Sunday morning Jim awoke to the smell of bacon in his apartment, that hadn't happened since he was in high school. He walked out to the kitchen after brushing his teeth to be greeted by a very chipper Lisa.
"Morning!" she said brightly.
"Hey, what's all this?"
"Just some breakfast, I had a craving for bacon and eggs, so I ran to the store. There's coffee too, I can't have any, but I know you drink it."
"Thanks, so you must be feeling pretty good then huh?" Jim joined her at the table to eat after he grabbed some coffee.
"I just feel a little more relaxed today than I have in the last few weeks. I feel like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders."
"That's good actually; you know my book said added stress at the end of a pregnancy could cause early labor."
"Yeah, I read that too, I just…I guess I'm relieved mostly because I was so worried that this whole thing was going to make you hate me, and now here we are getting along and just dealing."
"Why would you think I'd hate you? We've always been friends, and it takes two Lisa, it's not your fault. We were both there."
"I was just thinking that maybe you'd resent me for showing up and dropping a baby into your life, disrupt what you have going on."
"Honestly, I'm still trying to get used to it, but things are looking up. It's not so bad, just different."
"Well, I just hope things continue to look up. Like you going out with Pam tonight."
"Yeah, I'm really looking forward to it."
"I just hope she isn't uncomfortable with us living together."
"I don't really know what to expect from tonight, but if things work out between us, well… I think Pam will be fine with everything, I mean she's a very understanding person."
"Well, I hope it does go well, I don't see why it wouldn't. Just relax and try to show her a good time."
"Yeah….I just don't want to get my hopes up."
"She said yes to the date, and I know she likes you. Just enjoy it Jim, like I said, you deserve happiness." She smiled and nodded, she truly meant that, this man had been so good to her in the past week, and he could have been a jerk and told her to take a hike. She really hoped Jim could get to where he wanted with Pam.
"So, where are you taking her?"
"Not sure actually, maybe Cugino's, but I don't know, I'm kind of nervous."
"Well you have the whole day, I'm going to the mall, I need a few things."
"Do you want me to go?"
"Nah, you have a date to plan, I can handle it."
"I really don't mind, plus I can pick your brain for ideas."
"Okay, sounds good, I'm getting dressed." With that Lisa went to get ready.
Jim cleared the breakfast dishes and then got dressed; he and Lisa went to the mall where she picked out a car seat, and a baby carrier. After the mall they had lunch and Jim decided to go with Tony's Bistro for dinner it was casual but really nice and cozy, romantic even. When they got home there was a message on the machine, Jim's mom called about Thanksgiving plans. Jim invited Lisa after he called back; she wanted to meet the mother of her new grandson. After that he relaxed on the couch for a while to watch the Eagles game. Once the game was over he got ready for his date.
Pam was applying her lip gloss when she heard the door bell ring just before 6:00, this was it. Jim was there for their "date" as he called it. She took one last look in the mirror before going to answer the door. She was nervous and wasn't sure of where they were going, but knowing Jim she went for something casual but not too casual. She was actually pleased with her "ensemble" as Kelly would call it. He looked stunned when she opened the door.
"Hi"
"Hey, come on in, I'm just about ready." She stepped aside as he walked in.
"I just have to put my boots on; you're early." She said over her shoulder as she walked back to her bedroom.
"Yeah, sorry…"
"Don't be…no biggie."
Jim watched her go; she had on a black long sleeve v-neck sweater which fit her body perfectly and a dark pair or jeans. Her hair was completely down and curled slightly at the ends. He always found her beautiful, but tonight she was stunning. She came back out a minute later her purse in hand and few inches taller, he wasn't used to seeing her in heels.
"You look really…wow."
"Thanks." her cheeks were instantly red and very warm.
She pulled on her coat and they walked out to his car, he held the door open for her as she climbed in. They were fairly quiet on the way to the restaurant. Both not knowing what to say; Pam had been looking forward to this all day, and now here they were. After Jim gave his name for the reservation they were shown to a small table in the corner, Jim ordered some wine as they looked over the menu.
"This is really nice, I've never been here."
"Really? Jim was actually pleased by this.
"Really, so how's the food?"
"Well, it's actually really great, I love their shrimp scampi."
