Reviews For I Wish YOU would
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Reviewer: warrior4 Signed [Report This]
Date: September 09, 2021 03:44 pm Title: Chapter 6 - Something New Something Old

Nice work here. There's still a lot of unresolved tension that's for sure. The signs of Karen's presence for example. However the subtext of Jim wanting to be back to who he really is was great to read.

I get that it's a little hard for them to get their footing again. It's been a hard year for both and their relationship has been strained. Makes sense that it'll take some time to get back to where they once were. However it also looks like they've got all the time in the world for it too.

Author's Response: Thank you warrior4. You are so wonderful and amazing. You ensure that you give me feedback on every chapter I post and I am grateful for that. 

I am so happy you read into the music subtext. I tried to bring out the strains and awkwardness of two besties who are reconnecting after an year of not talking, despite being just 6 feet’s apart. It’s like social distancing but in their case it was emotional and hurtful.
 
Appreciate you taking out time for this :) 

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed [Report This]
Date: September 09, 2021 11:31 am Title: Chapter 6 - Something New Something Old

I love Pam and Jim being confronted with the way Karen has left her mark on his space and how they continue to dance around it while also addressing it... and the callback to the driving lessons is a nice touch!

Author's Response: Thank you for picking up on that part. I really worked on the ways to keep Karen present in their bubble despite her being not there physically. Jim was dating her for months, she was more than a means to their happy ending. And they both has to acknowledge that their reluctance, confusion and cowardice has caused more hurt than they experienced.

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed [Report This]
Date: June 26, 2021 07:11 am Title: Chapter 5- Pam's Casa

I thought you did well here finding organic little moments for their past to come up. Feels realistic that she wouldn't so much stop and let the memories wash over her as much as various moments in the process would end up recalling different times she'd thought about this night.

I thought the Snoopy sheets were a nice detail - good mixture of comic and exploring the sexual tension between them. And Pam not *quite* being able to manage her shoes is VERY Pam Beesly.

Author's Response: Thank you for your time and review. I project myself in "Pam" and have had my own share of klutz experiences of heels, so this one came from that. I am glad you liked my little moments of flashbacks where they both still get stuck in Past and then try to center back to present. I am the worst person in writing anything sexual but you guys have been extremely supportive with whatever subtle stuff I could come up with. 

Reviewer: Basscop69 Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: June 23, 2021 04:36 am Title: Chapter 5- Pam's Casa

I've just been catching up on this - I love a good fic about what happens after Pam says yes, and this one is so sweet! Although I also like the small notes of angst throughout (like Pam remembering her hair in this chapter, ouch), which I think feels very true to the fact that they haven't magically resolved everything at this point and still have stuff to talk about. I really like all the attention to detail with Pam's outfit in this one, her knowing that Jim fell in love with her in her boring work clothes, and the fact that she's wearing the shoes she got with the money from her wedding shoes - it's great. And I love their Snoopy exchange at the end, and where his thoughts jumped to with what Pam was saying, hehe. Can't wait to see what their date is like!

Author's Response: Thank you for the review. You are one of my favorite write here so hearing from you is like a fan moment. I feel so happy that you like the slight angst among the sweet moments. I have added the link to Pam's dress and I hope you get time to check that out.  It makes me so warm that you picked on little details of her shoes and snoopy sheets, I am not very good with suggestive dialogues or thoughts so it's good to know that you liked my version there. I hope you like the date, once I finally get around it. 

Reviewer: Merria Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: June 21, 2021 05:20 pm Title: Chapter 5- Pam's Casa

So great that you updated this story. Can’t wait to read more.
Of course I needed a visual of Pam’s clothes, but the link doesn’t work 🤷🏻r05;a92;a039; I’ll just use my imagination

Author's Response:

I am so sorry about the stupid link. I don't understand why it is not working. It is such a nice picture of Jenna so I was really hoping I could share that with everyone. I am gonna figure that out though :)

I am glad you liked the update. Thank you !!

 

Reviewer: warrior4 Signed [Report This]
Date: June 21, 2021 04:21 pm Title: Chapter 5- Pam's Casa

An adorable mix of nervous and playful. They're both on pin and needles because this is a BIG thing for them. After all this time they're finally starting out really together. Why wouldn't they be nervous and analyzing everything.

