The restaurant is slowly filling up, but luckily, Jim manages to land us a little two-seater booth off to the side. Chester’s is a small family restaurant on the outskirts of Scranton, he tells me, so I’m guessing it’s safe to say the chances of running into anyone we know is slim. It’s small, alright. It’s certainly got the family-friendly feel to it, I guess, since I’m hearing lots of kids shrieking and laughing. Jim excuses himself, squeezing my hand before he gets up and heads to the restrooms, but not before pointing them out in case I should need to go before he gets back. He knows how I hate to ask for help.

Fortunately, I’m fine at the moment. I’m taking this opportunity to scan the restaurant…It’s nice. Lots of pretty young girls out front, waitressing. A handsome young man tending the bar on the other side of the restaurant. The walls are littered with local sports teams, mostly high-school and little-league. It’s pretty dark, and I think if it didn’t have such a nice layout, it’d be a lot less tolerable. Not that I can’t stand it…I think I might really like it, but I’m not committing to that – not until I know how the food is.

There are individual hanging lamps over each table and booth, giving off a soft yellow-orange glow that covers just the right area. Each cover has a different design on it, and it’s not something that’s pressed or printed on.

I’ve got to remember to check ours on the way out.

"This place makes a mean turkey BLT, if you’re going to chicken out and have a sandwich." Jim’s peering at me over the wall beside our booth, laughing.

"Chicken out? Are you challenging me, Halpert?"

"You catch on quick." He slides around and sits across from me, shooting me a sly smile. "You in?"

"Hmm…Nah. I’m not up for total embarrassment tonight, thanks." He makes a pouty face at me and whines like a puppy. I’m trying, and failing miserably, to hide my laughter behind my menu.

"Hi, y’all! Welcome to Chester’s. I’m Sandy, your waitress tonight. What can I get ya?" She’s sure…peppy. Platinum blonde hair tied back in a ponytail, her bangs covering her forehead…Probably my height. Her assets are all but jumping out of her shirt. The way she’s looking at Jim, I’m scared if she were to escape that two-sizes-too-small shirt, the wonder twins might go straight for his face.

She’s smiling and telling Jim about the special tonight. She tells him he looks very handsome and continues to smile in his direction. Jim, however, never takes his eyes off of me, so she finally lets me order: a Chester Burger, medium-rare with fries and a Coke.

Jim also notices that I’ve apparently never seen this Sandy lady before, and that only seems to add to his mischievous smile.

"And for you, hon?" She turns to back to Jim. I’m seriously considering jumping over this table and taking her down. I think I could take her. I can see myself on top of her, Jim cheering me on. He’d hand me a knife, and I’d deflate both her airbags in one swift move. I hear Jim’s order and notice his expression.

"Same, but extra fries and…" He looks at me with a begging look in his eyes, and I simply shrug.

"I’ll drive, but if you end up plastered I’m leaving you here and keeping your car."

"Ouch...Well, that settles it. I’ll have a coke, too." He smiles up at her and I’m burning with jealousy, even though I know it’s the same smile he flashes at Kelly. This woman is oblivious to our seemingly obvious discomfort, and squeezes Jim’s shoulder on the way past our booth, flashing an angry look at me.

"She wants you." It always amazes me how he can say such ridiculous things and keep such a straight face.

"Oh, yeah. That’s why she couldn’t even look my direction."

He shakes his head and crosses his arms on the table. "You’re just too much for some of us to handle."

"That’s what she said," I laugh. I’m vowing to never let myself be glad to see Sandy again after this moment. She’s bringing our cokes and still glaring at me. The cokes are cool, they come in the old-fashioned glass bottles. I hand mine to Jim and ask him to open it for me, batting my eyes and biting my lower lip. She coughs.

"Oh...We didn’t realize you were still here." Jim tells her flatly, a questioning look in his eyes.

She walks away without saying anything, and I stupidly assume I’m free to have a conversation with my date.

My cheeks are burning with that thought. My date. I’m on a date with Jim Halpert. Officially. Tonight, he’s mine.

She steps back towards our table, and smiles at Jim, rambling about something or other. She stops to scowl at me some more and mentions she forgot to ask about an appetizer. Jim reaches his arm out and takes my hand, squeezing as he tells her we’re okay for now while staring in my eyes and smiling. I can tell he’s growing impatient, quickly, with her.

She makes the excuse that she needs to check the ketchup bottle on our table, but smacks my hand with it when she drags it back to her.

Jim releases my hand and sits back, arms folded, giving her an intense look. This girl is about to find out just how unpleasant Angry Jim can be. She says it’s fine, and slams it back down in place. He cocks his head and looks at her as though she were deformed. I have to raise a hand and cover my mouth to stifle my laughter because, for the first time in a long time, Angry Jim isn’t directed at me, and I know what she’s in for.