"Hm…I think I wanna try the lasagna."
"That's really good too."
They were enjoying the wine and the cozy atmosphere, then their food arrived and Jim insisted Pam try some of his shrimp, which she agreed was delicious. After dinner they relaxed and enjoyed the wine. They spoke about their holiday plans for that coming Thursday. She was driving to see her parents and would stay there for the weekend. Jim told her about going to his parent's house and them wanting to meet Lisa. Pam felt that jealousy again, she wasn't sure how to feel, she believed what Lisa said about not wanting to be with Jim, she couldn't help it though that they were living together, having a baby and were going to his parents together for Thanksgiving. Pam just did what she could to bury that feeling and she would try to enjoy her evening.
After they ordered some dessert, Jim took her hand that was resting on the table and looked at her with such sincerity in his eyes as he spoke.
"Pam, I just really want to say that you have no idea how much it means to me that you've really been a great friend over this past week."
She smiled at him not sure what to say, her emotions were running high and she wanted to be honest with him, she just wasn't sure how honest she should be.
"You've always been there for me, so I want to always be there for you."
Jim felt guilty at her words; he honestly hasn't always been there. He'd thought a lot about how quickly he ran from Scranton without giving her so much as a goodbye. He wasn't sure what to say so he gave her hand a squeeze and she continued.
"I know how scary it is when everything in your life suddenly changes. Anyone going through something like that could really use a friend, believe me…I know how it feels to need that friend."
"Pam, I'm really sorry-"
"No Jim, please don't apologize. I get it, why you left…I do, and I'm sorry for hurting you."
"Well, I am sorry just so you know…You know I can't believe how brave you've been through all of this. I know it had to be hard for you."
"It was, but I'm doing okay now. And I think you're brave too, this whole baby thing, I think you're handling everything really well considering… I'm really proud of you."
Jim couldn't help the emotions he felt at that moment, he didn't know what to say, he just gave her hand another squeeze. They both fell silent when their dessert came, they shared the tiramisu and the waitress brought them their check not long after. It was a cold night and Pam was shivering when they got into the car. Once they arrived back at her apartment, Jim walked her to her door. She was freezing and couldn't wait to get inside, but she didn't want to say goodnight just yet.
Jim stood there nervously while she fished out her keys, she was trying to muster the courage to just invite him in, and he was trying to decide if he would kiss her or not. They had a nice time but they weren't necessarily flirty and he wasn't too confident that kissing would be a good thing. Once the keys were in her hand she finally decided she would just go for it.
"D'you wanna come in?" she looked up at him with hope in her eyes.
"Sure."
With a smile she turned and unlocked the door, she flipped the switch for the lights as Jim followed her inside. She took his coat and hung it in the closet with hers. She headed straight towards her tea kettle; and filled it with water.
"I'm freezing…I'm gonna put on some water, do you want some tea?"
"Sounds good."
Jim stood there glancing around at the living room, he was glad to see the home she had made for herself. Feminine but not too much, it wasn't frilly, just like Pam, and one of the many things he loved about her. She told him to go sit down, the tea was almost ready, he offered to help but she shooed him away. A few minutes later she walked into the living room still clearly cold. She pulled off her boots as she settled on the couch next to Jim who now had a steaming mug in his hands. She wrapped the throw from the arm of the couch over her legs which were now mostly tucked under her. Jim noticed that she her teeth nearly chattered.
"Pam you're shivering. C'mere." He moved closer to her.
"I'm okay I just have to warm up." She took another sip of her tea as Jim put his arm around her. She leaned into him and felt much warmer immediately. They were quiet for a while, just enjoying each others touch and warmth. Pam wished she could stay right here with him always. It had been a great night and here she was pressed close against him, breathing him in. She leaned forward to set down her mug and then leaned back into his embrace.
They watched a movie on cable, it was bad and they made fun of just about every minute. The comfort of just sitting with him and enjoying something so simple felt amazing, there was no worry or fear, it felt like home. Closer to the end of the movie Pam felt more comfortable, she was no longer shivering so she took the blanket off of her legs and put it over the arm of the couch.
"All better?"
"Much better, thanks."
