Something Old, Something New
by Steph
Summary: Kelly wanted her life to be like a movie, preferably a romantic comedy. But it so wasn't. Future-fic.
Spoilers: This season, up to Sabre and Manager and Salesman
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
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Kelly loved weddings. She loved the idea of couples pledging their love forever and ever to each other; loved the dresses and the flowers and the food and the dancing and she especially loved being a bridesmaid.
Kelly should have been having a great time at Andy and Erin’s wedding.
She was not. She was miserable. She knew that she should be thrilled that Erin, who was like her bestest friend around, was so happy and in love. She should have been happy that Andy, who, although weird and loud, was a nice enough guy, had gotten over the fiasco that was Angela and was able to find someone like Erin, who despite being an orphan, was one of the coolest people around. Kelly should have been happy being around two people who were so in love and their wedding was just amazing because Andy’s parents were like totally loaded and the whole thing was like a movie.
But instead of being happy, Kelly was depressed. And pissed off. Kelly was old now (in her 30s!) and she still wasn’t married. She should have been married and have at least one adorable kid by now. Plus, and Kelly would never say this out loud or anything, Kelly was way prettier than Erin, so it didn’t seem quite right that Erin was married and Kelly was totally single.
And Kelly was single. Kelly was single because Ryan hadn’t wanted to marry her and Darryl hadn’t wanted to marry her and Charles Miner hadn’t wanted to marry her (and yeah he was totally married, but guys got divorced and remarried like all the time) and it wasn’t fair.
It wasn’t fair that Erin was married and Pam was married and Phyllis was married and Angela wasn’t married but she probably would be before the year was over and the only other woman in the office who was single was Meredith and Kelly didn’t want to be like Meredith. Because ew.
At least Erin had let her pick her own bridesmaid dress and had even asked her to help her pick her wedding dress and Kelly totally could have been a bitch and picked out something fugly (and maybe she had considered it for like a second), but Kelly wasn’t like that and Erin was so sweet so Kelly had picked out the most beautiful wedding dress ever.
Okay the second most beautiful dress ever. Because Kelly already had the most beautiful dress ever reserved for herself.
But what if she never got married? What if she became a spinster and was alone forever? She shuddered at the thought and tried not to cry or scream when Erin and Andy were pronounced man and wife and Kelly smiled even though if this were a movie Erin would be her sidekick and the sidekicks should never get married before the star. Right?
Kelly was, at that moment, so envious of Erin. Not because of Andy, because although Andy was one of the less creepy men in the office, Kelly was totally not interested in him even though he could dress and sing and dance and everything and yeah there was that brief misunderstanding with the Valentine’s Day card a few years ago but whatever. He was Erin’s and Kelly would totally not interfere and try to steal him away although she probably could if she wanted to. But Kelly loved Erin like a sister (more than she loved her own bratty sisters sometimes) and was so not a bitch.
Kelly danced and socialized and almost caught the bouquet but truthfully she wasn’t having much fun. She hated watching all the happy couples. And all of Andy’s single friends were obnoxious or ugly or both so she was so not interested. And her high heels were way too small and her feet were hurting like crazy and Meredith cornered her in the bathroom with a flask and said they should go out guy hunting because she was wearing her favorite underwear tonight and Kelly shuddered and ran as far away as she could.
Which was the lobby area of the hotel. Kelly had decided not to get a hotel room for the night even though she loved hotels because she had spent a lot of money on the dress and her hair and nails and the gift and the bachelorette party and so on and so on and she didn’t see a need because the hotel was only like forty-five minutes from her house. And it’s not like she was planning a big seduction scene or anything.
Even though she loved big seduction scenes. Like rose petals on the floor and flickering candles everywhere. Just like in the best romantic comedies.
Kelly sat down on one of the lobby couches and slipped off her heels. She surveyed the room, looking for any hot guys. She’d even settle for moderately good looking, anyone to take her mind off the fact that her short bastard of an ex-boyfriend had brought some skanky looking blonde to the wedding and Kelly had no one.
If this had been a movie, Kelly would have looked up and met the eyes of some hot guy and he would be drawn to her beauty and charm and they would fall madly in love and double date with Erin and Andy and the four of them could maybe start a band. That would be awesome.
But the lobby was practically empty. There was an older woman with her daughter, two teenage boys and one man who stood near the desk. He wasn’t hot or anything but there was something sort of familiar about him and Kelly stared, trying to figure out who he looked like.
The man was ordinary looking, neither handsome nor hideous, and Kelly continued to stare before finally figuring out that although they didn’t really look alike features-wise, there was something about the man’s horrendous posture, the ill fitting brown suit, the weary glance around the room that reminded her of her ex-annex mate.
