I woke up the next morning, after a great night's sleep. Maybe I woke up a little earlier than usual, but other than that, everything was pretty normal. John and I watched a little SportsCenter on ESPN, and I even read some of the paper. I mean REALLY read it, not just glance at the words like when you can't concentrate. I read the entire sports section, just like always. I remember I read quite a lot about the Phillies, because it was August then.
The girls were up and they almost immediately wanted to start a new round of the monkey games. Lisa put the squash on that right away: "Flower girls do not play monkey games, girls. Neither do grooms."
OK, that's when I did feel just the littlest bit of nerves in my stomach. But it was nothing I couldn't handle easily.
And I kept my cool as we got dressed, though John kept giving me glances and smirking almost constantly. "Feeling OK?" he'd ask. And I was very smooth, "Never better." I was collected as we all made our way to the church, as we waited in the back room with the minister, and even as I heard the music start.
Maybe that bit of nerves was a little bigger at that point, but there were none, not even a little hint, of the signs this bet was riding on. I really thought I was in the clear. Yeah, maybe I was a little smug about it; maybe I raised my eyebrow every time I saw John grinning at me like a fool, maybe even once I held my hand out to show that it wasn't trembling.
Then it was time to take our places. There seemed to be more people than I thought there would be, and they were really dressed up. And they were all, almost every one of them, looking at me. I remember thinking that I was the only sorry thing TO look at, at that point; neither Pam's sister nor my nieces had come down the aisle yet. I knew as soon as the ladies showed up, no one would be paying any attention to me.
So her sister came down the aisle. She looked happy and lovely and every head turned to look at her. Just as I predicted.
Then my nieces were next. Wow, so adorable. All of the sudden, my heart seemed to rise in my chest, then fall somewhere along the region of my belt, and my mouth felt full of cotton, and my palms were sweaty. I gulped; yes, I did, and I know John heard it because he snickered softly.
And there was Pam.
Now, I'm going to try to remember what I really felt and thought, but it's going to get jumbled up with everything I have felt for her since I've known her, and everything she has come to mean to me over time. But I do remember being struck, in that moment, by this:
She was a bride. She was MY bride. My beautiful, stunning, magnificent bride.
I should have known that everything about her would be even more glorious that day. But I didn't. I thought it would just be Pam in a white dress; Pam with her hair done in some fancy way; Pam carrying flowers. I had seen Pam all kinds of ways and loved every one: cute, tired, adorable, sick, beautiful, asleep, dressed up....and lots of other ways too.
But I had never seen anything like this, ever. I had never seen her as my bride.
And seeing her looking at me, on her dad's arm, making her way slowly toward me, both made my nerves worse and calmed me too. There was no uncertainty; this was the best moment of my life. And yet, there was new dampness in lots of unfortunate places. Worst of all, my palms, and now here she was, and I had to take those lovely hands in mine.
I discreetly, so discreetly, just....shifted my palms against the sides of my pants legs.
I could feel John smirking.
And in my right pocket, there was a handkerchief. Good planning on my part, if I do say so myself, because just as we turned to face the minister I pulled it quickly out. And as she turned to give her bouquet to her sister, I was able to very quickly pass it along my face. None of the guests saw it, and neither did Pam. The minister did, and smiled kindly. John did too, but I already knew I had lost that bet.
John behaved himself through the rest of the ceremony. I don't remember much of it other than Pam said "I do" and so did I, and we were Mr. and Mrs. Halpert.
I do remember this though. Just before we took our walk down the aisle, John leaned over to me and whispered in my ear. He saved his kind words of congratulations for the toast. Instead, his first words to me as a married man were:
"Pay up, sucker."
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The story has grown to include me sweating bullets and trembling like a leaf. There's all kinds of details depending on whose company we're in. The part where I pull out the handkerchief is where everyone loses it; that I thought I could take a discreet little swipe and no one would see is just hilarious to my family. (And for some reason everyone thinks it's funny that I carry a handkerchief in the first place, and my nieces tease me about it and ask if they can see one. I always tell them my handkerchief is only for one special lady. But I always carry gum in my other pocket to give them instead.)
And it doesn't matter who is around or how long it goes on, the story always ends the same way. And I make sure that Pam is around when I say it:
"Yup, lost that bet. But won the prize."
Author's Chapter Notes:
So, this is it. Two chapters, I'm out. Thanks for reading!
Recorderalways is the author of 7 other stories.
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