"Anytime"
Silence fell over them, for a few minutes neither knowing what to say or do. They had spent a lot of time this week talking about Jim and the situation he found himself in and they'd said quite a bit at dinner. They really didn't need words right now, just the comfort of each other. Pam felt like this was exactly where she belonged, with Jim, in his arms. She didn't want to rush things, but she wanted him to know that there was more than just her friendship. It was right, and she'd thought a lot about it, she knew now that she wanted only him, baby or not.
"Jim…" when he turned towards her she brought her left hand up to his cheek and met his eyes. They were gazing into each others eyes for a moment, each trying to read the others thoughts. As she parted her lips to speak, she was cut off by Jim kissing her softly and she forgot what she wanted to say.
He'd wanted to kiss her from the time she opened the front door and now he was. She was surprised at first but that quickly faded, she pressed her lips to his in return and wrapped both arms around his neck. It was a long, slow kiss. Jim's mind was racing and he reluctantly pulled back to say something; "Pam" She pulled him right back to her for another kiss now he forgot what he wanted to say.
Pam never wanted to stop kissing him, she felt dizzy, it was like she was spinning but never wanted off the ride. She only had a moment of his lips that dark night in the office, but now it was lips and hands and arms and Jim, it just felt like he was everywhere and it went on and on. She knew it had to stop though, at least for tonight, no matter how much she wanted this, him; she knew they should take it slow. If this was going to work, they needed to take it slowly. She gently pulled away from his embrace, her lips still slightly on his; she really didn't want to stop. "Jim" she whispered against his mouth. He pulled back too look at her "I'm sorry," he whispered, though he wasn't the least bit sorry.
"No, this is great, it's just…I don't want to rush you or this, you know? Just with everything going on right now..."
"Yeah…you're right." Jim was nodding.
"Okay."
"Maybe I should get going; it is getting kind of late."
"Yeah"
Pam walked him to the door; she wrapped her arms around his waist and gave him a tight squeeze.
"….Can I see you before Thursday? You know; if you're not busy maybe you could come over here and I'll make dinner."
"Definitely." he couldn't stop smiling.
"Good, how about Wednesday night after work?"
"Wednesday's good…. yeah."
"Cool….I had a great time tonight, thank you."
"Me too," Jim took her face in his hands and kissed her with all he had, which left her breathless when he pulled away. "Goodnight."
"Night." she said dreamily as he stepped outside into the cold November air. Pam shut the door; she leaned against the wall and slid down it. Kissing him felt like floating and now she could barely stand.
Over the next few weeks, Jim and Pam had only been able to see each other a few times outside of work. Jim was trying to take care of Lisa when she needed him, and Pam was busy with school. When they did have time they would go out to dinner, they had seen a few movies, one evening they went to an art gallery for an opening. Each time Jim would drop her off, he'd kiss Pam at her front door, but that was as far as they'd gone. She hadn't even invited him in since their second date when he came for dinner. She was still trying to cope with feeling slightly jealous of Lisa, who she'd become quite friendly with. It was a little confusing, Pam really did like her, but she still had this bit of jealousy. She was afraid that taking it further with Jim might make it worse, it was starting to go away though and Pam was glad she and Lisa had become friends by this point.
At work Jim had told Michael and Toby about the baby coming, he wanted to take a few vacation days once the baby was born to try and get a routine started with the baby. The office staff, thanks to Michael, was surprised that he'd be having a baby in a few weeks. Most people gave him congratulations and left it at that. He clearly did not want to get into the private details. Angela seemed to have an opinion, though she'd only scoff when she'd see him in the break room. Dwight couldn't believe Jim was man enough to manage "procreating" and said he hoped the baby wouldn't be a slacker like his father, but said no more than that.
Everything was going well with the pregnancy; her doctor's visit the week of Thanksgiving was good. They found no problems, everything checked out normal. Lisa was relieved; she'd been worried that something would go wrong after all of her seemingly bad luck lately. Jim's family welcomed Lisa warmly at Thanksgiving dinner; Jim's mom even had a few baby gifts for them. Jim was glad the baby and Lisa were doing well, and was really getting excited about the baby coming. He felt him kick a few times when he and Lisa were hanging out at home just watching TV. She would pull his hand onto her belly if the baby started kicking. Jim's mom had a Christmas ball made up with the baby's name on it; 'Nathaniel James'.
