1 [Report This]Date: January 22, 2022 07:16 am Title: Chapter 1 - It's a Date
I like the way you've let them reflect on the past, and their insecurities, even though it looks like it's going in the right direction now. Then... ooft! Can't wait to see where you're going with this!
Thanks for posting!
Author's Response: Thank you Sam for the review. I am glad you felt that I was able to reflect on their insecurities and work on their feelings as a whole. I always imagined that nobody can just skip to the good parts. Its a journey. Let's see how you like the other part to my cliffhanger.
1 [Report This]Date: May 29, 2021 12:08 am Title: Chapter 1 - It's a Date
Good peak into his mind here. I'm sure there were a lot of feelings bouncing around in his head during that day. He's fresh off his break-up with Karen and it's just after asking Pam out. So it really fits he's still a little confused. Nice way to get all that together.
Author's Response:
Thanks Warrior. I always felt that Jim won't be a complete jerk to just jump from Karen to Pam without a second glance or conflicted feelings. I feel that's part of the reason he didn't go after Pam right after her Beach speech. Life is not as simple as be changed by just words, there are actions to follow and consequences to face.
Once again thank you for encouragement. Needs all of it from someone so great !!
1 [Report This]Date: February 23, 2021 11:19 am Title: Chapter 1 - It's a Date
Hello and welcome.
Congratulations on posting your first story. As a somewhat newbie myself I can relate to how much courage it takes to post for the first time.
I love to get all the takes on the missing scenes around season 3-4. I think you did a good job getting at what Jim would have been going through. Happy as he was he was finally going for and getting the woman he truly loved, he was surely wracked with guilt over all that went down with Karen. You did a good job portraying that.
I’m glad to your Karen did not let him off the hook.
I’m looking forward to seeing if your Pam has any concerns about Karen or guilt. But more so looking forward to her reaction now that Jim has chosen her.
One suggestion in the format that you add an extra line drop between ideas and particularly spoken dialogue.
Once again welcome and good job.
Author's Response:
Thank you so much. You are so right, it was quite a big leap for me. I am a big fan of missing scenes too, hence I chose this topic to try out my imagination.
I am so glad you liked my version of Karen. I always felt that she did get the shorter end of the stick, and well Jim deserved some of the flak if not too much of it. And thank you for noticing and sharing your suggestion regarding format. I am definitely gonna be mindful of that for future chapters. I am actually having a hard time regarding formatting of pasting them here, because its not coming exactly how i wrote them in my word file. I am working on figuring that out.
Thanks again for your time and kindness.
1 [Report This]Date: February 23, 2021 11:05 am Title: Chapter 1 - It's a Date
I think the choice of subject matter here is a good one. Jim treats Karen pretty atrociously in canon, and while it doesn't stop us from rooting for him, I think it's good for our sense of his character to see him aware of it and feeling guilty for it as opposed to skipping right by it on the highway to his happy ending.
Congrats on posting your first story! Welcome to the ranks of MTT writers.
Author's Response:
Thank you. I am so glad you liked my version of Jim, wracked in his own guilt. I was not sure how I was gonna build more into that but your words gave me just the right push to dwell more into the feelings of his.
Thank you for the warm welcome. Looking forward to more of your precious encouragement !
1 [Report This]Date: February 22, 2021 08:35 pm Title: Chapter 1 - It's a Date
This was an interesting start to a new story.
I have to admit that I’m with Karen here because he did continue to use her and shove their relationship into Pam’s face even after beach day. Jim did them both wrong, which is why I was not a fan of him in season 3.
Author's Response:
Thank you for your review. I felt that too regarding Karen’s part. Jim did tag her along and he did break heart(s). Season 3 was not his brightest time for sure.
1 [Report This]Date: February 22, 2021 07:53 pm Title: Chapter 1 - It's a Date
First of all welcome to writing. It can be intimidating to post your first story so well done in that regard.
I like Jim's thoughts here. Everything that's gone on in Season 3 was a huge whirlwind of a lot of confusing emotions. I think it's 100% realistic that even after Pam has said yes to the date that there would still be a lot of those spinning around. So great job getting into his headspace there.
The breakup scene with Karen also seemed realistic. Clearly Karen knew there was something going on, but to find out that Jim is choosing Pam over her I'm sure would hurt. Especially if like Karen says here it's been a week since Pam's declaration and until now Jim has still been choosing Karen.
Really looking forward to your take on Pam's headspace. Great job so far. Keep it up.
Author's Response:
Thank you for your generous words. Coming from you is such an honour since I am such a big fan of your work.
I have read and re-read your stories so many times. I feel so encouraged that someone as good as you found my work something worth reading and reviewing.
Thanks again for your time and I am gonna look forward to your kindness for my future chapters:)