Pam Beesly finally died at 3:00PM.
It was Wednesday and Jim had left that morning to go to New York for a 3 day meeting at corporate. The phone hadn’t rung in at least fifteen minutes and her interest in FreeCell had waned over an hour ago. There were no pranks to play, no memos to write and no Jim to distract her.
She had held up well until now. She only had to survive another two hours but death came suddenly as it often does. She wondered what her obituary would say as she felt her head grow heavy and fall to her desk. Maybe it would say,
‘Pamela Monroe Beesly died on Wednesday, December 5th after a long struggle with boredom. Her body was discovered only after the automated voicemail filled up. She will be missed by one Jim Halpert who had better not forget to call her tonight.’
Her cheek felt cool resting on the desk. Her eyes closed as her mind wandered back to this morning when she woke up before Jim. He was sleeping soundly on his back next to her. His chest rose and fell in rhythmic contentment. They didn’t have to get up for fifteen minutes and as much as she hated to wake him, he looked so inviting she rolled over and snuggled up against him wrapping her arm around him and pulling him close to her.
“Ugh, Mom, please just 5 more minutes.”
“Your Mom woke you up this way?”
“We were a close family, Beesly”.
“I’ll say.”
He turned his head and placed a scratchy, unshaven kiss on her forehead. She couldn’t contain the huge goofy smile it brought out in her.
“Do you really have to go today?”
“Hmm,” he murmured thoughtfully as he ran his hand down her back. “Well, Ryan, my boss, is counting on me to show up so I can partake in the celebration of his purported genius and since I’m the only member of the Scranton branch he invited... yeah, I could definitely skip it to spend the day with you,” he said as his eyes sparkled at the idea.
Ryan had put together a three day event in New York called the Dunder Mifflin Infinity Expo. It was an effort to demonstrate how the website was going reinvent sales and give greater competition to the encroaching threat of Staples and Office Depot. There were going to be demonstrations and training sessions for the top salespeople as well as parties geared toward networking everyone within the company. Stock analysts from the major investment houses were invited to a question and answer session Friday in an effort to boost confidence in the company’s flagging stock price.
“No, I guess you need to go,” she said glumly, hugging him tighter.
“Nah, they won’t miss me. Dwight can go in my place. I’m sure a bunch of financial hotshots would love to hear all about ‘Battlestar Galatica’ from a slightly off-kilter beet farmer. Or maybe Andy can go and regale them with tales of anger management and what life is like for a C- Cornell graduate. And don’t forget Michael, he would happily move the whole thing to New York's finest Chili's. Or even better, Hooters."
“Oh yeah, act all high and mighty about Hooters now,” Pam said as she gave him a pointed look.
“Pam, I’ve said it before and I’ll say again. The hot wings at Hooter’s are to die for. This is an indisputable fact.”
“Fine, but I’m still not going.”
An hour later Jim was standing in her doorway ready to leave for New York.
“So, are you going to miss me?” he fished.
“Hmm. No.”
“No? No? Not even a little?” he mock pleaded.
“Nope.”
“Ouch.”
“Oh c’mon Jim, you’re only going to be gone three days. I’ve got class tonight, ‘Finer Things’ meets tomorrow and Friday night I’m having dinner with my Mom. I’ll be too busy.”
“Fine. I’m going to miss you, though.”
“You’d better.”
He laughed. “So mean.”
She leaned up to receive his goodbye kiss when she heard someone calling her name.
“Pam?... Pam?...”
It was Dwight’s voice. What was he doing here at her apartment?
His voice grew louder and more insistent. “Do you need emergency assistance?!?! Tap once with the third finger of your left hand for yes.”
Jim dissolved before her eyes and her keyboard came into view.
“Michael! Michael! Pam is down! Pam is down!” Dwight yelled.
Before she could react, she felt her chair violently pulled backwards and saw Dwight jump in front of her and put his face mere inches from hers.
“Pam, can you hear me? It’s Dwight Schrute. Blink twice if you understand me.”
She was confused. “Dwight, what are you doing?!?”
“Saving your life, clearly.”
“I’m not in danger. I fell asleep on my desk,” she said pushing her chair back away from him.
His brow knit. “Are you sure? “
“Yes...YES!” she added emphatically when she saw his doubt.