Nathaniel was her fathers name, as soon as Lisa told him she was pregnant, her dad was looking forward to being a "pop-pop." It still broke her heart to think he was gone, and these were her first holidays without him which was more difficult. Lisa wanted the baby to also have Jim's name, she was kind of old fashioned that way, and he was already being a good father. The more she thought about it, Lisa was happy that this good man would be the father of her child and not a jerk like Joe. Jim was really looking forward to being a dad by this point; he even bought the baby an Eagles jersey. Jim and Lisa were getting along great and she was always open to his ramblings about Pam. She was really happy for him and just knew it would work out. Things were slow moving, but he seemed happy.
Lisa was a sweet girl, with a lot of sadness in her past, but she made the best of it and carried on with her life. She hoped one day she'd be lucky enough to fall for a great guy that could just love her for the person she is. Her ex had been calling her lately, saying he was sorry and begging her to come back. She told him no and they should just leave it be. He already knew the baby wasn't his, Lisa figured he was just after her money again.
Lisa was going to be starting her maternity leave after the first week in December, one week early by doctor's orders. Things were going well, but her feet were swollen and painful, and she was just generally uncomfortable. Joe hadn't stopped calling her at work after she changed her cell phone number. She was glad she had moved and he didn't know where she was living, or who she was living with. She didn't think he would respond well to the fact that she was now living with the man she "cheated with" according to him. They were broken up at the time, but in their arguments since he found out it was not his baby, he insisted that it was still cheating.
Jim was concerned when the work phone calls were clearly upsetting Lisa, she explained that she wasn't even listening to the messages, she just hated that he kept calling and wouldn't just leave her be. Jim felt very protective though and he was not happy with this guy messing with her or his child. On her last day of work her coworkers had thrown her a small baby shower, she really appreciated it and the gifts she received. She called Jim to tell him about it, she would need him to unload the car when she got home. He and Pam had dinner plans, but they could take care of that first.
When Jim got home Lisa was already there inside, feet up on the couch. Jim said hello and dropped the gifts he'd had, and then grabbed her car keys to bring in all of the gifts she'd received that day. He set all of the bags in the corner; he promised Lisa they would check everything out the next day. He had also gotten a few gifts that day at work, Phyllis made a blanket and some booties for the baby, Oscar gave him a Phillies outfit and a stuffed baseball. Toby and Kelly pitched in for a gift certificate to Target and even Michael gave Jim a "world's best dad" coffee mug. Jim changed for his date with Pam after making Lisa's dinner; all she wanted the last 3 days was grilled cheese sandwiches and chili. Jim teased her about the weird combination, but she insisted it was the baby's weird taste and not her own.
Lisa forced herself to get up to drop her dishes in the sink and then headed for the bathroom. Once she was done peeing for what felt like the hundredth time that day, she headed back toward the couch. The door bell rang before she could sit and it was cold out so, she called out "I'll get it" as she went to answer the door to let Pam in.
She had just called not twenty minutes ago and said she was going to pick Jim up instead; she had a gift for the baby and figured since everyone else gave their gifts today, she would too.
When the door opened Lisa tensed up immediately, "What are you doing here, how did you-?"
"I followed you home from your office today; who do you think you are not answering my messages?"
She shook her head no as she started to close the door, "No, I'm not dealing with you, please just leave me alone." Joe pushed the door open and walked right in and shut the door behind him.
"I don't think so, where's your boyfriend?" he was looking around. Lisa could smell the liquor and smoke; he clearly went to a bar after he followed her.
"Who do you think you are? Get the hell out of here, NOW!"
Jim came out of the bedroom when he heard Lisa yell; he had his iPod on in his room and didn't realize that it obviously wasn't Pam at the door. He was walking toward Lisa but didn't take his eyes off of the man he assumed was Joe.
"What's going on? Lisa, you okay?" She nodded as she turned toward Joe, she was scared and nervous, but she didn't want him to get out of hand, she knew how to deal with him when he'd been drinking.
