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Dear Pam,
I hope that your head feels better! Wow. I can’t believe that happened to you! I mean, people get hit during dodge ball all the time, but it’s never anything too serious. Right? I hope your headache has gone away by now. If it hasn’t, you should put some ice on it or something. Use the RICE system. We just learned about it in health. Rest, ice, compression, elevation. Now that I think about it, though, it might not work for head injuries. (Elevate your head? Yeah, not so much.) Oh! I’ve got it! You could just take a Tylenol (ha ha ha, I’m funny).
Just because this project is over does not mean that we need to stop writing to each other. I saved your e-mail address, so you’ll definitely be hearing from me in the future. Can’t get rid of me that easily, Beesly!
Here’s an interesting tidbit of information for ya: I was forced by Max to go on a blind date last night. Let me just tell you, never go on a blind date. The girl just wouldn’t stop talking. It was almost as if I was having dinner in the fiery pits of hell. Except instead of fire there were… I don’t know. Excerpts from Vogue magazine or something. And get this: she had a boyfriend. It was scary because in the middle of dinner he came up to our table. I thought he was going to beat me up, too. Nothing happened, I’m still in one piece… but it was a little freaky. I mean, I’m on the basketball team and everything, but I’m not that strong. And this guy was macho.
Seriously, Pam. MACHO.
Okay, moving on. Hey, guess what? I got into NYU! (I know, right?) I was really excited when I got the letter back. I honestly didn’t think that I would be able to make it. I also got an acceptance letter from Lackawanna University. It’s like ten minutes away form my house. I liked it there a lot when I took the tour, but my parents think that I should go to New York. You know, for the experience. The thing is, NYU accepted me for journalism and the college in Scranton accepted me for just plain ol’ education. And I don’t know how much I really want to be a journalist you know? I could still do journalism at Lackawanna… but I’d have other options, too.
By the way, I got a 98 on my midterm. Yeah, that’s right, go Jim. You can’t see me, but I’m doing a victory dance.
And I can’t believe that it’s already March! We started this project in late September… It went by really, really fast. Apparently, the next letters that we’re writing are going to be the last ones. That sucks.
My teacher just told us we’re supposed to write an essay about our pen pal after we get the final letters. I’ve been brainstorming about what to write about you, and I came up with a few facts. Here’s what I’ve got so far:
- You’re an amazing artist
- You were a teddy bear with a cool, French moustache for Halloween
- You’re a crazy cat lady
- You’re an only child
I think that in the next letter you need to write more about you so that I can write more about you! Here are some questions that I need to be answered for the sake of my amazing English grade:
- Why did the chicken cross the road?
- What is your favorite color?
- When will I be able to meet you in person?
- Do you have a boyfriend?
And… just list random facts about yourself, I guess. I figured that I could write a page long essay from that information, but some other stuff might help. About the third question I asked: I definitely think that we should see each other out of school. You’re pretty much my friend now, and I still have no idea what you look like (except your school picture, but that doesn’t count). My car is kind of old, and drives a little slowly, but I’m sure that we could meet in a coffee shop or an alleyway or something. Maybe over spring break?
Oh, bah humbug. My teacher is forcing me to send my picture to you… so don’t laugh, okay? Don’t stop talking to me because I’m so nerdy? Don’t make fun of my hair? I’m a sensitive guy, Pam. I WILL take offense.
Well, I gotta wrap this up… but just remember that the next letter you write will be the last one you’re writing for the assignment. Make it a good one, Beesly!
-Jim
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Dear Jim,
I am very glad that guy didn’t beat you up. That wouldn’t have been very nice of him. And I actually have not been on a blind date. And now I never will, thanks to you.
Jim, I absolutely love your picture! You are such a dork (in a good way)! But that’s okay, we’re dorks together. Judging by your picture, I’m sure that you’ll get a girlfriend before you know it.
Now, to answer your questions:
- The chicken crossed the road because the farmer let him roam free – out of the barn – and he had to cross his road to freedom. (I know, it’s deep.)
- My favorite color is probably going to have to be green.
- One day we will be able to meet in person. I’m going away over spring break, though. I want to do it… I just don’t know when.
- I actually do have a boyfriend. His name is Roy, and he’s on the basketball team.
Let’s see, what else? Here’s a random fact: I’m not exactly that great with children. I love kids, I really do, but I’m just not too good with them. They make me nervous. That’s why I make about zero money babysitting. Um, what else, what else? Here’s one: I can type really fast. That’s something to be proud of, right? My friend Amanda always says that I’m terrible with technology, though, so I don’t really know where typing will help me in life. It’s not like I’m ever gonna work with computers or anything if I’m a technology bum.