“I’m sorry but I saw an employee of this company who appeared to be experiencing a medical emergency and I acted accordingly.”
Michael came out of his office. “Dwight, what are you doing? Leave her alone.”
“She appeared to be in need of assistance. I am a Volunteer Sheriff’s Deputy for Lackawanna County and I would be remiss in my sworn duties if I-”
Michael cut him off. “Look, just leave her alone. She’s fine. She’s probably just got her period or something.”
Before Pam could protest, Dwight jumped back in.
“No, Michael that is not correct. According to my calculations, she’s not due for-”
“Can we PLEASE not have this conversation?” Pam interjected.
“Fine, but rest assured that I am fully trained in basic life saving and will not hesitate to use my services if I feel that you or anyone else in this office is need of them. That is the first rule of the Lackawanna Volunteer Sheriff’s Deputy and I intend to uphold it at all costs.”
She wasn’t sure why that sounded like a threat.
“Dwight, go back to my office. We’ve still got work to do. And Pam, I’m expecting a call from Bill Conners of the Pennsylvania Bigfoot Society so just put him through when he calls.”
Michael had come to work this morning and asked her to gather everything she could find on Bigfoot. He had watched a documentary on the Discovery Channel last night and was now convinced of the existence of Bigfoot. He and Dwight had spent the day pouring over the information she had found on the internet.
“Alright people, back to work,” Michael said as he and Dwight wandered back into his office.
Minutes later, having sufficiently calmed down, Pam glanced around the office. She could hear Angela snapping at Kevin for singing softly while filling out paperwork. Stanley was taking a sales call while expertly finishing a crossword puzzle. Phyllis was knitting while Creed watched from his desk with increasing intensity. Meredith was rubbing her temples and Oscar was standing at Andy’s desk reviewing an expense report with him.
Pam felt the torpor of the familiar melt her back into her chair. Even with under two hours to go, she wondered how she would make it.
The ringing phone did nothing to assuage these thoughts.
“Dunder Mifflin, this is Pam,” she robotically intoned.
“Why do I find those to be the sexy words ever spoken?”
She felt her face flush when she realized who it was.
“I told you stop calling me at work or my boyfriend Jim might find out about us,” she whispered in to the phone conspiratorially.
“Oh thanks, Beesly,” Jim said in defeat.
“You really are easy,” she said as she tried to hide her smiling face from Dwight’s suspicious glare.
“Then I guess the bathroom graffiti at Chili’s is right about me.”
“Hey, I was drunk.”
“Are we still hiding behind that defense?”
“Yep, and be glad you don’t know what it says about you in the Cugino’s bathroom cause that would make you blush.”
“Okay!”
“Hey, shouldn’t you be impressing people with your encyclopedic knowledge of the world of paper?”
“I’m currently between meetings and since the Dunder Mifflin Expo is all the fun of Hell but without the pitchforks and flames, I decided to call my girlfriend to have her remind me why I’m doing this.”
Hearing him say girlfriend in reference to her always made her heart flutter.
“You’re doing this because romantic nights at Dwight’s beet farm are not free and you know how much your girlfriend likes them,” she answered brightly.
“Yeah about that, we should really work on going somewhere else so I don’t have to keep feeling guilty that our one romantic getaway was at a co-workers beet themed bed and breakfast.”
She made a noise of protest. “That was hands down THE most romantic night of my life! How dare you feel guilty!”
“Are you kidding? Now I feel worse! We spent the most romantic night of your life at Dwight’s. Ugh, I really suck as a boyfriend.”
“Jim in all seriousness, you could carry me to the top of the Eiffel Tower at midnight and kiss me silly and it still would pale in comparison to the beet farm... Now that doesn’t mean you should cross the Eiffel Tower off the list. There’s no shame in second place,” she counseled. ”It’s just, for me, that experience was perfect”.
“And you think I’m easy? Dwight’s beet farm? Seriously?”
“Yep.”
“Dwight Schrute’s beet farm? With the too small beds, creepy Cousin Mose, the outhouse and, oh god, beet wine?”
“Yep.”
“Huh, that’s either the best thing I’ve ever heard or possibly the worst. Jury’s still out on that one, Beesly.”
“I’m not changing my mind.”
She suppressed a laugh when she heard him sigh dramatically.
“Alright, tell me what I’ve missed today.”