Pam's speech about the flowers felt very heartfelt. Her asking him to pin up her favorite flower in her hair was swoon worthy. Just wonderful.

The tour was fun. We could feel the tension in her room. I don't think Jim would mind the Snoopy sheets. He probably thinks it adds more to a home like feeling.

Can't wait to see how the rest of the night goes.

Author's Response:

I am so glad you liked the flower speech. It took me an hour to get it right (though I wish I could get it better). And that flower in her hair was my favorite part too so thank you! I was toying with creating the right tension, maintaining the T rating and not sounding too cliche. I am excited about the night though, still in works ;)

You are such a religious reviewer, Thank you for being my incredible source of motivation !! 

Reviewer: Maxine Abbott Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: June 11, 2021 08:11 pm Title: Chapter 4 - Not enough for you

You packed a lot into that first paragraph. It said a lot that despite coming back, and even with a girlfriend, he'd still not fully unpacked, not sure after a half a year if he planned to stay. But to stay somewhere you have to be somewhere and up until tonight he wasn't really there.

Now you scared me by having his take a rest, but he got his s cond wind and what a sweet description, his whistling. And I like how you bring up the bit amount the money and what she had to accept as part of her choices.

The next chapter will be nice to see - keep it up. You've got a sweet story going here even with the angst in their past. The more you write, the more you find your voice.

Author's Response: That's such a nice way to put across, to stay somewhere you have to be there and he still wasn't, at least not until now. I am so glad you picked on little things I did there. It is such a compliment when writers like yourself, acknowledge work of some beginner like me. Thank you so much !!

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: June 11, 2021 07:02 pm Title: Chapter 4 - Not enough for you

Jim still not being unpacked after six months actually sounds a lot like a Girl7 choice, as is Jim joyfully getting WAY the hell ahead of himself.

The dialogue at the end is a nice touch, and I really appreciate you acknowledging that Pam's finances may well have been in a bad state post-Roy.

Author's Response: Thank you so much. I know expenses was truly something easily ignored but it's a real struggle added to what she has been through. Thank you for liking the part about being unpacked still. It was a risk I took if it would sound convincing enough. I really work hard on the dialogues because conversation is just not my forte, I am good at inner monologue so your words mean a lot :)

Reviewer: warrior4 Signed [Report This]
Date: June 11, 2021 05:41 pm Title: Chapter 4 - Not enough for you

It's angsty, but there's also more than a little hope shining through. They've both been through the wringer this year so it makes sense there would still be some underlying hesitation. Especially with his mini-montage of how everything has gone to this point.

It's been almost a year and Jim still hasn't unpack from the move back. I can see that. On the outside he puts on a mask of confidence, but there in private he's still reeling from everything.

Though the future is looking up that's for sure. Nice job.

Author's Response:

Thank you for the support. I was sort of taking a risk, stating that a person could stay packed 6 months in, but I have done that  Being in a place which didn't feel like home, I was pretty much living out of a suitcase myself. I do agree that despite of his cool exterior, he did have some insecurities which only surfaced on few occasions , especially after Casino Night, he became better at pretending. 

 

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: May 29, 2021 02:27 pm Title: Chapter 3 - This is it..or is it?

I love the notes of Dwight trying to recover his lost authority here, and Kevin being physically unable to restrain himself from referencing "The List" in front of Pam.

And I thought them finally texting again, and that leading Pam to go through their old texts felt like a very realistic detail and a good way of looking at their history.

Re: formatting. I usually just save the text as an html file and upload it like that - preserves the formatting.

Author's Response:

Thank you for catching those little things. Yeah i thought Kevin is not one of the subtle guy. I think his biggest accomplishment was Oscar Angela and senator scandal. And well he didn't really anything here too so I guess I have to give him some credit. I am so glad you liked my text trail part. I tried to imagine in what I used to do ...in my dating days...well past the drama now but well it used to be fun :D

Thank you for the tip. I am gonna try it in future chapters. 

Reviewer: warrior4 Signed [Report This]
Date: May 29, 2021 12:21 am Title: Chapter 3 - This is it..or is it?

So I went to read this chapter and wrote those last two reviews without remembering I'd already reviewed those chapter. I'm sure you're really upset about getting more reviews.