Yep, there was definitely something Toby-ish about him, Kelly decided, pleased for figuring it out. Then she frowned again, thinking of Toby. She hadn’t seen or talked to him since he had left. He hadn’t even told her he was leaving. He said goodbye to her on a Friday afternoon and when she got there on Monday morning his desk was empty, all the pictures taken down, everything. He hadn’t said anything to anyone, had just sort of disappeared. Michael was thrilled, Oscar and Pam were concerned but no one else seemed to care one way or the other. Kelly fidgeted on the couch, suddenly dying to talk to Toby, dying to find out why he had just left, why he hadn’t told anybody anything. She pulled out her cell phone. She thought she might have his phone number still. Kelly scrolled down to the Ts. Yep.
Without giving it a second thought, she pressed call and as she waited she spotted Meredith walking with some older, somewhat skeevy looking guy. The guy was whispering something to her and Meredith was laughing and it was so gross and wrong and even though she knew that it still hurt that even Meredith had some guy tonight and Kelly was the only person ever who was single and it was so upsetting that the second she heard a “Hello” in a familiar soft voice, she said, “Hi Toby” and then burst into tears.
“Hello?” A pause. “Who...who is this?”
She sniffled loudly and kind of grossly. “It’s Kelly. Kelly Kapoor.”
“Kelly,” he said, sounding very concerned. “Are you okay? What’s wrong? Where are you?”
“I’m at a wedding,” she said. “And everyone has a boyfriend or husband but me and I got so depressed and I saw this guy in the lobby area who kind of reminded me of you and that made me think of you and how I hadn’t seen you or talked to you since you left which was like forever ago and so I wanted to call you and see how you were.”
“Oh,” he said. “I’m...I’m okay.”
She waited for him to elaborate, but he didn’t. Finally he cleared his throat and said, “Well...Kelly, I’ll let you uh...get back to your wedding.”
“It’s not MY wedding!” she screeched into the phone. “It should be MY wedding! I should be dressed in a beautiful wedding dress like...have you ever seen Say Yes to the Dress? That show is so awesome. Have you ever seen that show?”
“No.”
“You should totally watch it,” she said. Then she had an idea. “Toby, do you want to hang out?”
Another pause. “Do I want to hang out? When?”
“Now,” she said. “I’m so over the wedding. What are you doing now?”
“Uh...nothing.”
“So come on. I’ll meet you somewhere.” She told him where the hotel was and smiled when he said that he lived like ten minutes away. She smiled even more when he suggested a little cafe just down the street.
Kelly went back to the reception and hugged Erin so hard and told her that she had so much fun and that Erin looked like so beautiful and she and Andy were going to be like totally happy forever.
“You’re leaving?” Erin asked, looking crushed. “But why? Aren’t you having a good time? Andy’s a capella group is going to perform soon. You don’t want to miss that. They’re soooo good.”
Kelly patted her friend’s arm. “I want to hear all about it when you come back from the honeymoon. Love you!” she called.
She did love Erin because Erin was awesome, but Kelly didn’t feel like being at the wedding anymore. What she felt like doing was getting in her car and driving to a small, neighborhood cafe and seeing an old friend. So she did.
She got to the cafe first and found a table. While she waited, she texted her friend Lacy about Ryan’s skanky little hobag and she got so involved with her texting that she almost forgot why she was there and was momentarily surprised when she heard a quiet, “Hey Kelly.”
She looked up and grinned. “Toby!” she yelled. “You came!” She jumped up and hugged him and he smelled...really nice. Like soap and she wondered if he had just showered. His clothes were still unstylish and blah but his jeans and grey sweater were an improvement over his ugly suits.
“Yeah.”
“How are you?” she asked. “I mean I was feeling kind of crappy because of Erin and Andy’s wedding even though I got to be the bridesmaid. Isn’t this the prettiest dress Toby? Don’t I look pretty? I think I looked prettier than Erin and I bet other people thought that as well. But still I was upset because I shouldn’t be single, right? So I was really down but now I’m feeling better because this place is super cute and it’s good to see you again and I’m glad you came so I don’t feel as down, but how are you?”
“Oh,” he said. “I’m okay. Wait? Erin and Andy? From work?”
“Yep,” she said, thrilled that she was the one who was providing the gossip. “Erin is now Erin Bernard. Mrs. Nard Dog. Whatever. They are just so cute together. And he wrote his own vows and serenaded her and everything.” She sighed happily, temporarily forgetting her blinding jealousy. “It’s so romantic.”
“Wow,” he said. “That’s nice.”
