“Don’t take this the wrong way… but you should go for that job…”
Jim’s smile faded and Pam tried to convince him even more that he should go for the job.
“Yeah. Yeah,” Jim’s voice cracked, he hadn’t wanted it too but he couldn’t help it. He also couldn’t hide the disappointment in face and the slight movement he made with his head, “you know what, maybe, maybe I will.” His voice broke again and he left Pam at her desk. He heard her say his name after but he knew that if he looked at her his heart would break… again. Pam hadn’t meant to break his heart in that way. She heard the crack in his voice, it was the same sound she heard in movies when men were about to cry over a lost love, and she saw that he was disappointed. She never meant that she wanted him to leave; she just wanted what was best for him. The camera crew had caught the whole moment and before they had a chance to come over to her desk and catch her reaction up close she turned away and started organizing the file drawers. She didn’t want them seeing her cry silently.
After 10 minutes she had regained her composure and Jim had come back from the restroom. She saw that he had splashed water on his face because the hair around his ears was damp. As Jim made his way to his desk he brushed off the camera crew and they left him to follow Dwight into Michael’s office. They knew that whatever happened in that office would be fried gold, and they needed to capture it. After the door had closed behind Dwight Jim heard the chime of someone signing on to MSN. He glanced down and saw that it was Pam, before she could message him he put his status to appear offline. He didn’t want to talk about him transferring his heart was still bruised from before. He glanced up at her, and saw her face fall when she noticed that he had signed off. Pam had wanted to apologize, she knew that she didn’t want Jim to leave and that if he did, it would be the worst thing that would ever happen in her career.
Pam had no contact with Jim for the rest of the day, and when she had tried to ask him about what happened in Michael’s office he had just said that it wasn’t him, and brushed her off. He had actually walked back into the bathroom, take some deep breaths and to calm himself down after Pam had been so concerned about him. Jim returned to his desk, his mood only slightly elevated. His plan was he would sit and wait until the Halloween party started then he would make his quick exit and go home.
The Devon got fired and he invited everyone to Poor Richard’s. Jim liked Devon so he thought “what the hell, I’m not giving out candy this year so I’ll go.” Pam liked Devon too, so she was going to go too and she knew that Roy was going to his friend’s to play poker, so he wouldn’t care either way what she did. On his way out the door Pam stopped him. She apologized for pushing him to Cumberland-Mills, and she told him that she would probably kill herself if he left. He laughed at her joke, but he still hadn’t totally forgiven her.
Pam arrived at Poor Richard’s last because she had called Roy and left him a message about where she was going. When she got in she found the rest of the group. She sat down next to Kelly, and ordered a beer. She tried getting Jim’s attention, but he still seemed a little bitter from before. After two pints she was feeling a little more relaxed and joined in the conversation with Ryan and Kelly. She only half paid attention as she kept trying to get Jim’s attention. Jim was still a little bitter about before, and even though it hurt him to ignore Pam, it gave him a little pleasure to see her pining and feeling bad.
Pam had finished six pints and had just had her second Tequila Slammer when she saw Jim get up to go to the bathroom. She stood up to follow him, that’s when the alcohol hit her. She was more than just a little tipsy. She tried her best to walk over to the bathroom without falling. She made it and then leaned on the wall and waited for Jim to come out. Jim was surprised to see her standing there. He could tell that she had had one maybe two drinks too many.
“Hey there Beesly, You ok?”
“Yeah… no. Jim why won’t you talk to me?” She said it a little louder than she should have, so Jim moved her more into the little hallway that led to the bathrooms. He didn’t want her making a drunken scene in front of the bar.
“Pam. I’m sorry I was just still a little bitter that you would want me to go to Cumberland-Mills”
“Jim I never wanted you to go. I just thought that you should really have a better job. I was just trying to be a good friend.”
Tears had welled up in the corners of her eyes, being drunk always made Pam a little emotional. Jim felt bad so he gave her a huge hug. He heard her sniff his shirt, he pulled away and was about to laugh at her, and say that she was going to have to wash the black stain from her nose out of his shirt, when she reached up and kissed him. She kissed him hard and he kissed her back. She tasted like she did at the dundies, like alcohol with a sweet after taste. He pulled away after a couple seconds.
