Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
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Ryan knew he was a shithead. It had been three days since he called Kelly. He had taken her out to a movie on Thursday before the long weekend. It was some sickening romantic comedy with Sandra Bullock, "The Lake House", that wasn't even funny. She cried through the whole thing.
Then he took her back to his place afterwards and he fucked her.
It was good. Kelly was very emotional from the movie, and that carried over into his bed. Her body was warm and naked against his, and the tears dripped on his chest were hot. He couldn't help but laugh at her over-dramatic ways. She began to cry while they were fucking.
"What if you went away to Iraq and died there?" Kelly asked dramatically, clinging to him. "I would never, ever, ever get re-married." Ryan laughed in her face. "Would you shut the fuck up?" he said. "Ryan!" Kelly hit him, they wrestled a little. "I'm sorry." Ryan said. He stopped and kissed her forehead.
"I meant to say, would you shut the fuck up and suck my dick?" Ryan smiled. Kelly hit him again, he pinned her down and they started fucking again. When he could tease her like this, he liked Kelly a lot. She did all the special things to him he liked, and then he returned the favor. It was the most fun he'd had with a girl in bed.
But afterwards, as usual, Kelly got annoying. "Do you think Jim and Pam will ever be together?" Kelly asked dreamily. "Will they ever be like us, Ryan?". Ryan sighed. "I don't want to talk about people from work now, Kelly." He said. He turned away from her to sleep.
But now Kelly was awake. She was hungry but Ryan wanted to sleep. He had stayed up late the night before studying for business school.
"Make yourself a sandwich in the kitchen." Ryan responded grumpily.
This was not the right thing to say. They got in an actual fight, because Kelly accused Ryan of never taking her out to dinner.
"I paid for the movie, didn't I!?" he yelled at her, a bit too loud. Kelly burst into tears. "Stop screaming at me!" She yelled back, and then demanded he drive her home. They drove in silence and they had not spoken the whole long weekend.
Ryan spent the weekend jerking off and trying to find a better job. He couldn't bear working at Dunder Mifflin anymore. Everything depressed him. Jim and his obvious crush on Pam, Angela and Dwight's weird relationship only he knew about, and Michael's homosexual crush on him, of course. The only thing nice was that he would occasionally get to have sex with Kelly, a girl who, for all her bad qualities, was indeed growing on him. In fact, if she cut out the crying by half, he might even be fairly excited to spend time with her.
But she didn't. And she was always demanding things of him. Dinners, long phone conversations, holding hands constantly, and little presents. She usually made up for it, with some memorable nights in bed (who taught her how to do all this? Surely not Cosmo alone!). But she could be so fucking annoying.
But more importantly, Kelly was legitimately interested in his life. She wanted to know about business school. She never laughed when he said he wanted to own his own company. On the contrary, she was excited for him and asked what she could do to help him. He loved that, he really did.
But sometimes, a man can't be bothered. And that's why he didn't call her all weekend. And that's why when he came to work on Monday, Kelly didn't look at him. She was quiet and angry and her eyes were pink with crying. Jim gave Ryan a look like "Good luck, man, she is pissed."
Fuck.
Ryan knew he couldn't do this alone. He approached Pam's desk. Pam, he had never been able to crack. She was pretty enough - not his type, too withdrawn and mousey, and he liked more exotic girls, but he knew Kelly looked up to her.
Pam looked surprised to see him.
"Hi Ryan." She said. "Need me to fax something?" Ryan shook his head no.
"Pam, I need your help." Ryan confided. Pam and Ryan took a stroll around the building. He told her a little about what was going on.
"So, it's a physical thing." Pam said. Ryan nodded sheepishly. "But a little more than that." he added. Pam nodded again.
Pam looked at him with compassion. She had pretty, kind eyes. Her cheeks were pink in the cold outside. Ryan suddenly realized why Jim was in love with her.
"Ryan," Pam said. "You need to decide something. If Kelly is just going to be your fuck-buddy, you need to tell her. So she can find a boyfriend who wants to do all that stuff with her that you hate doing."
Ryan was taken aback to hear Pam use a curse word. All of sudden, he saw that Pam was a girl, a girl his own age. And kind of a cool girl.
"She's had fuck buddies before, Ryan." Pam said, "But she really likes you."
"What?" Ryan asked. Kelly had told him she had only been him. Not even when she was in junior college, had she ever had sex.
"No one who works here anymore." Pam said. "But she'd eventually be okay with that, but you need to tell her." Pam squeezed his shoulder compassionately. "I know its a shock." Ryan was flabbergasted. "There's a lot you might not know about us Dunder Mifflin girls." Pam gave a hint of a smile, like Mona Lisa.
Ryan then realized it was probably Pam who taught Kelly all her inventive moves in the bedroom. He gave her an interested look. She poker faced it, and they walked back in.
On the way inside, Jim gave Ryan an unmistakable dirty look. "Hey man." Ryan said. Jim barely muttered back a "hey." He glared at Ryan.
Oh God, Ryan thought. I hate this stupid Office. I'll have to straighten things out with Jim later. But now, where is that stupid slutty Kelly? Ryan thought.
TBC...
Author's Chapter Notes:
The beginning of some good Ryan/Kelly fic, I hope.