"Joe, this is my friend Jim, he's getting ready for dinner with his girlfriend, she'll be here any minute and I think you should just go." Jim had moved toward Lisa until he was between her and Joe, he didn't like the way this guy just barged into his home and was now yelling at Lisa.
"You expect me to believe that? I'm not stupid!"
"Listen man, my girlfriend is going to be here any minute and I really think you should go, we can call you a cab if you want. Lisa really needs her rest."
"Fuck you!" Joe spat at Jim. This wasn't looking very good, but Jim was a salesman and could deal with people. He wanted to knock this guy out, but he was drunk and Jim was a fair guy, plus he didn't like confrontation.
"Lisa, have a seat okay, Joe let's talk about this."
"Nothing to say asshole, you stole my girl!"
"Look man-" Jim began but was cutoff by Lisa.
"JOE! Just stop it, I already told you-"
"You shut up!" he pointed his finger at Lisa like he'd done it a million times before.
Just as Jim reached for the door knob so he could shove this guy out, Joe took a swing at Jim, he ducked and the fist ended up crushing into the door. He yelled out in pain or anger, couldn't tell for sure. Jim knocked him down and told Lisa to call the police. He was holding the drunken man down when the bell rang again. Jim yelled come in and Pam stepped inside. She noticed Jim struggling on the floor holding someone down, and she was confused.
"What the hell?"
"Pam, this is Joe and he's waiting for his ride to the police station. He just wanted to drop by for a little visit." Lisa explained, her words dripping with sarcasm.
"I see." Pam said as she walked over and sat on the couch next to Lisa.
"See Joe, not lying, Jim's actual girlfriend is here and now you're ruining her date." She was pointing to Pam and speaking like Joe was a five year old.
He was drunk, but not so drunk that he didn't feel stupid. He apologized and said he'd be cool. Jim helped him up and asked him to go. He was headed for the door when he stopped suddenly and turned toward Lisa,
"I will find out who you cheated with and I'll kick his ass….screw you and that kid."
Jim wasn't having any of it now, this was his home and it was his child. "Let's go asshole, now." Jim opened the door and shoved him outside. Joe turned around as he stumbled out the door, as he was shutting the door Joe turned around and barreled into Jim. He fell back and hit his head on the floor pretty hard. Lisa and Pam both cried out "Jim!" Pam jumped up and ran toward Joe, who was now punching Jim in the face with his good hand as he sat on top of him. It all happened so quickly she jumped on Joe, knocking him sideways and off of Jim. She turned to Jim her voice full of concern.
"Jim, are you okay?" she was shaking him slightly, but he was knocked out, his lip and nose were bleeding. Lisa was frozen in fear on the couch; she felt so guilty and was terribly afraid of Joe.
The police were pulling up with their lights on when Pam was yelling for Lisa to call an ambulance, the police came in, one grabbed and cuffed Joe who was trying to get up and he was grumbling out words like "whore" and "slut". The other bent down and checked Jim's pulse;
"He's alive, probably just knocked out."
Pam turned to Lisa, "He hit his head pretty hard." She was frantic with worry, her Jim was hurt and she didn't know what to do.
"Jim" her hand was on his cheek and she started to cry.
He started to stir, grunted slightly and opened his eyes. Pam was as relieved as was Lisa, who went to the kitchen and grabbed a towel and handed it to Pam who started to wipe the blood off his face. He tried to sit up but the officer told him to stay still, and he should go to the hospital. Pam cradled his head in her lap and ran her fingers through his hair. Lisa was crying and apologizing through sobs. Pam tried to comfort her;
"It's okay Lisa; this isn't your fault, just calm down. You don't want to go into labor, than you'll both be in the hospital."
No sooner had she said that, Lisa grabbed her stomach and cried out. The officer had her sit down on the couch and radioed for another ambulance, Jim was still lying on the floor with his head in Pam's lap, he was conscious but slightly out of it. The ambulance had just arrived, when they came inside one EMT checked on Jim and the other checked Lisa. Jim maybe had a concussion, his lip wasn't so bad, the nose bleed stopped and he'd likely have a black eye in the morning. Lisa was crying out again so they put her on the stretcher and rushed her to the hospital. Pam went with her as the officers stayed with Jim, the other ambulance had arrived and Lisa needed her more.
