Pam looked up from her sketch book to see the sun rising up over the city. She had woken up really early, made herself some tea and had gone out on the balcony to sketch. It had been a week since she had sent the e-mail to Jim and he had not responded. The first few days she had been really anxious about it, but finally her nerves had calmed and she had done a good job of not thinking about it. She hadn’t sketched since her meltdown the week before and she was excited to add something new to her book. She carefully picked up a pencil and began to outline the skyline. Her pencil traveled smoothly over the page, adding shape and dimension. She wished that she could truly do the city justice. It wasn’t like anything she had ever seen before. It was big and loud, but there was just something about it was the genuinely magical. After awhile she stopped and looked at her sketch. She was actually pleased at how it was turning out. When she was alone and it was quiet she always found that her thoughts turned to Jim. She thought about the jokes, the laughs, the moments when his eyes would find hers and her heart would stop at the thought of what might happen next. She thought of the time on the Booze Cruise when he had looked at her so deeply, so intensely that she had been sure he was going to kiss her. She knew deep down that she had wanted him too, but her lack of courage paralyzed her and she did the only thing she could which was to leave. At that moment, up above the briefly quiet city she had a feeling of closeness despite the separation, that she only felt with him. A feeling that that made her think that she should give this drawing to him when she was finished with it. That is…if she ever saw him again. She worked on the picture for awhile longer before going inside.
She had just curled up onto the couch with a book when she heard a knock at the door. Pam glanced at the clock…6:45 AM. “Who on earth could be here this early in the morning on a Saturday?” she thought as she walked over to the front door. She peered through the peephole and squealed when she saw her sister standing on the other side. She flung open the door.
“Kate! What are you doing here?” Pam exclaimed pulling her sister into a hug.
“I decided to come and surprise you! Thought you could show me around this city of yours.” Kate said smiling.
“Come in!! I can’t believe you here! It’s great to see you!”
Kate sat down next to Pam on the couch. “You look great Pam. Looks like New York is agreeing with you.”
“Well I don’t know about that, but I do feel good. This has been great!”
“I want to see all this stuff you bought on your big New York shopping excursion.” Kate said. “I can’t believe you actually spent a whole day shopping….and had fun doing it!”
“I know! I couldn’t believe it either. Are you hungry? Do you want to go get some breakfast?” Pam asked.
“Sure…that sounds great.”
“Let me just change really quick…and leave a note for Natalee.”
Kate followed Pam into her bedroom and flopped onto her bed. “How are you guys getting along?”
“Great!!” Pam said opening her closet. “She is really nice. We actually hang out a lot.”
“Holy crap!” Kate said jumping off the bed and hurrying over to the closet. “You bought all this stuff?”
“Well…some if it was mine from before…but yeah. I did go a little crazy on the shopping spree!!”
“Your clothes are officially cooler than mine. Never thought that would happen!” Kate said with a laugh.
“Oh thanks!” Pam said giving her sister a gentle shove. “Well I can’t take any credit. Natalee picked out stuff, I tried it on, she told me if it looked good and I bought it.”
“It’s like you have your own personal shopper!” Kate said and she rifled through the clothes.
“Check out this dress…” Pam said pulling out one of the new dresses she had bought.
“Wow! This is gorgeous Pam! We’re going to have to have a fashion show or something!”
Pam laughed and carefully placed the dress back in the closet. “Yeah right! Now I just need somewhere to wear it.”
“Oh that reminds me!” Kate said opening her purse. “This came for you a couple of days ago.”
She pulled out a square white envelope and handed it to Pam. Pam looked at the return address label…small and white with a tiny refrigerator in the corner.
“This must be Phyllis’s wedding invitation.” She tore open the envelope and then started to laugh.
“What’s so funny?” Kate asked.
Pam handed her the invite and then pulled a sage green t-shirt out of the closet.
“This is your wedding invitation!” Kate said. “Complete with the P and R monogram at the top!”
“I know! I can’t believe she used the same ones!” Pam laughed as she pulled on the t-shirt and a pair of jeans. She grabbed her new brown cable zip sweater and said, “Ready?”
