Pam woke up to the blaring sound of her alarm. She groaned and rolled over to glance at the clock. She had stayed up until nearly 2 unpacking and organizing her room. It was 7:00. When Natalee had come home the night before she suggested that they might want to share a cab to their orientation at the Dunder Mifflin corporate offices. That gave Pam a little over an hour to get ready. She crawled out of bed and quietly opened the door to her room. She was surprised to see that Natalee was already up and cooking something on the stove.
“Hey!” Natalee said when she saw Pam. “I thought I’d make us a “first day of internship” breakfast.
“It smells great!” Pam said walking over to the window to take in the view. “Wow! This is so beautiful!”
“I know! Isn’t’ it? I couldn’t believe it when I moved in.”
Pam was surprised at how easy it was for her to talk to Natalee. She usually was very reserved around people she didn’t know.
“Well I am going to run and jump in the shower.” Pam said grabbing a towel from the rack on the back of her door.
She climbed into the shower and let the hot water pour over her tired body. While washing away the loneliness from the night before, Pam's thoughts automatically went to Jim. She started to wonder about what he was doing in Scranton, even though she chided herself for thinking about a man, who based on his recent behavior, obviously didn't care about her anymore. He had to have found out that she wasn’t coming back by now. She was almost sure that Michael had made a full blown announcement to the office about it. He’s probably relieved, she thought. Now he can focus all of his attention on Karen without her staring over his shoulder. Pam sighed and tried desperately to think of something else other than Jim. Today was a big day…an exciting day. She needed to focus on that and not on what she had left behind.
After her shower Pam returned to her room to get dressed. She opened her closet to survey her choices. Hmmm…what to choose? Sweater and skirt….or sweater and skirt, she thought. “I’m going to have to get some new clothes.” she said decidedly as she pulled out a gray skirt and a blue and white stripped button up shirt. She slipped on her shoes and pulled on her navy blue cardigan. She carefully clipped half of her hair back in a barrette and then looked at herself in the mirror. I guess this is as good as it’s going to get, she thought as she grabbed her coat and scarf and walked out of her room.
“Breakfast is on the table!“ she heard Natalee shout out from down the hall.
“Thanks!” Pam called back, sitting down at the beautiful, polished table. She ate quickly…mostly because she was anxious about getting to the orientation on time. “Okay! I’m ready.” Natalee said as she entered the kitchen. She was dressed in a gorgeous short sleeve, scoop neck black sweater over a white blouse. She had on gray trousers and black high heels. Pam immediately was embarrassed by her simple skirt and cardigan ensemble.
“You look nice!” Natalee said sincerely. “Blue is a great color on you!”
“Oh…thanks.” Pam said shyly. “I really like your sweater.”
“Thanks!” Natalee said. She grabbed her purse and coat and asked, “Are you ready to go?”
“Yup!“ Pam carefully placed her dishes in the sink and slipped on her coat.
“Are you nervous?” Natalee asked as she locked the door behind them.
“A little bit…are you?”
“Absolutely! But I’m sure we’ll be fine!” They got into the elevator and rode down to the lobby. Once outside Natalee hailed a cab and they were on their way. Pam was impressed with the confidence that Natalee had and she hoped that over the next six months some of it would rub off on her.
Pam took a deep breath as she followed Natalee into the lobby of the Dunder Mifflin corporate office. She was starting to feel really excited. She was actually looking forward to what today would hold.
“Third floor,” she said to Natalee as they walked towards the elevator.
“We’re here for the internship orientation.” Natalee said to a somber looking receptionist that sat behind the desk.
“Conference room A.” she said. “Down the hall…first door on the right.”
“Thanks!” Pam said with a warm smile.
When they walked into the conference room there was already four or five other people sitting around the long table.
“Hi!” Natalee said as she sat down in a chair and gestured for Pam to sit next to her. The other interns smiled and nodded. They all looked as nervous as Pam felt. There were some informational packets on the table in front of them so Pam picked hers up and started thumbing through it. After five minutes of reading through the packet Pam realized she didn’t understand a thing of what she just read. Her heart began to beat loudly in her chest. “What the heck am I doing here?” she thought. She looked around the table at the other interns. They all looked the part of the New York city intern. They were all dressed sophisticatedly. They were reading through all the information with serious looks on their faces. She felt like they were all silently judging her. Who was she? Some no name receptionist from Scranton. She didn’t even finish college and here she was in New York with these successful people who had goals and ambitions. For the past few years her biggest ambition had been to get Roy to sit down to dinner with her before he was too drunk to carry on a conversation. The room suddenly felt too warm and Pam knew she had to get some air.