“Well, Michael and Dwight have spent the whole day debating the existence of Bigfoot.”
“Bigfoot? Really?”
“Yes Jim, Bigfoot. A six to eight foot hairy nocturnal bipedal man-ape with excessively large feet that lives in the forests and swamps of North America,” she deadpanned.
“You are serious... Great and I’m trapped here in New York. Hmm... Maybe when I get back we can tell him about the Lake Scranton Monster. That could keep them busy for a few days.”
“Yeah, totally.”
“Do you want me to see if I can get you out of there early?” he offered.
“How could you do- scratch that. Yes, please, yes.”
He chuckled softly. “Just put me through to Michael and I’ll think of something.”
“Are you sure?”
“Armed with the knowledge that our time on the beet farm was your most romantic night means I have to start being a better boyfriend.”
“Alright, hang on.”
Pam walked over to Michael’s office and announced in her practiced nonchalance,
“Michael, I have Jim holding for you on line 1.”
Michael looked up surprised as the frown on Dwight’s face deepened.
Michael picked up the phone. “Jimberly, my man, how’s New York? Did you go to Sbarro yet? It’s still the best pizza in the city.”
Pam lingered outside the door while she listened to Michael on the phone with Jim.
“Good. I wouldn’t steer you wrong on pizza... Well, yes, but that wasn’t my fault. I had a coupon and that kid was asking for it so...” Pam chuckled as Dwight nodded emphatically in agreement with Michael.
“Fine. Whatever. So, what’s up? Is Ryan being a baby again?... A favor? Of course! You know I love to do favors! It’s the part of my job I love the most. Well, that and the acclaim it brings me... Oh... Oh... So you want me to go and... Are you sure? I don’t mind. I’m just sitting here with Dwight and... Pam?... I don’t know if we can afford to lose her today. I mean the hotness quotient is already way down with the loss of Karen and Ryan and you in New York. If a potential client walked in and saw the uggo’s left here they’d probably just walk out... Yeah... Yeah... Well that’s true... Well, thank you. I hear that a lot but coming from you... So, you’re sure I couldn’t just... Yeah, alright... Wait, Jim, what do you think about Bigfoot?... Uh-huh... Uh-huh... Really?... In Lake Scranton?... Wow. Do you think we were in danger at any point?... Hmm... No, I’d like to see what you’ve got on it... Alright, I’ll give you back to Pammy... Sure. See you Monday. Scranton power.”
“Pamalicious, Jimtastic needs to tell you something,” Michael yelled from his office.
Pam went back to her desk and picked up the phone. “What did you say to him?”
“Just that I left a computer manual behind that Ryan sent me and could I get you to go get it and overnight it to me. I then informed him his good looks would anchor the hotness quotient in your absence. Oh, and that my Uncle Tony has been researching the Lake Scranton Monster for years and I would bring him some information on it Monday.”
“You have an Uncle Tony?”
“No, so if you get some free time in the next couple of days see if you can put your amazing skills as a computer animator to work to create the aforementioned monster.”
“Absolutely, I will.”
“Good. I’d better get back in there. I don’t want to lose my seat in the back of the room. I’ll call you tonight. It will probably be late though cause there’s a party where we the gathered drones will get to hangout with our collective corporate bosses. It will be even less fun than it sounds especially since my awesome girlfriend won’t be there.”
“Ah, I hear she has class tonight. Besides I heard a rumor that a certain ex-girlfriend from Utica is attending.”
“How did you know?”
“R.G.N.”
“Of course, The Receptionists Gossip Network. Is there anything they don’t know?”
“Nope. Now that we’ve covered that, have you seen her yet?”
“Oh, yes.”
“And...”
“She said hello which I believe is Karen-speak for ‘I see you live despite my best efforts to kill you via voodoo doll'.”
“Oh. Are you going to be ok?”
“I’d be better if you were here.”
Pam smiled. “Boy, you are good at this.”
“Thank you, but I was being serious.”
“I know. Just try to avoid her death glare and come home safe to me.”
“I will. Talk to you tonight.”
Story Notes:
Jim goes out of town for a few days. Pam reflects on the changes in her life.
Author's Chapter Notes:
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
Chapter End Notes:
Thanks for reading. Much more to come. The story is about 3/4ths done so updates should be quick.