The waitress came by and she ordered a hot chocolate and a few cookies. While he ordered tea and a pumpkin muffin, she studied him. He looked pretty much the same, maybe there were a few more lines around his eyes, but nothing super drastic and she was relieved.
“Toby!” she said as soon as the waitress left. “What happened? Did you get fired? No one knew anything. You have to tell me so I can tell everyone.” She really loved being the one providing the gossip. “Was it something really scandalous? Did you do something bad?”
“No,” he said. “It isn’t anything dramatic. Sorry,” he apologized when her face fell. “When we got bought out what we called ‘Corporate’ wasn’t really relevant anymore and Sabre has its own HR department. It’s funny though...”
“What?” she asked because so far the story wasn’t very funny. It was kind of boring.
“Well, I spoke to some of the higher ups at Sabre. They were considering keeping me because, and this may come as a surprise, I had a pretty good work record. Kendall and everyone always gave me good reviews. So I met with them and we were discussing things and well they asked me what I liked best about working at Dunder Mifflin. And I didn’t have an answer right away because...”
“Because you talk really slow?” Toby did everything slow it seemed. He spoke very slowly and it could be annoying because she just wanted him to spit it out already. And he even walked slowly and don’t get her started on his driving. Everyone at work knew not to be a passenger in Toby’s car unless you didn’t care about being on time.
“No,” he said. “And I don’t talk that slow.”
“Whatever,” she said. “You so do. And softly too. You need like to carry around a microphone just so people can hear you.”
He sighed. “And I didn’t have an answer right away because I couldn’t think of anything I liked about working there. I was just miserable there. And I think maybe they could sense it. So that was that.”
“So what do you do now? Are you retired?” She thought being retired would be cool.
“How old do you think I...? No, I’m not retired. I had some contacts here and there and found something similar. I mean it’s not quite similar because I’m not making as much so that’s not great, but in a way it’s better. I mean I don’t feel so...” He looked away from her before he finally answered, “attacked.”
“Attacked,” she repeated.
“Yeah,” he said. “It’s definitely a different environment.” The waitress came by with their food and she watched Toby as he sipped his tea, which smelled kind of foul. Kelly wrinkled her nose. “People there,” he continued, apparently not bothered by the stench emanating from his cup, “tend to ignore me. But in a good way.”
Kelly could not imagine anything good about being ignored. Toby was weird like that. “So are you happy now?”
He continued to sip his tea. Kelly drank her hot chocolate and nibbled at one of the cookies, watching his face. He didn’t respond which kind of annoyed her. Was the question so difficult to answer?
“I’m...less unhappy.”
Kelly thought about that answer. How sad. “Do you have a girlfriend though Toby? Cause that’s important for you.”
He didn’t look at her, concentrating only on the enormous orange muffin in front of him. “Uh...no.”
“That sucks.”
He didn’t look up from his muffin. “Yeah. Well.”
“But you like go out with your coworkers and everything, right?” She frowned at him. “I mean you go out and socialize, right?”
He mumbled his answer and she rolled her eyes. “What? I totally can’t hear you when you talk like that.”
“I don’t know,” he mumbled, just a touch louder than before. “I’m not the most social person around and I...yeah.”
Well that didn’t even make any sense. He picked at his muffin, not saying anything more.
And if he didn’t feel like talking then he could listen. She told him all about what he had missed in his time away from Dunder Mifflin and all about the wedding. She told him about the ups and downs of her and Ryan’s relationship (mostly downs) and how he had dumped her like in the cruelest way possible and was now dating some total tramp whore. And then she told him about Erin and Andy and how adorable they were because they totally were and she told him about the wedding and everything else she could possibly think of.
When they had finished eating, he told her that it was nice seeing her and he was sure that things would work out and to tell everyone at work hello. And he smiled at her, a genuine, yet still kind of shy smile that made his eyes crinkle and it was still early and she didn’t want to have to go back to the wedding so she touched his arm and asked him if he wanted to hang out.
“When?”
“Now.”
“Isn’t that what we’ve been doing?”
“Yeah, but we can keep doing it.”
“I don’t know,” he said. “I think I’ll just head home.”
“Why?” she whined. “I mean what else do you have to do? You just told me you don’t socialize or anything. So what will you do instead? Something totally boring and lame, right?”
“No,” he said. “I got this new anthology of mysteries from the library and I was in the middle of a really good story when you called and...”
She groaned. “Oh god Toby! That is so lame. Wouldn’t you rather go to a movie or something?”
“Well...”