“I’ll be right back.” she whispered to Natalee.
She quickly stood up and hurried out of the conference room. Once out of sight of the other interns she leaned against the wall and tried desperately to calm herself. While she was on the brink of hyperventilating she heard a voice call out her name. She whirled around to see Jan hurrying towards her with her arms full of papers.
“It’s good to see you!” Jan said as she approached.
“Hi…” Pam muttered weakly.
Jan must have noticed the pale color of Pam’s face because she quickly stopped and asked, “Are you okay? You look…kind of pale.”
“Oh…” Pam said suddenly embarrassed. Here she was with this great opportunity and she was standing out in the hall about to cry. “No…I’m…fine. Just a little nervous…that’s all. Kind of out of my element here.”
“Don’t worry Pam.” Jan said sounding surprisingly empathetic. “I am sure that everyone is just as nervous as you. Come on….you’ll do great.”
Jan was right. She could do this. She had to do this. For herself. Pam took a deep breath and then followed Jan back to the conference room.
“I’d just like to welcome everybody to the Dunder Mifflin Graphic Arts Internship orientation.” Jan said loudly. “I am really excited about this program and I think that you will out get a great experience out of it.”
Pam relaxed more and more as Jan explained the outline of the internship. They would get to take art classes three days a week and on the other two days they would be split into groups and get to shadow a graphic design team at a major company in the city. Pam was getting excited. She had no idea about all the different art classes they would get to take. There was sketching classes and computer animation classes. This was opening up a whole new world of opportunity for her.
After Jan explained the classes she announced the different teams and where they would be shadowing a design team. Pam listened as Jan called off the names of the other interns. They were assigned to all sorts of big name ad companies and music labels. Finally she heard Jan say, “And last, but not least. Pam Beelsy, Natalee Shepard and Aaron Duncan…you will be working at The Metropolitan Museum of Art with their art directors Marcie Watson and Thomas Karp.”
Pam was stunned. She’d never even been to the Met before and now she was going to get to work there. It took almost all of her self control to not jump out of her chair. She was really going to do this and she felt great.
Jim walked into the office and sat down quietly at his desk. He was a few minutes early and was grateful for the silence. He had not slept well at all the night before and his head was throbbing. He felt his stomach growl, but had no desire to eat. He had gone to dinner with Karen the night before and had spent the whole time picking absently at his plate. He knew Karen could tell that something was up. Luckily though she had been wise enough not to ask. He tried to focus on her. Tried to listen to the story she was telling him about her friend in New York that had run into some celebrity on the subway. But he kept going back to thinking what Pam was doing, if she was meeting a celebrity or sitting at home thinking of him. But he quickly pushed that thought aside She left Scranton to get away from you, Halpert. She's not going to be thinking about you anymore.
He was staring blankly at his desk when he heard Dwight’s voice behind him.
“What did you do?” Dwight asked letting his briefcase drop loudly to the floor.
“What?” Jim asked not bothering to look up.
“You did something….to my desk. I can tell. You have that look.” Dwight said
“Dwight…” Jim began.
“Damn it Jim, I do not have time for this! Some of us value our jobs and we actually sell paper instead of wasting our time plotting childish pranks so if you could please tell me what you've done so I can rectify it and go on with my day, I would appreciate it.”
“No pranks today Dwight.” he said coolly as he pushed his chair back from his desk.
“Guess Pam was the brains behind them all along.” Dwight said sitting down carefully in his chair.
Jim just shrugged. “Guess so.” he said and turned and walked towards the break room.
He was pouring himself a cup of coffee when he saw Karen come into the office. She sat down at her desk and looked around for him. Finally she caught his eye as he was coming out of the break room.
“Hey!” she said. “Feeling better?”
“Better?” he asked.
“Yeah…you seemed…out of it last night.”
“Oh…yeah. Sorry about that. I’m fine.” He tried to give her a reassuring smile as he walked back to his desk and sat down. He tried to suppress the feeling of anger and grief that immediately filled his gut when Ryan walked in and sat down behind the reception desk.
