They stared at each other in silence. He leaned up against the wall next to the elevator, with his palms flat up against it to support himself. She stood, arms wrapped around herself, with the card delicately held between two fingers.

Between them wasn’t just a week’s worth of unsaid thoughts, but an entire friendship’s worth of unspoken feelings. At least, that’s how it was on his side, but he couldn’t worry about that now. He had to focus on getting back to where they had been, and forget about anything more than that.

Because, as he looked at her now, hesitancy written all over her face, but the tantalizing shadow of a smile still on her lips, he knew it couldn’t stay like this. He didn’t want to go another day in the hazy purgatorial-like existence he’d been living in the office, only feet away from a constant reminder how much better it could be. How much happier he could be.

“Pam, I---”

Just then, the clatter of footsteps and broken conversation echoed all around them. The tension was broken and their eyes parted. It was 5:00, and everyone was leaving the office. They were about to round the corner, and come upon them…

“Jim, you forgot to sign the bottom of that sales agreement, come back to the office so we can do that.” She said it in what seemed like one breath, one burst and release of anxiety.

Years of quick thinking and pranking prepared him to act along almost instantly, despite the heat rushing from his neck to his face at her words. “Thanks, Pam. I totally forgot about that. Yeah, let’s go back and do that.” By now Stanley, Kevin, and Oscar were walking past Pam. None of them noticed their act.

She turned around and walked slowly back towards the office, shoulders almost parallel to the wall to let her co-workers pass her. She glanced back quickly at him, making sure that he was following her, before her eyes returned forward.

He had no idea what she was going to say, really. He had his hopes, of course, but the fact that she was willing to talk was all he wanted. He knew he could make this right, if she’d only let him.

It suddenly occurred to him, as he re-entered the office, that they probably wouldn’t have much time to talk, if any. It was Valentine’s Day after all, and even though he noticed Roy hadn’t gotten her anything, he was sure that he’d be up to get up her soon enough.

She didn’t stop at Reception, but kept on walking, past Dwight’s desk, and towards the break room. He looked around and saw that only Angela was still at her desk, and she was impatiently tapping her foot as her computer shut down. Pam was already through the doors when he looked back.

-----

He took a small, sharp breath before he went in. He had wanted this, had planned towards this, but that didn’t settle his nerves. As he entered, he saw that she was already sitting down, her hands in her lap, and her eyes wandering around the room.

“Hey” she said softly.

“Hey” he responded from somewhere deep in his throat.

“Um….so this card.” She picked it up off the table, and held it. Even from where he was standing, he could see the orange of Dwight’s hat on the front of it. But as he strode over to her, and sat down opposite of her at the table, the beets, scarf, and smile all become clearer. Even though he had seen it so many times he had lost count, he laughed a little.

His laugh became hers, and she turned the front of the card, and the picture, to face her. She cocked an eyebrow at him, and smiled slyly.

“Is this why Dwight put a beet on your desk last week?”

Her tone washed over him, and he let himself relax a little. “I think it’s related, yeah….oh, I’m sorry, are you jealous that Dwight gave me a beet?”

She leaned forward slightly, her necklace dangled a little, but he fought to keep his eyes on hers. “I think if Dwight ever gave me a beet, I would freak out.”

“What about a mauve scarf? I think that would, uh…” he had to stop himself, and what he wanted to say. Instead he continued to work back into their dynamic, that one he had missed so much. “…I mean, Dwight told me it helps control his” he raised his hands for air quotes, “uh, ‘unchecked virility’.”

Pam scrunched up her nose and forehead at his words, and he fell a little more in love with her. She squinted through her words, “that was the most disturbing air quotes, ever Jim. Promise me that you’ll never air quote creepy Dwight, uh well, Dwight in general to me, ever again.”

He held up his hand in surrender. “I promise Pam. I’ll remember that when it comes to Dwight’s unchecked virility you don’t want to hear about it. The, uh, unchecked virility, I mean.”

“Stop saying it!” Her tongue darted out of her mouth for just a second in disgust, and her hands flew in front of her, trying to physically get the image out of her head.

They both sat with slowly fading smiles as the silence came back to them. A reminder that they weren’t right yet, that their friendship still needed more repairing.

She spoke first. “Um, actually it was what was on the inside of the card…” He could see her swallow hard, and her eyes fixate on the card, which she had opened.

“Yeah…” He wasn’t sure what to say, because he didn’t know what she was going to say. How she would react to what he had written inside. He had been careful this time. It wasn’t like Christmas, where he had been reckless, and had written his true feelings for her. Not that he had lied, either, it was just….he had phrased things different was all.