Kate tossed the invitation on Pam’s bed and followed her out of the room.
Pam quickly jotted a note for Natalee on the white board that hung next to the fridge. Then she grabbed her purse and keys and headed for the door. They went to the small café around the corner.
“So….” Kate said sitting down across from Pam. “Anything new? With…..anything?”
“Way to be subtle Kate!” Pam said taking a sip of her tea. “Well…he e-mailed me…last week sometime. It was short. He asked why I left without saying goodbye.”
“Seriously? Did you write back?”
“Yeah…nothing too detailed. I just told him that I was sorry that I didn’t say goodbye. I didn’t know what else to say…you know?”
“Wow…way to tell him how you really feel!” Kate said with a wink. “I am sure he misses you though!”
Pam scoffed softly. “Yeah I don’t know about that. He hasn’t written me back since.”
“I’m sure he will.” Kate said.
“Enough about him! Tell me about you! What’s new? Seeing anyone?”
Kate knew better than to keep pushing her sister. So she quickly changed the subject to school and life back home in Scranton.
After they had finished eating they headed back to Pam’s apartment. Natalee was sitting on the couch watching the morning news.
“Hey!” Pam said setting her purse down on the entry table. “I brought you a muffin.”
“Oh thanks! I thought you were still asleep!”
“No…actually my sister surprised me. She came up to hang out for the day!” Pam said motioning to Kate who had come in behind her.
“Hi!” Natalee said standing up to greet Kate. “Kate right?”
“Yeah! It’s nice to see you again.”
“You too!” Natalee took the muffin Pam handed her and sat back down on the couch. “What do you guys have planned today?”
“Nothing really. Probably walk around the city a little bit, go see the Statue of Liberty. Maybe go by the Met. What do you have going on?” Pam asked sitting down in the armchair.
“That sounds fun! Well Aidan has a meeting at the GAP corporate offices and then we are meeting for lunch. Then he is taking me out to this warehouse where they are going through all the inventory that didn’t sell or were too overstocked on. They sell things to employees and their friends/family for like 75 - 80% off. You guys should totally come. They have tons of great stuff and it’s so cheap!”
Pam turned to Kate. “What do you think?”
“That sounds awesome! I am always up for shopping! Are you sure you don’t mind!”
Natalee laughed. “You sound just like Pam! Of course not. It’ll be totally great. Just give me a call when you are ready to go and I’ll give you directions. It doesn’t start until 3:00 so you can meet us there just before if you want.”
“Thanks Natalee. That will be awesome!” Pam said pulling on her sweater. “Ready?” she asked Kate.
“Yeah! We’ll see you in a while.” Kate said to Natalee
“Definitely! Have fun”
Pam and Kate spent the rest of the morning taking the ferry out the Statue of Liberty. They laughed and took pictures. Pam loves spending time with her sister and for the first time in a long time her every waking thought wasn’t filled with Jim.
They went to Central Park and had lunch at the Saurin Parke Café and then wandered around the park. Around 2:30 Pam’s cell phone rang and it was Natalee telling her directions to the warehouse.
The warehouse sale was huge. Kate loved to shop so she was in her element. Pam just laughed as she watched her race around picking up shirts, skirts, pants, jackets and shoes.
“This is incredible!” Kate would say as she would find something else to buy.
It took two hours before Kate finally was done. Pam had done her fair share of shopping as well, but she moved at a much slower pace. She had picked up several more tops, some jeans, a couple pairs of dress pants, two new skirts, a jacket, another dress and two pairs of shoes.
“I don’t think we’re going to be able to fit all of this in one cab!” Pam said looking at Kate’s pile of shopping bags.
“I did get a lot didn’t I?” Kate asked sheepishly as she stepped back to survey the damage.
“You think?” Pam laughed. She tried to help Kate pick up some of her bags, but was unsuccessful.
“Need some help?” Aidan called jogging over to them.
“Hey Aidan! I think my sister went a little crazy!!” Pam laughed.
“Oh no way! Last year I brought my sister and my mom. They each had to have their own cab to take them, plus all their stuff. I’ve never seen anyone buy that many clothes.” Aidan looked at the piles of bags surrounding Kate. “Actually your sister might be a close second!”