Pam managed to call information and then Jim's parents from the ambulance. She was doing all she could to calm Lisa, who was worried it was too early to have the baby. She only had 2 weeks left, so the EMTs told her it should be fine. They arrived at the hospital and Lisa was rushed to maternity. The doctors said everything looked fine, just early labor was all. Pam was holding her hand and they were trying to get through this without Jim. They were both worried about him and hoped he would be okay. When the doctors came back in for another check up after half an hour, Pam stepped out of the room to have a nurse call the ER to check on him.
Pam found out that Jim was being discharged from the emergency room and she was relieved, his mother knew Lisa was in labor and they were probably on the way up. She went back towards Lisa's room when nurses and doctors came rushing out of the room with Lisa's bed. They were rushing down the hall Pam ran after them and was told they had to perform and emergency cesarean. Lisa was unconscious and Pam was immediately flooded with worry. They arrived at the operating room and rushed Lisa inside, Pam was told to wait in the lounge. She ran back to the room Lisa was just rushed out of and found Jim and his parents talking to a nurse.
Pam told them what she knew and they all went to the waiting area, as it was the only thing they could do. Pam felt awkward meeting his parents like this, but they seemed nice enough and they had heard Pam's name a few times before. They were all worried about Lisa and the baby. Jim explained that he was fine, just a few bumps and bruises, plus he could look forward to a wicked morning headache. He started pacing around the lounge, sick with worry that something was wrong.
A short time later a nurse came out to give them an update, she told them about the baby, he was doing well, eight pounds, two ounces and 22 inches long. Jim hugged Pam as she congratulated him. He held her so tight she almost couldn't breathe, he was so worried and now he just felt relief that the baby was okay. That relief was short lived when he asked about Lisa and if he could see her. The nurse explained that she was still in surgery and that a doctor should be out to speak with him as soon as possible. They were all now very concerned for Lisa, if the baby was okay, what was going on, why was she still in surgery. Jim started pacing again and was running his hands through his hair, after another half hour the nurse came back out and had them follow her to the nursery.
Jim couldn't help but feel overcome with love for this new life when they put his son in his arms. Pam welled up at the sight of him and the joy in his eyes; she congratulated him as a few tears rolled down her cheeks. Jim's parents both held the baby for a short time. Finally Jim asked Pam if she'd like to hold him, she felt slightly hesitant, she didn't know if it would be right considering Lisa didn't get to hold him yet and he was her baby, Jim told her that it would be fine and so she took the baby in her arms and looked down at his little face.
He didn't have much hair and he was red and wrinkly, but Pam thought there was never a more perfect baby. He had Jim's ears and according to his mom, he looked just like Jim when he was first born. She was holding him and trying to picture Jim as a baby when she noticed the doctor heading toward them. The nurse put the baby back in the nursery while Pam and Jim went to speak to the doctor.
"Sir, are you Lisa Johnson's husband?"
"No, I'm the baby's father, but we aren't married, what's going on? Is she okay?" Jim felt alarmed at the doctor's question, but tried to keep calm.
"How can we contact her next of kin?" Pam squeezed his hand worried about what was to come next from the doctor.
"What's going on?…I mean, she lives with me, I'm the baby's father, her father died recently, there's no one else."
"Okay, well…I'm very sorry sir, we did all we could-"
"No…" Jim said as Pam grabbed his hand.
"Ms. Johnson lost a lot of blood, during labor there was a rupture in the uterus. There's nothing more we could do. I'm very sorry but, she's gone."
Jim had to sit down, he thought he was going to pass out or be sick. Pam helped him sit in a nearby bench. His parents rushed over and Pam did her best to explain through the tears. Lisa was gone, his son's mother, Jim was in shock, and he just couldn't believe this was true.
Author's Chapter Notes:
So, here we go...now it all get's a bit interesting, Elly thank you so much for being my beta!
Same disclaimer, I own nothing, only for entertainment, yadda yadda yadda.
Enjoy
Same disclaimer, I own nothing, only for entertainment, yadda yadda yadda.
Enjoy
Chapter End Notes:
The next chapter is nearly done, thanks to everyone who has read and I'll try to not leave you all hanging for too long.