“I’ve never really, uh, I mean not never, but….” she punctuated her stuttering with a soft self-conscious chuckle, then continued, “….what I’m trying to say is, it’s been a long time….” Her eyes darted down to the carpet, and then back over to the card that she held below the table. “And, uh…I mean, when you said, ‘you’re my best friend, and it's your friendship that gets me through the day. I come to work and go home smiling because of you.’ That’s just….” He could see that her eyes were full, and tears threatened to run down her face.

He sucked up the discomfort at having her read his own words back to him, and reached out his hand across the table to get her attention. To his surprise, she grabbed it tightly. He hoped she didn’t feel the shock that ran through him at her touch, or see the lump that had slid down his throat, or noticed how his breathing had quickened. He struggled to speak.

“Pam, I didn’t want to make you cry. It’s just, I meant that, and I know that things have sucked between us lately. I..I don’t want that, I want to be able to talk to you, and to you know, hang out with you.” He felt dangerously close to crossing a line. That he might say too much, so he pulled back a little, “…you really are my best friend, and I want to go back to that. I know what I said about the…”

She cut him off, pulled her hand from his, and dabbed at the corners of her eyes with her knuckles. “No, Jim. This is my fault. I’ve been so stupid, and I….I was mad at Roy, you know?, about the whole art thing, and then I took it out on you….”

He couldn’t stand to let her blame herself, not entirely, because he knew it wasn’t true. “Pam, no, it’s….I think we both said some things, because we were angry, and I just….I want what’s best for you is all. I’m not trying to push you or anything, but I know how great you are, and how talented you are, and that you can have more then this if you want to.” He paused at his own words, the double meaning that blazed in them for him, but would surely be lost on her. He looked over at her, and hoped he hadn’t said too much.

She had suddenly become very still, her eyes wide and still wet. She looked down at the table, almost unblinkingly. “I know Jim, you’re….my best friend too. And I know, that’s what best friends do…they, uh, want what’s best for each other. I’m just…I’m sorry and it’s been killing me not talking to you for all this time.”

Her words sent a rush of warmness through his veins. It felt like his blood had been super-heated suddenly, and the warmth of his face was causing his vision to be watery as well. It was all he ever wanted from her, really. For her to feel the same way about him as he felt about her. Well, maybe she didn’t feel completely the same way, but the fact that she missed talking to him, and that she said he was her ‘best-friend’…..especially considering she was engaged…..well, it pushed him to make things completely right.

“I’m sorry too Pam. I do want what’s best for you, but I stepped out of line.” He paused, and considered what he should say next. They had both apologized, and he knew he should break the tension. “Not quite as out of line as putting a mauve scarf with a blaze orange hat, of course…”

She broke back into a smile, and any darkness in the room was blinked out of existence. “Oh my god! I know! This is seriously….I’ve got to get a frame for this. It’s so awesome. He should really start his own clothing line. Maybe start with Wal-Mart….”

He couldn’t resist. “I dunno Pam, I’m pretty sure even for Wal-Mart the Dwight Schrute Collection would be too trashy.”

She giggled, and held her hand to her mouth. “No, what if you paired it with some blue sweatpants?”

“Oh well. Yeah, as long as they’re blue. I mean red would just be…you know, lame.”

“Speaking of lame….”

“Oh no.”

“Oh yes, Jim. I’m going to talk to Michael and see what I can do about getting you ‘The Lamest Pun Dundie.”

“I thought you might like it….”

“Oh it’s great, you should definitely write Hallmark cards. But really….Beet Mine? I mean, it’s a good thing I kept reading.”

“Yeah, it is…” He didn’t mean to speak the words with such tenderness and softness, but his emotion betrayed him.

She blinked some of the wetness out of her eyes. “Yeah…” She looked up at the clock, and he did the same, it was 5:10. “Oh, I’ve got to get going, uh, Roy’s waiting so….but, really….thank you Jim. You have no idea how much this means to me.”

“No, I….yeah, but I’ll see you tomorrow right?” He felt his insides twist at her mention of Roy. That she was hurrying off to be with him. Leaving the guy who had spent a week just trying to get her friendship back, so that she could be with the guy who didn’t love her enough to even send her flowers. But, he checked that, swallowed it. Maybe there would a time for that, but it wasn’t here, and it wasn’t now.

She stood up and clutched his card to her chest. “Of course. And we’ve got a lot to talk about too, I’ll refill the jellybean jar.” She smiled at him, and walked towards the door. He turned to watch her leave, but she paused at the doorway and turned.

“Good night Jim. Happy Valentine’s Day.”

He smiled. “Good night Pam. Happy Valentine’s Day”