He spent the rest of the morning working in silence. He only got up from his desk once to use the restroom. He didn’t even look up from his computer when Dwight slammed his hand on the desk during his online game of Dungeons and Dragons and yelled at this computer, “Try and take my magic staff again why don’t you.”
He tried to ignore the fact that Karen’s eyes were blazing a hole into the side of his face…just willing him to look at her. He knew she didn’t deserve to be treated like this. It wasn’t her fault that Pam was gone. It was his.
“Can I have everyone’s attention please?” Michael called coming out of his office. He has sulked in a little after nine and had spent the whole morning at his desk. Occasionally a loud sigh could be heard, but he was uncharacteristically quiet.
“I feel as if the morale in this office is at an all time low since the fast departure of our former receptionist.” Michael said. “There is a weird vibe in here today and it is my job as the boss to fix that.”
“We have work to do.” Stanley mumbled.
“Come on Stanley. What? You don’t care that Pam has up and dumped all of us. I mean it sucks. Think how I feel…think how Jim feels. They were all Ross and Rachel.”
Jim could instantly feel Karen’s eyes on him again.
“Michael…Pam just took an internship. She’ll be back.” Phyllis said.
“Oh really Phyllis? And how do you know that? I mean come on. We’ve all been hit hard by this.”
No one moved and Michael finally rolled his eyes. “All right. Everyone into the conference room….NOW!!”
Jim knew that no one was going to get anything done until Michael got this out of his system. He finally stood up and walked into the conference room. He was soon joined by the rest of his colleagues. He smiled kindly up at Karen when she sat next to him, but he couldn’t ignore the questions in her eyes.
The rest of the day was a blur to Pam. They went to classes and ate lunch in the little courtyard outside the building. The other interns were all very nice and Pam felt energized to work with them. Before she knew it the first day was over and she was following Natalee to a cab that was waiting outside. She sighed as the cab pulled away from the curb.
“I can’t believe we get to work at The Met.” she said to Natalee.
“I know! I’ve never even had the chance to go. Have you?”
“No! I can’t wait to see it.” Pam was surprised that someone as sophisticated as Natalee had never been such a famous museum.
*beep* *beep*
Natalee flipped open her phone to read her text message. “A couple friends are meeting for dinner tonight.” she said to Pam. “You should totally come with us.”
“Oh…thanks…but…” Pam hesitated.
“No buts….” Natalee laughed. “Your coming with us.”
“I would love too, but I don’t have anything to wear. The entire contents of my closet consists of basically 2 things…skirts and cardigans.”
“That’s not a problem. You can borrow something of mine. Then this weekend…we’ll go shopping! Your in New York now!”
“That is really nice of you…but I can’t borrow…” Pam trailed off because the truth was she really wanted to go out with Natalee and her friends.
“I don’t want to hear another word. When we get back to the apartment we will get ready and we are going out to celebrate!”
The minute the walked into the apartment Natalee dragged Pam back to her bedroom and threw open her closet.
“Pick something…” she said gesturing inside to the massive amounts of clothes that were hanging neatly.
Pam was stunned. “I wouldn’t even know where to start.” she said laughing.
“I know! There’s a ton. Well let’s see….” Natalee began rifling through the closet. “Do you have any black pants?”
“Yes…I do actually have some of those.” Pam said carefully fingering the piles of shirts that Natalee was throwing on the bed.
“Here we go!” Natalee exclaimed. “This will be perfect!” She handed Pam a beautiful light blue shirt. It had an empire waist and silk sleeves. “Wear this with your black pants and….” Natalee rummaged through her closet again, “…these shoes.” She said handing Pam a pair of simple black wedge ballet flats.
“This is beautiful! I can’t borrow this!” Pam said trying to hand the shirt back to Natalee.
“Whatever! Your wearing it! You look great in blue! Now go get changed and then we can work on some hair and makeup!”
Pam felt as excited as she would have if she had been dressing for a royal ball. After discarding her gray skirt and cardigan in the hamper she carefully slipped on the top. It fit perfectly. She pulled on her black pants and the shoes.
“Come out here!” she heard Natalee call. “I want to see it!!”
Pam hesitantly opened the door and walked out.
“Wow! That shirt is perfect on you! You look great!” Natalee said happily.
“Really?” Pam said.
“Yes! Don’t look in the mirror yet though. Let’s complete the look!”