“It’s a sickness really.” Kate said laughing.
Eventually Pam, Kate and the mountain of shopping bags were packed into the cab. Once back at the apartment Pam helped Kate load her bags into her car. Then they carried Pam’s bags upstairs. Kate laid on Pam’s bed while Pam put away her new clothes.
“I am so glad I came up to see you!” Kate said.
“Your just happy because you got to stock your closet for the rest of your life.” Pam retorted. “The fact that you get to spend time with me is just an afterthought!”
‘Whatever Pammy. I missed you! I was worried about you when we left last time. Actually we all were. It’s not like you to do something so spontaneous.”
“I know, but it’s been a really great thing for me.”
“I can see that….but….” Kate stopped.
“But what?”
“Are you just going to give up on everything else that easily?”
“Give up? There wasn’t anything to give up.”
“Pam….” Kate said firmly.
“What? I was engaged to Roy…Jim was in love with me. I said no…he kissed me…I said no again and he left. He was gone for sixth months. Yes, he came back….with a girlfriend. There wasn’t anything to give up. He moved on….and now I have to move on also.” Pam said sinking onto the bed next to her sister.
Kate rolled her eyes. “You’re telling me that you don’t think that there is even the slightest possibility that he might still feel something for you? Because as much as you want to deny it I know you still feel something for him.”
Pam sighed. “It’s not that easy. I broke his heart….I know I did. His face….you should have seen it.” Pam could feel the tears welling up in her eyes.
“Pam….you have changed so much since you broke up with Roy. You have gained this confidence you never had before. I know what you were hoping things would be like when he came back. But so they weren’t what you imagined…oh well. That doesn’t mean it’s over. Fight for him!!” Kate sat up so she could put her arms around Pam.
“I’ll see what I can do.” Pam said softly.
“I just want you to be happy Pam. So happy. You deserve it.”
“I know you do….thanks.” They sat in silence for a few minutes.
“Pam?” they heard Natalee call out.
“In here.” Kate called as Pam quickly wiped the tears from her eyes.
“Hey!” Natalee said sticking her head in the door. “You guys up for some dinner and a movie or something?”
“Yeah….that sounds great.” Pam said standing up.
“Aidan is finishing up his meeting so he can pick up whatever we want.”
“You guys decide. I am up for anything.” Pam said. “I want to go grab a quick shower.”
Pam grabbed some clean clothes and a towel and headed into the bathroom. By the time she had finished her shower and had gotten dressed Aidan had brought the food. They all filled their plates and then settled in the living room. The conversation flowed effortlessly. Pam had already spent a lot of time with Aidan and Natalee. After they had gone to dinner the weekend before Aidan spent a few days at their apartment and had taken them out every night. One night they had all stayed up until 2:00 in the morning talking and Pam and Natalee were both yawning all through their classes the next day. Pam really admired Natalee and Aidan as a couple. They were perfect for each other. She could see that after just spending a small amount of time with them. Aidan was very kind and respectful of Natalee. He actually sometimes reminded Pam of Jim. The way that he was always putting Natalee first. He just had a gentleness about him that Pam had always seen in Jim.
The time passed too quickly and it was soon time for Kate to leave. After saying goodbye to Natalee and Aidan, Pam walked with Kate down to her car.
“Thanks so much for coming.” Pam said throwing her arms around her sister.
“Of course! I had so much fun!”
“Me too! Hopefully I can come home in the next couple of weeks.”
“Well aren’t you going to come for that wedding? The wedding invitation idea stealer?!” Kate laughed.
“Oh…yeah…maybe. It’s just….”
“I know…he’ll probably be there. All the more reason for you to go! Fight for him!” Kate gave Pam one last hug, got into her car and with a wave she was gone.
Pam went to bed that night with Kate’s words resonating in her head. Fight for him…it sounded like a good idea…the only problem was she had no idea how to do that.
