Season 5:
”Crazy Love” (Ray Charles & Van Morrison)
Lyrics
And the heavens open every time she smiles
“I really…mmmm….planned something more….” Jim mumbled against Pam’s lips.
“Don’t care.” Pam said as she tried to kiss him back.
She was so beautifully disheveled (naked save for the bra and panties) that he wondered how he survived the last ten days without a glimpse of her. The rest of her (and his) clothes formed a trail from the door to the bed.
“No, I really did!” He insisted against her throat as he nipped and licked his way down to her covered breasts.
“Jim…” A moan escaped when he bit her nipple through the lace bra. “I…really don’t care!”
She protested when he leaned up to look at her, leaving her breasts aching and needing him.
“I know you don’t believe me, but I was planning a more romantic proposal and…” Jim didn’t get a chance to finish his sentence when Pam pushed him onto his back and climbed atop him. His hands automatically went to her hips. He groaned at the feel of her, hot and wet through her panties.
“And I said that I really don’t care.” Pam repeated to her fiancé. Her fiancé! “Jim, you could’ve thrown the ring at me while we were watching TV and said “We’re getting married” and I’d still be happy.” She shook her head and gave him a smile, willing him to understand. “It doesn’t matter how you ask or…or where you ask…it’s just…I just want to marry you, you know?”
Jim looked up into the face of this incredible woman who was going to be his wife and felt his heart grow. “Yeah . . . I know.”
And as the rain continued its rhythmic beat outside the window, inside, the two lovers set a different kind of rhythm.
Yet I'm running to her like a river's song
He knew that if he’d said anything else, tried to influence her choice in any way, Pam loved him enough to come back for him. He would have her next to him every night and she…..she would have that lingering “What if?” and he loved her too much to want that for her. So in the end, he left that choice up to her, knowing that whatever her decision, he would continue loving and supporting her.
And he almost convinced himself that another three months was not a big deal when there she was, waiting for him. She was all smiles and gorgeous in the waning sunlight, saying everything that he thought he didn’t need to hear. I missed you. But nothing else mattered then as he shuffled her into his car, saying they’d pick up her car later. When he ushered her into their apartment and threw all their belongings on the floor, he didn’t think she’d mind that he picked her up and took her straight to their bedroom. I need you. And he didn’t think she’d mind when he drove himself deep into her, again and again, making up for all those nights they had to spend apart. I love you.
Take away my heartache, in the night like a thief
“I don’t deserve you.” Pam mumbled sleepily as she cuddled closer to Jim. Her dad had left earlier that day, having found a place and made a swift move to his new apartment.
“Hmmm?” His voice sounded like he was on the verge of sleep, tired from the events of the day and what they’d been . . . doing . . . for the last couple of hours. She held her breath, waiting to see if he was going to say anything else when she realized her fiancé had fallen asleep.
Propping up on her elbows, Pam leaned over and looked at Jim, feeling an odd protectiveness and overwhelming tenderness toward this man lying beside her. Feeling amazed at who he was. Pam had no words to describe all he meant to her. His goodness, his kindness, his strength, his beauty (inside and out)—everything about him—made her so grateful and proud to be the woman that he chose to share his life with.
Had anyone ever loved her the way Jim did? When she didn’t have the guts to apply to art school, he was the first to tell her otherwise. When she failed said art school, he made her feel like it was less of a failure and more of a life experience. And this recent separation of her parents, he’d done what she asked even when she wrongly blamed him. When she felt sad, happy, mad, angry, and everything in between, he was . . . he was just there.
And she knew that sometimes she didn’t really deserve him (although they’d had this conversation before and he’d just tell her that that’s not how it works, this deserving business).
Instead, Pam just kissed him softly on lips and said, “But I will spend the rest of our lives loving you. And making you happy.” Then she hugged his side and, placing her hand over his heart, fell asleep.
She give me love, love, love, love, crazy love
Jim snapped his fingers, drawing Pam’s attention away from the TV for a moment. “I know! Between the two of us, we can bully Michael into making Ryan sit somewhere else so that you can sit next to me.”
“Are you still thinking about that seating arrangement?”
Jim looked at her incredulously, “Of course! The table next to me is prime real estate, Pam!”
He saw her rolling her eyes and smiling, he dumped her off his lap where she was sitting. “If you’re going to be like that, you can sit at the end of the sofa, away from me.”
His smile became a grin when she promptly climbed back onto his lap and said, “What I meant was that we don’t need to tell Michael a thing. I’d already moved all of my stuff into the desk next to yours. No way are they going to make us sit apart! How else are we going to torture Dwight?”
Yes it makes me mellow down in to my soul
She didn’t know how other women in her situation reacted when they found out that they were pregnant, but she didn’t think she was doing it right. There was the initial shock and surprise when the doctor said, “Congratulations, Ms. Beesly. You’re pregnant.” She was sure that her mouth was gaping like a trout, unable to make any noise until Jim came in and hugged her so tight that she squeaked.
But she was sure the happiness that bubbled inside of her was not normal. Where’s the freaking out part? Isn’t that what people do when they found out they were having a baby that they hadn’t planned for? What about the part where they felt like they were not ready to be parents? Weren’t there supposed to be tears and recriminations? Blaming and fretting about how they were going to do this parents thing?
Yet, the only thing she knew was the way Jim looked at her, as if she cured cancer or found the answer to world peace. The awed look on his face every time he looked at her, each time he touched her, each time he kissed her made her feel invincible and peaceful and ecstatic all at the same time.
There it is: they’re having a baby.