“Sorry. You just smelled Tide fresh and I couldn’t resist.”
“That’s ok Pam, but I think we should get you home. You are a little drunk.”
They walked back to the group, after Jim had checked to make sure that Pam’s nose wasn’t too smudged and there was no black on his face. She polished off the rest of her beer, and the tequila shot that Kelly had ordered for her. She hugged Kelly and Ryan bye, and waved to everyone else. Jim during that time had asked the bartender if it was ok if he could leave Pam’s car in the lot over night as he was taking her home because she was drunk, he said it was fine. Jim got back to Pam said goodnight to everyone and helped her out of the bar. It was close to 9pm, as Jim pulled out of the lot. As he was about to turn left to go to Pam’s house she looked up at him and asked, “Jim would you mind if I came to your place for a bit? It’s just that I hate being alone when I’m tipsy.”
Jim looked at her. There was something in her eyes. Longing, fear, lust, he didn’t know.
“It’s ok Pam, you can come. Mark’s gone for the weekend so we don’t have to worry about bothering him and girlfriend.”
Pam smiled and settled into her seat in Jim’s car. Jim turned right and headed to his house.
By the time they got to Jim’s house Pam was giggling and Jim was shaking his head at Pam. Jim parked the car, got out and then went around to help Pam out her side. As he helped her out she kind of stumbled, but he caught her. Their faces were inches apart, but Pam broke the moment by announcing that she had to pee, and then giggling. Jim laughed at her again and went to the front door. After he opened it Pam ran in to use the bathroom. Jim had said that it was upstairs and to the left. While Pam was in the bathroom Jim walked into the kitchen and grabbed two root beers. Just as he was about to open them he heard Pam’s voice call down to him.
“Hey Jim, do you have any clothes that I can borrow, this skirt and tights are really annoying.”
Jim stopped breathing Pam wanted to wear his clothes. It was too much of a shock. He knew that he had dreamed about her walking around in a pair of his boxers and his sweater after having sex. Those were his dreams and now they were coming true… well except the sex part he thought.
“Yeah sure Pam. Give me a second.”
Jim went into the laundry room grabbed a pair of gym shorts and grey sweater for Pam. He then made his way up the stairs. When he got to the bathroom he knocked and Pam’s had reached out for the clothes. As she took them their fingers brushed against each other. Jim felt a spark go through his hand. Pam giggled and said, “Hey you shocked me.” Jim gave a half laugh and went into his bedroom to change his own clothes. He put on a pair of black shorts and a blue golf shirt, which really made him look like an American Eagle model. After he changed he sat on his bed, which had clean sheets, and turned on his iPod and placed it in the speaker set he had. The first song that played was Broken Social Scene’s Lover’s Spit. He closed his eyes and let the song wash over him. He didn’t hear Pam come in the room, but he did hear the song change to Hollaback Girl by Gwen Stefani. Jim rarely listened to top 40 or pop music, but he found himself singing along to the song when he heard it on the radio and it was catchy. He opened his eyes and saw that Pam was playing around with his iPod.
“Umm excuse me Miss. Beesly, who said you could change my music?”
“Sorry. I just wanted something to dance to, and this song is such a guilty pleasure of mine.”
“Yeah I know what you mean.”
Then they both were silent, and Pam swayed her hips to the music. She looked adorable in Jim’s too large sweater. Her face was rosy from where she scrubbed the nose and whiskers off, and her hair was down around her shoulders. Pam then walked to Jim and pulled him up and got him to sway to the music too. Something she would never have done with out those beers and tequila inside of her. As the song ended they were both laughing and getting into dancing. Because the iPod was on random the next song that came up was Fake Plastic Trees by Radiohead. Both of them froze and then so as not to make it to awkward Jim held out his hand and Pam took it. He pulled her into his arms and they danced to the song. Pam looked up at Jim, he was hot, but in a geeky understated way and she couldn’t take her eyes off of him. He looked down at her,
“What is it? Do I have something on my face?”
Pam didn’t answer, instead she snaked her hands up from around his neck into his hair and pulled his lips down to hers.
