Since middle school, Jim never thought of himself as a champion self-grattifier. By high school he had gotten past sneaking porn magazines from his older brother (or even the sex articles in his mother's Cosmopolitans- OH GOD!! He still shutters at the memory) having a steady girlfriend once he became point guard for the varsity basketball team by freshman year-the victories were always made sweeter in the parking lot or the woods or in his car after the games. With the abundance of sexual activity, he never felt the true need to masturbate.
However, after working with Pam for three years, it started to get to him. It wasn't that he stopped having sex anymore, but it was never quite as satisfying as it used to be. When he would be with a girl, like Katy and on the verge of climax, an image of Pam would pass through his head and he would begin to come. The image would be as quick as a flash- and not necessarily an explicity image in fact. It would usually just be her face, usually her wearing the pink button-down shirt he always loved, standing in front of the reception desk. She usually held a piece of paper or a piece of artwork she had given him and when Jim was in a normal state he would classify it as completely "non-sexual." The harder he tried to rationalize and prove to himself that it was not the reason for his reaching orgasm, the image would become more vivid and would last longer.
Jim comes back to the house after taking Dwight and Michael to the hospital, and then to Chilli's where Michael INSISTED they had dinner. Jim just bit his tongue and went along with it. Dwight was a little more plesent with his concussion and the day had been more amusing because of Michael's 'condition.' Mark is at his girlfriend's but Jim is too tired from the day to do anything FUN (and what would he do exactly without Mark anyhow?) so he decides to take a shower.
Jim enters the common bathroom. It is a typical guy bathroom- red bottles of Old Spice deoderant on the bathroom sink next to their toothbrushes and navy blue towels that have not been washed since?? hung loosely on the metal bar. He stares down at the chipped, tiled floor and sighs. I need to get my own place. He thinks to himself.
He turns the shower on. He takes his shirt off and puts it over the covered toilet seat. He makes muscles in front of the mirror (what he has been doing since he was a kid) and then begins to stretch his arms. He smooths down his chest hair and tries to see the person that he has become. People always have said that he had a lot of potential, but where is it going? He opens his belt and unzips his trousers and takes his black socks off as he pulls the last of his pants off. He undoes his boxers quickly and jumps into the shower.
He leans against the wall that has some kind of mold that he can't even bear to think about. He's beginning to feel tightly wound again. He didn't feel the tightness as much today because of all the things that kept him distracted from focusing on Pam. Since breaking up with Katy on the Booze Cruise, he never really felt compelled to compensate for lack of sexual activity, but the tightness that he felt around Pam grew even stronger than before. It eventually escalated to him feeling it hours after work and when he would wake up in the middle of the night in an a sweat. Jim realized that he couldn't go on pretending that he didn't think about Pam in that way.
His right hand which had been pressed against his chest, slowly made its way down his torso and hesitated when it reached below his waste- it seemed possessed. His hand reached for his hardeing penis and he begins to apply presure to the tip with his thumb. He pushes himself with his left hand from the wall and and used it to hold the shaft and he started to stroke himself. At first, all he can think about was the pleasure he had been missing the last few weeks. The pure sexual feeling. As it grew he began to wonder if the flashes would ever come. He becomes hopeful that they wouldn't and in a way close this book in his life. He begns to move his right hand up and down his shaft and his left hand pushes against the wall again for support. His breathing is becoming harder and he feels as if he is just about to finsih a race.
Just as he reaches the climax their is flash. Except, it's different this time. He feels as if time has stopped. It is Pam who is holding him now and is about to take him into her. Jim shuts his eyes and tries to erase the image from his head. But it's too late and he has already started to come. The plastic shower curtain is splattered with fluid and him leans full-body against the wall. He catches his breath and he feels like he is about to cry.