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It wasn’t until Wednesday of the next week that Pam heard back from Jim. His e-mail was short and simple. He said that he understood her needing to go. He wrote that he was okay…work was the same. There was no mention of Karen. At the end of the e-mail he had put his phone number and had written that he wasn’t sure if she still had it and she should give him a call sometime. She wasn’t sure what he meant by that. Of course she still had his number. Often late at night she would find herself ready to dial it, but could never work up the courage to actually send for fear that she would freeze up if he answered. She didn’t even know what she would say.
The next couple of weeks passed by quickly. She had tacked Phyllis’s wedding invitation up on the bulletin board that was by her desk, but she still hadn’t decided if she would RSVP or not. Her days were spent working feverishly on projects for the internship and at night if her and Natalee weren’t still working on projects they were hanging out at places around the city. Aidan was a frequent visitor to their apartment. He came up from Boston every couple of days for meetings and would usually take them both someplace nice for dinner. Pam felt bad about infringing on Natalee’s time with Aidan, but most of the time they insisted that Pam come with them or if she didn’t they would bring her back something and then would spend the rest of evening hanging out at the apartment.
One night Pam was sitting on the couch with the wedding invitation in her lap. Natalee was out with Aidan and Pam had spent the entire night with her phone in her hand debating on calling Phyllis to RSVP.
“Hey!” Natalee said walking through the front door. “What’s going on?”
“Oh nothing.” Pam said.
“What’s that?” Natalee asked motioning to the invitation.
“It’s an invitation to a wedding of this woman that I worked with in Scranton. I can’t decide if I want to go or not.”
“Why not? I mean if she was your friend from work….” Natalee stopped suddenly as the realization hit her. “Jim….”
“Yeah….” Pam said.
“Oh you are going to that wedding. You are going and you are going to look SO hot, Jim won’t know what hit him!”
Pam laughed. “I don’t know about that!”
“Come on! You bought that great dress that you still haven’t worn. It’ll be perfect.”
“I do want to go. I could see my family and other friends from work….but…I don’t have anyone to go…with.”
“ I have the best idea!!” Natalee said with excitement. “You are going to take Aidan!”
“What?!” Pam asked incredulously.
“Yeah! Take him with you! He can go as your date. You’ll look totally hot and have a hot date and Jim will be SO jealous!”
“I don’t know Natalee…”
“Come on Pam. I know that he is still in love with you and you have to show him what he’s missing.”
“He is not still in love with me!” Pam said weakly.
“Whatever…you call and RSVP to that wedding right now. I am calling Aidan.”
Pam knew it was useless to argue with Natalee when she was like this so she flipped open her phone and dialed Phyllis’s number. She got the answering machine.
“Hi Phyllis. It’s Pam. Sorry it’s taken me so long to RSVP. I hope it’s not too late. I just wanted to let you know that I will be there….”
She glanced over at Natalee who gave her a thumbs up.
“….with a guest. Call me if there is a problem! See you soon!” Pam quickly hung up.
“I can’t believe I let you talk me into this!” Pam said throwing one of the throw pillows from the couch at Natalee.
“Aidan is all for it. It will be great!” Natalee smiled.
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It was almost as if fate was revealing itself because the following Monday in between classes Jan called her into her office.
“How are things going Pam?” Jan asked.
“Great! Everything is going really well.” Pam said.
“Good. Well look the reason I called you in here was to ask if you would be willing to do a small project for me.”
“Sure…what sort of project?” Pam asked.
“I have asked each intern to design a logo for a different branch. I wanted to see if you would design the logo for the Scranton branch.”
“Oh….well sure. I’d be happy too.” Pam said.
“The only thing is that we would need to go down to Scranton…meet with Michael about some ideas. As the regional manager he gets the final say in the logo.”
“Oh….” Pam faltered.
“Is that a problem?”
“No…not at all. When do we need to go down there?” Pam asked.
“Well I was going to give you a choice of a couple of dates and see what worked for you.”
“I am actually going down there next weekend for a wedding. So the Thursday or Friday before?” Pam didn’t understand why her heart was beating so fast.
“That’s perfect.” Jan said writing it down on her calendar. “Ok, I will call Michael and tell him that we will be down there next week.”
As Pam left Jan’s office the thumping in her chest increased. All that she had been running from was quickly catching up to her.
