Pam rested her elbow on her desk, her chin in her hand, and stared at her computer. She couldn’t remember the last time a day had gone by so slowly. No calls, only a couple faxes, and plenty of time to think. Think about how much Karen had been smiling today, and how many glances she had seen her steal with Jim. Think about that lime green bra and panty set she had seen Karen buy at Victoria’s Secret, and how she had bought an oversized bathrobe. Like it was any wonder why he left the office with her every day at 5.

How could she compete? Maybe she should start tanning, or jogging after work, or something. Ugh, what was the point? Jim had moved on, obviously. Karen was like Katy, but with an IQ. She was prettier, more put together, and just plain better than her. She didn’t stand a chance.

Still, it wasn’t like any of that changed how she felt about him. She loved him, was in love with him, and more than anything she just wanted to look him in the eye and tell him that. Tell him that she missed him. Missed his smile, his laugh, the way that he could look at her with such amusement one minute, and such passion the next. How she could be a complete kid with him but a woman as well.

Pam sighed deeply into her fingers. She knew she had to stop thinking like this. For ten years with Roy she had belittled herself and ignored what she wanted. Lately, she had been doing better with believing in herself. For the first time, she was starting to picture herself as independent and strong. Her sketchpad was filling up, along with her diary, and she had bought an easel for her apartment. Still, it wasn’t like she hadn’t made mistakes along the way.

She had really screwed up by going back with Roy. God, that was stupid. The look on Jim’s face in the break room when she had tried to apologize…it haunted her. She still turned it over in her mind most nights. She didn’t know what to do, everything was so confusing, so messed up. So---

Poof! Pop!

Pam froze at the sound. What the hell was that? She turned in her chair and looked around for its origin, but didn’t see anything out of place.

“Over here Pam!”

Pam raised her eyebrows at what sounded like her own voice. She turned to where she thought the sound was coming from…her right shoulder. She gasped at what she saw.

Sitting in a little office chair, exactly like her own, was…what exactly? It looked like a smaller version of her, complete with the outfit that she was wearing today. A pink cardigan, a buttoned up striped shirt, a knee-high skirt, and black flats. She was waving her hand quickly back and forth.

“What the hell are you?” Pam panicky exclaimed.

"Whoa! Not out loud Pam! Do you want everyone to think you’re a crazy person? I’m a manifestation of your unconscious…so just think what you want to ask me.” The tiny Pam crossed her arms and looked up.

Pam’s eyes widened until she couldn’t make them any larger. She closed her eyes and concentrated in thought. “What the hell are you? Am I hallucinating? Am I…”

“Relax Pam, I’m here to help you, ok? I’m Angel, your conscience.” Angel paused in what looked like thought. “Let me put it another way. I’m like Jiminy Cricket. Remember when we saw Pinocchio? I think we were seven…I can’t remember now. Anyway, you’ve got a problem big enough that we decided that staying in your head wasn’t going to cut it.”

Pam blinked for the first time since she had seen…Angel. She squinted in concentration again. “What do you mean by we?”

“Pam! I’m here too.”

Pam turned to the source of the new sound, which also sounded like her voice, and looked at her left shoulder. Sitting there was, again, another miniature version of her. This time however, something was definitely different. The left shoulder Pam wasn’t wearing the cardigan, just the buttoned up striped shirt and the top two buttons were undone. Her skirt was shorter, more like mid-thigh, and she was wearing heels. Plus, Pam squinted to try to look closer….were her boobs higher?

The other little Pam smiled up at her. “If you’re done taking me in, let me introduce myself, I’m Devil. Think of me as a representative of what your unconscious really wants and Angel as what you should want. I’m like your Id, but Freud was a sexist pig, so lets not call me that. Anyway, like Angel said, you’ve got problems so we decided to take a field trip.” Devil paused and cocked an eyebrow at her.

“Wait a minute…if you’re my Id, and Angel is my conscience or whatever, then what is the part of me that is thinking right now?” Pam thought.

“Well that’s you too Pam. See, Devil and I represent your unconscious. You think with what you’re using right now, your conscious mind. Freud called it the Ego, but Devil is right, he was kind of patronizing to women. Anyway, we just call it Pam. Devil and I just kind of let you, or Pam, do things on your own, and occasionally give input. Push you a little that way or this way. The point is, we’ve manifested ourselves into your consciousness because you need a big push.”

Pam was still completely confused. “Is this because of that intro psych course I took the first semester of college?” she pondered.

“Well, that didn’t help things. It’s also why we have to use really hazy details of Freud.”

Pam took in a sharp breath. “Why are you each on one of my shoulders?”