“Oh!” she said as something occurred to her. “I know why you don’t want to do anything. It’s because you’re poor. That’s so okay, Toby. And I know movie theaters are crazy expensive now and my parents used to take me and my sisters to the movies when we were little and it’s like so much more expensive now. I mean especially if you want to get popcorn and a soda which you kind of have to do when you watch a movie, right Toby? I mean not that I should be eating junk food right now because I’m totally trying to lose ten pounds. I totally need to.” She paused then, waiting for Toby to say that of course she didn’t need to lose ten pounds that she was curvy and super sexy and maybe Toby wouldn’t have said that exactly because he was pretty shy it seemed but still he should at least say something nice to her. Because she looked sexy as hell in her bridesmaid dress.
“Well,” he said yet again. “I wouldn’t say that I’m poor exactly because there are so many people less fortunate than I am but I am definitely trying to save what I can. So I don’t know...but you’re right the movies can get kind of expensive.”
“So we can do something else!” She thought of a few alternatives, mentally checking them off as she realized how silly they were. “Oh! I know! We can watch a movie at my place. I have tons of movies. And popcorn too.”
“That’s a sweet offer,” he said. “Maybe another time.”
Was he really turning her down? So he could read? No wonder he had such a crappy social life and no girlfriend.
“Toby,” she said. “You just told me that all you have waiting for you at home is a dumb book. You’d rather be reading than hanging out with me?” At the end of her sentence, she blinked really quickly and in seconds hot tears were streaming down her cheeks.
Yeah she was totally faking. But it was an effective tactic around guys and Toby was no exception. He immediately looked upset and said, “No, Kelly, don’t cry. I’m sorry.”
She continued to fake sob. “It’s just I’m feeling so lonely because of the wedding and I hoped that maybe we could h-hang out together.”
And the weirdest thing happened. At first she had totally been fake crying just to get Toby’s attention so he’d agree to hang out with her or at the very least feel bad about not hanging out with her, but then she started really crying. Really crying because she was sort of lonely and out of it from the wedding and she wanted to hang out with Toby. Not just because it meant she wouldn’t be alone, but because of him. She kind of missed him. And he was at a different job and made less money and he wore shabby clothes and didn’t have a girlfriend and it was so sad that her tears were totally real now.
“Don’t cry,” he said. “Really. I’ll...uh sure...we can go watch a movie now.”
If she had been 100% fake crying she would have been able to stop right away, been able to shrug it off so they could have fun again, but she was crying for real and it took her longer to compose herself and she was hiccuping a little and her eyes were all swollen and red and she needed a hug like crazy and since Toby was right there she sort of reached for him and buried her head into his chest. Which was surprisingly sturdy and solid. She could tell he was surprised, could feel how stiff he carried himself before he relaxed enough to hold her as she caught her breath and calmed herself down.
His arms felt nice around her, she thought. And he still smelled good. She took a breath, then another and she moved away from him slightly. He was watching her; she could see concern in his expression, in his light eyes and tentative smile, and she felt shaky in a way unrelated to her crying jag and all she could hear in her head was the word maybe.
Maybe, maybe, maybe.
She stepped away from him, just a little bit, and told him she had so many good movies and maybe since she was sure he liked old movies, they could stick with a classic. Like Twilight.
“Twilight?” he asked. “That’s the one with the vampires?”
“It’s totally the best movie ever,” she said. “But we can watch something else. Oh Toby this is going to be so much fun! I love watching movies!”
Kelly wanted her life to be like a movie, preferably a romantic comedy. The kind that starred someone like Kate Hudson or Anne Hathaway or Amy Adams. And Kelly could easily see one of them in a movie where they were young and gorgeous but always picking the wrong guy and maybe there would be a male friend of theirs who would show up just the right time when she was upset about a less pretty friend’s wedding and this guy, maybe not the typical hot guy, would fix all her problems and make her feel beautiful and cherished.
When Kelly first kissed Toby, after they had watched The Devil Wears Prada and ate popcorn, and he was reaching his jacket and mumbling his goodbye, she wasn’t 100% sure what she had been expecting. If it had been a movie, it would have been the kind of kiss where you’d see fireworks and people would be cheering not that there were other people in Kelly’s apartment besides them because that would be weird, but that spectacular kind of kiss the audience would have been waiting for all along.
But it wasn’t that kind of kiss. He was too surprised and unprepared and didn’t exactly react in the way she wanted. Or at all. The second kiss, once she insisted that no she wasn’t drunk and yes she knew what she was doing, was slightly better.
The third kiss was much better, and if she didn’t see fireworks or hear cheering, it was certainly good enough for her to take his hand and lead him into her bedroom.
It was weird the places her mind went in the seconds, the minutes before she stopped thinking at all. What she was thinking then was all the things in the past that had bugged her about Toby when they sat together in the annex and now wondering how she could ever be bothered by them again.