"Well, can I get y’all any appetizers?" She says with what’s got to be a completely fake Southern accent, smiling at him.

"Um, no, but I would like to ask you a question." She leans in and smiles at him. "Could you stop being a bitch to my date?" She steps back, obviously offended, and he starts to correct himself. "Oh, oh-oh-oh-oh-ohh, I didn’t mean to – hey, you know, if you want me to apologize to your boss or supervisor or whatever…I’m sorry, I know it must be hard for someone with your…talents…to get this sort of rejection, but I’m just not into blondes." He pats her shoulder and gives her a very forced sympathetic look.

He winks at me and she’s glaring again. I swear, I might strangle her. She turns to walk away and mumbles something under her breath. "Some people…" he says quietly.

He’s still smiling at me, watching me think.

I pick up my drink and try not to laugh hysterically as he smiles suggestively at me. Something about that smile is contagious.

I take a sip and wonder what’s on his mind. He’s smiling and staring at me, almost the way my father used to do before he told me I was nearly as beautiful as my mother.

"I know neither of us wants to talk about it, but it needs to be done. Everything needs to be said and I don’t think if we wait," I pause and take a deep breath. "If we wait, I don’t think either of us will be able to fully relax and just be ourselves. Be happy."

He thinks for a moment, and nods. "I’m happy, though. I mean, I’m feelin’ pretty good tonight.

"So am I," I tell him; "I just…I need to know as many things as I need to tell you. And believe me I know this is probably the worst time and place but I really can’t wait, I want a completely clean slate and a chance, and I feel like for that to happen…" I take a deep breath.

"For that to happen, we need to know…everything."

"Alright. Where do we start?"

"What’re you doing here, Jim? You realize you’re number two in Scranton? Scranton. And I really don’t want you to throw yourself in front of a train."

So he tells me. He tells me how great the interview went, and how he had felt after he turned it down. He tells me how Karen was just not right. "I mean, she was right for Corporate Jim. Jim-who-wanted-to-move-up-in-Dunder-Mifflin-Jim," and how he doesn’t want to be that Jim. And he tells me the ultimatum he was given: "New York, fancy dinners, never having to drive, and a big, spacious apartment with [Karen], or a one-horse town full of no-bodies going nowhere." And he tells me how, when he felt himself getting mad, he just walked away. "She had to know…If she…She knows now, anyway. I wanted to tell her that you guys…We’re not 'no-bodies.' It sounded too cliché, though. So…I just…told her goodbye."

His side takes about ten minutes. "Your turn," he prompts in between large gulps of his soda. "Why are you here?"

And I tell him. I tell him that, to understand why I’m here, he has to understand everything else. I’m spilling everything, I decide. How, yes, okay, I can say all I want that I cancelled my wedding because Jim Halpert opened my eyes to how wrong Roy was for me, but every time, it’s going to be a lie…or a half-truth, some would call it. And I tell him how I thought of calling and writing and…anything to bring some sort of smile to my face, but didn’t because I was scared he hated me, and it seemed selfish to do it just so I could smile.

And I suddenly feel very selfish…I never called, never e-mailed…That’s certainly not to say I didn’t try to get in touch with him. I was scared. I wasn’t scared he hated me…I was scared he’d reject me. And…After I rejected him, maybe I deserved that.

"Pam…?" He leans forward in his seat. He’s really registering everything I’m saying. I can’t read his face, and I’m scared. I’m so fucking scared. I wipe a stray tear from my cheek and finish. He needs to know. I need to admit it. Maybe if I say it out loud, it will feel…real.

"I kept thinking…‘If something happened to Jim, I’d find out through Michael or Jan or some random person who means nothing to me, or to him. Or worse, maybe that random person would’ve meant everything to him, everything I had the chance to mean.’ And I didn’t…I don’t want that. And then I’d scold myself for days, just telling myself that you left because I was stupid, and you weren’t stupid. You wouldn’t let anything happen to you. When I heard you were coming back, I didn’t know what to think other than, ‘He’s okay. We’ll be okay.’" I pause and take a sip of my soda. "But we weren’t. And now we’re here and I’m still not sure if we’re okay but if nothing else ever becomes of this I just want that. I just want us to be okay."

My side takes about ten minutes. Wow, I got through that without bawling.

He reaches up and wipes the lone tear from his cheek. I look down, hands in my lap. I feel better, having said and heard all of that, but I still can’t read his face.

And I’ve never been so scared.

"Maybe that was bad timing…" I look up, but he’s not there, and that sends my heart into my stomach.

He left. He disappeared again. I don't know why I do this to myself over and over, he's just going to keep running and I'll stupidly keep chasing...

"Pam."

He’s next to me. Kneeling. He pulls my face close to his and kisses me like he’ll never get to again. He smiles and goes back to his seat just as the food’s arriving.

Sandy saw us kiss.

"Well, I, for one, feel much better." He smiles.