She kissed him hard and deep. Jim wanted to pull back because he knew this was wrong, but he just kissed her back more fiercely. A small moan escaped Pam’s lips as Jim slid his tongue into her open mouth. Her tongue responded. Jim than pulled away and looked at her face, his eyes scanning across quickly looking for the “No, don’t, we can’t” it wasn’t there. He leaned in again and pressed his lips hard on hers. Pam’s hands were pulling at Jim’s hair and it was driving him crazy. He could feel himself harden, and he knew that through his shorts Pam could feel it too. She stepped back from him and pulled the sweater over her head. She was wearing a red lace bra underneath. Jim could see her nipples hard below the thin fabric. He stepped towards Pam, grabbed her and kissed her along her collar bone to her bra strap. He slipped the left one off and kissed where the fabric had just been. Pam had her eyes closed and was enjoying the feeling of Jim’s warm lips on her flesh. She reached her hands down and started to pull of the blue golf shirt. Jim raised his arms to help her. Jim put his hands on Pam’s hips and slid the shorts and her panties off of her in one motion. He then lifted her and she wrapped her legs around him. He turned her and placed her on his bed. He took off her bra and kissed her simultaneously. He slowly kissed down her chest and then kissed her breasts, they were soft, just as Jim had always imagined. As her took a nipple in his mouth he heard a moan escape Pam’s lips. He took his hand and traced it down her body until he came to her clit. His long fingers stroked Pam and she writhed on the bed. Jim lifted himself to watch her. He had always wondered what she would look like while he pleasured her. The image of a naked Pam, experiencing pleasure on his bed, made Jim harder still. Jim moved his fingers to Pam’s opening. She was wet, and Jim slid two fingers in. Pam moaned, “Jim” it was full of desire. He moved his fingers again and Pam arched her back so that she pressed harder into Jim’s hand.
Pam knew she was about to come. Jim’s strong and long fingers worked magic on her. She had never experienced anything like it. She opened her eyes for a second. Jim was staring at her with such passion and lust, and he was working her in just the right way that she came. She arched her back and moaned his name. After she came down, Jim lowered his mouth onto hers. Her tongue caressed over his lips and her teeth bit at his lower one. She could feel on her thigh how hard Jim was. She knew that she wanted him inside of her. She pushed him up with her hands, and then grabbed at the waist band of his shorts. She pulled them down, and then Jim used his feet to slip them off. She could see that Jim was ready. He was hard, and huge, she knew that he would fill her and it would be amazing. Jim reached over her head and grabbed a condom from the night table. He slipped it on without difficulty. The he lowered himself on top of her again. Pam raised her hips so that Jim could enter her. When he did he heard her gasp in. He looked down at her and she looked up. He kissed her again. Then he started to thrust into her. For Pam having Jim inside of her was pure ecstasy, she had never felt anything like it before. Jim was thinking the same thing. He thrust harder and faster. They were both close to coming again, and Jim made one final thrust before spilling into her. As he came he loudly said her name. Pam just let everything out.
As Jim pulled out of Pam he said her name again, and Pam whispered his. He rolled to the right of her, and lay on his back panting. The pleasure that they had both just experienced was like nothing else they had ever done. Pam pulled the sheets out from under her and draped the cotton across her body and his. She then rested her head on his chest. They both fell asleep listening to the sound of the other breathing.
At seven in the morning Pam woke up. She looked around at the unfamiliar room, and last nights pleasure came back to her. She knew what she had done was wrong, but it was also so right. She knew she had to leave, she had to get home. She would never tell anyone what happened, she knew Jim wouldn’t either. She knew that she had to go home to Roy. She called a cab and gathered up her things. She found her cat ears under her skirt. She left them on Jim’s night table. She leaned over and kissed Jim, before leaving for the waiting cab.
Jim woke up twenty minutes later. He was dejected when he didn’t see Pam still in the bed. He knew that last night shouldn’t have happened, but yet there was something about it that made it feel like it should. As he glanced at his clock on the night table he saw Pam’s cat ears. Beneath them a note in Pam’s hand writing the first line was crossed out:
Jim I
A memory. Please never leave me.
Love Pam.
She was gone. Jim was left to pick up the pieces of his heart. In a cab Pam sat wishing she had written down what she really meant. She wiped away a tear.
On Monday they would act as if nothing happened.
