Beth. Yeah, there are some real jerks out there. But there are some good ones too.

Wonderful job as always.

Author's Response:

Yeah we know he was desperate to go out with them.

I had a lot of fun with the gifts - loved being able to call out other stories like Razor's Edge (even if it didn't completely track it was a nod). My favorite gift was however, the anklet - even though it wasn't the first item of jewelry he bought her, it was the first he gave her and I wanted it to have deeper meaning and be something that was a little more private - the two of them would be the only to know when she wore it (unless of course they had another Office Beach day).

Poor Beth, hopefully she'll find one of the good ones soon - but it's not Creed.

Thanks as always for your thoughts. Always love to hear them.

 

 

 

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: May 03, 2021 08:19 pm Title: Perfect Presents and Lucky Stars

You did well here capturing the still fresh feeling of giddiness on Jim's part... they've been together for a while, so it's a little muted, but he's still getting to do a lot of things he'd always imagined with her for the first time, and you found that balance. And the flashback to his train of thought in buying the teapot, and how carefully he had to weigh everything he was up against, find something that would speak to Pam without triggering Roy, felt very true to canon. Thank goodness he's done with that period. And the little tie-ins, exactly what emotional experience each piece spoke to, was great.

The Dwight prank with the timers is great. That would drive Dwight ballistic.

Definitely fun to see Jim's Christmas gifts to her here, and the lengths they had to go to to duck a double-date with Michael and Jan pre-dinner party... there definitely are some Stories implied by the beginning of that episode.

Hmmmm. I know you said the headbanger isn't Dwight, but I'm very much wondering if Beth's jerky paramour is someone we know now. Not sure I see Stanley as a gym person, and Creed would never have been that subtle (I love the idea to set them up!) Packer's not married... hmm. Paul Faust of Paul Faust Disaster Kits Limited?

Jim's relief at never having to try to give his heart to someone else is a good closing line!

EGGS - I did NOT do as well as this as I thought I would, but:

-Him aligning the reflection so he can see her is definitely one... feels like maybe Comfect's Notices?
-The new Christmas tradition from Beets on the Tree
-The Snoopy mug from New Year's in New Jersey
-THE ALLEN EDMONDS OXFORDS! I guess it's good someone got SOMETHING out of all of Pam's work searching, because heaven knows Michael didn't.
-The Ugly Sweater party is from Beets on the Tree...
-The stepstool
-The gifts they were eying for their parents is definitely from SOMETHING
-A bunch of direct references to their canceled plans from New Year's in New Jersey
-Is the teapot's ability to help them travel in time a Paradox reference?

Author's Response:

Your detailed reviews always make my day.

This  one was a lot of fun to write - one of my favorite things was a way to tie back the shoes from They Can’t All Be Winners to this story... at first Pam was going to give him shoes as a gift but then I thought having it be the shoebox where prized possessions were stored felt right to me. 

You always appreciate my pranks - and that makes me happy since they are not easy to come up with so love to see them noticed.

The rest of the gifts were fun too since some were nods to other MTTers.  

Yeah, as they say stick a fork in him cause he's done!

Thanks as always.   

 

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: April 21, 2021 05:56 pm Title: Losing Points

This feels like it very much captures this vibe of their relationship in Season 4, this moment of excitement of being able to be with each other and discovering what they like and exploration and giddiness. And I enjoy this backstory for why Pam stepped away from their usual standards of office behavior.

I also very much buy, especially with her reaction to the lack of calls after the engagement, that Pam might be a little grumpy about how quickly everyone moved on, even as she enjoyed being part of a normal couple.

“I got a really special present this year. It was a long time coming but it was well worth the wait.” - This is a VERY Jim line.

HA. I love this. I want to see more of Beth's adventures with every Dunder Mifflin couple.

Author's Response:

Thanks as ever for taking time to review - I knew you were probably busy writing for JBD.

They are deep in that new love period and glad you felt it came through - and glad you agreed she would be a little sad at the lack of enthusiasm or the speed at which it passed. After all they'd been through and all that sneaking around she really wanted a bit more for a bit longer. (kind of like when you finally post a story you've been working on for so long and it gets a few reviews and jelly beans and then just falls away into he archive)

Always do love to hear when you think a dialogue line or action of one of the characters is very in character.

As for Beth's adventures with the other DM couples - I was hoping you'd enjoy it - 


At the end of DM Infinity Part 1, when Dwight and Angela are on their date  I a long time ago decided they were at Christopher's -  I tried to set up the scene in an earlier chapter describing the other room of the restaurant like I saw on screen. The lattice trellis and lights, etc. I thought it perfect way to tie back to Beth and this story. And Kelly is totally a drink-thrower, right.

Reviewer: warrior4 Signed [Report This]
Date: April 21, 2021 05:28 pm Title: Losing Points

You're right. All sorts of fluffy fun. For the most part. Pam's internal thoughts about her sweater was a lot of fun. That Jim is not one to honk from the parking lot seems right on. I get the feeling that especially this early in their I 100% feel he would go out of his way to ensure he was nothing like Pam's ex. Even with that, it's delightful to see that it's the little things that are endearing to each other. Taking time to notice the small things, and by noticing the small things, they both reap big rewards.

Her thoughts as the time goes on about how everyone knows about their relationships seem to track too. All summer it's been this Big Thing between the two of them. Likewise there's all the history they've both had and others around the office have picked up on too. So for it to be kind of dismissed fairly quickly would kind of seem like a let down, even if her rational brain knows the reasoning behind it.

Weekend Christopher's seems fun. A little more dudded up for the weekend rush. Is that really a thing nice places will do? Just kinda curious. Pam kicking Jim under the table seems fine too. She was initially hesitant to prank Dwight right after the breakup and only relented with the self-aware DM Infinity bot after more than due cause. Kind soul that Pam is, that makes a lot of sense for me. Reminding Jim to cool it in public, even if she'll also enjoy the in private wisecracks.

That both Dwight and Angela and Ryan and Kelly had their bad dinners right in a row at the same place might be a little far fetched, but it makes for a fun story, so no harm no foul.

Always fun to get an update for this one.

Author's Response:

Sometimes a little fluffy fun is needed - after all that's a lot of who they are...
Jim and Roy - world's apart but to defend Roy and not martyrize Jim - the relationship is still new and like you say he's doing everything to be the anti-Roy - I'm sure after 10 years together he'll take to honking too.

Yeah, the sneaking around and all that it took for them to get there and all they got was Michael's speech, a couple of congrats and a few snide remarks - of course she's a little let down. 

Pam does have a soft spot for Dwight and would feel bad, especially having known how long the Dwangla thing was going on and how much it probably was hurting him. But she would also get a kick out of it too.

So at the end of DM Infinity Part 1, we see Dwight and Angela on their date - watching it again I had my aha moment and decided they were at Christopher's -  I tried to set up the scene in an earlier chapter describing the other room of the restaurant like I saw on screen. The lattice trellis and lights, etc. I mean I had to take advantage of their breakup and how it played into the Dating Pool game. And Kelly is a total drink-thrower, right.

Thanks as always - more fluff to come with this one.

You must login (register) to review or leave jellybeans