I just thought of something! Maybe we’ll see each other at a basketball game! I go to most of the home games. And now that I have your picture – which is hilarious – I can stalk you when we both are there. (Hopefully I’ll recognize you!) But it would be cool if we went for lunch or something one day, or we went to an alley. Maybe we could have a picnic. I could bring a lamp so that we have light. My other friend Sarah said that I should become a lamp decorator, because I made her a lamp cover once. Maybe I could decorate you a lamp and we can use it in our alleyway picnic.
Okay, why am I talking about lamps? I need to know more about you to write a page! I know that you play basketball, you’re a funny guy as well as an amazing writer, you’re a complete dork, such as myself, you’re physically weak, you have two brothers, you have a friend named Max who likes to set you up on lots of blind dates, and you got into NYU and Lackawanna University. (Talk about a run on sentence!) I also know that you were Tylenol for Halloween, which I still do not understand. But I did watch Osmosis Jones after you said that and all I can say is wow, Jim. You seriously based your Halloween costume off of THAT?
I hope that I gave you enough information to write a page about me! If not… too bad, because this is the last letter you’re gonna get out of me!
Speaking of NYU and Lackawanna University, it’s amazing that you got into both! I think that you should go to whichever college that you want to go to. Don’t listen to the man (or your parents).
I guess the rest of the letters that we’re sending will just be straight to each other’s houses. Or e-mail, maybe. It’ll go faster either way. We’ll be able to talk more, y’know? Now our teachers have to mail all the students’ letters to the other teacher and then they have to hand it out and sometimes they forget… yeah. It’ll be faster now. I’ll miss your school letters… but I can’t wait for the more personal ones!
So, to conclude my final letter: it’s been a great project, Halpert. I’ll talk to you soon!
Your friend,
Pam(ela)
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Dear Pam,
Wow, talk about putting pressure on me. I mean, I have to write the last letter of this entire project. It’s like the weight of the world is on my shoulders. I’m sure that if you just make up some interesting stuff about me you’ll get an A. I’m afraid that if you use the truth you will fail, and that’s because I’m not a very interesting person. But of course, you already knew that.
And I am NOT weak. Just because I did not want to stand up to a macho guy does not make me weak. It makes me brave, thank you very much. The fact that I have twiggy arms and chicken legs has nothing to do with it.
I’m sure that you’re secretly great with kids, and you just don’t know it yet. I’m actually pretty good with kids. I’m always watching my younger cousins and they love me. It’s a different story with my brothers, though… they don’t seem to love me too much. I bet they’re just jealous of my awesomeness.
After this, we’ll just continue on the way we’ve been doing things, but we’ll send letters to each other’s houses directly. So you’ll send the letter to my house and then I’ll send it back to you. Right? Oy, so confusing. Maybe we can just use e-mail and make life a LOT easier. (Personally, I prefer the latter, but if you want to go the confusing way, that’s cool too.)
I showed Max your picture. He wanted to know who I had been babbling on and on about for the past few months. I hope that you don’t mind that I showed him your picture. He’s a good friend of mine, so he won’t do you any harm. I mean, he’s a little short, but I guess I just think so because I’m freakishly tall.
I don’t really know what else there is for me to say, except that I’m awesome. But that’s it. I have a few more weeks to decide on the college I’m gonna go to, so you can’t write about where I’m going… you can make up whatever you want to make up, though. I know making stuff up will raise your grade. Tell them I’m a bodybuilder or something. I know you’ll make up something cool.
Granted, I will probably make up some stuff about you. I am planning on telling them that you were going to marry your cat, Archie, but then your boyfriend, Roy came along and told you not to because that would be odd, so you gave up on the wedding. I am also telling them that you plan to cut off a chunk of your ear so your artwork gets shown.
Can’t wait to hear from you, Pam. Talk to you soon!
-Jim Halpert (formality!)
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Author's Chapter Notes:
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This chapter shows the last of the pen pal letters, but don't worry, Jim and Pam are definitely going to keep writing. Let us know what you think, and if you have any comments or questions!
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This chapter shows the last of the pen pal letters, but don't worry, Jim and Pam are definitely going to keep writing. Let us know what you think, and if you have any comments or questions!
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Chapter End Notes:
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We really like the whole letter-writing format of this story, so we're gonna keep it going. But in the next chapter, Jim and Pam are going to be writing to different people and in different ways. (Which I'm gonna spoil for you and say that different ways just means IMing ;) )
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We really like the whole letter-writing format of this story, so we're gonna keep it going. But in the next chapter, Jim and Pam are going to be writing to different people and in different ways. (Which I'm gonna spoil for you and say that different ways just means IMing ;) )
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