Pam followed Natalee into the bathroom. She sat still while Natalee took the barrette out of her hair and then rubbed some sort of mousse into her curls. Then Natalee added some eyeliner and mascara and then stood back to look at Pam.
“Now you can look!” she said.
Pam slowly stood up and walked towards the full length mirror that hung on the back of the door. She could hardly believe her eyes when she caught her reflection. She didn’t even recognize herself. The shirt did look great on her. Her curls were hanging softly around her face and the eye makeup had really made her green eyes stand out. The shirt did look great.
“Wow!” Pam said softly.
“I told you!” Natalee said. “Now just give me ten minutes to change and we can go!”
Pam sat down on the couch and flipped open her cell phone. She had one new text message from Kate asking how the orientation went. She quickly texted her back with: It was awesome. I am going out to dinner with my roommate and her friends. You wouldn’t even recognize me!’
She hit send and then stared at her phone. Slowly she pressed a few buttons to send a new message.
To: Jim
Hey. Just wanted to let you know that I am in New York.
No…that was stupid. He probably already knew that. She erased it and tried again.
To: Jim
I’m sorry that I didn’t say goodbye.
She sat there looking at the words. She didn’t know what else to say. She went to push send, but her thumb hesitated over the button. Maybe he didn’t care. Maybe it was just better this way.
Her thoughts were interrupted by Natalee coming back into the living room.
“You ready?” she asked as she pulled on her coat.
Pam glanced again at the words on her phone. Then she slowly pulled her thumb away from the send button and flipped the phone shut.
“Yup! I am ready!”
After not achieving much after Michael's “Dunder Mifflin family counseling session” where he was trying to force everyone to sign contracts saying they wouldn't divorce the family, Jim didn't get much done, job wise. He kept looking up at the reception desk and after a while, Jim believed that Ryan thought he had a new admirer in the office. After surfing the internet and map questing the miles between Scranton and New York, 5 o'clock rolled around and as Jim was putting all his files into his messenger bag, Karen approached him and asked him what they were going to do tonight. He hated that she just assumed they would be together every night. He honestly didn't feel like being with anyone tonight and he knew he had to come up with something fast.
“What if we just grab some take out and watch a movie or something?" Karen asked as they got out of the elevator and walked across the lobby.
“I would love to but I've already promised Mark that I would go to his weekly poker game. How about tomorrow?"
Karen let out a long sigh. “Jim...is there something going on that your not telling me. You've been like...somewhere else these past couple days.”
"Its just Michael's been so...Michael lately and I've been really stressed. I'm sorry."
Jim knew immediately that Karen didn‘t believe him. “Are you sure that‘s it? It just seems like there’s a lot more too it than that. I mean you’ve been with Michael for years. You should be numb to his weirdness by now.”
Jim was getting frustrated. “Why are you making a big deal out of this?"
“Because you've been acting all mopey and weird since we came back from Christmas and I don't get what your deal is.”
"I'm sorry Karen…but I really don't feel like going anywhere tonight."
“"Then why are you going to your friend's poker game?" Jim knew he was caught. She took her keys out of her purse and moved towards her car. “I get it…you’ll hang out with your friends, but you’ll blow me off.”
"No that's not what I meant." Jim sighed. "Listen, can we please just go out tomorrow night, okay?"
“Whatever Jim. This isn't what I thought would be happening when I moved all the way out here.” She didn’t say another word. Just climbed into her car and drove off.
Jim ran his fingers through his hair. He knew he was being a jerk. He knew that she didn’t need to be treated like this. He pulled out his cell phone. He opened the contacts screen and began scrolling down to find her number. “Crap…” he thought when he noticed that he had scrolled down to far. He was about to go back up when a name caught his eye. Pam. It was like something was drawing him past Karen’s name and towards the one name he was trying so hard to forget. He clicked on her name and opened a new text message.
To: Pam
Why didn’t you say goodbye?
He stood there in the dark parking lot of Dunder Mifflin for a good five minutes just staring at his phone. His thumb brushed over the send button about 50 times while he wrestled with the idea of actually sending it to her. She was finally doing something for herself and she didn’t need him to bring her back down.
He slowly canceled the message and closed his phone. Maybe it was just better this way.
Author's Chapter Notes:
I own nothing but extreme love of these two crazy kids and angst....
Chapter End Notes:
Should we continue this or leave it the way it is? Whatever your opinion may be,leave your review at the beep.....beep.
