Pam was always hesitant to open emails from Kelly, especially ones that had “OMG” anywhere in the subject line, but this Thursday had already proved to be exceptionally boring and so with a sigh she clicked the message. After a lot of adjectives and exclamation points came a YouTube video, and once she was sure her computer’s volume was set to low Pam hit play and watched.
She couldn’t help but giggle as the seemingly too-cool-for-school hipsters started to dance, and she took a quick glance around to make sure no one had caught her. Only Jim was looking at her, his brows furrowed as he silently asked what was so funny. She gestured for him to join her, then returned her attention to her monitor.
Jim strolled over, snagging a jellybean before coming behind her counter. “Look at these guys,” Pam said, pointing. Jim knelt down next to her, chewing as he took the video in. She giggled again as the band pranced around the lead singer, and Jim smiled as he chewed. Huddled together so they could both see, they were close enough that she could smell the trace of cherry on his breath. As they watched she couldn’t help but notice in her periphery that Jim had begun tapping his fingers on his knee lightly to the beat, and her smile widened just slightly.
Before the video finished Michael barged out of his office, apparently finally finished with his long conference call with Jan. He scowled at the office at large, then zeroed in on Reception. “Really, Jim? Could we maybe do some work today?” he snapped.
“Absolutely. Sorry,” Jim answered, shooting a quick eyebrows-raised look at Pam that she returned. Once Michael was back in his office, though, she played the video again.
----
Pam was late in joining Jim for lunch in the breakroom – Michael’s bad mood hadn’t dissipated and he had asked her to type up several documents that seemed to have no point other than to make her look like she was being productive. She heaved a dramatic sigh as she walked through the doorway and Jim grinned.
“I already got your lunch out.”
“Thanks,” she said, flopping into the chair next to him and fishing her sandwich out of the brown paper bag.
“He’s in rare form today.”
Pam rolled her eyes as she swallowed a mouthful of ham and cheese. “It’s ridiculous. He gave me a list of at least fifty ‘business phrases’ and said I had to incorporate all of them into this letter.” Jim chuckled as he munched on a chip. They were quiet for a moment.
“I think I’ve played that video, like, a million times already,” Pam finally said.
“Yeah?”
She nodded. “I really like the song.”
Jim took a swig of his soda. “Me too. It’s not my favorite off the album, but it’s good.”
Pam’s eyebrows raised, although she didn’t know why she was surprised. She could see him in her mind’s eye, seeing the band at some tiny, trendy bar in Philly, maybe with some friends from college, sipping an imported beer and nodding along with the music. This was the Jim that she knew existed outside these drab walls, that lived a real life away from her - from all this. He’d told her of outings like these, what he’d done on Saturday nights when she’d been at home, already in her pajama pants and an old t-shirt, watching some college football game with Roy. “Oh, you have…” She suddenly panicked, unable to remember the band’s name but charging on in an overly casual tone, “their album?”
It was Jim’s turn to nod. “Their first one too, although this one’s a lot better.” He set his soda down. “Lemme go grab my iPod; I have the whole thing on there.”
She forced a smile. “Okay,” she chirped, but as she watched him leave she suddenly remembered a scene from her eighth grade year. For Christmas she had finally gotten the “cool,” name brand sweatshirt she’d been pleading for for months. Granted it had meant far fewer gifts – they were at least sixty dollars a piece – but she’d been ecstatic to wear it the first day back to school in January. When she had arrived at her lunch table, one of her friends had smiled and complimented the new top. Flushed with excitement, Pam had thanked her. However, one of Pam’s snarkier “friends” had given her a different smile, one that spoke volumes. “Everyone got one for Christmas, I think,” the girl had said airily. With a quick survey of the cafeteria Pam had confirmed that everyone seemed to be dressed in variations of her same sweatshirt. Her smile had melted away, and suddenly the cozy fleece lining in her sleeves made her feel itchy and hot.
When Jim returned, iPod in hand, Pam knew her cheeks were still pink. If Jim noticed he didn’t feel the need to comment, for which she was grateful. “This is my favorite OK Go track,” he told her as he clicked the selector wheel.
“What’s it called?” she asked, not quite meeting his eyes.
He told her the name without needing to look at the display. Pam popped in the earbud he held out to her and the song began. Jim gave her a questioning smile during the chorus and she nodded, bobbing her head. She quickly looked back at the table, though, for some reason certain that she was off the beat.
---
Pam was nowhere near finished with her faxes as Jim pulled his coat off the rack at the end of the day. “Want me to wait for you?” he asked. She smiled as she shook her head.
“That’s okay. I’m gonna be awhile.”
“All right.” He gave her counter the traditional few taps and smiled. Just as he was about to step away he leaned in again. “Hey, want me to burn you a copy of that CD?”
His overly kind tone reminded her of her offers to Roy for extra help in English in high school – well-meaning, with just a trace of pity. “Sure, that’d be great,” she replied.
He smiled again. “Okay then.” A few more taps, then he turned to leave. “See you tomorrow, Beesly,” he said over his shoulder.
“See ya.”
---
On an unremarkable August afternoon a year later, Pam’s email alert dinged. Opening her inbox, she saw one message from Kelly.
OMG CHECK THIS VID OUT!!! OK Go are so awesome!!!!!!!!!!! I WISH I could do this on a treadmill LOL!
Pam hesitated for a long moment before opening the note and watching the video. The hipsters had upped the ante and for the first time all day, Pam smiled. Once it was finished, she took a deep breath and clicked Forward. However, once a new message appeared, all she could do was stare at the empty text box where an email address belonged.
Her hand moved the mouse in lazy circles. It had been almost two months since Jim had left for Stamford. They’d had no contact. Maybe this could be a starting point. It was safe ground, a nod to their past without being heavy or meaningful.
Finally she sighed and closed the entire window, assuring herself that a better opportunity to reach out to him would arise. He’d probably already seen the video, anyway.
Author's Chapter Notes:
Upon hearing about this idea, Mr. Comment said he wasn't sure of the point. So I thought about it and attempted to focus it. Upon hearing the focused version, Dundie All-Star told me it was good. So I wrote it. That's why I love them both. :)
This starts in the fall of 2005, and the title's from OK Go's "Here It Goes Again."
This starts in the fall of 2005, and the title's from OK Go's "Here It Goes Again."
Chapter End Notes:
