=== 

Deleted Scene # 1: Jim has a secret

"What is this?" Karen asked as she ambled over to Jim's desk. "'Musings of a Paper Salesman?'" She continued to read over his shoulder: "'Yesterday I went to a company cocktail party with K.' -- who's 'K?' Is that supposed to be me?"

Jim quickly minimized the window, but Karen was too quick, angling around him to open it again.

"LiveJournal, Jim? You never told me you had a journal. Is that like MySpace, or something?"

Dwight made a face. "LiveJournal is for noobs. Everyone who knows anything these days has their own blog on their own host."

"And why is that?" Jim asked, managing to close the window while Karen was distracted.

"Customization. Lack of censorship. No advertisements. It also shows that you have computer skills beyond that of a labrat." Dwight's mouth quirked up. "I suppose you probably use AOL as your internet provider as well?"

"No," Jim said, suddenly indignant. "And besides -- I only use LJ because my friends use it and it's how we keep in touch."

"What friends?" Karen asked, giving Jim a look. "I thought all your friends lived around here. Why would you need to keep in touch with people who live, at most, five miles away?"

"That's not -- look, I don't want to talk about it," Jim said. "I have -- other friends -- online."

"Hm," Dwight said, suddenly interested. "What's your fandom? Harry Potter? Lord of the Rings? Veronica Mars?" He snickered to himself at that last one. "Kristen Bell is pretty hot, though," he said to himself, rubbing his chin.

"No," Jim said, "I don't have a 'fandom.'" Jim made air quotes. "And even if I did -- well -- it would be too dangerous to reveal, so..." He shrugged.

"Right," Dwight said, rolling his eyes. "It's probably something stupid, like Farscape."

"That was a good show," Karen said.

"Right -- if you enjoy Muppets in Space," Dwight smirked. "Battlestar Galactica is superior in every way."

"Sure," Jim said. "If you get basic cable it is. Obviously, you don't have access to the programming I do ..." Jim trailed off. "Oh, darn, I said too much already."

"Don't try to convince me that you have access to some super-secret satellite or something, Jim. I know you're lying," Dwight said, standing up out of his chair to glare at Jim.

Jim didn't reply, but made a zipping motion across his lips. He got up and headed towards the conference room.

===

"Dwight's right. I really don't have a secret satellite or anything like that. It will, however, keep Dwight wondering all day. Which ... is pretty much all I was hoping for. That, and keeping Karen distracted from the fact that I have a LiveJournal."

Jim sighed.

===

"I can't believe Jim keeps a blog ... you think he would have told me that, right? How does LiveJournal work, anyway? Is it like MySpace where you have all these 'friends' who leave slutty pictures on your page? That is so..." Karen thought for a second, "... dumb. Jim and I are going to have a talk about this later, I think."

===


Deleted Scene # 2: Michael and Jan make up!


Michael leaned back in his chair. “I think Jan and I have a good relationship. I mean, yeah, I was a little mad at her on the way back from the cocktail party - when she said she didn’t want our relationship to go public. I don’t understand that. I want to shout it on the rooftops! I want the world to know that Jan is my woman!" Michael paused for a moment. "Hm."

He stood up and went to the doorway of his office. "Um -- attention everyone -- I just wanted to remind everyone quickly, that I am in love with Jan!"

"Wow," Jim said, turning around. "I think you just announced that five minutes ago."

"Okay, then," Michael said, smiling. "I just... didn't want anyone to forget."

"I'm glad," Pam said, "because Jan's on the phone." She held the phone receiver up for Michael to see.

"Oh, well -- good," Michael said. He gave the camera a terse smile. "Send it over!"

Michael dashed back to his desk, punching the "speaker" button.

"Michael," a clipped voice came over the speaker. "Um, I sort of overheard you saying something to the office -- and it sounded like my name was in it."

"Yes, Jan, I was just ... reminding the office that I am in love with you."

"Reminding them," Jan said.

"I am not afraid of letting our love be known. I'm so proud of it -- I want to shout it on the rooftops. Scream from the mountains. Decry from the highways..."

"Um, okay," Jan said. "Look, Michael, I appreciate your ... um, enthusiasm, but, I just worry about what you are and aren't telling everyone. Like... you know, about what happens when we're not at work." She said the last part very quietly.

"If you asking whether I talk about our sex life, the answer is no," Michael said. He shot a grin to the camera. "Well, you know, except for Packer, but I only talked about it once, and only because he wouldn't leave me alone--"

"Packer?" Jan asked. "As in, Todd Packer?"