Anyway, again a good look into her mindset. The scroll through previous texts would yeah trigger some memories. Especially if one of the last one's was the unanswered text after Diwalli. However she's in a better mental place now. And also Jim does text her back. It's delightful to see how such a seemingly simple thing could improve her mood so much. Nice job.

Can't wait to see your version of their date.

Author's Response:

Oh Not at all. I am glad you reviewed my chapters again. More the merrier. :)

Thank you for saying that about the text thing. I thought a lot about how to get the text thing simple yet meaningful, your words helped me feel so pleased that it did get through somewhere in my chapter. Keep the love coming :) 

Reviewer: warrior4 Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: May 29, 2021 12:14 am Title: Chapter 2 - What was the question ?

Pam's excitement to be in this moment with Jim is palpable. After a very long year fill with to this point some of the hardest growth she's ever gone through, the timing is right and she and Jim are really and truly about to start out on a path completely together. She didn't have to put on extra make-up, wear a special outfit, or anything like that. She just lived up to her own potential and was the same silly, down-to-earth, beautifully simple Pam he fell in love with.

The prize is the real Jim is finally back and he's hers. Loved it. Onto the next chapter.

Author's Response: Thank you for your review, as always. Yeah I could only imagine that year long yearning can fill you up with so much emotions. I am totally on in with you that she doesn't need anything different because he fell for her dorky self before anything else. Looking forward to your feedback on future chapters.

Reviewer: warrior4 Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: May 29, 2021 12:08 am Title: Chapter 1 - It's a Date

Good peak into his mind here. I'm sure there were a lot of feelings bouncing around in his head during that day. He's fresh off his break-up with Karen and it's just after asking Pam out. So it really fits he's still a little confused. Nice way to get all that together.

Author's Response:

Thanks Warrior. I always felt that Jim won't be a complete jerk to just jump from Karen to Pam without a second glance or conflicted feelings. I feel that's part of the reason he didn't go after Pam right after her Beach speech. Life is not as simple as be changed by just words, there are actions to follow and consequences to face. 

Once again thank you for encouragement. Needs all of it from someone so great !! 

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: February 27, 2021 10:59 am Title: Chapter 2 - What was the question ?

True fact: Jim and Karen would've lasted one week maximum if Jim had been at his old desk. And Pam knows it.

Author's Response: Yeah I guess Jim would have a hard time ignoring Pam then, especially with the amount of time she invested staring at him. Karen definitely would have had it harder, not understanding what's happening with two weirdly familiar strangers. Guess it all worked out.

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: February 27, 2021 10:59 am Title: Chapter 2 - What was the question ?

True fact: Jim and Karen would've lasted one week maximum if Jim had been at his old desk. And Pam knows it.

Author's Response: Yeah I have to say that I agree with  that. Old habits die hard, especially the ones cultivated over years filled with flirting and jellybeans a86;a039;

Reviewer: Basscop69 Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: February 26, 2021 01:56 pm Title: Chapter 2 - What was the question ?

This is really sweet! I'm not sure I can ever read enough about Jim finally coming back properly and them getting together, and there are some really nice touches in this - Pam reading all the subtle changes in the back of Jim's neck, Michael's confusion over a veterinarian (lol), and just Pam's whole excitement in this chapter. Looking forward to reading more!

Author's Response:

Thank you. You are really generous with your words.

I am extremely touched that you took out time to read and review my work, especially since you noticed little things I did with my characters and their thoughts.

And coming from a gifted writer like you, can’t ask for more :) 

Reviewer: warrior4 Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: February 25, 2021 04:03 pm Title: Chapter 2 - What was the question ?

Great way to get into Pam's mindset here. The only thing she can think about is him and how the finally have the timing right. A brief journey back down memory lane to times of angst, but that pales in comparison to the high she's riding. Very much felt like the rest of the day passed in a flash while she was watching Jim. Loved that even staring at his back, she's got his feelings and moods down pat. Clearly she is still very in tune with him and that's great to see.

A couple typos here and there, but nothing that makes it so you don't know what you're talking about so not really a bit deal.

Looking forward to more.

Author's Response:

Thank you for your feedback.

yeah I am still working on getting the format right and the typos too. 

And thank you for reflecting back on my chapter, how it was more towards the excitement of Pam than the agony. You were so spot on in stating that her current focus was just Jim at the moment. Your review made me feel like I am able to deliver at least some of what I had in mind. Thank you again:)

keep showering your love. It’s really helping my confidence. 