“Oh that was my idea. We’ve seen it in so many movies and TV shows. It’s kinda cliché I know, but it works so we went for it.”

Pam shook her head, trying to get whatever this was out of her sight. “Am I seeing you because I’ve been drinking more lately?” she thought.

“No, this isn’t from the drinking Pam. Though you really should slow down on that. Devil and I agree that you angrily yelling Thelma Houston at two in the morning is kinda undignified.”

Devil nodded. “Yeah, we found a middle ground on that one.”

“Still, we’re here to help. We’re tired of running around like we’re on a hamster wheel over this whole thing.” Angel looked pleadingly up at Pam.

“Pam, as representatives of your unconscious, please realize that you’re frying us. You’re so much stronger now than you once were, you gotta do something!”

Pam looked quizzically at Devil, she opened her mouth to speak and then remembered what Angel had said. Instead, she asked herself, “what are you two talking about? What problem?”

Angel looked stunned, and leaned to look around Pam’s neck at Devil. “What problem Pam? If you can’t admit to yourself what the problem is, then we can’t help you figure this out…like, literally.”

Devil was far blunter. “It’s about Jim, Pam. The guy that you’re in love with, that we’re in love with. The guy you spent twenty minutes the other day wondering whether or not your children’s hair would be curly or straight? Don’t worry though, I’ve got a plan for all of us.”

“No you don’t Devil. Your plan is not us, its not what we do.” Angel looked indignant as she pawed at the sleeves of her cardigan.

“Angel, your plans kept us with Roy for ten years because you wanted to be ‘responsible’ and ‘dependable’. You suck! Seriously, I’ve been right about Jim this whole time.”

Pam looked over at Devil and frowned. “What do you mean?” she asked.

“I mean…think about the honey dream.”

Pam blushed immediately. The honey dream, how could she forget it? She usually forgot about dreams five seconds after waking up, but this one in particular she had had over three years ago, and still remembered every detail.

She was in a bedroom on some tropical island. The warm breeze blew through the window and the white sheer curtains flowed with it. Jim was on the bed, sprawled out and completely naked. She was straddling him, wearing only a white bra and panty set. A thin strip of honey was spread from his navel to his Adam’s apple. Slowly she leaned over him, so that her breasts softly ran against his chest. Then she curved her tongue into a U, and deliberately ran her tongue the entire length of his chest, collecting the honey in her mouth. Resting her ass on his chest, she reached down to his face, only a couple inches away from his mouth, and slowly let the honey run from her mouth to his. Then she sealed the transfer with a long and passionate kiss, one that made her taste the honey all over again.

The vivid imagery of the dream made Pam hot all over, and she felt a drop of sweat quickly slide from her hairline down her cheek.

“That was all me Pam! I sketched that whole dream for you. I was trying to tell you that Jim was the right choice.” Devil smiled contently.

Pam shut out the voice and thought again of Jim’s chest. The heat that her skin was giving off was more then matched by the heat inside of her. Her stomach was tightening involuntarily.

“Pam?”

She closed her eyes hard and bit her bottom lip until it was numb between her front and bottom teeth. She pulled herself closer to the desk, and leaned her head down on it.

“Whoa Pam! Not here! Stop!”

Images of honey, chest hair, and lips hit her over and over again. She let out a shuttered breath.

“Not at work! Devil do something!”

“I say we let her ride it out. We need this. You know we do Angel. The last time was with Roy after the wedding, and you made us cry afterwards.”

“No we’ll regret this later. PAM!” Angel was hopping up and down on her right shoulder.

Pam stopped. She looked over at Angel, her concentration broken. She swallowed hard and picked her head up from the Reception desk.

“See what I’m saying Pam? That was just from a dream, that’s three years old! Imagine…”

Angel interrupted, “No! Don’t imagine anything more Pam. Stop listening to Devil! That’s where all this lust and sex stuff comes from. You’re acting like a sixteen year old swooning over the captain of the football team or something. Do you think Jim’s love for us was built on sex dreams? Of course not, it was so much deeper than that.”

“Whoa Angela! Nobody said that our love for Jim wasn’t deep, but part of that is wanting to rip his belt off, tie his hands behind his chair with it, and give him blisters on his thighs.” With that Devil smirked and nodded to Pam.

Pam looked wide-eyed back at Devil. Her bottom lip, which still held bite marks in it, quivered slightly. “I-I-I’m going to the bathroom and put some water on my face, I think” she said to herself.

“Good plan. When you walk by Jim, turn and smile at him.”

“No don’t. Karen will see you and things will get messier between everyone. Just don’t make eye contact until we’ve figured this whole thing out.”

Pam got up from her seat and turned the corner around Reception. She wondered when things were going to start to get less confusing.