"Yes, but, you know. He's good. We're tight. Best buds. Secrets are sealed."

"Like an open book," Jan muttered. "Look, Michael -- I just --"

"I love you, Jan."

"I..." There was a long pause on the line. "Am I on speakerphone?" she asked.

"Um, yesh," Michael said. He glanced at the camera again.

"Okay, well, look -- let's -- I'm going to need to see you later this week. To meet on, um -- business matters."

"Right," Michael said. He winked. "Um, well ... coming to my condo is probably not going to work out, considering that my bed was, um, en fuego this morning."

"What? Is this one of your little idioms? What does that mean? You aren't, um ... I mean, I thought we were mutual, and ..." Jan trailed off.

"What?" Michael asked. He suddenly realized what Jan was suggesting: "Oh, no, no, no... Jan, we are in love. There is no one else except for you. You are my sun and moon and stars." The line was silent for several seconds. Michael continued, "Um, I mean. My bed actually caught on fire. Today. This morning."

"It -- what? How?"

"Well, the Wake-n-Bacon malfunctioned, or something, I mean, I don't know..."

"I told you that thing was a fire hazard."

"It's not my fault you have a thing against bacon."

"It's just fattening -- and -- it makes me sick to my stomach, which I am already, so --" She sighed loudly. "Look, I have to go. I'll ... talk to you later about this, okay?"

"Okay, Jan. I love you!"

There was an unintelligible mumbling on the line.

"What was that?"

"I said... well, you know what I said. Goodbye, Michael." The line clicked.

Michael frowned at the camera. "I really don't know what she said. Hm. That's what she didn't say?" Michael made a face. "That's what she said, that I couldn't hear?" He shook his head. "I'm going to have to work on that one."



Deleted Scene # 3: There's a rumble in the parking lot


Stanley was on one of his usual morning walkabouts when he noticed Karen go running past him and out the door. A couple seconds earlier, he'd seen Jim go running past, but hadn't really thought anything of it. He figured it had something to do with Michael at first (when didn't it?) but now he suspected something had happened between Karen and Jim. Not that it was any of his business. He thought Jim was still an immature kid, anyway. It was never a good idea to date people you worked with. Especially at Dunder-Mifflin. Working here was bad enough, but then having to go home to the person you worked with? No way.

About twice a day, he'd get up from his desk after making a few of his "pretend to do work" obligatory sales calls (these "calls" were mostly acquaintances that he already did business with. They'd talk about the kids, the upcoming church picnics, and the ridiculous cost of private schools these days. Sometimes he'd actually get an order out of it, and then he'd treat himself by doing a crossword puzzle for the next fifteen minutes. But usually, it was just idle conversation to pass the time. Most of what he did at Dunder-Mifflin felt into that category.) These walkabouts were a way to remind him that he wasn't literally chained to his desk for eight hours, and gave him an opportunity to check the weather outside, even maybe see the sun once in a while.

Today, he was thinking about taking a gander down to the third floor to see if they maybe had a Zagnut bar in the vending machine. He'd mentioned to the vending machine guy (Steve? Scott? Something like that) that they needed to get some of those, but it had been three weeks, and nothing. Maybe someone around here was actually getting some service, because Dunder-Mifflin sure wasn't.

He glanced out the window. It was a clear day outside. The type of clear day that was almost deceptive in nature -- making you think it was a lot warmer than it was. The type of day that makes you think, I could be golfing right now, but then you'd step outside for lunch, and the cold would hit you immediately, reminding you why you're wearing three layers and a wool coat. It was days like today that Stanley thought about packing up everything and just starting over in Florida. If it wasn't for Terri (her family all lived in the area), he probably would do that.

As he was staring out the window, he started to notice something weird. Jim was sitting on the bench right outside the front entrance. He could see this from the window in the front hall, right outside the main door into the office. It wasn't weird until Roy waked up, when it suddenly became apparent that there wasn't such a friendly situation going on outside. Stanley shook his head, heading back into the office. Not his place to get involved.

"Looks like there's a rumble in the parking lot," he mumbled, heading back to his desk.

"Rumble?" Dwight asked, jumping up. He immediately ran out the door to the window. "Oh my God!" Dwight said, propping the office door back open. "Roy and Jim are going at it!"

"Roy?" Pam asked, jumping up. "Oh ... my God, no..." She ran out the door without even putting her coat on.

Stanley shook his head. That's what you got for getting involved with people you work with. You lost all your common sense.

===