Reviewer: New Hogfan Signed [Report This]
Date: February 25, 2021 02:06 pm Title: Chapter 2 - What was the question ?

I always was felt that there were two Jim’s.
Stamford Jim and Scranton Jim.
Karen was with Stamford Jim.
That Jim was cold, heartless and pretentious.
Scranton Jim was the guy that Pam loved,
and who was friends with those in the office.
So I believe that when Pam thinks that Jim is back, and Michael said the same thing,
it’s Scranton Jim they are referring to.

Author's Response: Spot on ! My thoughts were the same. How Jim didn’t have the same warmth and goofiness of years prior. Something was definitely amiss. 

Thanks for reading into the same sentiment I wanted to convey:) :) 

Reviewer: Maxine Abbott Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: February 23, 2021 11:19 am Title: Chapter 1 - It's a Date

Hello and welcome.

Congratulations on posting your first story. As a somewhat newbie myself I can relate to how much courage it takes to post for the first time.

I love to get all the takes on the missing scenes around season 3-4. I think you did a good job getting at what Jim would have been going through. Happy as he was he was finally going for and getting the woman he truly loved, he was surely wracked with guilt over all that went down with Karen. You did a good job portraying that.

I’m glad to your Karen did not let him off the hook.

I’m looking forward to seeing if your Pam has any concerns about Karen or guilt. But more so looking forward to her reaction now that Jim has chosen her.

One suggestion in the format that you add an extra line drop between ideas and particularly spoken dialogue.

Once again welcome and good job.

Author's Response:

Thank you so much. You are so right, it was quite a big leap for me. I am a big fan of missing scenes too, hence I chose this topic to try out my imagination. 

I am so glad you liked my version of Karen. I always felt that she did get the shorter end of the stick, and well Jim deserved some of the flak if not too much of it. And thank you for noticing and sharing your suggestion regarding format. I am definitely gonna be mindful of that for future chapters. I am actually having a hard time regarding formatting of pasting them here, because its not coming exactly how i wrote them in my word file. I am working on figuring that out.

Thanks again for your time and kindness. 

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: February 23, 2021 11:05 am Title: Chapter 1 - It's a Date

I think the choice of subject matter here is a good one. Jim treats Karen pretty atrociously in canon, and while it doesn't stop us from rooting for him, I think it's good for our sense of his character to see him aware of it and feeling guilty for it as opposed to skipping right by it on the highway to his happy ending.

Congrats on posting your first story! Welcome to the ranks of MTT writers.

Author's Response:

Thank you. I am so glad you liked my version of Jim, wracked in his own guilt. I was not sure how I was gonna build more into that but your words gave me just the right push to dwell more into the feelings of his.

Thank you for the warm welcome. Looking forward to more of your precious encouragement ! 

Reviewer: New Hogfan Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: February 22, 2021 08:35 pm Title: Chapter 1 - It's a Date

This was an interesting start to a new story.
I have to admit that I’m with Karen here because he did continue to use her and shove their relationship into Pam’s face even after beach day. Jim did them both wrong, which is why I was not a fan of him in season 3.

Author's Response:

Thank you for your review. I felt that too regarding Karen’s part. Jim did tag her along and he did break heart(s). Season 3 was not his brightest time for sure.

 

Reviewer: warrior4 Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: February 22, 2021 07:53 pm Title: Chapter 1 - It's a Date

First of all welcome to writing. It can be intimidating to post your first story so well done in that regard.

I like Jim's thoughts here. Everything that's gone on in Season 3 was a huge whirlwind of a lot of confusing emotions. I think it's 100% realistic that even after Pam has said yes to the date that there would still be a lot of those spinning around. So great job getting into his headspace there.

The breakup scene with Karen also seemed realistic. Clearly Karen knew there was something going on, but to find out that Jim is choosing Pam over her I'm sure would hurt. Especially if like Karen says here it's been a week since Pam's declaration and until now Jim has still been choosing Karen.

Really looking forward to your take on Pam's headspace. Great job so far. Keep it up.

Author's Response:

Thank you for your generous words. Coming from you is such an honour since I am such a big fan of your work.

I have read and re-read your stories so many times. I feel so encouraged that someone as good as you found my work something worth reading and reviewing. 

Thanks again for your time and I am gonna look forward to your kindness for my future chapters:)

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