She couldn’t see herself being bothered by his soft voice ever again because hearing her name said like that, all whispery and reverent as he unzipped her bridesmaid dress, as his hands and fingers and his mouth and his tongue traveled up and down her skin made her dizzy with pleasure. And how could she ever roll her eyes at his sighing after hearing him react that way as she did some undressing and exploring of her own?
And now after discovering that he looked like a thousand times better naked than clothed she didn’t think she would ever be able to make fun of his bad taste in clothing again. Looking at him now, looking at the surprisingly decent chest and well...everything else...suddenly his clothes didn’t seem quite as important.
Which was a really weird thing for her to think.
And she knew she would never, ever be able to complain about him doing things slowly ever again, not when she was in bed, flushed and moaning, and he was there and then he was there just taking his sweet time and slowly, slowly, slowly he was there and oh....
Then he was... oh! Then he was right there. Oh!
Fireworks. And people cheering.
Not literally. Because it wasn’t like people were watching them because that would be so creepy and she so wasn’t kinky and into things like that.
But what he was doing right now, positioned the way he was in just the right way and calling her name so hoarsely and making her moan something...
Yeah. That she was into.
--
But the thing was, as much as she wanted her life to be just like the best, most romantic movie with the happiest ending ever (wedding! babies!), it so wasn’t. Her life was dating and loving men who weren’t good enough for her. Her life was watching coworkers and friends having weddings and honeymoons and adorable kids while she headed toward spinsterhood. Her life was waking up with Toby in her bed and not sure how she was feeling about it.
Sure last night had seemed like a good idea and had been really awesome and yeah he did like crazy sexy things to her that made her shiver just thinking about them, but here in the light of day, things were different. In the light of day she could see every wrinkle on his face so close up and he had like no hair on top of his head which wasn’t like his fault or anything, but still. There was no disguising the fact that he was way older than her.
And it wasn’t just physical stuff she was thinking about either, because maybe she could overlook things like that because he could be kind of cute when he smiled and he had nice eyes and last night. Last night...
No it wasn’t just the physical stuff she thought as she gazed at him as he began to wake up. It was also the fact that he was poor now and maybe she was shallow but she wanted to go out and he was so shy and antisocial and he would probably pick reading a book over spending time with her and he was depressed like all the time and she couldn’t be with someone depressed right now. She just couldn’t.
She tried to think of a movie with someone like Kate or Anne or Amy or even old school with someone like Julia or Meg dating and falling in love with someone depressed and miserable and older and living happily ever after with him. The only movie she could vaguely remember was one that Ryan watched once because he was so pretentious - this movie with like Nicolas Cage before he turned all weird and she didn’t remember what that movie was called because she totally was reading a magazine when it was on. Except that wasn’t even the same thing because like the chick in it was a hooker and Kelly was so not a hooker which is gross but the guy was depressed and maybe an alcoholic and she was pretty sure Toby wasn’t an alcoholic but she knew he drank occasionally and Ryan once told her that Toby smoked sometimes although Kelly had never seen him take a smoke break at work (“I wasn’t talking about him smoking cigarettes,” Ryan had said, rolling his eyes at her). And she wasn’t sure how that movie had ended because Lacy had called and she had guy drama as always so Kelly took the phone in the other room because the movie was way boring. She guessed it was possible that the movie had a happy ending, but she doubted it.
All these thoughts were swirling in her head as she stared at Toby, who, now completely awake, stared back. She made a face because she didn’t know how to say all she was thinking and make it sound coherent. She guessed she could wait for him to say something first but that could take forever and she kind of wanted to go shopping today.
She opened her mouth and said, “Toby,” but was stopped from saying anything more by him leaning into her and kissing her. It wasn’t a kiss like last night, but something much rougher. Her hands went to him, to his face, stroking his light stubble, He continued to kiss her that way, rough and passionate and so unlike what she had ever thought of him, and all these sensations caused her stomach to flip over and over and her to feel lightheaded and aroused and even more confused.
And then it was over. His mouth left hers and she made a small moan of protest as she registered him moving away from her. His eyes were darker than usual, questioning and still she didn’t say anything because she didn’t know what to say and that was so unlike her.
She continued to watch him silently, her fingers on her lips which felt tender and bruised, and he stared back at her and she wasn’t sure what he saw when he looked at her but he was already getting up, fumbling for his clothes, and when he mumbled something that sounded like an apology, she realized that what he must have seen was an answer to an unasked question, a reason to apologize for something that had been kind of awesome and most of all a rejection that he had probably already seen coming.
The End
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© 2006-2023 More Than That | Skin created by Kali