It’s the most embarrassing and awful thing she’s ever seen and it is the first thing to meet her eyes when she steps through the office doors the Monday after the day at the beach.  Stretched out across the front of her reception desk is a hideous banner featuring multiple photo-copies of her security badge photo and the phrase “Wham Bam Thank You Pam” in huge, orange letters. She thinks there are streamers….and balloons and oh god…..Michael is wearing a red, one-piece women’s bathing suit (apparently over a pair of shorts, thank God!) and the wig Oscar wore for Halloween a few years ago. Everyone else is refusing to make eye-contact with her. She should have followed Karen’s lead and not come in today.

“Michael---what?”  That’s all she can get out because seriously….she has no words.

“It’s Pam-preciation day. Today, Pam….it’s all about you.”

“You didn’t have to…..that’s not what I wanted…..Michael….what exactly …?” She gestures at Michael’s getup.

He beams with pride and hooks his thumbs under the straps of his swimming suit. “I’m Pamela Anderson…the most famous Pam of all time. I tried to get everyone to dress up like other Pams….Pamela Sue Martin, Pam Grier….that would have been perfect for Stanley….but nobody answered their phones this weekend, so it was all up to me and to Ryan.” It’s at this point that she notices that Ryan is wearing one of Kelly’s pink cardigans. She stifles a giggle as Michael continues. “We just wanted you to know, Pam, that I…..we appreciate you.” Pam is a little touched and at the same time thankful that Michael resisted the opportunity to point out how close she had been to becoming Pam Anderson herself.

“Um….thanks, but really this isn’t necessary.” In all of the craziness of her first minutes in the door, she hasn’t even had time to look for Jim, to see if he had the good sense to stay home today. He’s there, though, sitting at his desk. His back is to reception and his phone is cradled against his ear. He’s doodling on a pricelist in front of him and is totally unfazed by the commotion around him.  His avoidance skills are outstanding, but she gets it. She did a pretty bang-up job of avoiding him last year after he--- she doesn’t want to think about that….she did enough of that this weekend.

After leaving the parking lot on Friday night, she drove around for a while. She thought a lot about destiny and fate and all those other words that get thrown around a lot in the soaps that Karen kept mentioning. Back when she was with Roy, she thought that that she had a pretty good handle on where her life was going…what she was meant to be. ..who she was destined to be with. This year has changed that….changed her. She realized that she had taken the final step back at the beach. Sitting on the sidelines, cooking 800 hotdogs, she couldn’t imagine that her life would change that night. But it did in just a few minutes. She had walked across the coals and found acceptance. Acceptance not from her coworkers or from Jim. She had learned that she had to accept that her future was unknown and that sometimes it was okay to not have everything figured out.

 She knows now that what will happen….will happen.  Whether or not Karen follows through on her determination to break up with Jim….and if Jim ever speaks to her again….she can handle it. She had put it all out there. She had done her part. There were no balls in her court. She was free and in a way….this party really was a celebration of sorts.

Two hours later, after a Michael Scott Joint that basically featured shots of her answering the phone and a reading from Pamela Des Barres’ book about being a rock groupie (Dwight had chosen to interpret the Jeff Beck chapter with the whips and…..ugh) she’s in the conference room sipping a Pam-tini. It tastes like spiked strawberry lemonade and it’s actually pretty good.

She’s leaning up against the table thinking that she should thank Angela for throwing this together on such short notice when Phyllis approaches her.

“Pam, honey….I just wanted to say that I’m sorry…..”

“Phyllis, it’s okay….really. You’ve always been a friend and really.”

Phyllis throws her arms around Pam and crushes her in a hug. “I was so proud of you…what you said. Bob Vance got sick of me telling him about it this weekend, but you were amazing.”

“Thanks.” Before Phyllis breaks her hug she leans in and whispers in her ear. “This was Jim’s idea you know?”

“What? I thought Michael…”

“Oh….not this hideous party, but when we got back from the trip to the beach and everyone was in the parking lot….I think you were still upstairs dealing with the hot dogs….Jim just suggested that we all chip in to buy you some flowers or something to show that we appreciate you and the things you do for us in here in the office. I thought it was very sweet….especially after you reamed him out. Michael decided that a party would be soooo much better than some flowers.” Pam thinks she’s starting to blush. She wonders for a second if Karen had heard Jim’s suggestion and whether or not it fueled the conversation they had had. She doesn’t care.

Phyllis wanders off and Pam drinks down the last of her Pam-tini. As she leaves the conference room, she looks up and makes eye-contact with Jim for the first time that day. He has the same look on his face as he did back at the fire. She smiles slightly as she passes his desk on the way back to reception. “Hey….um…thanks for this. Phyllis told me it was your idea.”

“Oh….no problem.”  He breaks the eye-contact and picks up the phone to make another call. Pam begins to think that maybe the only positive outcome of her speech will be Jim winning the award for top salesman.

The party begins to wind down, though Michael has promised a big surprise for a late lunch and takes off for the warehouse. One-by-one her coworkers seek her out to offer her a word of praise or appreciation. Angela tells her that her public spectacle was embarrassing, but she squeezes Pam’s arm and looks a little jealous. She notices Creed telling Meredith she’s an asset to the office while giving her a creepy hug. Things just might be beginning to approach normal again. Things are going back to the way they were.

To underscore that notion, Pam spends the rest of the morning looking at the back of Jim’s neck. He’s been hunched over for the last half hour, scribbling something, then crossing it out….then scribbling again. When she gives up trying to figure out what he’s up to, she opens up her Solitaire program and loses herself in the game….until she hears his throat clear.

He’s leaning against her desk like he used to….before…..

“So, ah….Michael’s lunch? That he’s making right now in the warehouse?”

“What about it?” She looks up at him. There’s a very slight smile at the corners of his mouth and for the first time in a long time, there’s some spark in his eyes.

“SPAM Pam-ini sandwiches.”

“Oh, that sounds awful!”

“I didn’t tell you the best part. He’s using the George Foreman.”

She groans and he hands her a yellow sticky note and walks back to his desk. She looks down at it and smiles. It’s been a while since she’s gotten a note in his cramped, boyish handwriting and this one is perfect.

            “Friends don’t let friends eat feet”

She puts the sticky note on her computer screen and smiles. This has been a weird couple of days. Michael is in the warehouse grilling up Spam while wearing a wig, Creed and Meredith are making out in the kitchen, Phyllis is tipsy and Jim…..Jim….well, maybe he’s had to walk through his own fire too.